2: Betrayal

PHOENIX

“Will you tell her or should I?” Lila says with a fake innocent tone. I turn to Jake expectantly and he swallows. I shake my head, not wanting to believe what I am seeing.

Not Jake and Lila. My best friend. No, it can’t be. 

“Phoenix, you know I have needs.” Jake mutters, looking anywhere but my face. I stare at him, trying to see if he is joking but he isn’t.

I laugh out loud like a maniac. Trying to convince myself he didn’t just say that of all things. I would much rather believe I’m losing my mind than to find out Jake is cheating on me with Mila, of all people, he picks my best friend.

“What do you mean you have needs?” my voice is exuding a calmness I don’t feel.

I’d refused to give him my virginity before we got married. We would have before we went to college, as the future alpha of the pack he is expected to find a mate and produce an heir. We have our whole life planned, it seems like I was the only one locked in my fantasy.

“Why do you look so dumbfounded? Come on, be realistic, you knew it was going to happen sooner or later.” Lila sneers at me, her wicked tone pulling me from my stupor.

Not having anything to say to her, more than ten years’ worth of friendship flashing behind my eyes. The little jabs, the jokes, them hanging out alone or disappearing for a while. Everything was in front of my face and I’m the only fool that didn’t notice. I was so dumb and in love.

“You’re a piece of shit!” I tell him when he doesn’t say anything, my voice still calm. I have nothing better to say. The Fated Banquet sound like the worst news right now, since one of the main reasons I want to stay back has just been destroyed, and turned to nothing.

“It’s not like that, I promise you Phoenix. I’m still going to marry you, you’re the one that I lo—“

His words get cut off by the sound of the slap resonating around the room. The pain in my hand gives me a little satisfaction.

Lila’s eyes are wide, she never expected me to do that. I turn to her and snarl. Take that bitch. I could feel my wolf, clawing in my mind trying to fight for control so she can teach her a lesson.

I ball my hands into fists and keep them by my side.

“We’re over, asshole.” I say to him, growling.

I turn to walk out of the room but on second thought stop. Lila turned eighteen a week ago, the first week of the current month we are in. A wicked smile makes its way to my lips as I turn to her. “I hope you remember the score of wolves that aren’t virgins at the banquet. Good luck,” I gave her a sweet smile and turned to walk out of the room, not before I saw the flash of horror in her eyes.

I walk out of the house, my eyes burning with unshed tears, my heart is like two little fists being sliced open with a silver dagger. Every new slice shoots through my entire system. I don’t let the tears fall as I walk home, going through the woods where I sit and cry for a while. Letting the pain in my chest expel through the tears. When I finally get ready and started my walk home, my feet hurt, only then do I remember I forgot to wear shoes in my rush to get to Jake. How fucking stupid I was, to think he cared about me?

I reach my house in no time, I pause by the door and do breathing exercises, I don’t want my parents to have any inkling something is wrong. When I am sure I won’t break down into tears if anyone asks me anything, I open the door and step in.

I can hear mum in the kitchen, I pause and kick off my shoes, trying to stay silent but as soon as I close the door, I hear her voice.

“Phoenix, is that you?” she calls from the kitchen and I clear my throat.

“Yes, I’m just going to change.” I say and go to head for the stairs but she peeks from the kitchen.

“I’m making your favorite, red velvet cookies. Congratulations baby.” She sings, with a smile on her face.

“Okay, thank you mum.” I reply then run up the stairs before she has the chance to come out and find me. I don’t want her to see how messy I look, because she would ask questions and I don’t want that. When I get to my room, I close the door and undress before getting in the shower, letting the warm water wash my tears away. Not that it is helping with the burning in my chest, but it’s still better than nothing.

I stay in the shower for more than an hour. I stopped myself from crying longer than that. Jake doesn’t deserve my tears and neither did Lila. Dad came up after a few moments, when he didn’t see me, he mindlinked me and told me to come down for dinner. I didn’t know how the time went by so fast.

We eat dinner together like we always do. No one said anything about my obvious disinterest throughout, but they did try to make me feel better in their own way.

“Let’s play chess,” I find myself voicing after we were done cleaning up. My father’s smile lights up his whole face and it helps me forget everything that happened today.

                                       

“I’ll get you more cookies then.” Mum laughs as she gets up. She knows how competitive we get when playing chess, it’s one of the things I love doing most with my father.

“Ready to lose kiddo?” he asks, ruffling my hair. I duck and grumble about how he is messing my hair. “You’re pretty with your hair wild and all sweetie, so perfect.” He signs ‘perfect’ with his hand and I chuckle.

We settle at the table where our chessboard that we’ve been playing for as long as I can remember was, we keep a tally of our wins. You can read how he used to beat me when I was learning how to play and after I learned, I started beating him too. Now he rarely wins against me.

“You got schooled kid,” dad smiles smugly at me. I only laugh, shaking my head. The smile is more real than any I’ve given them tonight. It was worth losing.

“Just this once that you beat me,” I hold one finger up.

“It’s because you’re always cheating,” he grumbles, pouting like a kid. My father is the drama queen in my parents’ relationship.

Watching them laugh and joke with each other, how he sometimes reaches for her hand, just to touch her, to feel her. He has told me multiple times that he feels as though all of this is a dream, and he would wake up one day and find that he never brought her back from the fated banquet.

Yes, that is where they met. I never really asked how dad ended you there but mum had turned eighteen that month and she was asked to join. It was mostly when people didn’t realize the severity of what happened during those banquets. Mum never really told me about all that happened, but I know dad figured out she was his mate and found a way to fight for her.

Now, the fated banquet, instead of an amazing opportunity to meet your mate, they’ve entirely ruined the name, the meaning of ‘mate’ was no longer a symbol of love, of endless love and ‘fated love’. No, it was something entirely different and baseless.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night,” I mutter, a small smile on my lips.

“Speaking of sleep, it is getting late.” I look up at the old clock on the wall and sigh. It was almost one in the morning.

“Goodnight mum, dad. I love you.” My voice almost broke, but I managed to control it. They didn’t find it weird that I was telling them how much I loved them out of the blue. We’ve always been vocal with each other.

“Goodnight baby, I love you too.” Mum pecks my cheek and pats my hair lovingly.

“Night loser, love you.” Dad winks and pecks me too.

When I get to my room, I already know I won’t be able to sleep, not with all the things running through my mind. After staring at the wall for hours, an idea comes to me and I pick up a pen and paper from the bed.

This is the best way to not break their heart. I tell myself and start scribbling.

When I am satisfied with all I wrote, I fold the paper and keep it where I’m sure they’ll find it tomorrow.

Hopefully, when I’m long gone.