ODETTE
My shaky, numb fingers didn't feel the condensation that had built on the chilled glass of lemonade. I couldn't feel the smooth surface of the glass itself or the amount of pressure I was using to grip it. However, I could see that it wasn't much, and—no matter how much I tried—I couldn't get a firmer hold on it.
Frustration stirred in my belly and my jaw locked to keep my whimper from escaping. I felt useless and the more I tried to hold this glass, the more the feeling stomped down on me with no mercy. Tears brimmed my eyes and I felt my lips quiver with an oncoming sob but I was in public so I refused to let myself fall apart.
Not now. Not here.
"Let me help you," Jericho whispered, sliding his chair closer to mine. His larger hands cupped mine over the glass and I wished I could have felt the warmth they surely offered, "you're probably tired from everything you did today."
I scoffed in response as he lifted the cool glass to my lips. A shiver ran down my spine at the chill of the lemonade flowing down my throat. It was almost unexpected. When I was done, he placed the glass on the table but kept his hand on mine, thumb stroking one of the angry red lines across the back.
"I'm not tired, Jericho," I sounded as bitter as I felt, "and you know it."
"It'll get better," he reassuringly nodded his head.
I wished I could have the positivity he had. It was the one thing we used to have in common. We remained positive not only for ourselves but for each other but now I couldn't help but be pessimistic with the thick gray cloud looming over my head. Right now, him saying things would get better seemed like he was hoping and maybe praying for the impossible because I saw no way for this situation to get better.
"You shouldn't be here worrying about me," I decided to say instead, changing the direction of the conversation. This wasn't something I wanted to spend time talking on. Matter of fact, I wanted to forget today's therapy session even took place, "what have you been working on the entire night. I sometimes wonder if you get any sleep."
"I don't need sleep," Jericho murmured, biting back an amused grin, "and I don't think you want to know what I'm working on."
I leveled him with an incredulous glare, "Don't tell me you're still working on that oracle project of yours. That's illegal," I scanned the people around us before dropping my voice to a whisper, "this is a bad idea and you know it so why still do it? I'm not going to be there to bail you out when this blows up in your face."
"I like to push the limits," he shrugged nonchalantly, "and I'm not going to get caught. Your lack of faith in me wounds me."
"It's not lack of faith when I'm trying to stop you from doing something insane," I deadpanned, clumsily tossing my moonshine blonde hair over my shoulder.
"Don't pretend to be an angel. You may not be on my brother's payroll but you're keeping our family secrets. So don't lecture me," the words may have sounded harsh but his delivery was teasing.
"I'm only keeping my mouth shut for you," I huffed but, the truth was, it was no longer about him. For three years I was roped into his family and I found that I liked Quinn and Miranda. I even liked Miranda's younger sister and Quinn's friend, Priyanka, who I was certain was now dating Quinn's brother.
"Sure, I believe you, Swan," Jericho quipped, curling a tendril of my hair around his index finger and tugging, "you're completely sure you want to meet this guy?"
Raising a perfectly arched eyebrow in his direction, I quizzed, "You don't like Parker much, do you?"
"Hated him the moment he showed me his ugly mug," Jericho said in a voice so low that it vibrated in his chest similar to a growl.
He was an excellent judge of character on most occasions but, most of the time, I just thought he was picky and had too high standards—especially when it came to judging the men that were in my life. Although, he was always spot on about them. Every last one of them turned out to be the assholes he pegged them for.
"I'm starting to think you'll never accept any guy I bring to you, dad," I sarcastically taunted which earned me a glare.
"Shoot me for wanting what's best for you. Tell me you wouldn't do the same," he challenged and I couldn't disagree.
All I wanted was the best for him as well. I wanted him to be happy. To start a family. To live life to the absolute fullest. However, he could only do that if he stopped glaring at a monitor screen all day and night.
"I want you to actually go out there and meet people. Is that too much to ask?"
"Right now," his gaze swept over me in the wheelchair with a grimace, "yeah, I'm going to say it's a bit much to ask, Swan."
"Would you quit calling me that?" I grumbled. Ever since he found out my name he had tied that silly nickname to me.
"It's either that or Princess," Jericho said pointedly, "and princess doesn't suit you."
"And swan does?" I challenged.
"I think it does," he breathed and a flicker of warmth flooded his gaze before clearing.
Sometimes, I forgot how sweet this man could be. Then again, sometimes I forgot that he was no longer a boy. We had both grown and yet when together, it felt like nothing had changed.
"Odette..." A deep, familiar voice drawled from behind.
