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FIFTY SIX | Chin Up, Darling

[ZARINA]

Something happened, not sure what, but something did.

A few minutes ago, we were having this intense make-out that literally set every inch of me on fire. I have never felt like this before, as if my heart would burst with this raw and passionate feeling loading it up, as if the knots in my stomach would explode like confetti. I can hardly wrap my head around what I did out there. Did I really confess to liking what happened last night? Why on earth did I do that? He must think I’m some crazed woman who is pining for the man who kidnapped her. Is this what they call Stockholm syndrome? Am I sick?

A small part of me isn’t certain if what happened in the kitchen was something that should have taken place. I kissed Xavier, for the love of God. What would he think of me if he came to know about Vladimir and me? What if Vladimir learned of the kiss Xavier and I had? These confused feelings are not helping me right now.

Despite this being a situation that I really should be worried
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