MaraI stare into my mate's onyx eyes. He opened himself to me. Showed me a vulnerable side no one ever gets to see. He trusted me enough to reveal that part of himself, and it had to take a lot of courage for him to let his guard down like that.The least I can do, is give him that same kind of trust.His hands linger on my waist, not pushing, not pulling, just waiting. “Can you tell me what you want?” he asks after a while.I want to do that so badly, but I can’t. I don’t know how. No one ever cared enough to ask me, so I never learned.He cocks his head at me and smiles. It’s like he knows that I can’t say the words. This must be so frustrating for him. Having a sexually anorexic mate who swallows her tongue when he needs her to open her fucking mouth and speak.But he doesn’t seem to mind.“Can I show you then?” he asks, his voice low and soothing. "Tell you what to do?"Numb and mute, I can only nod.His thumbs trace slow circles around my hips, grounding me in the moment, letting
JohnathanI’m actually impressed by my own level of control and patience with Mara. There’s a reason why I never chose to sleep with virgins, or inexperienced women in general, in the past. They require too much patience - a quality I mostly lack when it comes to sex.But Mara is my mate. She’s special. She’s not just another cum receptacle or a temporary body to warm my bed or company to keep my loneliness at bay.She is my mate. And the memory of her previous mate is still too fresh in her mind. I have to keep reminding myself to be gentle. To be patient.I thought it would annoy me, it usually does, but it’s the opposite. Slowing down, forcing me to concentrate on her and what she needs, grounds me, connects me to her.I settle between her legs and look up at her flushed face. Even though I’ve known it for a few weeks now, even though I marked her, her presence, her very existence, still feels fantastical and impossible.Yet here she is. Lying under me. Beautiful and vulnerable, tr
Johnathan I crawl up Mara’s body to kiss her. Her skin is flushed, and her chest is still racing. She looks at me with eyes that are filled with shock and awe. “I never…” she starts. “I didn’t… it has never-” “Shh,” I silence her. "I know. You don't have to explain anything." I press my mouth against hers, and she moans softly when she tastes herself on my lips. She reaches between our bodies for my cock, but I quickly break away from her and grab her hand. “No.” A small frown creases her brow. “Don’t you want me?” “I do,” I say. “That’s the problem.” “But… why?” Her heart is beating way too fast, and even though she’s blushing and shy to ask the questions, she forges ahead. “Why is it a problem that you want your mate?” I chuckle softly and plant a soft kiss right above her eyebrow. “I promised you that tonight is all about you. We are going to keep it that way.” “What if I want more?” “I will give you all the orgasms you want, Mara, but I’m not fucking you. Not tonight.” He
Mara I expected to feel different. Used. Dirty and filled with shame - like I always did after Lucas was done with me. I feel none of those things. Johnathan was rough, but in a different way. He cared about me, and Lucas never did. He’s still caring for me now. He went down to the kitchen to get food and water, then came back to bed, making sure that I ate and drank before he pulled me into his arms and just held me. “How many women have you been with?” I ask. It’s mostly curiosity, but there’s a hint of jealousy in my question that I can’t deny. “Less than you probably think,” he says. “And more than you imagine. It’s lonely, you know… the rogue life. And then you become the Alpha of a pack, and you think it will be better. You have a pack now, and you won't be so lonely anymore. But it’s worse. “You are the leader, not just another member of the pack. People use you. They want things from you. Women throw themselves at you, hoping to become your next Luna. You can’t trust any
JohnathanI head in the general direction of the fae territory, sure that I’ll come across Oberon at any moment, but it’s Hakon and what’s left of his pack that I find first. “Where are you, you bastard,” the Alpha hollers. “Bring her back to me.”I turn to Hakon’s Beta who is staring at his Alpha in disbelief. “What is he doing?” the Beta asks me. “Is it this place? We’re not supposed to be here, so the Goddess cursed us?”“No,” I answer with a sigh.As we watch, Hakon scrambles to his feet and runs full-tilt at the fae forest, but he can't break through the magical barrier the fae put up to protect themselves. I’ve passed through the barrier many times, so I know how strong that magic is. He is going to kill himself.“Our Alpha lost his mind,” one of the wolves says. If I don’t do something right now, Hakon is going to destroy himself. “Alpha!” I snap. “What are you doing?”“The fae captured my mate.” He runs head-first into the invisible barrier and bounces back like a rubber ball
Mara I can’t sleep. The heat is stifling, even with the windows open, and I’ve grown used to being outside at night, training with Kahn. I'm wide awake and deeply frustrated. After a while, I get out of bed, dress in a tank top and pair of shorts, and go down to the pool. The dark water is inviting tonight, and without thinking much about it, I slide into the luke-warm pool. There’s something peaceful about floating on the water, staring up at the magnificent night sky. I feel like I’m ensconced in the womb. Warm. Safe. In a place where no one can reach me and harm me. There’s no pollution out here. I thought the heavens at Red Ridge were beautiful, but no matter how much my father tried to run a clean facility, it still polluted our air and the stars were never as bright as they are here. I wouldn't mind floating here until the moon sets and the sun rises. “Luna!” Chad calls out. Disturbed and annoyed by the butler's intrusion, I drop my feet and lower them to the bottom of the
MaraPreston stares at the glowing flowers, his mouth slightly agape. “I have never seen this.”“Yeah. If it helps you at all, Johnathan grew up here, and he didn’t see it until he came back.”“Right, right,” the Beta mumbles. “So you want me to do what?”“There’s this hole.” I crouch next to the entrance. “You have to go through it. Grab the pyramid stone on the other side, it will suck you in.”“Suck me in?” he asks, still dumbfounded.The moon is starting to dip below the horizon and the night sky is slowly turning from black to a light bluish-pink. “Yes. Just hurry up and do it.”“What… what will happen to me?”I don’t know. Johnathan spoke about horrible punishments if the unchosen tried to go through. And am I supposed to follow Preston? Does it only work if another Lycan takes him into the temple? Kahn took Johnathan, and Johnathan took me.“Mara!” Preston snaps. “What will happen to me?”“You’ll be turned.”“Into what?” he asks, his voice rising in panic.“A Lycan. Just do it.
