Ever since Thanksgiving I've been dreading Christmas, but it turns out that all the advance worryingand cringing is for naught.For the first time in ages my parents have decided not to celebrate at home, but jet to Hawaii instead.I can see my mother's hand in that, but don't feel like complaining. In the card attached to the envelopeshe's left for us, she snidely comments that she's also 'giving us peace and quiet'together with plane tickets and a hotel suite reservation for three for the week of the US Open ofSurfing in Huntington Beach, California, the first week of August.The rest of our collective family members we avoid like the plague, feeling childish about it, butThanksgiving has left us uniformly weary. We've decided not to tell anyone yet that our happythreesome living arrangement feels like it's bound to stay permanent. Due to distance and busyschedules, Jazz drops out of seeing his folks, and Bella takes the drive to see Charlie and Sue alone,combinin
back to her door three hours later. I don't know what I was expecting, but when I see her standing at the door, holding it open for me, my first reaction is concern. It's been over two months since I last saw her, and the woman standing there neither resembles the vibrant, immature girl I've known for more than half of my life, nor the self- righteous bitch I learned to hate over Thanksgiving. She has gained weight - at least ten pounds - and it actually looks good on her, but her eyes are sunken and surrounded by dark rings, speaking of lack of sleep and other things. I've never seen her wear so little make-up or almost ordinary clothes. "Hi," I offer as I stop at the door, not knowing what else to say. "Hi," she echoes. "Do you want to come in? I'm only blocking the door to keep Mr. Fibbins from escaping into the wild freedom of the stairwell." "Mr. Fibbins?" Before she can answer, a black furry head appears at her ankle, bright green eyes staring at me before the cat giv
I offer lamely, then quickly get up when she just nods."You know the way. But if you're looking for any kind of anti-depressants or other psychotropic drugsin my medicine cabinet, I can spare you the trip.You won't find any."I halt in mid-step, biting my lip at having been caught, but still continue on my way there, although Ikeep my activities to just taking a piss. When I return, Alice is sporting a half enigmatic, half wrysmile."Found what you were looking for?""Toilet paper and soap, yeah, but without the knit doily I nearly didn't recognize the backup roll.""Smartass," she snorts, then nibbles on another cookie. Seeing as my stealthy attempt has failed, I goon the offensive."Not that I disapprove, but why the change? All this -" I look at the spartan décor around us, "sodoesn't fit you.""Maybe I just didn't fit the frills anymore?" she offers, then finishes her coffee and gets up for a refill.I check, she even takes real cream. No wonder she has put on
and they were the best ones I had ever had. And ever since then I have pretty much have been workingon building the new me."I take that all in in silence, and I don't know what to say even when she's done. While I hung out a lotat her family's home before they moved to Florida a few years ago, I never realized the amount oftension that must have existed between Alice and her mother that would cause things to blow up likethat, but in hindsight it all makes sense. I guess I always thought they were just close, but not in a waythat made Alice feel like she had to eventually break away from her."What about Nate?" I finally ask when the only other thing I can think to bring up is more likely tocause some nasty bickering."We broke up. Kind of," she sighs, then shrugs. "I told him I really needed to be alone, he tried tooffer me a shoulder to cry on, and I kicked him out, telling him I didn't need anyone's sympathy. Hestill wouldn't go and I told him that I'm not the wo
That's why I brought Nate to the Thanksgiving dinner, I knew that there wasn't a chance in hell thatcould work out. Only then it looked like it really would, so I had to make sure myself that it didn't."She falls silent, looking everywhere but at me, before finally she catches my gaze. The pain in hereyes is so palpable that I can't even feel angry at what she did anymore."But why? We're your friends, you could have told us. And if not me or Jazz, maybe Rose? You knowthat she would have listened, and maybe made you see reason?""There was nothing she could have said that would have changed things for me. I didn't see it all as Isee it now, I was so in over my head and so desperate and lost and... see, I can't even explain it now!But one day I woke up and no one in the whole world understood me anymore, didn't know who Iwas, and at the same time all of you were strangers to me! I didn't know how to deal with that, andthings only got worse, so I did the only thing I s
"Well then, how about we meet for coffee next week again? And if things work out, I might beg you tolook after the cat when I'm in London. I can't really leave him alone and I don't know too many peoplewho I would want to give the keys of the apartment to, either. Your mom already offered but it'snearly an hours' drive for her, and Rose can't really go outside with the baby when it's so cold.""Sure, just tell me and I'll come over.""Great. Thanks."And just like that, we run out of things to talk about. A first for us, but without her constant need to putherself in the limelight, we'll probably need a little time to find a slightly different dynamic in ourconversations.Still, things are more or less comfortable when we hug good-bye – a warm, close body contact hug,not the air kisses she used to give – and I leave her with the cat on the couch and let myself out. In thehallway, just after donning my coat, I notice a picture frame face down on the mantle of the ward
