LILLY'S POV
As I wake up, I look around, everything surrounding me is black. I have no sense of life. I can hear the beeping that surrounds me and the people talking, but I feel it would be better not to be woken up. As I feel the life inside me gone, my heart aches more than it has ever.
I never thought I would ever feel a worse pain than what I felt when I lost my family. Oh! was I wrong, this pain is so much worse it's like someone has ripped my soul from my body and there's no way for it to return. I hate how my life has been turned upside down. I don't want to be a healer, I don't want to be anything, I just want to be left alone to die.
I begin to think that none of this would have happened if my family had been alive, it all could have been avoided. I become so angry with myself, blaming the only people who have ever truly loved me. It is not their fault all that has happened. If they were still here, they would help me fight this life of misery and
As the days continue to pass by, I'm still lost in this world. I lie in this hospital bed, I don't talk, I don't move. I don't want anything to do with anyone. As the doctor and nurses speak, I do not listen. I'm not interested in what they are saying. I do not care about my healing. I will heal repeatedly if I choose to or not. I heard one of them say that Ivan is coming to take me back to his house. I'm scared I don't want to stay with him. I cringe at the thought of staying with him.As I stare outside, wishing I could fly like the birds. I haven't even really stood up from this bed. I hate that I feel so sorry for myself. I need to take control of my life. So, I decided since I am alone, I'm going to try to get up and take a shower. As I unplug the bed alarm, so they cannot hear me stand up. I have no trouble as I make it to the bathroom. Surprised that my legs aren't shaking, but strong.I shut the bathroom door and I lock it so no one can come in. I don't want to
As I can open my eyes, I notice everything is white. I have never been so relieved to die. Now I can understand why Jayden wanted to come here to visit his mother. The feeling is amazing. As I look around, I really don't see anybody, but all I feel is pure happiness. Wondering why I did not feel like this the last time I was here. As I begin to hear my name in a faint tone, I look in the distance, but don't see anything. Then I hear it again “Lilly oh Lilly, my sweet girl.” my eyes filled up with tears when I recognized the voice. I would know that voice from anywhere that's when I began looking for my mother. Excitement runs through my entire body. I begin to shake for once, not in fear but because I'm so happy. As I see my mother, I run to her as fast as I can, excited to feel her touch. It has been so long that I have been able to see her and talk to her, smell her hair. I don't waste any time once she becomes close enough. I then gave her the biggest hug that I h
I don't waste time feeling sorry for myself any longer. I will allow no one to continue hurting me. I'm finished being this weak person who I created through all my grief. Falling for those that have hurt me, thinking I deserve all the misery because of what has happened to my family.I have found satisfaction in my own misery, but I need to stop punishing myself. All that has happened has made me seem weak. I am done with all those who have brought me pain. I will no longer allow myself to feel anything for them any longer. They are my enemy, not my friend. I will make them pay for all they have done to me.Realizing now that I'm going to always miss my family and wish they were here with me. But knowing no matter how hard I wish for them to be here. They are not coming back, they are dead. They want me to excel in my life and be happy. Even though I find it impossible to be happy without them. I am going to have to find a way. 
As we head up to his house, it's just like before. Nothing has changed. All the people gawking at me and whispering. What they all must think, but I don't care. The compassion that I've had most of my life is gone. I figure it's better to feel nothing than to feel anything.In the distance I see a little boy running to me, as my eyes clear I see it's Jayden. He has done nothing wrong, but I'm afraid to show weakness. Knowing Jayden is probably the biggest weakness I have even though everything that has happened is not his fault he is innocent, So why would I not acknowledge him? He is the little shine of light that is in my darkness. I squat down as he runs into my arms, I hug him as tight as I can and pick him up. "Lilly, I have missed you so much, I'm so happy that you are okay."Then the words come out of my month without me realizing, "Oh Jayden, I have missed you so much too."As I'm gripping on to him tighter, I watch as a woman walks towards us. "Now Jayd
As I'm starting to wake up, I feel pain radiating all over my body. As I open my eyes, I am terrified of what is happening to me. I then realize that Ivan is fucking me from behind. I go and grab onto the sheets on the bed to pull myself up, trying to get away from him. When he realizes I'm awake, he takes his cock out of me and flips me over onto my back and gets on top of me.I start hitting his chest, screaming, "get off of me, Ivan, stop this."I feel a hard slap across my face, "I told you, Lilly, that you were going to pay for what you did.""No I don't want this, please Ivan no."I start to kick and punch him as hard as I can, trying to make him stop. When He finally lets go of me, I then make a run for the door, trying to escape him. I try to open the door, but it's looked. I began to bang on the door screaming for help, but no one comes. I then feel as Ivan pulls me back by my hair. He throws me on the bed, I go to get back up. But instead, he th
I get woken up when hearing the door open. I then become scared that Ivan is getting ready to hurt me more. Knowing that I am so weak that I have no fight left in me, It's almost like he wants me to die a slow, agonizing death. Just to come back into a world for him to do it repeatedly.As I tremble in fear, hearing the footsteps coming closer and closer. I close my eyes, not wanting to see what is about to happen to me. Then I feel the loosing of the belt on my leg as my leg relaxes on the bed. Then the same thing with the other leg. I want to close my legs, but I am so weak from all that has happened. Something tells me I don't need to be scared, that I can relax. But I can't help but to be terrified.Then I feel too little hands touch my arm. Immediately my fear just disappears, and I get an overwhelming feeling of pure love. I don't understand this feeling, it's nothing I have ever felt before, and I know who exactly it is saving me, it's Jayden.When
Landon sees me. I can see the shock on his face. I don't think he realizes that Jayden is in my arms. Until Jayden pops his little head up "Hey daddy, please don't be mad at me.""Jayden, what are you doing with Lilly, oh my God what happened.""Daddy Ivan was hurting her. I had to save her, so I did. I tried to tell you, but you didn't listen, so I had to do it by myself.""No Jayden, you did not he is Alpha there are consequences. Lilly, what the fuck why would you let him be involved."?I become so furious that he thinks I would ever put Jayden in any kind of danger at all. What a fucking peice of shit right before I go to say something. Jayden jumps out of my arm. I can tell he is annoyed. "Daddy what is wrong with you, Lilly was being tortured to death. She needed to be saved. I could sense every ounce of her misery and no one should ever have to go through what she had to."I bend down to Jayden with tears in my eyes. "I'm so sorry that you h
I am unsure of what to do. I'm scared, wondering what games he may be playing. I watch as he goes to stand. I back up standing in the middle of the doorway. He stumbles and looks into my eyes, "mine, you're my mate."I am unsure of what is happening. He is starting to scare me. I begin to tremble as I wait for him to snap back into reality. I can be strong, but it doesn't mean I'm not scared. I watch as he steps towards me. I want to stand my ground, but I can't. I go to run, but then all I can think about is what will happen to Jayden.So, I stopped, and I turned around to go back into the bedroom. But he is standing in the doorway, just staring at me. I become uncomfortable with his gaze, and then I realize I am naked. I'm confused by his eyes. It is like this is the first time that he has ever seen me naked before.I get tired of his games. I know that he's pretending he's a monster. He has never been the gentle type, not with me, anyway. "Ivan, what games ar