Chapter Three - This Is Not Happening

The rate at which my heart was beating at was scary as fuck. It was fast and loud. I felt like she could hear it or maybe it would jump out of my chest.. it was just insane.

I looked up again and those eyes took me in. I had no idea what to say or do. She looked hot as ever and she was glowing. Three years, eight months, two weeks, three days later... she still look like that 27 year old..

I suddenly felt hot and like shit for literally burning her with tea. 

"Shit.. are you okay?" I asked and she snapped her head and nodded as if I just kicked her back to reality, "shit.. yeah I'm.. it's.. fuck.. it's hot.."

"I'm sorry... shit... I'm really sorry I didn't look.. are you hurt...?" I mumbled. 

She held my hand instead and pulled me out of the lift carefully, "your hand..."

I winced, "it's okay.. it's nothing.. I'm just worried about your chest.."

She smiled a bit, "it's fine.. these are big girls they can handle hot things..."

I furrowed my brows at her and she laughed nervously looking at my hand, "shit.. umh your hand is a bit red..."

I pulled it away, honestly my hand hurts but I am going to be fine. I just wanted myself to be away from her intoxicating self..

"I'm fine Valentia..."

She nodded, "yeah.. luckily I have a change of clothes.. I'll go change and you go where you were going.. I'm sorry about your tea.."

"No.. God I'm sorry, I really am."

The lift opened and I quickly went in, if I had stood next to her any longer I swear I was going to suffocate.

She watched me as the elevator door closed. And once she was out of sight it was like I could breathe again and my heart felt so fucken heavy.

What the fuck? was she working here? I asked myself hoping I was wrong. But then this building was full of over 40 companies, so I'd probably not meet her again..

who the fuck was I kidding. I just bumped into her right fucken now... first day at my work..!

The lift opened and I walked out and went straight to L.V Publishing House...

"Oh God.. you look like you've been hit by lightening.. did you walk up the stairs?" Jeremy asked the second I came in and I sighed...

"I...."

"What happened? Where's the tea?"

My whole body was shaking and my heart was still beating fast. My mouth was dry. I was just fucked up. How? How the fuck can we work at the same building?

"Olwethu.. honey... please.  You're scaring me. Sit down.. I'll bring you water.." Jeremy said this directing me to the couch. I Looked at my hand.. it was hurting a bit... I sat down and suddenly felt like shit.

I burnt her with hot tea and the only thing I could think about was being away from her... what the fuck? What if she was injured. I should have asked more if she was okay. If my hand looked like this I wonder what her chest looked like.

Jeremy walked in with a glass of water, "here.. and tell me what happened. You look like you've seen a ghost."

"I... shit... I was coming up right with the tea.. and.."

"Your hand... what happened..?"

"Jeremy can you shut up and listen..."

"Okay sorry ma'am. So what happened?"

I shook my head, "I tripped and the tea got spilled.. on someone..."

"Fuck...."

"My reaction exactly..."

"Where's that someone now? Are they Okay?"

I felt like crying. Shit... how can it be such a mess on my first day, "Jeremy I don't know.. she said she's fine.... wait, so, how many companies are here..."

"This floor.. Three.."

"I mean the whole building..."

"63.. because it's 21 floors and 3 companies in each floor..."

Great... She could be working for any of those. There was a slim chance that I'd see her walking here..

"Fuck... Jeremy how can I be so stupid.. it's my first day and..."

The phone started ringing and Jeremy got up from next to me, "it's your first day, Don't be hard on yourself..."

Then he answered the phone, "L.V Publishing House how may I.... oh hey boss we are waiting for you..."

He kept quiet and then suddenly there was this huge smile on his face, "oh really... that's interesting... cool.. I'll see you now now.."

Then after that he laughed his ass out. "Jeremy what's wrong..."

He shook his head, "nope.. nope I can't.. this is really really funny..."

I wanted to hear what was so funny to try and calm my nerves and forget about the weird encounter I had with Vee downstairs.

"Can you talk or just stop laughing.."

God! That made this idiot to laugh even harder, "God I love you.. I love you Olwethu... just be strong..."

"Be strong... why?" I asked confused and he stopped laughing, "because your first day here... has just began..."

The door behind me opened and the smell.. I knew it way too fucken much. I was next to her.. I knew it.. it was stronger now, like she put the perfume on again to get rid of the tea smell...

"See the tea that you went to fetch..."

I shook my head. Of course it was hers, she used to fucken drink that shit back in high school.

"Hi guys..." Valentia said. And Jeremy smiled, "hey beautiful boss lady who just bathed in her own tea..."

Boss lady..? boss lady? Jeremy said boss lady.

GOD...

I felt like dying instantly. The Gods must have turned their backs on me. This wasn't happening. Valentia wasn't about to be my boss. I mean she wasn't my boss. No.. this was just not okay.. it wasn't okay at all.

