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chapter 105
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Lovers In Disguise chapter 106
the fact that I felt like I had something to prove to myself for a while after the accident that left meincapable of jerking off for half a year alone, and after that it just kind of got a habit, being therebound guy. To which she, 'Rebound guy?', and I, 'Yes, you know, the guy women pick up in a barwhen they're still all torn up about the asshole who just left them, then have great sex with for onenight, a week, or maybe even a month, and after that they move on because it was just sex. No harmdone, fun for everyone involved, don't see that there's a problem.'"I kind of expected her to at least be appalled, you know, the kind of most women get at that, but shejust shrugged and said, all cool, 'So how does that make you feel, no longer being a manwhore?' I wasreally surprised at that, although I already started to wonder why, and asked her if she was like that toall of her clients. She shrugged and explained that it was her job to be what her clients needed –lendin
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tipsy by then. Second option, she doesn't take him serious and laughs her ass off – bad for his ego, butthe way she was looking I couldn't imagine he would mind that much if it raised her spirits some. Butmore likely was what really happened – he told her straight out what he did, asked her if she wantedto try – and one look at her face and I knew he had her. Of course them being them they couldn't justseal the deal then, they had to spend the whole night avoiding each other while so obviously wantingthe exact same thing, but they can be a little slow at times."'Later, after she went home he was all, 'Oh noes, she'll never say yes!' but I didn't even get to tell himto stop moping because right that moment she called, and, guess what, of course she was interested.One would have thought that he would have been excited about this, but no, he got all anxious, startedbabbling about how he didn't want to scare her and stuff, at which point I joked that if he felt heneede
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of progress. I just talked, she listened, but it wasn't anything I hadn't told anyone before. At least untilthe night the four of us went to that club, you know, where Bella had another spell of lethal foot-in-mouth disease and you ran off later?"Even if I had wanted to forget, I couldn't have, and at my curt nod he goes on."She was really upset after that, when she left with us a while later. She was trying to hide it, but youknow how bad Bella is at that. We stopped at a coffee shop because Alice wanted to get a cup, andwhile we others waited outside Bella rounded on me and got in my face, asked me just where I got offon still trying to ruin your relationship. At first I didn't even understand what she meant, until shenearly screamed at me that I should just stop riling you up. I didn't even know what to say, told her I'djust tried to make meaningless small talk with you, at which point she started crying.I was totally at a loss then, and she only got a sniffling
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"Be that as it may, I couldn't just burn the notepad. It was as if those scrawled pages held all that wastrue about my life that no one else knew about. I didn't want Alice to read them so I went to work on aSunday evening to lock them in my desk, but couldn't do anything at all on Monday because theyseemed to be staring at me accusingly. So I called Sheila, feeling insanely stupid about that in itself,and practically begged her to read them. I was so insanely glad when she agreed, I droppedeverything I'd tried to work on before and just walked over to her office to drop the pad off."The days until our next session were endless. Alice constantly got on my nerves, then she wanted toknow what was wrong with me and got pissed when I couldn't tell her, and on top of that she ran intoBella, then threw a fit for days because you'd canceled your wedding. It got to the point where Iactually told her to stop being so ridiculous, which got me banned from the bedroom for the re
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just going through the usual routines without any feelings behind them anymore. I had two sessionswith Sheila that week, and I think for the first time they were actually all about her field of expertise. Ithink she really wanted to tell me to just accept that things wouldn't work out anymore, but I justcouldn't accept it. I was so ready to give up everything just for her."And then we had our last fight. I still don't know what caused it, I mean we were in bed and I wasjust -""I don't really think I need the details about that," I interject.Jazz shrugs, but inclines his head."Sure. Either way, she suddenly shoves me away and runs out of the bedroom, screaming somethinglike, 'I knew that you were just like him!' at me. No idea what she meant, and of course I followedher. Thought I'd find her either crying or screaming in the living room, but she just got herself a bottleof water from the fridge after tying her bathrobe around her, then turned to me and calmly told
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that there's nothing he can say to defend himself. Which is probably the truth. Strangely, that newlygleaned knowledge does nothing whatsoever to ease the rage boiling in my guts, in fact it only leadsto even more frustration.Until suddenly, something else he said makes sense."She knows, doesn't she? Alice knows. That's what she meant with 'You are just like him' – she meantyou're just like me."His loud, somewhat dejected sounding exhale is the only answer I get, but it's not enough for me."Just what the hell did you do to her?""I did nothing!" he shouts back, clearly agitated. "Nothing more than I've done plenty of times with herbefore! Not that you really wanna know, because you still see her as the pure girl seeking love whodoesn't really have an interesting sex life -""Bullshit! I know she fucks round just as much as you, and I've heard my fair share of details! I don'tgive a flying fuck about what she does or what she likes, but I won't stand by while you
