Chapter 1

Finally, my dream to travel out of the country has become a reality. Not just to travel anywhere but outside this continent. No longer will I have to face Dupe and Dara for money issues, those girls made a laughing stock of me each time I innocently asked them for little help and even little cash. It was not like I wanted to ask them for money in the first place but with the way things turned out drastically for me and my family, I had no other choice, and I am against prostitution or stealing things to survive.

I worked day and night shifts in canteens and a hospital to feed my family, though I was not the firstborn I have been of more help than my older sister has. Moshope does little hair styling and braiding at home because she needed to be watched constantly by our mother, and as the younger child we do not want her exposed to bad things of this world. But no more, and the reason is I got a golden ticket to study abroad for free, that way I will have enough money to earn while I work there to care for mother, Moshope, and my younger brother David.

It has been really hard for me to make ends meet and care for my family at the same time, trying to further my education my vocational interest and hobbies, mom would never give up on me and still encourage I try again until I get accepted which it did in the end.

My mother has been my backbone from the start. She has always been by my side encouraging me with her word of advice, prayers, and other efforts she put into. I am the second child in my family, my older sister had issues with her life so she can't support us in any way, that's just out of the case, so as I was saying I had to leave the country because it was hard for us to stay together in a flat apartment with nosey neighbors who can't mind their business, and things aren't going so well as I thought. 

But the great news for me to travel without any struggle and get a one year free experience in any country of my choice, though I haven't asked details about it neither have they said anything about it but it brought joy and hope into our family. My mother has been emotional since then, she kept singing and dancing to God who made it possible for it to happen and when I told her I wanted to inform some of my friends she declined but did not give me a clear explanation as to why. But my greatest joy is finally being able to help my family after so many years of waiting and struggling.

A few hours ago I board my flight nervously, I was still on the plane that would take me to the destined country I will be studying at and the anxiety hasn't still left my system. This could be a life-changing plan for me, I will be able to work freely and study at the same time. 

I promised mother I will study hard and let no distraction come my way and I will fulfill everything as I promised her. I can still remember the lectures she gave me and how the tears flowed down her cheeks as I was departing from them and entered the airport, we were so close we could not be separable but as life goes on we got to move on also or else will be stuck on the way. Twenty children cannot play for twenty years, life goes on.

2 hours before now...

"Mother, why are you crying? It's not like I am going to be away forever, I promise I will be back." I hugged her lovingly Patting her back while I let the tears that rolled down her cheeks soak my clothes. I looked at my siblings who also looked like they were about to cry, I will miss them than they would miss me, they had no idea how I want to be with them but someone got to take care of the family.

"I am not crying, I am actually happy for you, this is for real. it's just tears of joy forget it." She pats my back soothing the hiccups that nearly came out of my mouth. She then stepped back from me looking at my eyes that resembled her own, we looked so much alike people called me the young Lorena. Her smile was my strength, seeing her happy was my pride and joy.

"I promise mother I will come visit soon, I will make time to come."

She brushed her soft fingers on my cheeks, lost in her own world. I understand saying goodbye to someone you are used to will be difficult than I thought, sometimes we all have to say our goodbyes and go separate ways.

"I understand we do have to say our goodbyes sometimes." She whispered in a low voice. My eyes widen when I realised it was the same thing I was thinking.

"Mom, that is exactly the same thing I was thinking!" I exclaimed.

We all bust out laughing hard and made a  few jokes which caused another round of laughter people around started giving us weird pity looks before we later calmed down to regain our breath before we get kicked out of the airport premises, and I wished them the best for what they do so did they to me. Moshope and David made me swear to call them continuously or they'll hunt me down I pinched their nose playfully in return  and told them I had to leave before I miss my flight where my journey began and a new start.

present... 

"All passengers are advised to put on their seat belts we are preparing to land." I heard the pilot speak from the speakers, everyone quickly fastened their belts preparing for landing.

I watched them put on their seat belts calmly and most resumed calmly to what they were previously doing, I mean how are they calm when I feel like I'm going to vomit.

'They are used to it idiot, they are not like you always scared of everything'

I seriously got mad at myself 'my mind' for insulting me, it's amazing how your mind could call you names and you can't do anything to it.

"Ma'am, please fasten your seat belt."

I looked up at the air hostess before doing as she said. My saftey was more important than acting stubborn. I tried leaning back to relax but anxiety was really creeping up my skin. I felt restless and nauseuos. I have been trying to play it cool since I got inside the plane because I was nervous something might happen. It was my first flight and first travel to anywhere I never had to travel before until now, and my fears for flight did not reduce at all.

Even when I practiced how to keep it cool it wasn't working, there was no one around to tell me I'll be fine and calm me down just like the couple beside me. This made me wish I had a boyfriend, someone who understands me but I am not ready for a relationship yet and I don't know when I will.

The plane shook as it landed, I hanged on to my seat like my life depends on it. I could feel blood rush up my head as panic fills in.

"Oh my Lord save me, oh my Lord forgive me  I will read my Bible and study hard remember I told my mother I was going there to study don't let me die I am too young. God lord, Jesus!"

During my internal rampage I felt someone touch me on my shoulder. I froze then freaked out. "Don't take me to heaven now Jesus I am still your child your humble servant-"

"Excuse me ma'am no one is taking you to heaven we have landed."

My mind went blank for a moment thinking of what I heard. " What did you say angel?"

"I said we have landed, you can open your eyes." The angel told me.

I cracked one eye open unsure if I wanted to see this angel or not. Angels are mighty beautiful creatures you can't just see them the way you want. My surroundings were still the same when I cracked one eye open so I opened the second one wider and looked around no one was actually here aside from me and the hostess who snapped me out of my frenzy state.

"No one's here?" I whispered to myself. Not only did I say it low but the hostess got it.

"Yes no one is." She spoke as if she was bored or tired to continue this conversation. A new country and i've embarrased myself how sweet.

"How long have I been out?" I asked her. She sighed irritated but tried to answer in a not really rude manner.

"About thirty minutes."

Thirty bloody minutes of madness, wonderful me. "Thank you." I told her, if not that she came back I would have been locked here

"Yeah but you got to leave."

"Yes I will." She made sure to escort me out of the plane and left me when I was far away. Well let's hope this day turns out great than it did back there