I stopped breathing and the tiny hairs at the back of my neck rose. Jericho's eyes shot up to the person who stood so close behind me, I could feel his body heat envelop me like a scratchy, uncomfortable blanket. I watched in slow motion as Jericho's face fell, an ugly grimace twisting his lips and furrowing his brows. He was never one to hide what he felt about the people around him and I learned to grow comfortable with him being unable to use a filter.
"If it isn't the boyfriend," Jericho crooned in a saccharine voice, "funny how I haven't seen you. Didn't you care whether or not your girlfriend lived or died for those two weeks?"
Parker chuckled drily, a sound so scary I had the urge to cower away but I shoved that urge down and straightened my spine as he said, "Of course I was but I was recovering myself. Plus, I've just gotten back to work. I've been busy."
"You're never too busy for the people you claim to love," Jericho clipped with a tight smile. He shoved his chair back in the next breath and stood, towering over Parker since he was a head taller, "I'll be outside if you need me, Odette. Take your time, though," he, then, leaned down and brushed his lips over my cheek in a chaste kiss.
The moment Jericho was out of earshot, Parker rounded the table and took a seat across from me. He was a fairly good-looking man with his dark, shaggy hair, long face that held a sharp jar, a slightly crooked nose, and thin lips which were surrounded by a tamed beard.
There was a healing bruise over his forehead and a scar that ran across his left arm. His build was appealing to any woman—not too muscular but not too lanky either—and his olive complexion made him look sun-kissed.
Running his large hand through his tousled locks, he blew out a sharp breath, "Is there a reason you wanted to see me, il mio cigno?"
Two seconds into the conversation and I already wished I could wrap my fingers around his throat, "Don't call me that."
"Why not?" Parker arched an eyebrow with a devilish smirk.
I was once stupid enough to believe that his smirk was attractive, "I'm not your swan!" I hissed because only one person had the right to call me that even if I hated it.
His smirk morphed into a wild, unhinged grin, "We'll see about that."
"You wanted me to help you?" I asked sarcastically with a bite in my words, "but you fucked that up the moment you caused that God damn accident. I'll never get my job back. I'll never get my hands back."
Parker's thick brows shot to his hairline in surprise, "I didn't know the details of your injuries or how extensive they were. The thing is, il mio cigno, I don't necessarily need you. I just need you to get your dad to stop snooping around. The familia won't like it."
"If I knew you were involved in this I would have stayed far away from you," I whisper yelled.
"Your friend," Parker gestured with a nod of his head toward Jericho who leaned against the wall outside the coffee shop we were in, "you know what his family does?"
I kept my mouth shut because I didn't see the need to answer that question.
"Figured," Parker snorted, leaning forward in his seat, "look, I apologize for what happened. It wasn't supposed to go down like that. I really did—" he paused short and shook his head, "do like you. But I can't change the family I'm born into."
"You don't have to be like them," I urged, reaching my hand out to his but I quickly pulled it away when I realized I wouldn't be able to feel him and it was all his fault, "or maybe you're already too much like them."
"I agree, I'm not a cop for the reasons you are. Sure I'm an inside man. But I'm doing this for my family. I joined the academy when I found out a new capo was heading the Mafioso four and a half years ago. I've been trying to keep us in the clear ever since so we wouldn't draw too much attention to ourselves. I'm not going to stop now just because of you."
"Is that why you were so eager to take on that undercover job a few months ago? Where are they going to investigate your family or another?" I questioned while keeping an eye on my surroundings. We didn't need anyone overhearing our conversation.
"It was another," Parker answered with a shrug, "and yes, it was why I wanted in but some stronzo beat me to it."
I licked my dry lips as I readied myself to ask my next question, "How many innocent people have you killed?"
"Come now, I'm not going to reveal my body count," he quipped but his joke fell flat.
"You disgust me," I spat.
"Your boy's brothers aren't any better."
"Yeah, but he's not like them and you know it. It's why you've picked on his family this whole time and not him. You ran a background check on him didn't you?" I didn't wait for a response because the look on his face told me all I needed to know, "and you used your contacts in your family to get whatever else you needed but you couldn't find anything on Jericho, could you?"
"That doesn't change anything," Parker declared with flared nostrils, "and he ran a background check on me too. Just kept it brief. If he goes in-depth he will find out who I am."
"I hope he finds out who you are," I snarled.
"So he could do what?" Parker let out a throaty laugh, "this is a whole different ball game, Odette," he emphasized my name, stressing the T as it rolled off his tongue, "and you're still in it so you better learn the rules fast before something untoward happens to your friend over there. Or worse, to your father. Or, maybe we'll put you out of your misery. Just know, we'll be watching so if you think about turning me in with that little video you have, don't do it."