Valentia stopped on her heals and turned to look at the couch. Again, shock on her face as she saw me.. I was sitting there like a lost puppy..

"Umh... hi .." she said in almost a whisper..

"Hi..." I said awkwardly and looked at my hand..

"Jerry could you hold all my calls until one today, I'm not ready for those.."

"Yes boss.. you look hot, as always.." Jeremy said and I internally rolled my eyes. She was now in a dark blue suit.

I got up and went to the kitchen to wash my hand.. it was a bit red and  tiny painful.. but other than that I was okay. I made coffee and then headed to my office without saying a word. This was just too much. This was some fucked up coincidence.

I closed the door and sat on my chair. How could this happen. I mean out of all fucken companies I worked for how can this happen? How can hers hire me?

There's 63 fucken companies in this building, couldn't she be boss to anyone of those. Fuck!

Seeing her.. it was just torturous... it pushed in emotions I had hidden.

I suddenly felt hot.. I got up and switched on the aircon then went back to sitting down. I had no idea what to do.

She never changed not even one bit, in stead, she got beautiful with age.. She was glowing and still hot..

Shit! I shouldn't be thinking about her like this... She is fucken married. I saw that ring on her finger. So they are still married.

Fuck!

Fuck!

Just fuck!

I didn't need this. I didn't fucken need to be thinking about Valentia almost four years down the line. I was over her. I felt nothing for her.

But fuck.. why did I feel so worked up if I was over her? Why was I even like this at all.

A knock on my door startled me. I smiled when I saw Jeremy standing on the other side of the door. Yep, thank to glass doors we could see each other.

"Come on in.." I said and he opened, "so.. boss is asking for you.."

I panicked immediately, "me...?"

"Well, you are the new editor in chief.. so she's expecting you... now.."

I sighed. This was just fucked up. I got up and we went out of my office.

"Don't worry..." Jeremy said sitting on his chair, "she won't ask you about the tea..." and then he laughed, I showed him my middle finger and then continued towards the office he pointed.

I was met by a door with a huge C.E.O on it. I fixed my dress and took a deep breath before knocking and she cleared her throat, "come in..."

I opened the door and closed it. She lifted her hand up for me to stop on my tracks and kept on writing whatever she was down.

She then looked surprised as fuck when her eyes met mine again. That feeling. That stupid feeling I felt four years ago kicked in.

"Umm Olwethu.. I'm expecting my new..."

"..editor in chief..." I cut her off, "that's me... I'm the new Editor in chief..."

She put the pen she was holding on the table and whispered, "you are what?"

Her reaction was priceless. I had no idea too. If I had known this was her company, I wouldn't have set any foot here at all.

I sighed, "I'm sorry... I didn't know. If I had any idea I wasn't going to apply I just.."

"Hey umh shut the door and sit down.." she said fixing the already arranged papers on her table.

I realized how she didn't even want to make eye contact with me. This was really going to be shitty I knew it.

I did as asked and slowly went to the chair in front of her desk, "I'm really sorry. I didn't know this was your company Valentia.. I just graduated and I got the job.."

"It's editor in chief and not writing. You just graduated..."

"Yeah... the people who interviewed me know that. I didn't bribe anyone I just came here for an interview and I got a call."

She sighed, "I know... I mean I know my HR department and I trust the guys to do what's best for the company.. if they think you're the best then so be it.. I trust them."

I let out a sigh of relief but something was still bothering me. How were we going to work if we were like this. Hardly looking at each other and me mostly having a hard time being next to her.

We sat silently like that and the awkwardness built in. We'd look at each other a bit and then look away.

"So you applied for a job here.. and you didn't know I own this company...?"

Shit.. I expected that, "well.. I applied to a lot of publishing companies if not all of them. So after getting a call Susan helped me research staff about the company and you never came up..."

"I see.."

Then that awkwardness kicked in again..

Fuck!

I cleared my throat, "so what's expected of me."

"Yeah.. shit I'm sorry.. here's a paper that tells you what you should do."

I looked at the paper and started reading it. But then Shit.... I furrowed my brows, "this paper literally says "what you should do... ""

"I know..."

I smiled, "ahh.. I get the joke.."

She nodded a bit, "yep.. that was the joke."

This was awkward as fuck!

If it was four years ago this would have been funny as fuck.. but now this shit was just awkward.

I laughed a bit, "umh yeah it's funny.."

She nodded, "yeah... it would have been if..."

"Yeaah only if.. so we are here now four years down the line and I'm working... for you..."

She looked at me after I said that.

Okay.. it might have came out a bit harsher than I intended.

She fidgeted with her fingers. She looked unsettled or ... nervous I could not say..

"Okay.. On a serious note, you basically work under me.."