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And you really gave me an easy way out when you said that we didn't have to add anything kinky toany future threesomes."And the third one was great again, nothing that made me feel uneasy, we clearly all enjoyed it, andthe little spat you and Bells had afterwards was probably overdue anyway, I told myself."Another pause, and this time I just have to ask again."Really nothing that made you uneasy about it?"His eyes zoom to my face, and for the first time he looks amused when he chuckles."No. Might sound strange, but I've never felt weird about kissing you. Or fucking you. Or being fuckedby you. That part of my sexuality I own, and for whatever reason it's petty much confined to you, ifyou've ever wondered. We've had sex, so what, that doesn't make me gay, nor would that really be anissue for me if it did.""Fair enough."My curt answer makes him snort,but then he sobers up rather fast."Still, I guess that's not the whole truth. Or I don't know, that part is hard
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"Well, that's pretty much it," he finally speaks up again. "You know, now would be a good time for astatement." When I remain silent he sighs, then rubs his face with his hands. "Guess I don't deserveone. Either way, now you know my side of the story. And I hope that when I tell you now that I'msorry about causing so much pain to everyone involved, that it's the truth. I really didn't think, not for amoment, that things could blow so out of proportions. If I could go back in time, I would tell myself toforget that insane idea the moment it came to my mind, and grow a pair and tell you guys that – I don'tknow. I'm not happy with things ending like this. That while I want to be with Alice, I'm not sure thatwill ever work or is everything that I want. And -"He inhales sharply, then looks me right in the eye as he goes on."And that while I will always see Bella as my incestuously attractive childhood friend, somewherealong the way you became just a little more than my
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Their almost identical grins make me laugh, and I let my head fall against the back of the couch just soI don't have to look at either of them."I really don't give a fuck. As far as I'm concerned, the only room I'm in charge of decorating is theattic upstairs. The rest is up to you.""You can't do that! Don't be such a pussy just because you're afraid Jazz will keep bitching like a littlegirl when you make the right choice.""And what, dear Bella, is better about Edward's former room than mine? My room has the betterfixtures for lights and electronic equipment, and there's even a specially built nook in the back for asmall freezer!""Which is the reason why I think it's better equipped to be the office, not the bedroom! I so need adoor between where I sleep and where you keep your porn collection. Your computer isn't cominginto the bedroom, either.""It's not porn, it's my World of Warcraft collectibles collection!"Thankfully the sound of the doorbell saves me fr
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My remark makes her draw her forehead into a frown."You really think he'd be self-conscious just because I was around? He should know that I wouldn'tdo anything to him or talk him into doing anything that he doesn't want to do.""I don't think it's that. It's hard to explain, but he seems happy where he is right now. With us, includedas an equal, loved and cherished, but without any responsibilities or anyone having any expectationsof him. He obviously likes to top in a scene, but he doesn't want to be a Dom, and I don't think thatwill change much. You know that not all of us get off on having to care for someone else like that.""Don't even dare to speak another word. Last time I checked, I was the one telling you it was okay tobe into power play but that it wasn't necessarily a prerequisite, just like everything else. Differentfolks, different strokes, right?""Yes, Mistress."I get an eye roll for that, and I'm disappointed when she doesn't even try to slap me pla
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if that still bothers me, and will likely only get worse if we have kids – I know that our family, as itis, will be a warm and nurturing environment for anyone to grow up and live in.The last part of her remark turns my smile into a grin again, and I snort."I already pity the unlucky bitch or bastard who calls Bella's righteous wrath down upon them. Whenshe was out with Rose and her baby last week and someone looked at them in what she thought was acondescending way, she got right in their face. I don't want to think about how much worse it will bewhen it's her own brood that's under scrutiny. She really doesn't suffer fools gladly anymore.""Did she ever? I still remember a time when you didn't have the balls to confess your undying love toher because you thought she'd laugh at such a mushy sentiment, particularly when admitted after themutual destruction of a bottle of tequila."Although it has only been a year, thinking back to a time when I couldn't just walk up