I tracked Parker's movements as he rose from his seat with a warm smile that was as real as his friendly personality.
"And one more thing," came his taunting voice before leaving, "you tell anyone what you know and bad things will happen. I guarantee it."
Those were his parting words. Words I would recall shortly when bad things did happen as promised.
ODETTE If there was one thing I loved in this world, it was food. And, I loved different types of food. My father had taught me everything I knew about cooking since mom had passed. For someone who worked more than he spent time at home, it surprised me just how many memories I made with him. He made sure to instill every skill I would need to survive in me in case he ever had passed, too.Only, now all those lessons seemed useless. I couldn't cook anymore. Let alone eat, I couldn't pick up a spoon or fork and I definitely couldn't use a knife. The more I tried to do daily tasks, the more I failed at them. I needed help with a bath this morning. Was I embarrassed that my best friend had to help to do such simple tasks? Yes. But he handled them so well and it made my heart ache because it only proved what a gem of a person he was.He didn't look down on me or treat me differ
JERICHOI watched Odette from where I sat. Her features were grimly twisted, teeth grating against each other, and brows furrowed in concentration. The nurse that was with her gave her an encouraging smile but Odette didn't return it. The smile only seemed to irritate her more.My attention dropped to the red stress ball in her hand. The nurse had instructed her to squeeze the ball as hard as she could but her fingers weren't cooperating. They trembled and barely moved no matter how much effort she put into it. Her fingers curled around the ball with no pressure added but the nurse seemed happy with the little Odette had done.She would be removing the cast on her leg later this week which meant she could start strengthening her leg to walk again. To me and the rest of the doctors and nurses here, she was making progress. Excellent progress even. To her, she wasn't.Odet
ODETTE I snuggled deeper into the couch with my head on Quinn's lap and my legs propped onto a pillow. Her nimble fingers weaved through my hair before massaging into my temples. I watched from where I lay as Miranda did Priyanka's nails and Tory stuffed her face with popcorn which Quinn had made earlier—her eyes were glued to the tv screen as she watched some kind of thriller movie. Jericho hadn't returned yet. He had left earlier and must have found his brothers because none of them had dropped by. It was strange. We all had running bets on which brother would barge into the door first suffering from withdrawals. My money was on Ace and so was Tory and Miranda's. Priyanka and Quinn had their money on Gunnar. I guess we all knew that Jericho was the only sane one in the lot. It felt nice to be with the girls. I
JERICHO "It feels good to finally be walking on my two feet," Odette grinned down at me as she rotated her ankle clockwise and then anti-clockwise, working the muscle and the bone. It had been two weeks since her cast was removed and things were going smoothly. I even noticed some sort of spark flare back to life in her eyes. It warmed my heart to know that she was finally getting out of her routine. She no longer sat caged in her room all day. In the mornings she would go on a walk around the block to strengthen her leg and in the afternoon she would walk Slash. Admittedly, I was scared that with all the progress she was making, she would want to leave and head home. Only, her hands still needed so much work. I leaned back on the couch and tossed the tv remote onto the coffee table, "Told you my swan would finally get her wings back. You should trust me more often."Her button nose crinkled in amusement—something I always found adorable, "Sweety, you sound a little too cocky ther
ODETTEI curled my fingers around the stress ball and was happy when they moved by even an inch. It had been another week and I had been going to physiotherapy every day since I had that weird moment with Jericho. We had shared a few words here and there but almost never more than one sentence at a time. It was becoming uncomfortable to stay in the house with him especially when we bumped into each other constantly. With me being able to walk again it meant that I was more active at home. Sometimes I just went on a walk to avoid Jericho completely. I had a plan though, as soon as I was done with my session today I would tell him that would be able to go home.I knew he wouldn't like it but, at the end of the day, he needed to understand that I was no damsel in distress. He may have regarded me as his swan but I was not fragile even with my hands unable to move I could still fend for myself. I didn't like the awkward tension between us. It wasn't something that I expected but it was som
JERICHOI expelled a sharp breath and pivoted around my bedroom at the Astor mansion. Gunnar had called me this morning and suggested I start packing up everything I wanted. However, I didn't know where to begin. So far, I had three empty piles: Throw, keep, and donate. If I had a choice, though, I'd have kept everything in the room. To both my brother's these halls were haunted. They had been this way for a while. Haunted with memories and sadness so destructive it could probably rip their sanity to shreds. It was a wonder how either of them still came home at night and lived in this place. To me, it was the only thing I had connecting me to my parents. Parents I wished I knew longer. I wished I had the privilege of having my mother fuss over me on graduation day and hearing my dad tell me how proud of my achievements he was. I'd never get that. Instead, I got Gunnar who fussed over me the way mom would. He made sure I was dressed to take over the world that day. And Ace was the on