My dirty mind.. shit my dirty mind. I soon imagined myself under her.. naked... God. Why did this have to be her and why the fuck was my mind responding like this..

She cleared her throat and I snapped out of my thoughts, "you were saying?"

"That everything goes to you.. and you drop trash and bring me what's worth it.."

"Okay...?" I said and she nodded, "so basically, you read the first five pages, if you get a hunch of wanting to continue reading, you do that.. if it's trash there's a bin in your office..."

"Shit..." I said and she looked at me.

God! Her eyes. They still had the same fucken effect on me. They took me to one place I've never been at.. and each time she looked at me it was a new beautiful place. One place I'd like to travel and explore.

I slowly looked at her neck and realized new tattoes...? Shit! I hated how I still remember almost every detail about her.

"So you give me the final five... and we will work together on picking the last three winners.. if this goes well, if you make me proud here... then you will be rewarded."

She looked so hot sitting there and talking all business. I smiled, "yes ma'am.."

She rolled her eyes, "it's Valentia.. you're not my student anymore."

I got up, "sure Valentia.. is that all?"

She nodded, "yes.. that will be all for today. You will have your email and everything set by tomorrow okay."

"Thank you... and Valentia.."

"Yes..."

"Thank you for not firing me..."

She smiled, "like I said.. I trust the HR guys... so I trust you... wait, how's your hand..?" 

"It's okay I guess.. how's your chest.."

She smiled, genuinely smiled and I loved it.. fuck I was in shit.

"My chest is fine... I was saved by my suit.."

"God I was freaking out... I'm really sorry."

"It's all good.."

I smiled, "I'm glad you're okay..."

"At least it was my favorite tea.."

I laughed and got out...

"So how was it? Did you guys talk about the tea?" Jeremy asked the moment I reached his desk and I rolled my eyes, "go fuck yourself Jeremy.."

He laughed, "my boyfriend does that pretty well thank you.."

The day went by okay...I read them entries.. the company ran a competition before the end of last year and we needed to announce the winners by March this year.. it was January, so this was good.

Later I went home. Shit was still awkward with Vee and I and I realized that shit was going to be like that for a while. I mean darn, she was my fucken boss. It was a bit uncomfortable knowing our history.

As I made my way home and replayed all this... something pissed me off. I remembered I fucken asked Susan to G****e the company for me.. she did and she tried by all means not to tell me the owner.

She didn't fucken tell me...

Suddenly, everything I felt today came back and it was mixed with anger. She betrayed me. She didn't fucken tell me on purpose.

By the time I got home I was fuming with anger. I took off my shoes.

They were still not here.. great. I made a sandwich and took off my dress. I was left in my undies. I was tired as fuck from reading shit at work.

I put on a tank top and then took soda from the fridge and threw myself on the couch.

A few minutes later. The front door opened and then footsteps came running towards me.

"How was it..? God I waited all day to ask this question.." Susan asked sitting next to me.

I kept quiet and kept on eating my sandwich. I was still trying to figure out what I'd say to her.

"Dude... talk.." Precious joined in and I sighed, "it was fine.."

"Fine? Just fine?" Susan asked and I snapped, "how the fuck did you expect it to be Susan?"

They both stared at me in shock.

"Dude calm down. What's up?"

"Why don't you fucken ask Susan... she should know after the stunt she pulled.. How could you, how could you do this to me?" I directed the last statement to Susan.

"Olwethu I can explain.."

"Explain what? That you stupidly let me go to that flippin job interview knowing very well that Valentia Louw was the owner..!"

"Shit say whaaaat?" Precious said.

"Yes I knew... and yes I didn't tell you in purpose. You've been applying for a while Olwethu and with no reaponse, so when I found out who owned L.V.P.H I didn't want to tell you because I knew you wouldn't want to go." She argued.

By now Susan already knew my history with Valentia. She knew everything from our first kiss to the day Vee left. And yet she went ahead and allowed this fuckery to happen.. fuck her!

"You had no right.. no flippin right to do what you did.."

"You needed a job.. and you got it. It's all that matters..."

I rolles my eyes and got up, "I had one fucken long day... I'm not even in the mood to talk to you right now.."

"Olwethu..."

I ignored them and went to my bedroom then laid down a bit trying to calm me down. Susan should have told me regardless. She had no right to hide it from me.

My phone started ringing startling me a bit. It was an unknown number. I answered, "Olz what's up?"

'hey Olz... how are you?'

The voice sounded familiar. Very.. I looked at the number again and had no idea who it was. I put the phone back to my ear, "I'm good thanks and you..."

'i'm good.. you sound tired.. was your first day at work that tiring..'

Paige.. ahh.. I smiled, "yep.. that tiring.. and how was your day Paige..?"

'it was good...'

"So you know what I do but I don't know what you do..."

