Love Denied My Manhood Freedom

I stood in the middle of the room looking around. I still couldn't believe I was here in the house that I bought. Not many 19-year-olds are able to do what I did and buy a house. I had brought the last box in and was excited to start getting unpacked. I arrived here yesterday in the late afternoon. My mother and David were not thrilled, but they knew I needed to do this, and I wanted to do this on my own. I wanted to prove to them and myself that I was capable of this, they had asked if I had told the boys I was moving up here and I told them yes. They also thought I was living with the boys, which was a lie, but I didn’t want them to know I was here. Mom was proud of me heading off to college, but I know she worried. She didn’t need to. Dad, Uncle Stanton, Uncle Harry and Uncle Conrad made sure I was able to take care of and protect myself. I really didn’t think the boys would care if I was here or not. My mother had married David a year and half ago, but they had been together for close to two years. The boys, which included David’s fraternal twin sons, Jayson and Alexi, not to mention their friends Daymon and Lucus, had accepted me into their group even if they were a year older than me. Honestly, Jayson, Alexi and I hit it off that first night we met at dinner. Mom had been trying to arrange a meeting between us for a while, but shit kept getting in the way. After that first dinner Mom and I spent a lot of time at the house. I got to know David, Jayson, and Alexi. A few months later Mom and David got married and things were great. Mom and I moved into their huge mansion. The twins and I got along great, and they always seemed to have to be near me. They were very touchy with me as well, which I was all for. They always had their arms around my shoulders or a hand on my waist. I had a huge crush (hell I still do) on both and had hoped that maybe we would move in together but then shit changed in the blink of an eye about three months into my junior year. 

[{Flashback Start} It was three months into my junior year. Jayson and Alexi (who were seniors) had introduced me to a few of their friends.  Etta, Marnie, and I had clicked right away even if they were the same age as the twins. Etta and Marnie had grown up with the twins. There were a few other girls that more or less hated me, but I could care less. They hung around or on the twins all the time even if the twins ignored them. I was making my way to my next class when I heard Alexi’s voice.

“So, who is she and what is she to the two of you?” Shayla asked.

“Is she like your stepsister or something? You two are so protective of her it is like you want her or something.” Marie asked.

“Her name is Taelin, and she is not our stepsister. Her father passed away when she was younger, but her mother passed away when she was 14. Her mother and our stepmother were best friends. Our stepmother is also her god mother and none of her other family members were able to take her, so our stepmother did.” Alexi told them.

“She is cute, but just someone that lives with us. She is a little too quiet and shy for the two of us.” Jayson commented.

I heard a few of the girls laughing but all I could do was stand there in shock. I thought the three of us were getting along, but I guess not. Fuck them, I don’t care what they think about me. I don’t care what anyone thinks about me. If they don’t want to be seen talking to me or for me to be around them then I will leave them alone. I turned around and walked the other way taking the long way to class. They aren’t worth my fucking time. {Flashback End}]

I began to distance myself from them after that. I spoke with them when I had to, which was mainly at dinner with the family. I didn’t bother them at school. Etta and Marnie had tried to talk with me about what was happening between the three of us, but I would always change the subject. I had more important things to do than worry about people whose opinion doesn’t mean shit. I knew Jayson and Alexi were here attending college, but I made sure they had no idea that I was here as well. I have no doubt that they will be told that I am here by Mom and David at some point. Mom and David don’t even know where I live. They had been out of town when I moved here. I did everything myself. My father passed away when I was 12, but he had left me a substantial inheritance. So, I was able to buy this house mainly because I didn’t want to live in the dorms. I know David bought them a house to share when they left for college last year. I am not sure why David bought them a six-bedroom house or why the house had a second master bedroom. No one had used it since the house was bought which I thought was weird, but it is not my fucking problem. I hadn’t stepped foot in that house once. I let out my breath as I opened one of the boxes and got started putting shit away. 

I have been at this for the last two days. Unpacking sucks! The only saving grace is that I didn’t have that much shit. The only room that was still disorganized was the kitchen, but I have orientation to get to so that will have to wait. I beat the rush to orientation, but soon the room was full. I thought I saw Lucas on my way here, but I am not sure. The guy was standing too far away making it impossible to see his face that clearly. I do not think he saw me, not that I care. 

“Taelin?”  A familiar voice said. 

I glanced behind me to see Etta and Marnie. I let out a squeal as I hugged the two of them. I haven’t seen them as much since they left for college last year. They and the twins had grown up together and were the best of friends. They were over at the house a lot until they left for college. 

“What are you doing here?” Marnie asked. 

“I moved up here a few days ago to attend college. I have my own place here on campus. Where are the two of you off to?” I explained. 

“Do Jayson and Alexi know that you’re here or that you have your own place?” Etta asked. 

“No and I don’t think they would give a fuck. Please do not say anything to them. Mom and David think I am living with them. I answered. 

“Taelin, I think there has been a misunderstanding between the three of you.” Etta told me. 

“There is no misunderstanding. They said some shit that I heard and told all those girls that hung off them how they truly felt about me.” I replied. 

“Taelin those girls hung off them, but Jayson and Alexi had already found the one they wanted before school even started that year. They had already chosen their Queen months before.”  Marnie added. 

I saw a look pass between them, but they promised me they wouldn’t say anything to Jayson or Alexi. I don’t think Jayson and Alexi will care that I am here. I told them what they said, and I could see a look of irritation on their faces. Not sure why they would be irritated. They didn’t seem to notice when I stopped talking to them in high school.  Etta, Marnie, and I headed to a café to grab something to eat and drink. I see a few of the guys that I am guessing are on the hockey team with Jayson and Alexi. I haven’t been to one of their games since my junior year in high school. I was able to come up with excuses last year with it being my senior year. 

This first week has went well. I love almost all my classes except for math. All my art classes are great. I did see a couple of the guys from the hockey team in them. I doubt they know who I am. I am sure Jayson and Alexi haven't even mentioned me to them. I have chosen to ignore them unless I am forced to work with them for whatever reason. I did see one of them point at me. I rolled my eyes and walked away. I do not have time for their shit. I kept waiting for Mom to call me and ask why I was not living with Jayson and Alexi, but so far that has not happened. I had fully expected the few guys I saw; especially the one that pointed at me to tell the twins I was here and for them to tell Mom. Mom wants all of us to come home this Saturday for a family dinner. I will be there, but I am not thrilled with the idea. I bet they will bring their future queen home with them. Whatever I no longer care. Once I graduate, I am hopping on the first plane to Europe. I hope to get a job in one of the art museums in Europe. I am hoping to land a job in one of the art museums in Paris, but who knows? Right now, my main focus is school and that is all that matters.