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I'm Done

Author: Ali Parker
last update Last Updated: 2024-10-29 19:42:56

Xander

I stared up at the ugly ceiling with the plain tiles. There was a hint of yellowing in one corner. It was to be expected in an environment like this, I supposed. I wasn’t going to panic and demand another hotel room. I didn’t care enough to move.

I’d made it to Oregon the day before and had yet to leave the hotel. I wasn’t sure what I was doing there. My dad would not be pleased to see me. The moment of kindness, if it could be called that when he called to inform me of my brother’s death, would be fleeting. I knew that as much as I knew the wind would be blowing at the beach.

The ringing of a phone disturbed the total quiet in the room. At first, I assumed it was coming from the room next to mine or above mine. Then I remembered it was my new phone with a ringtone I wasn’t quite used to. The damn thing had been ringing pretty steadily since this morning.

I knew why. I’d fucked up. I’d blown off the meeting. It was an important meeting, but it wouldn’t have changed my life, ex
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  • Let Me In   Go Away

    XanderIt was time to face the very thing I came to Oregon to deal with. I was putting it off, but that wasn’t going to make it go away. I grabbed the keys to the rental car I picked up at the airport in Portland and drove out to my father’s modest house near the beach.I knocked on the door, feeling an acidic burn low in my belly. When he finally opened the door, I immediately regretted my decision to show up unannounced. He was drunk. I could smell the alcohol coming off him in waves. His eyes were bloodshot, and it didn’t look like he had showered in days. I doubted he had. Probably not since he got the news.“Dad,” I said, unsure of what to expect from him.“What the fuck are you doing here?” he asked.I shrugged. “What do you think I’m doing here?”“You shouldn’t have come.”He walked away from the front door. I followed him into the house and watched as he poured a glass of straight Jack before taking a drink.“I came to help with the funeral arrangements,” I said.He scoffed. “

  • Let Me In   Felon

    EvieI cleaned myself up after discovering Xander’s absence, but I was still a mess. I found myself randomly bursting into tears for no good reason. Half the time I didn’t even know what I was crying about.I just felt fried. My nerves were raw. Every little thing made me cry for no good reason. I stubbed my toe on a chair leg and I burst into tears. I looked at the ocean and I cried. I felt as if I was grieving the loss of not just Kade but Xander.I’d lost him. I’d lost the man I cared for and someone I considered to be a good friend, a companion.I wanted to help Xander. I wanted to know he was okay. I was terrified for him. I hated to think he was alone. I was imagining all kinds of things. I did have an active imagination. It was why I was so good at my job. In this situation, that imagination was not working well for me. I pictured him alone in a dark room, sad and distraught and hating himself.I knew the relationship between him and his father was strained. Who did he have to

  • Let Me In   Not Easy

    EvieNelle had no idea. “And now he’s gone. He wants nothing to do with me. He’s gone and that’s that.”She rolled her eyes. “And you’re just going to give up?”“He’s made his feelings abundantly clear.”“Would you want him to give up if the situation was reversed?”“What do you mean?” I asked.“Would you want him to be there for you if you lost someone important in your life? Imagine you lost your father. Can you imagine getting through it without him to lean on?”That hit home. “No. I couldn’t. I wouldn’t want to be alone, but it’s different.”“He might not know what it’s like to have someone. He doesn’t know what he’s missing.”I groaned. “But I can’t make him want my help.”“Evie, I know you, like really, really know you. You broke into the man’s house, and now you’re going to throw up your hands and walk away? That does not sound like you. Pity Party, party of one, sitting right here.”“I’m not giving up, but I’m not going to make things worse for him.”“Oh, you mean by being the