Johnathan I didn't have to work too hard to convince Felicity to take Rose off my hands. She gave the girl a quick once over and declared. “You will stay in the night caves with us. We need a good day servant.” I cringed. That was not how I treated children, but I had very little choice left. Rose forced my hand. She hadn’t even been here two days yet, and she already started to wreak havoc. I gave it another week before my town resembled a war zone as the Alphas started to go to war over her. “How will you keep her contained?” I ask. “During the day.” Felicity winked at me. “Our familiars have all the power of vampires and none of our weaknesses. They can walk during the day and don’t crave blood.” “I kill them,” Rose said and jutted out her chin. "My magic strong." I expected Felicity to discipline the girl in some way, but the vampire only smiled indulgently. “You’re not the first of your kind that have crossed my path. Our familiars are under our control. You can't seduce the
MaraOberon does that thing where he makes food disappear out of thin air and sits back while I eat. He helps himself to some of the food, but not as much as I do. He nibbles on little bits here and there, but he's mostly focused on me, making sure that I eat.The honeyed wine is exquisite, and while I drink way too much of it, I don’t feel drunk. Just very, very relaxed. “How long will Johnathan be?” I ask Oberon.I enjoy this place, but I know the fae doesn’t like it when people intrude in their forests for too long. They prefer the solitude and comfort of their own kind. I'm a trespasser on their sacred lands.“A while longer,” Oberon answers. “I thought you and I might talk about some things while we wait. Johnathan made a mistake, sending you to the Lunae. They have no interest in helping you.”“I know. They want to use me. My power.”Oberon nods. “Indeed. You have to understand… Johnathan did not act maliciously. He truly wants to help you.”“He can’t.”“He can. If you would onl
MaraUnlike the church, the hotel is absolutely chaotic. The energy in here is stifling, oppressive, and I want to turn right back around and leave this place.Johnathan was wrong. They are not my people. They never were, and they never will be.The hotel has more than fifty rooms, and space for several hundred guests, but Johnathan gave the hotel to the Lunae to use exclusively. My mate is paying for the use of this place, so the owner of the hotel doesn’t have to shoulder the financial burden.As far as I can tell, The Lunae picked out their own suites - the best rooms the hotel has to offer - and they’re still not happy. They want free run of the town.More came in during the night, and I counted twenty Lunae as I made my way through the hotel, looking for Rose. Johnathan posted six Alpha males in the hotel to guard over the women. All of them look miserable. They are wearing their charms, but the Lunae, especially the younger ones, relentlessly hit on them.I stop next to an Alph
MaraWe step into the cool, dark church. I’ve been in human churches before, and always found them comforting and peaceful. There’s something about the candles and quiet that soothes me."Patrick!" Johnathan calls out."I don't think he's here," I say, smiling as my voice echoes in the empty church."He's here. He's always here. He lives here with his wife.""He has a wife?" I ask, surprised."Yes, he-"My mate stops talking when the priests steps through a door in the back of the church, and comes straight for us. “Johnathan,” he says when he reaches us, and gives my mate a big smile. “To what do I owe this unexpected pleasure? Did you come to give your life to the Lord?”I’ve never heard anyone call my mate by his first name. It’s strange. But Johnathan is completely unperturbed. He just chuckles at the priest’s remark. “Patrick,” he says. “I need to use your church to shelter some of the incoming wolves.”The priest’s eyes flick over to me. His bright grey eyes are lively and pier
JohnathanThe town is crawling with people. There are a lot more people than I expected to find, and I have no idea how the hell we’re supposed to sort them all out. There are so many that their auras blend together, and I can’t tell who is Omega and who is Alpha.It is absolute pandemonium.My Lycans and Alphas try their best to control the crowd, but the sheer number of wolves makes it impossible.I walk up to a Gamma, Jeremy, the one I met in the woods of Red Ridge. “Could you do a headcount?” I ask.The Gamma shakes his head. He’s covered in sweat, and exhausted. The poor man is seconds away from losing his shit completely. “Rhoda is trying to take down names.”Mara’s hand slips from mine and she disappears into the crowd. I stop myself before I can call out to her. The wolves need to respect her as their queen, as much as they respect me. It ultimately doesn't matter. She's not far, and I can feel her anyway - her quiet resignation - as she heads in Rhoda’s direction.I put my th