ODETTEI sat on the barstool with my back pressed against the kitchen island. Gunnar looked like a raging bull with his nostrils flared in anger. He was doing his best to stay calm, breathing in through his nose and expelling harsh breaths through his mouth. Before Quinn came into his life—according to Jericho—Gunnar had serious issues when it came to controlling his anger. Now, he was better at it but I wouldn't go as far as calling him a timid, changed man. There were times, like this instance, when his anger got the best of him. But, it wasn't just anger. He used that as a base emotion to cover up everything else he felt. I watched him from where I sat with Jericho standing between Gunnar and myself as a barrier. Usually, I would insist that I didn't need Jericho to place himself as a sounding board between me and his brothers but this situation was different. This was a sensitive topic for all three Astor brothers and I knew this. That was why I kept it away from them. But things
ODETTE"Get dressed, we're going out," excitement rolled off Jericho in waves. He came barging into my room with this gleam in his eyes that I hadn't seen in ages and a smile so wide I was certain it would split his face into two parts. The one thing I had learned over the years of knowing Jericho, was that his excitement was not only palpable but it was contagious. He was an enigma and it was impossible not to feel what he felt. I was grateful that he hadn't hardened to the world around him the way his brothers had. He allowed himself to feel and absorb the emotions of others and himself. His excitement crashed into me, sinking into every crevice of my body until I could feel it buzzing through my veins. It had excitement of my own brewing at the base of my stomach. I couldn't remember when last I actually felt excited about anything so this new emotion after so many dull days was welcomed. It was the splash of color I needed when everything around me was gray and bland. I placed
ODETTE One week. For one week I refused to leave Jericho's beside unless I had to. I couldn't keep food down but I forced myself to try because, I knew when he finally woke up, he wouldn't be pleased with seeing how much weight I had lost in just a handful of days. He would wake up, though. He had to.I needed him. It sounded strange to place so much importance on any single individual. To love someone was to give them a part of your heart knowing it would be a part you could never get back. They would take that piece of you into the afterlife if they departed, allowing you to wither away as a result of their loss. Because, without them, you were incomplete. Jericho was the sun in my solar system. He was the anchor. Bursts of warmth and mirth only existed when I orbited him. Without him, I was cold and desolate, aimlessly floating around space with no tether. He was my best friend. He was every word. He was every sentence. He was every line. He was everything. To love someone so
JERICHO Time had no essence. It slipped and spilled. It ticked and rolled. From one moment into the next torturous moment. My will to live dwindled and the thread of life I grasped now sat at the edge of my fingertips. I wasn't sure how much time passed but once the torturing started, I stopped caring. The pain had me retreating into the darkest corners of my mind and yet, solace and silence still evaded me. I shifted in and out of lucidity as gruesome, unspeakable acts were performed on my body. The fowl, metallic stench of blood permeated the air, and my screams and pleas caused a dull ringing in my ears. Hatred danced across my tongue with bile as its partner and my heart playing a hazardous rhythm. Echoes of agony rattled my bones. I sat, chained to this chair with no means to fight back. My kneecaps had been shattered, fingers broken, hair pulled out, nearly drowned, flesh carved from my body, and when I lost consciousness, they brought me back to repeat it all over again. I ha
ODETTE"What do you mean?" Anger flashed like a hot, searing beam of light against my vision, causing tears too well to ease the burn, "I haven't been gone for more than seventy-two hours and something bad has already happened?"Gunnar's hard voice drifted into the receiver of the encrypted burner phone Ace had prohibited me from using. Shuffling sounded in the background before a string of muffled curses followed, "I'm at his apartment. He called me and I told him I'd meet him when I landed. He never answered any of my phone calls after that. I came straight here after I landed. Everything in his apartment is thoroughly destroyed."My irritation fizzled and popped in my eardrums, like the pressure experienced at high altitude, while my blood thrummed and heart pounded like a war drum against my ribcage, "How long ago did you last speak to him?" My tone may have seeped out of me leveled and cool but my hands quivered as they wiped away my silent tears. The scars caught and held my at