  • Let Me In   The Funeral

    XanderI parked the rental car on the opposite side of the street from the funeral home. I got out and leaned against the driver’s side door. A steady stream of mourners made their way inside. I had spotted my dad’s car when I drove by the first time. He was one of the first to arrive. Technically, I was first but I never stopped the car. I had been circling the funeral home for an hour.I couldn’t bring myself to go inside. It wasn’t like I would be viewing his body. There would be a big picture of him smiling.No, that wasn’t right. My father would have chosen a photo of him in his uniform. His celebration of life would be more of a celebration of his military career, something I was not a part of. I didn’t understand a lot of it. I certainly didn’t share in the joy of being a military man.A young woman wearing a very small black dress openly sobbed. I didn’t recognize her. Hell, I didn’t recognize most of the people making their way into the home. I didn’t feel like I belonged. I

  • Let Me In   Here for You

    Xander“I know him quite well,” Evie said calmly.“Don’t,” I warned when he opened his mouth. “You can hate me. You can say what you want about me, but she does not deserve your hatred.”He shot me one last glare but didn’t get a chance to say anything nasty. Someone approached him to offer their condolences, freeing me from being trapped in a back and forth with him. Evie led me away.The moment I stepped through the doors into the packed chapel area, I saw Kade’s picture on a massive screen above a platform that was littered with flower arrangements. I didn’t move. I stared at the picture of him smiling and wearing his BDUs.It felt like he was looking directly at me. My heart lurched as I looked into my brother’s smiling eyes. A sound escaped my throat.Evie dropped my hand and put an arm around my shoulders. With a strong but gentle force, she began to lead me down the aisle toward the front row.“No,” I said, pulling back. “Not there.”“You are family. You should sit in the front

  • Let Me In   He Hates Me

    EvieI wrapped my hair up in a towel and pulled on my panties before walking into the room. I had waited all night for Xander to call. He never did, but he texted me a couple times to let me know he was okay. That was enough for me.I was going to catch a flight home tomorrow. I wanted to give him one more day, just in case he changed his mind and needed me.I flipped on the TV just to have a little noise in the room. It was going to be a warm day—in the eighties. I laughed out loud. That was an average to cool day where we were from. I stepped back into the bathroom to brush my teeth and was just rinsing out the last bit when I heard a knock on the hotel room door.I froze, looking down at my undressed body and panicked. I rushed into the room, yanked on a pair of shorts, and managed to pull a T-shirt over my head with the towel still holding up my thick hair. I looked through the peephole to find Xander standing at the door, hands in his pockets.I jerked open the door. “You’re here

  • Let Me In   What It's Worth

    Evie“And I fucked it up,” he replied without any real shame.“You did nothing of the kind. You put your family’s name on the map as one of the leaders of the future. Be proud of what you have accomplished. Don’t let him take that away.”“I say that all the time, but it never really seems to sink in. Then I see him, and I remember why. The man is hard. He doesn’t pull any punches.”“His opinion is his alone. He has a right to it, but it doesn’t make it right. Not even a little bit right.”He seemed to brush it off. He took a drink and stared out at the water. The man drew strength from the ocean. He was a modern-day Merman. I watched as he collected his thoughts. His face, that had moments earlier revealed a hint of the pain he felt, was now devoid of all emotion.“It doesn’t matter,” he said. “There’s nothing that will bring me back here. He said what he needed to and that’s that. Without Kade, there is nothing left between us. I won’t have to listen to him and his ugly comments.”I

  • Let Me In   Sleuth

    XanderI was probably fucking myself over with this, but I was going to do it anyway. I couldn’t resist her.I thought I was over it. I’d ended things with her, but damn, the woman was stubborn. She didn’t take no for an answer, and quite honestly, I was glad she didn’t.The rest of my life was imploding. I wanted to hold on to her for just a little longer. I knew it would never work long term, but having her near right then felt good.I didn’t want to admit I needed her. Technically, I didn’t need her in the sense I wouldn’t survive without her, but if she was here and offering her company, why not take it? It would ease my misery for a bit. I didn’t have to commit to anything. We were having fun. We were friends. Casual friends. Nothing more.Then why did I introduce her as my girlfriend? That was a problem to be handled another day. I stepped off the elevator and walked down the quiet hall of her hotel until I came to her room door. I knocked, and when she opened the door, I felt

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  • Let Me In   Epilogue Part 2