"Yeah, maybe that's because the only way you shut up is when you're sucking on someone's cock!""You didn't just say that!""Yeah, I did, and I can say it again if you don't shut up -""You don't get to tell me to shut up! But maybe listening for once in your life would help? But, oh, no,it's so much easier to just wallow in silence and kill everyone else's joy with your brooding, right?The moment he gets home I'm going to tell him. Deal with it!"Her declaration is underlined by the click of the bedroom door being closed, then opened a momentlater as Jazz follows her, both of them coming down the stairs. I know that any second now they willsee me, but before I can make up my mind what to do about that, it is too late.Bella looks furious, as if her tone and words hadn't been a dead giveaway, and all of that rage comesbearing down on me now when she sees me standing just inside the door. Yet instead of getting rightin my face she draws it all in, assuming that fragile
For a moment I don't know what I should feel more – pissed off or hurt –but I find myself mostly confused. It's nothing new for Bella to get in my face like that; I know shedeals with her frustration by letting her emotions run rampant, and I prefer that to her brooding andmoping around for ages, but this obviously goes beyond any other fight we've had lately. And beingleft standing in my living room with Jazz, who is seething with anger, while I have absolutely no ideawhat is going on, is not helping things."What the fuck?"Probably not the most eloquent way to phrase the question, but I don't think anything else will getthrough to him right now.Jazz keeps staring at me for several seconds, then grunts, and turns away from me, still tense as hell."Nothing. Forget it.""What do you mean, nothing?" I shout, my own ire rising at the way he's trying to shut me down."Obviously I'm an oblivious asshole that doesn't"get" anything. You could at least do me the courtes
Their almost identical grins make me laugh, and I let my head fall against the back of the couch just soI don't have to look at either of them."I really don't give a fuck. As far as I'm concerned, the only room I'm in charge of decorating is theattic upstairs. The rest is up to you.""You can't do that! Don't be such a pussy just because you're afraid Jazz will keep bitching like a littlegirl when you make the right choice.""And what, dear Bella, is better about Edward's former room than mine? My room has the betterfixtures for lights and electronic equipment, and there's even a specially built nook in the back for asmall freezer!""Which is the reason why I think it's better equipped to be the office, not the bedroom! I so need adoor between where I sleep and where you keep your porn collection. Your computer isn't cominginto the bedroom, either.""It's not porn, it's my World of Warcraft collectibles collection!"Thankfully the sound of the doorbell saves me fr
My remark makes her draw her forehead into a frown."You really think he'd be self-conscious just because I was around? He should know that I wouldn'tdo anything to him or talk him into doing anything that he doesn't want to do.""I don't think it's that. It's hard to explain, but he seems happy where he is right now. With us, includedas an equal, loved and cherished, but without any responsibilities or anyone having any expectationsof him. He obviously likes to top in a scene, but he doesn't want to be a Dom, and I don't think thatwill change much. You know that not all of us get off on having to care for someone else like that.""Don't even dare to speak another word. Last time I checked, I was the one telling you it was okay tobe into power play but that it wasn't necessarily a prerequisite, just like everything else. Differentfolks, different strokes, right?""Yes, Mistress."I get an eye roll for that, and I'm disappointed when she doesn't even try to slap me pla
if that still bothers me, and will likely only get worse if we have kids – I know that our family, as itis, will be a warm and nurturing environment for anyone to grow up and live in.The last part of her remark turns my smile into a grin again, and I snort."I already pity the unlucky bitch or bastard who calls Bella's righteous wrath down upon them. Whenshe was out with Rose and her baby last week and someone looked at them in what she thought was acondescending way, she got right in their face. I don't want to think about how much worse it will bewhen it's her own brood that's under scrutiny. She really doesn't suffer fools gladly anymore.""Did she ever? I still remember a time when you didn't have the balls to confess your undying love toher because you thought she'd laugh at such a mushy sentiment, particularly when admitted after themutual destruction of a bottle of tequila."Although it has only been a year, thinking back to a time when I couldn't just walk up