'i can't say what I do over the phone..'

I laughed at her attempt to actually tell me that she wants to see me again. Nice, it was fucken nice...

"If you wanna see me Paige coz I fucked you good.. just say it and I won't complain..."

She laughed, 'God on second thoughts I don't wanna see you anymore...'

Now I laughed, "ohh so you really did want to see me.."

'fuck your cocky ass.. byeee..'

I laughed, "come on.. just say it.."

'Go fuck yourself Olz...goodnight'

"Night..."

And she hung up.

I laughed and got ready for bed. It was no use to mop around. I had a job to go to tomorrow.

..

The coming days were same awkward but it was becoming better. We would sit and talk normally.. but it wouldn't be for more than 10 minutes. It was like we were running away from each other. Yet it was just so hard.

All my feelings resurfaced from wherever I pushed them to and I was now going crazy again. I was loving her again. But I told myself one thing this time. That I'll love her from a distance. I needed to respect the fact that she was married.

I needed to keep my distance from her.

On Thursday my day started a bit weird.. Vee and I arrived same time, which was at seven and we took the same lift and it was just weird. There was this feeling I couldn't shake off. I felt like I was pulled into her. We looked at each other when the elevator went up. We just stood in one place and stared at each other. It was intense and very sexy at the same time.

I swear to God these intense stares were killing me. Because we had another one in the kitchen during lunch.

Fuck.. this was harder than I thought it would be.

Right now I was in my office on the phone with Paige. This was now becoming a habit. We were calling each other but haven't met again since that friday. I found out that she actually is a model and actress.. which is reasonable since she is beautiful and has a body of a model.. she was cute..

"So... what are you doing weekend..?"

'I have a shoot in the morning on Saturday then I'm free... thinking of meeting?'

Yep she really wanted to meet.

"Yeah if you are free we can meet up for something to drink or ice cream.."

'ice cream sounds nice... I'd love that...'

"Alright.. let's do that then.. talk to you later, let me get back to work.."

'enjoy your afternoon, I'm on my way home now...' she said before I told her to drive safe and then she hung up.

I went back to the manuscript I was reading when suddenly the screen went blank..

"Fuck... Shit no!!"

I dialled Jeremy and he didn't answer. I dialled him again and to my surprise a woman answered..

'hello.."

I quickly hung up. Maybe it was wrong number.

My phone rang and I answered, "Olwethu speaking..."

"It's me... Vee.."

My heart.. God this woman!

"Yes...?"

"Umm the phone by the reception is ringing... and Jerry left already.. were you trying to call him? Coz I answered and you hung up.."

"He whaat?" I asked shocked and looked at the time, "shit.. I didn't realize the time. Yeah It was me calling him... my computer went off and I don't know what the fuck happened.. I was finishing something.."

"I can come take a look at it if you want.."

"I don't know Vee, won't it be too much..."

She laughed, "really...? I have been working here far too long so computers are my thing."

I hated when she was her bubbly self because it was a weakness to me. When she was like that she'd be her nice caring self and I'd just fucken want to love her and that was off the chain. It was unthinkable... It shouldn't even be in my mind.

I sighed feeling defeated, "I'll give you 3 minutes.."

She laughed before hanging up.

I subconsciously checked my make up and fixed how I was sitting. Today I was wearing a navy blue dress with long sleeves and black stilettos. I was honestly comfortable like this and I loved it.

A knock on the door startled me. She was standing there in her khaki pants and white shirt. This woman was sexy as fuck...

I nodded and she walked in.. she came right around the table and stood next to me. Over me.

"Hey, Let's see..." she said trying to switch it on and it didn't budge. She looked under the table, "everything is connected well..."

"Yep..." I said in almost a whisper, "I checked that."

She was so close to me, way too close. I could smell her and she was touching me a bit.

"Okay.. so I need you to pay attention.." she said and I tried to listen. I tried but her voice faded the moment I felt her boob touch my head when she did something to the computer.

The way she smelled intoxicated me yet again..

"When this happens again, you need to press hard on F1 and then..." her voice faded as I inhaled how she smelled. I subconsciously closed my eyes and concentrated on the tiny contact my body had with hers and the way she smelled.

I felt like touching her. I wanted to but I couldn't. She was my boss and was married.

I didn't realize that my head was leaning backwards until it hit the back of the chair. I opened my eyes and found her looking at me intensively or should I say hungrily? 

That look again. The "I want you but can't have you look..." she was giving it to me again.

I started trobbing in between my thighs. I was horny as fuck.. and I stupidly wanted her so much.

We couldn't.. I couldn't. This was wrong.. so wrong.. yet it felt so right. Looking into her eyes was like taking a few steps closer to my future.. I know this sounded so stupid right now but how I felt was killing me. And us slowly leaning towards each other like this was killing me even more.