    XanderLaughter floated out of the ballroom behind us. I was glad everyone was having a good time. It was the culmination of a lot of hard work over the year. Every person in there deserved to celebrate their success, including Charlie’s crew.“What kind of business?” she asked. “Are you guys cooking up another scheme to make ships even faster?”“No. I think I’m good for a while now. I have more important matters to focus on.”She touched my cheek. “I better be one of those matters.”“You are. You absolutely are.”“My dad is pretty excited to be a part of all of this,” she commented.“He should be. He made it possible, which is why I gave him a check for his cut of the profits.”Her mouth fell open. “You did what?”I shrugged. “Without him, I never would have gotten those first few ships to try out the new hardware. He offered suggestions that made it work even better. He deserved—no, he earned—that money.”“Wow. Did he accept it?”I laughed and nodded. “Oh yeah, he did. His name is a

  • Let Me In   Epilogue Part 1

    XanderOne year laterPride. That was what I felt in that moment. My ships were heading out to sea. Everyone else was already making their way back away from the dock. I couldn’t leave just yet. I watched the ships navigate out to sea one at a time. I didn’t have children, but I imagined what I was feeling was similar to what a proud papa would feel.I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned to see Charlie next to me.“This is a big day,” he said.“It is. You pulled it off.”“You pulled it off.”“What do you think?” I asked him. “Is it going to work? Do you foresee them falling apart halfway around the world?”He shook his head. “My guys did excellent work. That shit is solid.”“Good. Those test ships seem to be holding up.”“Of course, they will. My team is the best. Your idea wasn’t half-bad either.”“Thanks,” I said, watching as one of the ships cleared the harbor.“You know, you could have made a lot more money with that plan,” he lectured.“I could have but I already have a lot of

  • Let Me In   Shaking Things Up

    Evie“I’m going to make love to you all night,” he promised. “This is just the beginning. This is to tide me over until we get home. I want you in my bed. I want me inside you.”“Yes,” I gasped, my head dropping to my chest as he slid in and out of me. Every stroke touched new places. Every stroke sent my body into a wild tailspin of desire and need. “Please. Please. Don’t stop.”He didn’t speed up his pace. He kept moving in that slow steady rhythm, sliding in, grinding his hips, and then gliding out and leaving just the tip inside me. The spasms rocking through me made it difficult for me to remain standing. I wanted to crumble in a heap at his feet with him still inside me.“This is just the first,” he said, his voice strained. “I can’t hold back. Your body is milking me. You are too tight. Too hot. Too fucking wet.”“Don’t hold back,” I told him. I needed his release. I could feel mine hovering just out of reach as if my body refused to give in until it had his complete surrender.

  • Let Me In   Making Love in the Park

    EvieI was being terribly irresponsible. I was not the girl who got naked in the park and had sex. Unfortunately, when I was with Xander, all bets were off.And he loved me. The words echoed through my mind over and over. He loved me. I would follow him into the fires of hell knowing he loved me. I didn’t realize just how badly I needed to hear those words from him.He loved me. I loved him. I didn’t know what that meant for the two of us, but damn if I was going to pass up the chance to find out. The way he was kissing me was different. Maybe it was mind over matter, but I could practically taste the love on his tongue. It was in the way he touched me. The gentleness of his hand on my cheek, holding me steady while his tongue plundered inside my mouth.“Over here,” he said as he broke his mouth away from mine.I felt a little dazed. His kiss made me feel drunk on lust. Again, I was ready to follow him anywhere if it meant I got more kisses like that. He took my hand and led me away f

  • Let Me In   I Love You

    Xander“Xander, I want to believe you, but I’m hesitant.”“I know. I expect that. It isn’t just the memories of Kade that brought me back. You. Memories of being with you. Thinking about this place and our time together. Those are all really good memories. I want more memories like that.”“You are saying all the right things,” she said with a smile. “You know I can’t resist you.”“I’m counting on it.”“I’m glad you are back,” she said.“Me too. Does this mean you will entertain the idea of having a relationship with me?”“I could be convinced,” she said.“I am going to work very hard to convince you,” I vowed.She sipped her wine. “How are you doing? Like really doing?”“I’m doing a lot better thanks to you.”“Thanks to me?”“You are a sneaky little lady,” I told her.She raised her eyebrows. “Me? Sneaky?”“I got a call yesterday.”“Congratulations.”“Oh, you’re cheeky too.” I laughed. I opened the picnic basket and pulled out the small cheese tray and peeled back the plastic. “You ho

