I

5 years later.

Right now,am in dilemma on what to choose.i stared at the pictures in front of me.

"What do I choose?".I rub my lip as I rack my brain.

There was a knock on the door briefly before it was opened."miss erica".I raised my head so I could look at the intruder.

"Miss bailey?".I called staring at the woman standing in front of me in surprise not expecting to see her."what are you doing here?.I thought you were out of the country".

"I already came back".miss bailey said smiling at me."I couldn't leave you alone with the work any longer.things might not go well".

I chuckled at her words as I realized that she was right."well then I say my thanks".

I signed up with a famous agency modeling for them so miss bailey was assigned to be my manager.she makes most of the decision since I wasn't good at making decisions and to be honest, there's not much I am good at except modeling for them.

"It's no problem miss erica".she said."what's that by the way?".she asked pointing to the paper on my desk reminding me of my earlier dilemma.

"That bad woman got me some offers then she sent me pictures of the theme that I would go with but I don't know which one to pick".I really hated having to choose."could you please help me with it?".

Miss bailey nodded as she moved closer to me so she could help me decide."bad woman huh?".she asked smiling as she scanned the pictures on my desk,she was referring to the name I said earlier."so you still call her that?".

"What I can do?".I shrug."she's a bad man after all and also a profiteer".bad woman is the name I gave to my boss since I started working at the company and only few people know that I call her that though.

I am sure that she must notice but decided to keep silent about it or maybe she just didn't care.

"Haha".I am sure that miss bailey was amused by the way she laughed."you still haven't changed".

"I could say the same for you as well".i say giving her a smirk.i wasn't going to take the credits alone.

"Anyways,am done searching".miss bailey said."I think this would look good on you".she was pointing to one of the pictures.

The picture was taken in a black and white form."why pick this?".I ask.

"Do you not like it?".

"I didn't say that".I said."I just want to know your reason or I can't?".

"I didn't say that".she said but then frowned at me as she realized what I did."you really..".she shakes her at me as she noticed my triumph smile.

"Karma's a bitch".I purposely made my last statement because I knew what she would reply with.this is something that we always do to tease each other.

Miss bailey is a good manager and also has a great personality.i am thankful that I was assigned to be managed by her.she is an amazing person and I adore her a lot but I am not going to tell her that.

"All this while,you have modeled a lot in other themes like olden styles,the modern world,even in retro styles in different colors but never done one in a black and white before".miss bailey explained."I thought that maybe you could do something you haven't done before, something new".

"Hmm".she really is the best in making decisions."I will go with it".

"Don't just go ahead with it because I said so.if you don't want it or if you don't like it,you can do something else". said miss bailey.

"It's okay really".I assured her."I am not just doing this because you said,I also think that it's okay and I like your reason as well.".

"Alright then".miss bailey said."I have a meeting to attend so I have to go".

"Okay.i will see you later".she nods at me then proceeded to leave.

"Miss bailey".she stopped in her tracks and turned to look at me.

"Yeah?".

I smile at her."thank you for everything".

"It's nothing".she gave me a big smile,then she turned and left.

*************

"Honey,you are back".I watched as mom came to hug me with a smile on her face.

"Hi mom".I greeted her as she ended the hug.she held my hands as she looked at me.

"How did your day go?".

"Fine".I said."Miss bailey is back as well so everything went well".

"Dinner's almost ready".mom says walking towards the kitchen."just few more minutes".

"Where's lilac?.I don't see her".I ask looking around for my sister.

"She isn't here".mom answered."probably with her boyfriend ".she didn't show it but I could hear faint jealousy in her voice.it wasn't much but it was there.

Part of me felt bad about that as I knew I was the reason why she was holding back.

"mom".she turned to me but she didn't say anything."you can call him".

"Really?".she looked at me in disbelief."are you fine now?".

I wasn't fine but i wouldn't tell her that.she has always been taking care of me and my needs, it's time she focus on her happiness.

"I feel fine now so you can invite mr brendon to our house".I gave her a small smile.

Mr Brendon was mom's lover who because of me rarely comes to visit.i could still remember when I first met him,the minute our eyes met,I began to feel nauseous all over my body.it's weird how my first meeting with him made me so uncomfortable and sick so I excused myself and went to my room.

At first I thought that it was all coincidence that I felt sick at the same time but it happened anytime I saw him so I started avoiding him in which mom didn't notice at first but noticed later so she told him to stop coming although she didn't understand why yet she wanted me to be comfortable.

She's good to me,too good that it was looking as if she owed me or something.

I thought about the accident and asked her about it but she shrugged me off with an excuse so I dropped the issue.

"Are you sure?".she asked me.

"Don't worry about me mom and just call him".I assured her again."I am no longer uncomfortable".I watched as she brought out her phone and dailed his number.

"I will be upstairs".I said to her walking to my room.

I sat on the bed trying to comport myself before he arrives.i don't want any mistakes.

I heard mom talking to someone downstairs,I know he's here.i changed my cloth before mom would call for me.

"Honey".she knocks before she opened the door entering inside my room."he's here.are you really sure about this?,if you are not I could tell him that you're sleeping".

"I am sure mom".I said."it's time for you to be truly happy and I know that you are happy with him".

"You know I will risk it all for you even at the cost of my happiness because you come first".I looked at her genuine face and I am grateful that she's my mother.

"I insist mom".

Even if I was uncomfortable,I should be able to mask it so my mom could enjoy her date.

"Alright then if you're okay,I am".mom said."let's go downstairs together".I nodded and followed her out of the room.

"Don".mom said as we arrived downstairs.i slowly raised my head so I could greet him.

"Hi".as soon as I saw him,the feelings started again.they were rushing through me agressive this time around.it was more harsh,I didn't know how I survived the few minutes i spent there before I excused myself and went to my room.

I wasn't just feeling nauseous,I felt pains as well and they hurt terribly.

I had no friends that I could talk to ,I was alone in my suffering.it wasn't that I couldn't make friends,i made friends but I couldn't keep them.

Thinking about my life as I layed on the bed,I realized that I was unable to keep friends.i don't know why it's like that.i closed my eyes and soon I blacked out.