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"Can I get you anything else, or will that be all?"Handing Raven back my signed receipt, I smile at her and shake my head."No, thanks. Assembling all of this and putting the new equipment through a series of stress testsshould keep us busy for a while."It's still somewhat weird, but without a doubt more relaxing, to just get a nod and my credit card backfrom her."If you change your mind, we have the scented lubes on sale until after the weekend.""I'll remember that. Thanks," I reply, then grab the last package and carry it to my car, barelymanaging to close the rear hatch after I add my purchases. When I go back into the shop I see that Bethis finally done talking to the woman she has been holed up with in a corner of the café area for the lasthalf hour. I wait until she has left the shop before I saunter over to my former mentor, hugging herbefore I take the seat opposite her."I take it everything is okay - you spent an extra twenty minutes hanging around here
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I set a slow and relaxed pace – for one I just love watching Bella writhe under Jazz's mouth, foranother I am aching all over from yesterday's exertions. As much as I don't mind pain in general,feeling my thigh muscles lock up because of that strain is not something that gets me all hot andbothered.Taking Bella's invitation for what it is, Jazz seems to increase the intensity of his ministrationsbecause soon she is moaning constantly as she comes, one hand still gripping his hair, the otherdigging into the mattress. When she goes slack again it is with a glow on her face and a decisive"Ouch!" as she shifts her weight off one hip, wincing briefly.When she pushes his head away he rests it briefly on her thigh, but Bella is not done with him yet byfar. Instead of just lying back now, she starts inching down the bed until she's lying underneath Jazz,their faces almost flush with each other."Let me take care of that," she coos, reaching for his cock and starting to st
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I moan into her mouth when she wraps her fingers around my cock, instinctively moving closer to her.Jazz's arm is around my hip while he strokes my stomach, his lips and tongue alternating between myneck and shoulder. None of us is really in a hurry to actually get it on for real, so we stay that way,relaxing and touching each other.Things change when Bella eventually lets me nudge her thighs apart so that I can run my hand up herinner thigh to her pussy, the contact making her moan. Jazz stills for a moment, then pushes his cock alittle more decisively against my lower back, but I ignore him for now. Looking deep into Bella'shalf-lidded eyes, I cup her entire sex with my hand, then push just the tip of two of my fingers into herpussy, feeling her swollen labia wet and warm against my hand. She utters another moan, smilinglanguidly, then stretches and moves her hips into my hand, clearly wanting more.I feel Jazz push himself up at my other side, probably so he can
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then I wouldn't have run even if he had told me to suck off a couple of strangers."Jazz shakes his head, still bewildered, while Bella settles back against me and resumes her tale. Hetakes the rest of it better than I've expected, besides a few cut-off moans when she speeds up jerkinghim off. Despite that I'm still curious when he makes a face at both of us at the end."I get why you didn't want me around for roughing her up," he gripes at me, then narrows his eyes."But why did you think you had to keep me from the rest? Beth, Charlotte, Peter and Gerard havewatched me fuck people before. I don't think any of us has a problem with seeing each other's nakedasses anymore."Bella's hand drops from his cock and she rearranges herself so that she is lying on her back, able togaze at the both of us. The look on her face is still somewhat quizzical when she turns to Jazz."I think I'm kind of speaking for Edward and myself when I say we assumed you'd have issues withsomeon
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"You know that just like you guys get to fuck each other when I'm not around sometimes, Edward andI end up screwing without you. So what?It's usually a thing of impulsive horniness and opportunity, not a statement of possessiveness. We allknow it happens, and I don't think any one of us is resentful when it does?"She keeps staring at him until he shakes his head."I won't deny that I had a hell of a great time yesterday. We fucked a lot and it was great, we did acouple of things that I've started to miss a little, and a few more I didn't even realize I wanted to dothat badly. But, quite frankly, I think the only reason I felt remotely glad you weren't around the wholetime was because I didn't want to worry about you feeling weird about any of it, because I needed tolet go and have not a care in the world in order for it all to feel as good as it did in the end. I wouldhave loved to share all of it with you if I'd thought you would have appreciated it all as much as
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tries to roll them both over. That finally gets her to move for real, but when she tries to push awayfrom him he holds her down, his whole body more or less perched on her back."Let me up, you stupid oaf!""Stupid oaf, eh? What kind of crappy romance novel have you been reading? Is that the worst you cancome up with?" he taunts, then starts tickling her. Bella shrieks, now fighting to throw him off for real,but worn out as she is Jazz has no problem keeping her underneath him.She finally gives up and looks pleadingly over at me; I'm hard pressed not to laugh at them both."Help me!""Now that's unfair," Jazz grumbles, then eases up and rolls off her, coming to lay side by side withher. Bella sneers at him, then grins and settles back into her pillow. She groggily rubs her eyes andyawns loudly, without covering her mouth."You're early."Jazz nods as I repeat my observation, briefly looking from me to her as I join them on the bed atBella's other side."There wasn