  • Let Me In   Forgive Me

    XanderI was so close to losing her. I sensed it in her voice. I wasn’t expecting her to jump at the chance to see me, but I wasn’t expecting such resistance either.The sense of urgency I felt was making me anxious. I couldn’t imagine my life without her. It had taken me way too long to realize how I felt about her. Anytime I thought about my life in a month or a year or in ten years, she was there. I wasn’t sure how it happened, but I knew she was a person I wanted in my life. It wasn’t even a want. It was a need. I needed the woman like I needed air.I was prepared to chase her down if I had to. I would do whatever it took to make her hear me out. I knew there was still a chance she would kick me to the curb. I wouldn’t blame her if she did. I had fucked up. A lot. I would spend the next year trying to convince her to give me a chance. I couldn’t explain when things clicked but they had.It was like the light went on. I hated that I was so ignorant for so damn long. I hated to thin

  • Let Me In   Our Spot

    Evie“I don’t know,” I answered. “I didn’t take the call. I was in a meeting. And it wasn’t the kind of meeting that allowed me to answer my phone.”“Did he leave a voicemail?”“Nope.”“I hate that,” she groaned.“Me too. If it was important, he could leave a message. The guy has fallen off the face of the earth again. He hasn’t called or texted and now he blows up my phone? I’m not interested.”“Liar,” she shot back.“Okay, I am interested but I don’t want to make it too easy.”“You know you’re never going to be able to think of anything else if you don’t call him back and find out what he wants.”“Won’t that make me sound like I’m desperate for his attention?” I asked.“No. The man called you. Calling him back is just polite.”Truly, I was looking for her approval. She had given it to me and now I was anxious to call him and find out. “I’m going to do it.”“Let me know,” she said and hung up.I held the phone in my hand, tapping it against my forehead. I needed to mentally brace mys

  • Let Me In   What Does He Want?

    EvieI pulled up the images from a sweet-sixteen party I had planned about six months ago before I turned my laptop for the new client to see.“Oh wow, that is stunning!” the mother exclaimed.“I don’t want pink,” the spoiled princess pouted.I smiled, remaining calm. “You don’t have to have pink. You can choose any color you want.”“No,” the mother quickly interjected. “We are not having black.”The girl scowled. “I wasn’t going to say black.”I kept my smile in place. The affluent family had reached out to me last week. Initially, I didn’t want to do it. I was in no mood to deal with a spoiled teenager.“What colors were you thinking about?” I asked.“Purple,” she answered. “I want several shades of purple.”“Oh, that’s very regal,” her mother said with a relieved smile. “I like it.”“I was at a party you planned for my friend like a year ago,” the young girl said. “She said you were really good. My party has to be better than her party.”Ah, teenage envy. “We will do our best.”“We

  • Let Me In   Go Fix It

    Xander“No, I don’t suppose it was. You did it for yourself. You made something of yourself. I’ve kept my head in the sand, trying to ignore what you’ve been doing. I did a little research. You have changed the world, just like you said you were going to. You really did something remarkable. Your mother used to show me newspaper clippings with your name. I know I didn’t say it, but I’m proud of you. I’ve always been proud of you.”I put the bottle of beer down. I could not continue to drink it if he was going to send me into coughing fits every time he dropped one of his little bombshells. “You are?”“I am. I should have told you before. You are my son. I’ve said some pretty shitty things. I don’t know how to make them go away but I was hoping we could try and start over.”I felt like I was being pranked. Maybe I was dreaming. In thirty-two years, my father had never believed I was worthy of his last name. “You want to start over? I’m sorry, Dad. This is all coming out of left field.

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