(Lily's POV)
The rain started pouring suddenly, like the cloud couldn't hold it anymore; it didn't even leave a sign that it was going to happen. The water was dropping so heavily, and I stood drenched in the lobby, rainwater pooling around my feet as the storm outside seemed to seep into the very space around me, the sound of raindrops pounding against the roof and walls a deafening accompaniment to my own ragged breathing. The water around my feet was so cold that I was starting to shiver, and my legs, exposed to the cold rainwater, made my body give a cold shock response, which started to make me have goosebumps, and the heavier the rain gets, the colder its water is. The day was supposed to be quite a good day. But then there was him who is the actual determiner of it. In class today, he barely looked at me; his eyes kept scanning the whole room like i wasn't even there. "Lily, why does that even bother you?" I asked myself. His job is primarily to lecture us on philosophy, and philosophy only. It's normal for him to focus on everyone knowing is following or not. It shouldn't have bothered me—it was normal—it was professional, but it did. I hate the whole of this, I hate the fact that it did bother me; i hate to the extent that it did, but I'm really bothered by it. At this point, I can't even deny that I'm lost in it, I'm lost in him. I'm completely helpless and there's nothing I can't do to help. I rarely fight back the feelings like I used to do because it really is, and the more I try to fight back the feelings, the more it shows its authenticity. Even though he wasn't focused on me, I was still head over heels for him. The way he leaned against the podium, his smooth and commanding voice—it was impossible to ignore. When he rolled up his shirt sleeves, I was completely gone. And when his eyes met mine, it felt like he saw something he always wanted to. I always tried to put an end to this attraction, but I guess it's beyond my power, I just cannot. "I came here to learn, to prove myself—not to become some livestock over a man who didn't see me as anything more than a mere student," I said to myself. It felt like I'm a loop, because I'm always repeating this cycle. Every time I thought I'd get home out of my head, something would pull him right back in—a memory, a fleeting glance, even the sound of his just might just play in my head again. Sometimes it's not even just the excitement the attraction brings; it comes with guilt. He trusted me as a student, but I'm here fantasizing about every thing that crosses my mind. I thought about everything very quickly. It made me forget the outside world and I only remember where I was after I managed to come out of my illusion. The rain's still there, falling heavily. My feet are now very cold. I was contemplating if I should leave or wait longer. It keeps getting heavier, and it looks like it wasn't coming to an end anytime soon. It's so cold. The rain seemed endless, the cold getting more unbearable. I couldn't wait any longer, I just knew it had to leave. I stepped out of the lobby and now into the heavy neverending rain, as soon as I was in it, the rain hit me like a ton of bricks. The droplets feel like needles on my skin, stinging and cold. I blink rapidly, trying to clear my vision, but the rain is relentless. My clothes are instantly soaked, clinging to my body like a cold, wet shroud. The fabric weighs me down, making every step feel like a struggle. My shoes squelch with each step, water seeping in and making my feet feel like ice. The rain drums against my ears, a deafening roar that makes it hard to hear anything else. I feel disoriented, like I'm in a washing machine on a spin cycle. My skin starts to prickle with goosebumps, and I can feel my body temperature dropping rapidly. My teeth chatter, and I wrap my arms around myself, trying to conserve what little body heat I have left. I was already having a severe headache. As I try to make my way through the downpour, the rainwater rises up my legs, swirling around my calves like a cold, grey mist. I stumble, my feet slipping on the slick pavement. I'm soaked to the bone, shivering, and struggling to see or hear anything. All I can do is keep moving forward, because I just can't bear staying at where i was earlier, I'd probably have to just manage to scale through. Every step felt like I was sinking gradually. I hugged my bag to my chest, and the water kept plastering on my face; my clothes clung to my body, every inch of me exposed beneath their weight. The cold kept piercing through me, but I kept moving. Just then, the blinding glare of headlights suddenly cut through the rain, stopping my tracks. I couldn't hear the sound so the driver was probably moving very slowly. My heart leaped to my throat as I squinted, trying to see who it was. I turned back to see a familiar sleek, black sedan roll to a stop just behind, its windshield wipers battling the relentless downpour. The driver's window lowered, and there he was—Victor. His dark, deep voice reached me through the chaos of the storm. His countenance felt like the rain was something planned by him. His face looks like it's filled with more of the satisfaction that his plan came to life than empathy for me. My crazy thoughts continued. "Lily, get in," he projected. For a moment, I couldn't move. My breath hung, my pulse causing a steady rhythmic vibration wildly as my eyes locked onto his. "I—" I was startled, trying to say a word of disapproval, but no words came. "Now," he amplified loudly. I managed to take a step, then