JohnathanUpon seeing my reaction, Mara quickly starts to raise her defences again. I grab her wrist to get her attention. “Don’t.”“I told you-”“I’m fine. It was just very sudden. Give me a little warning next time.”She stops what she’s doing and settles back in her seat. The pack house comes into view as we round the last corner, and I let out a little sigh of relief. I want some time with my mate before I tackle the next crisis.I know I have to go down to the town to figure out this mess with the accommodations, but I’m absolutely not leaving Mara here by herself. The state she’s in scares me - she’s bound to do something to herself - but I have to convince her to come with me.“Quick shower,” I say as Baxter pulls up to the front door. “Then we’ll go into town.”“You want me to go with you?” Mara asks.“Yes,” I say and switch over to our mind link. “More time together, remember?”“You’ll be busy. I’ll just get in the way.”“Fuck’s sake Mara, you are never in the way. Stop beati
JohnathanI did not sense Mara’s approach until she started running towards me. It was sudden. Like a balloon popping. Oberon brought her to me. She’s in a terrible state, but trying her best to put up a brave front. Things haven’t exactly been going her way lately. Or at all really. It's been one clusterfuck after the other since we mated.It’s my natural instinct to protect her. I want to fix everything for her. I want to wrap her in cotton and put her in a glass case. Safe and snug. I’ll burn this whole damn world to the ground if that’s what it takes to see her smile. But intellectually I know how stifling that kind of union can be. I've seen men with the purest intentions crush their mates under the weight of their protection.As far as I’m concerned, It’s just another form of abuse and control. I make sure that she stays well out of the way as we put up the barriers, and when we take a break to drink some water, I stand by her side, telling her about the floods we can expect.
MaraThe morning is darker than usual. The clouds are so full of rain that they are almost black. I can feel the electricity in the air, nature holding her breath as she awaits the inevitable release.Usually Kahn is somewhere around the pack house, but today he’s nowhere to be found. Day or night, unless he’s feeding, he’s here. He’ll come inside when the sun is highest, but that’s about as much as he hides from the day.I don’t think he ever sleeps. He tells me he does, but I am sure he’s lying. Vampires go into a dead state during the day - their hearts stop beating and they don’t breathe - but Kahn being half-Lycan never reaches that state.It must be awful to go through life like that. Never sleeping, watching time pass by, the people you love moving on without you. A part of nothing, fitting nowhere. All alone for all eternity.“Kahn?” I ask for the tenth time, feeling tears well up in my eyes. "Where are you?"He doesn’t answer me.I try to mind link with him, but can’t. It’s l
JohnathanThe morning comes too soon. It feels as if I barely closed my eyes before the morning alarm woke me.I really need to switch those fucking things off. They're not doing their job anymore, and they are more annoying that comforting now.I’m dreading this day. Not only do I have to sit back and watch as my exhausted mate go to Oberon for training, I need to break the bad news about Felicity to Kahn, close the town, and see to the new blow-ins that arrived overnight.We have officially run out of space, and there’s nowhere I can put the newcomers, unless I use the empty school, our one Christian church, and the brothels. No one’s going to like any of that. Not Joseph, the brothel madams, or the human priest who made this place his home after finding out that he was fated to a werewolf. The priest told me his story in vivid detail. How he tried to ignore the pull of the mate bond because human priests aren’t allowed to take wives for some reason. In the end, he couldn’t withst
JohnathanMara falls asleep on my lap, curled up like a cat, her face buried in my chest, hand fisted around my shirt.It’s not a peaceful sleep. Kahn asked me about my first kill - and it was true that I didn’t feel guilty about that one. It was pure self-defence. If anything, I was proud of myself for overpowering a fully grown werewolf with experience.But there have been others since then. And they do haunt me from time to time. All of them deserved it to some degree, but that doesn’t make it any less painful. Ally visits me often in my dreams. I keep reliving that moment just before she died. That split-second when she was sane and simply asked, “Why?”I didn’t have a chance to answer her question. I hope she knows that I didn’t want to do it, that I regret it almost every day of my life.I get up, holding Mara close to me, and go upstairs. I lay her on the bed and open the windows to let the cool, rainy breeze in.My mate moans softly in her sleep and flops over on her stomach.