"Can I get you anything else, or will that be all?"Handing Raven back my signed receipt, I smile at her and shake my head."No, thanks. Assembling all of this and putting the new equipment through a series of stress testsshould keep us busy for a while."It's still somewhat weird, but without a doubt more relaxing, to just get a nod and my credit card backfrom her."If you change your mind, we have the scented lubes on sale until after the weekend.""I'll remember that. Thanks," I reply, then grab the last package and carry it to my car, barelymanaging to close the rear hatch after I add my purchases. When I go back into the shop I see that Bethis finally done talking to the woman she has been holed up with in a corner of the café area for the lasthalf hour. I wait until she has left the shop before I saunter over to my former mentor, hugging herbefore I take the seat opposite her."I take it everything is okay - you spent an extra twenty minutes hanging around here
I set a slow and relaxed pace – for one I just love watching Bella writhe under Jazz's mouth, foranother I am aching all over from yesterday's exertions. As much as I don't mind pain in general,feeling my thigh muscles lock up because of that strain is not something that gets me all hot andbothered.Taking Bella's invitation for what it is, Jazz seems to increase the intensity of his ministrationsbecause soon she is moaning constantly as she comes, one hand still gripping his hair, the otherdigging into the mattress. When she goes slack again it is with a glow on her face and a decisive"Ouch!" as she shifts her weight off one hip, wincing briefly.When she pushes his head away he rests it briefly on her thigh, but Bella is not done with him yet byfar. Instead of just lying back now, she starts inching down the bed until she's lying underneath Jazz,their faces almost flush with each other."Let me take care of that," she coos, reaching for his cock and starting to st
I moan into her mouth when she wraps her fingers around my cock, instinctively moving closer to her.Jazz's arm is around my hip while he strokes my stomach, his lips and tongue alternating between myneck and shoulder. None of us is really in a hurry to actually get it on for real, so we stay that way,relaxing and touching each other.Things change when Bella eventually lets me nudge her thighs apart so that I can run my hand up herinner thigh to her pussy, the contact making her moan. Jazz stills for a moment, then pushes his cock alittle more decisively against my lower back, but I ignore him for now. Looking deep into Bella'shalf-lidded eyes, I cup her entire sex with my hand, then push just the tip of two of my fingers into herpussy, feeling her swollen labia wet and warm against my hand. She utters another moan, smilinglanguidly, then stretches and moves her hips into my hand, clearly wanting more.I feel Jazz push himself up at my other side, probably so he can
then I wouldn't have run even if he had told me to suck off a couple of strangers."Jazz shakes his head, still bewildered, while Bella settles back against me and resumes her tale. Hetakes the rest of it better than I've expected, besides a few cut-off moans when she speeds up jerkinghim off. Despite that I'm still curious when he makes a face at both of us at the end."I get why you didn't want me around for roughing her up," he gripes at me, then narrows his eyes."But why did you think you had to keep me from the rest? Beth, Charlotte, Peter and Gerard havewatched me fuck people before. I don't think any of us has a problem with seeing each other's nakedasses anymore."Bella's hand drops from his cock and she rearranges herself so that she is lying on her back, able togaze at the both of us. The look on her face is still somewhat quizzical when she turns to Jazz."I think I'm kind of speaking for Edward and myself when I say we assumed you'd have issues withsomeon
"You know that just like you guys get to fuck each other when I'm not around sometimes, Edward andI end up screwing without you. So what?It's usually a thing of impulsive horniness and opportunity, not a statement of possessiveness. We allknow it happens, and I don't think any one of us is resentful when it does?"She keeps staring at him until he shakes his head."I won't deny that I had a hell of a great time yesterday. We fucked a lot and it was great, we did acouple of things that I've started to miss a little, and a few more I didn't even realize I wanted to dothat badly. But, quite frankly, I think the only reason I felt remotely glad you weren't around the wholetime was because I didn't want to worry about you feeling weird about any of it, because I needed tolet go and have not a care in the world in order for it all to feel as good as it did in the end. I wouldhave loved to share all of it with you if I'd thought you would have appreciated it all as much as
tries to roll them both over. That finally gets her to move for real, but when she tries to push awayfrom him he holds her down, his whole body more or less perched on her back."Let me up, you stupid oaf!""Stupid oaf, eh? What kind of crappy romance novel have you been reading? Is that the worst you cancome up with?" he taunts, then starts tickling her. Bella shrieks, now fighting to throw him off for real,but worn out as she is Jazz has no problem keeping her underneath him.She finally gives up and looks pleadingly over at me; I'm hard pressed not to laugh at them both."Help me!""Now that's unfair," Jazz grumbles, then eases up and rolls off her, coming to lay side by side withher. Bella sneers at him, then grins and settles back into her pillow. She groggily rubs her eyes andyawns loudly, without covering her mouth."You're early."Jazz nods as I repeat my observation, briefly looking from me to her as I join them on the bed atBella's other side."There wasn