Realization

"I earnestly regret the day you came into my life," he said with a tone of finality. His voice was calm but the anger in his eyes and the way his jaw ticked told a different story.

Her voice faltered for a bit. "What...did you say, Henry?” he had dealt with her patiently up until now, it seemed like his patience was thinning. She was shocked to hear those words from him.

“I was as clear as day Angie. You are a terrible person, you always have been...” he shook his head. “No...you are way beyond terrible. I have tried my best to treat you right, I have given you everything you ever wanted. You have never lacked. I am married to you because I am in love with you...”

"And what does that matter?” she asked.

He shook his head, “It doesn’t, does it?”

“Yes because you’re not making any sense...”

“What is not making sense is you!” he interjected, “It is us!” He pointed between them, “This! Whatever it is we have.”

“I am asking you to get me a new phone to replace the one you smashed on the floor and you are listing everything you have done for me, what has that got to do with anything? Talking about how you married me because you loved me? Of course shouldn’t you be in love with me? You are talking like you are doing me a favour being in love with me Henry...”

Henry sighed, to say he was exhausted with their back-and-forth arguments was putting it lightly. “Do as you please Angela. I can not deal with this any longer...” he proceeded to walk out of the room.

"Where are you going? she called after him, “You should call them before leaving", she shouted, she was solely concerned about her phone. Everything they had argued about meant nothing to her.

"I am sure you have a lot of money you should get the phone for yourself, since it is more important than your son you just gave birth to” he shook his head, I do not care about how you treat me...but for goodness sake your child...”

“Henry enough with all your guilt-tripping, if you care so much about your child maybe take care of him yourself"

“He is our child Angela! Ours!” he screamed. “You just gave birth to him days ago, are you forgetting that?”

“I clearly said I do not want him!”

Henry was on the verge of breaking down. “How can you not want your child?” he couldn’t imagine his child having to go through the trauma of being unwanted and unloved. He came to sit beside her. “Tell me Angela what the problem is? What is it? I’ll fix it. You can not abandon your child. We are a married couple it’s our duty to care...”

“You want to know what the problem is?” she inquired.

He nodded.

“So you can fix it?”

“Yes Angela, I want us to address our issues, whatever these issues are"

“How about you start with getting me a new phone”

He sighed, “I am talking about issues affecting our marriage"

"Then fuck you Henry" she flashed him a middle finger.

Henry turned around and then left the room, even more, exhausted than he was earlier. Angela stared furiously at his retreating as he exited the room. She folded her arms across her chest and glared in the direction of the door the man took. If her eyes were lasers she would have bore holes through the door.

He took a short walk down the long corridors. He couldn't bear to be in the same space with Angela any longer. He stopped at a large window and peered through it. He was overlooking a very beautiful garden. The view was exhilarating. He tried to drown out the words Angela said in the course of their arguments. He refused to let anything bother him and instead chose to concentrate on his beautiful son. He exhaled deeply and went to the special nursery where he had asked his baby to be taken to check on him. At this point, nothing else mattered more than his son.

***

"Where is my baby?” he asked a nurse that was in the baby's nursery. The nursemaid he handed the baby to was unavailable. She greeted him. "Nurse Deborah and Doctor Grey are with the baby in the diaper room,” she said to him while pointing at a little room attached to the main one.

"Thank you" He walked to the room she had pointed out and then he saw his baby being changed. He calmed down immediately after seeing his son. He felt something stir inside of him at the sight of his son. It was a peaceful feeling, overwhelming, he almost teared up. The ugly fight he had gotten into with his wife was long forgotten. He had to bear everything, even more, because of his child. The doctor and the nurse saw him peering from the slightly ajar door and stopped what they were doing instantly and acknowledged his presence.

"Why are you changing his clothes? Is everything okay?" he questioned them as he entered the room. “He was fine when I handed him over to the nurse. Is he...” he trailed off. It wasn't easy being a new father, many times he had no clue what he was doing. It didn’t help that his wife was being uncooperative. He turned to look the doctor squarely in the face to whom the unasked question was directed his hands were in the pockets of his expensive suit.

“It is nothing to be worried about sir" the doctor responded, “It is a trivial issue...”

“What happened to my son?"

The doctor’s heart was pounding steadily in his chest, there was something very intimidating about Mr Allen. He Had an aura about him. It didn’t matter that he dealt with him many times in the past before now he always felt overwhelmed by his presence. Now that it concerned his son, he had to be extra careful with him.