JERICHOI awoke chained to a chair. The warmth of a low-hung light bulb had sweat beading over my forehead, rolling down until it burned my eyes. I was dragged from my bed and knocked unconscious. Those were the last memories I had. Now, I was God only knew where with no one to find me. The heated steel ring on my index finger burned. If Gunnar figured out I was missing, he could track the ring. I just needed to buy myself time. There was no point in him plotting my rescue if I was no longer alive. He would just end up walking into a trap. Maybe that was the point. Maybe Eddie wanted Gunnar to find me, and walk into this trap so he could eliminate us both. The thought had a wave of adrenaline surging through my veins. I struggled against the chains which bound my wrists, tugged until they rubbed my flesh raw and a shot of pain zapped through my tense muscles like a bolt of lightning. The hiss that fled through my clenched molars echoed off the concrete walls. A chill passed in the
JERICHO I scrubbed a hand down my face, scratching the stubble coating my jaw as my eyes skimmed over lines and lines of unintelligible scrawl. If the book wasn't written in a code I couldn't crack, it was also written in scrawl only a doctor could probably decipher. Then it hit me. What if this section of the book I was unraveling wasn't written in code at all? What if this was some type of medical note? It would explain so many things. It was a long shot but I knew Gunnar would have someone on his team able to make sense of the lines which seemed to blend into one another. The quicker I could get the information we needed, the quicker I could get Odette back. Admitting my love for her was one of the scariest and bravest things I could have ever done. I may not have been wired like my brothers. Violence was not my first solution to every problem. And yet, the thought of firing a gun and settling a bullet between two eyes wasn't as disconcerting as admitting my love for Odette. W
ODETTEAfter a close to eighteen-hour flight with two stops in between—one of which Gunnar had made, we landed in South Africa, in the province of KwaZulu-Natal. We were hauled up in a hotel room near the beach. The city we were staying in—from the little I had seen—was beautiful. Durban seemed to be filled with people of different races and ethnicity. It was different from what I had expected. Then again, I didn't know what to expect when Ace said we were going to a safe house. All I knew was that we wouldn't be staying at this hotel for very long. Even with the ocean view with golden sands and the warm, yellow glow of the sun shimmering off the waves or the salty sea breeze which carried an array of aromas from the restaurants lining this stretch of road, I couldn't truly enjoy the experience. One: I was running away and hiding from dangerous men trying to kill me. The thought gnawed restlessly at the back of my mind no matter how much I tried to stifle it. Two: Jericho, my best fr
ODETTE"Do you need anything else?" Ace asked as he stood in the center of my loft-style apartment. I gave the small place a once over. It had been ages since I had been here. Everything had collected a thick layer of dust. A double bed sat at the furthest end of the room with green—the color of Jericho's eyes—nets around it. When I had bought the nets I remembered thinking of him. It was a green that was difficult to come by so I made sure to grab them.More toward the center was a sleeper couch with two single sofas on each side. My television was mounted on the wall to save space. I had a kitchenette through a door on the left and a bathroom through the door on the right—equally as small. It wasn't much but it was home. It was what I could afford on a cop's salary and I was happy with it. "I don't think so," I murmured dejectedly. After I argued with Jericho, the bubble of elation that cocooned me had burst. I felt like a drug addict suffering from severe withdrawals, aching for
ODETTEJericho set me down and gestured to our clothes sprawled over the floor, "Put something on," he said as he shrugged on his boxers and grabbed a hair tie from the pedestal to prop his hair into a top knot. A grimace twisted his handsome features when he noted the coffee which had spilled when he had been straddling me on the bed, fucking my breasts and mouth, "I'm sorry. I know you were proud of making that and I'm proud of you for doing it all on your own with no assistance required. I'll clean it up.""It's okay," my cheeks heated as blood pooled beneath the thin veil of skin, "I have no complaints."He closed the space between us, gripping the back of my neck and sealing his mouth against mine with a searing kiss, "Good because I have none either."The knock sounded again, louder as if the person was trying the punch a hole into the door. A low, annoyed growl rumbled at the back of Jericho's throat. It was such a sexy sound that shot right through me like a lethal bullet to
ODETTEThere was a bounce in my step and a glow in my face which was not there yesterday. It was surprising how one action, one night, could change so much about a person. The smile marking my face was unflinching and, although my muscles pained from being set in the same position for so long, I found I liked having it light up my face. It made me look years younger, like a giddy teenage girl who had just discovered what love was for the first time. I laughed lightly to myself, shaking my head at my own thoughts as I gripped the handle of the coffee pot as firmly as I could. My hands ached after clawing at Jericho's back most of the night for stability as I trembled beneath him. He liked it. Practically begged for it. The coffee pot shook as I lifted it out of its holster causing me to close my fingers around the handle tighter. Determination had my brows scrunching together and my mouth pinching in a thin line. I had a lot more reasons to want to be better now, even if I couldn't b