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chapter 23
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Lovers In Disguise chapter 24
I know she doesn't really want me to do that, but I appreciate her attempt. I still try to come up withsomething better, but after a moment decide to for once heed her words, verbatim.“I just hate how you all are able to just forget what Jazz has done, while you shove all the blame atme.”“No one does that.”I glare at her. “Yeah, right. Ever listened to yourself?” My words clearly hurt her, but I quickly go onbefore she can respond.“But it's not just you, have you listened to Alice of late? She's behaving as if we were mereacquaintances and not friends of over a decade. Whatever I do is wrong, whatever I say is frownedupon, while you both fall over yourselves to fawn over this jackass who doesn't deserve yourforgiveness!I won't say I haven't earned my share of scorn, but seriously, do you even realize how much yourbehavior hurts me?”It feels oddly good to voice the words, even though I know that in so doing I'm hurting her in turn. Theonly indication that my
Lovers In Disguise chapter 25
“You actually told me you were happy I stopped moping after that Saturday at Beth's. That you wereglad I was done with being so emo. And now you complain that I took your words to heart?”“I didn't mean it like that! Yes, I admit it, having you lurk around and sulk for two weeks was hell!But that doesn't mean that I don't want you to tell me when something is bothering you!”Silence falls, and it's nearly awkward. We both are at a loss for words, and I'd rather roll over andsleep now than continue this. But of course, Bella being Bella, she has other plans.“Then tell me now? Maybe I understand why you don't even try to mend your friendship with Jazzagain when I see the whole picture.” Her voice is calm but her eyes are pleading with me, and onething I can never do, and that is refuse her anything she asks for. I sigh heavily, then pat the couch nextto me and she quickly climbs over the back rest and sinks into the plush cushions.Again I don't know where to start, and
Lovers In Disguise chapter 26
I have to wake up a lot sooner than I want to, which is no surprise as I only got into bed again fivehours ago. Bella is moderately chipper this morning but trying not to be too obnoxious about it. Iguess she feels like our talk last night has been some kind of important break through or something.Maybe she's right, I can't say.What I am is raw. I'm still feeling vulnerable, exposed, and that makes me edgy. I know it's stupidbecause Bella is the one person in my life I know I can trust with almost everything, and she's morethan just accepting, but that doesn't change that I don't want to be weak.The air between us is a little tense as if we're both stepping lightly around each other, trying to makesure not to unsettle the balance. There are several things I want to ask her, like what she thinks aboutmy decision to try to simply avoid Jasper, but I'm not sure if now is the time for further discussions. Iknow the question will upset her, and I think she needs a littl
Lovers In Disguise chapter 27
"Is it too much to ask that she at least sees what she, and almost everyone else, is doing to me?"I know I sound whiny when I say that, but the damage is done. Rose is quiet for a few moments as ifshe is debating with herself what to tell me, and when she talks again she's no longer taunting me."I think she really didn't see it. You know how Bella wants to live in her perfect world where you canbe the love of her life and Jazz her best friend.Don't hold it against her that she'd rather be a little ignorant than tear herself apart because she can'tdo miracles. But now you opened her eyes and I'm sure she will consider her actions better from nowon. She loves you, and I'm sure she really meant it that she'd always choose you over him. Isn't thatenough for you?"Thinking about her words, I come to the usual conclusion that Rose should have gone into psychologyrather than photography, but then she'd probably drive half of her clients to commit suicide with herinsensit
Lovers In Disguise chapter 28
Life resumes. Not as I have planned before last weekend, but as usual, the world doesn't stop turningjust because I feel like I should really get my head checked.Any ideas that Bella and I have discussed before are moot, at least for the time being. She's prettybusy throughout the whole week, as am I, and we don't really feel like doing either of the two sceneswe've been talking about. I can tell that she thinks I'm too emotionally unstable as it is so she doesn'twant to make me feel even more vulnerable by subbing to her, and I honestly prefer to spend whattime we have snuggled up rather than exerting ourselves in the playroom. It doesn't happen often thatmy taste goes for vanilla over kink, but the fact that Bella doesn't seem to mind is balm on my torturedsoul. For all her still present insecurity that her more limited interests aren't the best match for mineit's good to see that vice versa she's not just with me because I'm willing to tie her up and spank herso
Lovers In Disguise chapter 29
The rational part of me is convinced that Jazz will hold his tongue, but the very same rational partnever saw anything coming that the conniving ass dumped on me, so I choose not to listen to it. Tryingto act as unconcerned as possible, I walk over to the sink and start running hot water to clean thedishes, hoping that no good Samaritan will join me so I can eavesdrop in peace.For a while Charlie and Jazz are chatting about things of only moderate interest to me – a few curiouscases the Forks PD has had over the summer, how Jasper is coping with some recent changes at work,how things are going with Alice. I'm a little taken aback how little I really care about that last topic,as I've always felt like the protective older brother with Alice, but apparently that has changed, too,with all the other things. Slowly I'm running out of dishes and I consider cutting some bread instead,but then Charlie finally asks the question, and I have to control my urge to put down my wo