“Nurse Deborah spilt baby food on his dress while he was feeding, just a speck, nothing to be alarmed about."

Henry stared at the both of them, they looked jittery, like they would run off any moment if they could. He realised they were scared of him. He didn’t want that, especially not when they were in charge of caring for his son.

The moments that passed before Henry replied to Grey felt like aeons when it was barely a minute. It was torturous for him. He wished the ground would open up and swallow him.

“You should be careful," Henry said simply.

They both nodded and mumbled their apologies. He watched them fumble around trying to dress him up.

“The onesie looks kind of small to me” he observed.

"I think it is just the perfect size Mr Allen” Nurse Deborah responded.

He nodded, “Can I hold my son, please? When you’re done that is...”

Doctor Grey nodded, and he handed over the baby to him. “Of course, Mr Allen. Here is your son."

“His name is Asher” Henry replied. He had picked a name for their son before he was born, of course, he had tried discussing it with Angela but she had made it clear she didn’t care enough from the onset. He took him from the doctor and held him close to his chest. He peered closely at the customized onesies that he had specially prepared for him. On it was written, ‘Mummy and Daddy’s boy'. It was done by the designers who designed his clothing lines.

"It's the perfect size for him, Mr Allen. You don't need to worry about it" The nurse tried to allay his worries with a small smile on her face while adjusting the baby blanket. It was a bit chilly.

“You’re the experts, if you say so then I agree" Henry responded, he knew he was worrying too much about unnecessary things but he couldn’t help it. He had looked forward to the arrival of his son. He was confident he would be loved and thoroughly cared for. Now that he was here and in his arms, with all that was happening, he was scared of making any mistakes. He wanted to do this right by all means. “Hope the baby formula would suffice in place of...” he trailed off. The unspoken words hung in the air.

Doctor Grey nodded in understanding, "It is the best that is available and highly nutritious.”

"Good” he nodded approvingly. “You will continue to feed him with that.”

"Breast milk is however more nutritious and it would be wise to take it alongside the...” he trailed off immediately when saw Henry’s changed expression.

Henry saw how Grey looked at him and he knew exactly what he was thinking. He had never discussed the issue of Angela breastfeeding their child with him before but he took the hint. Knowing that Angela was doing well after giving birth, he like every other person had expected she would be breastfeeding Asher and not feeding him with baby formula. Henry was displeased with it, he only wanted the best for his child. The mere thought that Asher could be malnourished because of his mother’s sheer wickedness did not sit right with him.

He cleared his throat "No, he won't be getting breastmilk Feed him well with the formula only."

"Yes, Mr Allen" Doctor Grey was quick to answer with his head bowed.

"You may leave now. I would like to be alone with my son. Remember to check on him at intervals, ensure my son is well cared for and looked after.”

"Yes, Mr Allen" They replied in unison. They left the baby's nursery, leaving him alone with his child. The room became still, you could hear a pin drop, the nursery was situated away from the boisterous part of the hospital. He had picked a much larger and private nursery for his son. It was one of the perks of owning more than half of the hospital’s shares. He stared at his baby, his finger lightly caressing his soft and beautiful face. He watched as his lashes fluttered open, It was such a beautiful sight to behold.

“I realised we haven’t had a lot of time to talk Asher and I apologize for it" he began. “Your father has been caught up with a lot of things he hasn’t even had the time to properly welcome you...” he smiled. “First off Welcome baby Asher, welcome my son. I am so glad that you’re here" he said lovingly all the while staring at his large grey eyes. “Secondly I am sorry I haven’t spent a lot of time with you. I know it is difficult getting used to different people coming over to care for you, that is not what your daddy wants and I will correct that soon.”

He sat down on a chair. “There’s just a lot going on with Mom and we are going to resolve it soonest. We are going to figure it out, I promise you, son. We are buddies after all, aren’t we?”

Asher let out a small noise, and Henry’s laughter reverberated through his chest. “Of course, you agree. See we are already bonding."

He kissed Asher's forehead and rocked him happily while standing close to his luxurious crib. An off-white crib with a touch of blue. It was so beautifully crafted. Henry had it specially done for his baby before his arrival. He sang lullabies he had learnt waiting for his arrival to him and hoped they sounded beautiful to Asher, he realised they weren’t, and when Asher began to cry, he tried to comfort. It took him a longer time than he imagined for Asher to quiet down. He was going to figure this out somehow, no matter how long it took. With or without Angela.