Lovers In Disguise chapter 30
Charlie only offers a grunt while he looks sheepish, then steers the conversation back to baseballbefore it can get any more awkward. I have to admit, I don't have the same kind of faith in myself thatJazz seems to have, but I can't help feel a little relieved.Yet as the afternoon turns into evening, the very same words start to haunt me, and Bella's concernedlooks tell me I'm doing a bad job trying to appear all happy and normal. It's not like anyone is payingme much attention, with it being her day, as much as she seems to squirm through everyone handingover their gifts.She is positively speechless when she opens the envelope I hand her, containing my official present -the other one still resting in its box upstairs under the bed – and I get some approving smiles fromboth her and my parents at the weekend getaway at a remote resort I've organized, date to be chosenby my dearest herself. The fact that I can't do wrong in her eyes only adds to the disturbed feeling
Lovers In Disguise chapter 31
quick rub-down later the cool marble slab is ready for my devious plan.Then I follow Bella upstairs, already unbuttoning my shirt on the way up.The socks follow, but I keep my jeans on. Not my first choice of playtime clothes, but I don't want tokeep her waiting when she's done showering.While I snatch up all the utensils from the playroom and deposit them on the floor in the kitchen I tryto remember what exactly we agreed on when we were planning this scene together. As I don't thinkanything I want to do will trigger real unease or even fear I decide to wing it, probably not the bestidea, but the only one I can come up with on such short notice.After all, there are just two things I want to achieve. One, for her to burn off most of the frustrationcausing all those frowns and worried looks she thinks I never notice. Two, for me to finally get it intomy head that I am someone who can be trusted. Bella's always been my salvation, somehow it's fittingthat I let her
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Lovers In Disguise chapter 201
Their almost identical grins make me laugh, and I let my head fall against the back of the couch just soI don't have to look at either of them."I really don't give a fuck. As far as I'm concerned, the only room I'm in charge of decorating is theattic upstairs. The rest is up to you.""You can't do that! Don't be such a pussy just because you're afraid Jazz will keep bitching like a littlegirl when you make the right choice.""And what, dear Bella, is better about Edward's former room than mine? My room has the betterfixtures for lights and electronic equipment, and there's even a specially built nook in the back for asmall freezer!""Which is the reason why I think it's better equipped to be the office, not the bedroom! I so need adoor between where I sleep and where you keep your porn collection. Your computer isn't cominginto the bedroom, either.""It's not porn, it's my World of Warcraft collectibles collection!"Thankfully the sound of the doorbell saves me fr
Lovers In Disguise chapter 200
My remark makes her draw her forehead into a frown."You really think he'd be self-conscious just because I was around? He should know that I wouldn'tdo anything to him or talk him into doing anything that he doesn't want to do.""I don't think it's that. It's hard to explain, but he seems happy where he is right now. With us, includedas an equal, loved and cherished, but without any responsibilities or anyone having any expectationsof him. He obviously likes to top in a scene, but he doesn't want to be a Dom, and I don't think thatwill change much. You know that not all of us get off on having to care for someone else like that.""Don't even dare to speak another word. Last time I checked, I was the one telling you it was okay tobe into power play but that it wasn't necessarily a prerequisite, just like everything else. Differentfolks, different strokes, right?""Yes, Mistress."I get an eye roll for that, and I'm disappointed when she doesn't even try to slap me pla
Lovers In Disguise chapter 199
if that still bothers me, and will likely only get worse if we have kids – I know that our family, as itis, will be a warm and nurturing environment for anyone to grow up and live in.The last part of her remark turns my smile into a grin again, and I snort."I already pity the unlucky bitch or bastard who calls Bella's righteous wrath down upon them. Whenshe was out with Rose and her baby last week and someone looked at them in what she thought was acondescending way, she got right in their face. I don't want to think about how much worse it will bewhen it's her own brood that's under scrutiny. She really doesn't suffer fools gladly anymore.""Did she ever? I still remember a time when you didn't have the balls to confess your undying love toher because you thought she'd laugh at such a mushy sentiment, particularly when admitted after themutual destruction of a bottle of tequila."Although it has only been a year, thinking back to a time when I couldn't just walk up
Lovers In Disguise chapter 198
"Can I get you anything else, or will that be all?"Handing Raven back my signed receipt, I smile at her and shake my head."No, thanks. Assembling all of this and putting the new equipment through a series of stress testsshould keep us busy for a while."It's still somewhat weird, but without a doubt more relaxing, to just get a nod and my credit card backfrom her."If you change your mind, we have the scented lubes on sale until after the weekend.""I'll remember that. Thanks," I reply, then grab the last package and carry it to my car, barelymanaging to close the rear hatch after I add my purchases. When I go back into the shop I see that Bethis finally done talking to the woman she has been holed up with in a corner of the café area for the lasthalf hour. I wait until she has left the shop before I saunter over to my former mentor, hugging herbefore I take the seat opposite her."I take it everything is okay - you spent an extra twenty minutes hanging around here
Lovers In Disguise chapter 197
I set a slow and relaxed pace – for one I just love watching Bella writhe under Jazz's mouth, foranother I am aching all over from yesterday's exertions. As much as I don't mind pain in general,feeling my thigh muscles lock up because of that strain is not something that gets me all hot andbothered.Taking Bella's invitation for what it is, Jazz seems to increase the intensity of his ministrationsbecause soon she is moaning constantly as she comes, one hand still gripping his hair, the otherdigging into the mattress. When she goes slack again it is with a glow on her face and a decisive"Ouch!" as she shifts her weight off one hip, wincing briefly.When she pushes his head away he rests it briefly on her thigh, but Bella is not done with him yet byfar. Instead of just lying back now, she starts inching down the bed until she's lying underneath Jazz,their faces almost flush with each other."Let me take care of that," she coos, reaching for his cock and starting to st
Lovers In Disguise chapter 196
I moan into her mouth when she wraps her fingers around my cock, instinctively moving closer to her.Jazz's arm is around my hip while he strokes my stomach, his lips and tongue alternating between myneck and shoulder. None of us is really in a hurry to actually get it on for real, so we stay that way,relaxing and touching each other.Things change when Bella eventually lets me nudge her thighs apart so that I can run my hand up herinner thigh to her pussy, the contact making her moan. Jazz stills for a moment, then pushes his cock alittle more decisively against my lower back, but I ignore him for now. Looking deep into Bella'shalf-lidded eyes, I cup her entire sex with my hand, then push just the tip of two of my fingers into herpussy, feeling her swollen labia wet and warm against my hand. She utters another moan, smilinglanguidly, then stretches and moves her hips into my hand, clearly wanting more.I feel Jazz push himself up at my other side, probably so he can
Lovers In Disguise chapter 195
then I wouldn't have run even if he had told me to suck off a couple of strangers."Jazz shakes his head, still bewildered, while Bella settles back against me and resumes her tale. Hetakes the rest of it better than I've expected, besides a few cut-off moans when she speeds up jerkinghim off. Despite that I'm still curious when he makes a face at both of us at the end."I get why you didn't want me around for roughing her up," he gripes at me, then narrows his eyes."But why did you think you had to keep me from the rest? Beth, Charlotte, Peter and Gerard havewatched me fuck people before. I don't think any of us has a problem with seeing each other's nakedasses anymore."Bella's hand drops from his cock and she rearranges herself so that she is lying on her back, able togaze at the both of us. The look on her face is still somewhat quizzical when she turns to Jazz."I think I'm kind of speaking for Edward and myself when I say we assumed you'd have issues withsomeon
Lovers In Disguise chapter 194
"You know that just like you guys get to fuck each other when I'm not around sometimes, Edward andI end up screwing without you. So what?It's usually a thing of impulsive horniness and opportunity, not a statement of possessiveness. We allknow it happens, and I don't think any one of us is resentful when it does?"She keeps staring at him until he shakes his head."I won't deny that I had a hell of a great time yesterday. We fucked a lot and it was great, we did acouple of things that I've started to miss a little, and a few more I didn't even realize I wanted to dothat badly. But, quite frankly, I think the only reason I felt remotely glad you weren't around the wholetime was because I didn't want to worry about you feeling weird about any of it, because I needed tolet go and have not a care in the world in order for it all to feel as good as it did in the end. I wouldhave loved to share all of it with you if I'd thought you would have appreciated it all as much as
Lovers In Disguise chapter 193
tries to roll them both over. That finally gets her to move for real, but when she tries to push awayfrom him he holds her down, his whole body more or less perched on her back."Let me up, you stupid oaf!""Stupid oaf, eh? What kind of crappy romance novel have you been reading? Is that the worst you cancome up with?" he taunts, then starts tickling her. Bella shrieks, now fighting to throw him off for real,but worn out as she is Jazz has no problem keeping her underneath him.She finally gives up and looks pleadingly over at me; I'm hard pressed not to laugh at them both."Help me!""Now that's unfair," Jazz grumbles, then eases up and rolls off her, coming to lay side by side withher. Bella sneers at him, then grins and settles back into her pillow. She groggily rubs her eyes andyawns loudly, without covering her mouth."You're early."Jazz nods as I repeat my observation, briefly looking from me to her as I join them on the bed atBella's other side."There wasn