two, and more, staggering forward. The rain was hammering against my back. I reached the car, grabbed the door handle, and pulled myself in, trying to minimize the amount of rainwater that would follow me into the car. I slide into the passenger seat, trying to avoid getting the seat too wet. I'm aware that I'm dripping water everywhere, and I try to apologize, but my teeth are chattering too much to let any words out. The heat of the car’s interior was suffocating, or maybe it was just him. The damp chill clung to me, but all I could feel was the warmth radiating from his presence. My soaked blouse was plastered to my skin, and I crossed my arms over my chest, feeling like it was some sort of shield of myself from his eyes—or maybe myself from him. He made sure to make me make myself very comfortable before I saw him look at the interior mirror. He cleared his throat, his fingers flexing around the steering wheel as she was driving visibly slowly. "Does he want us to spend forever in this car?" I said in my mind. "I hope you are very comfortable like this," he cleared his throat and said. I glanced sideways, watching his jaw tighten. My pulse quickened when his gaze flickered to me, dark eyes lingering on my face. That was when I realized what he actually meant. "I didn't mean to..." My voice became very unsteady. He exhaled sharply through his nose. "You're always doing it." "Doing what?" "Acting like you are completely perfect all alone and you need noone," he said, his voice low but steady. The tension heightened, stretching between us like a taut wire. The rain hammered against the roof. I could feel his eyes on me again; when I turned my head, he still didn't look away. I wanted to say something, at least something reasonable, but I didn't know what I could say.His hand shifted on the wheel as he focused back on the steering. "You’re freezing," he said without any enthusiasm, like I wasn't the one he was talking to. He was starting to sound like a sweet, strict man, or maybe someone who realized he's too sweet, so he's trying to act strict. Before I could respond, he stretched to the other front seat, grabbed a jacket from the back seat, and handed it to me without looking, the rough brush of his fingers against mine sending a jolt up my arm. "Thanks," I murmured, clutching the jacket to my chest.The silence returned, heavier now, filled with everything we weren’t saying. My heart pounded so loudly I was sure he could hear it. The car pulled to a stop outside my building, the rain still pouring in sheets. I didn’t move. Neither did he. "Lily," he said, my name a whisper that felt like a command. I turned to him, my breath catching when I saw the way he was looking at me. His eyes were dark, unreadable, but it felt like there was something there—something I didn’t dare name. He leaned forward, just slightly, and I felt the air shift between us. My hand gripped the jacket tighter, the damp fabric pressing against my chest as my pulse thundered in my ears. And then, just as quickly, he placed his hand on my right shoulder. "Oh my gosh, did he just...?! His hand on my shoulder! It's like a jolt of electricity just ran through my entire body. I feel like I'm melting into his touch. I felt warm and safe. "Go inside," he said, his voice tight. "Before you get sicker, make sure you take good care of yourself; you've had a long day already." I hesitated, searching his face for something—a clue—anything—but it was closed off, his expression was very unreadable "Goodnight, Victor," I whispered, my voice barely audible over the rain. He only noticed, but his eyes followed me as I stepped out into the storm, the rain washing over me again as I hurried inside. Once I was safe behind the door, I turned back to see his car still there, his headlights cutting through the downpour. And then, he drove off, leaving me standing there with my heart racing and my mind spinning. But..., could he?(Lily's POV) The rain had finally stopped, but inside my tiny flat, a tempest of emotions had taken its place. Still wet, my clothes clung to me like a second skin, serving as a memory of the rainstorm that had brought Victor to my doorstep. His jacket, still with me, now hung over a chair, was a tangible piece of him in my space, its scent a cocktail of sandalwood and something uniquely Victor, stirring a forbidden warmth in me. I still do not know how he outrightly knew my house address, but that's even less of my worries right now. I made my way to the bathroom, showered, letting the hot water attempt to wash away the chill which I know wasn't just from the rain but from the intensity of Victor's gaze, the brief touch of his hand. Standing beneath the hot stream of water, every minute we spent together flashed through my mind. I recall his sparkling eyes, his gentle, caring hand on mine, and his breathtaking grin. I sat on the edge of my bed, wrapped in a robe, the quiet outside
(Lily's POV)Sophie and I made our exit from my place with the door having that kind of finality that denotes something unfinished business. The cool air of the night contrasted sharply with the warmth Victor's presence had left upon my skin. We walked to the library under a silence falling upon campus, bedecked with street lights. Sophie was silent, but I could feel her curiosity - like a soft hum in the background. We squatted into our study spot, surrounded by the books, but the mind was in my apartment, with Victor. I could hardly fix my attention on my notes, for they all began to blur together. Victor's jacket weighed too heavily in my bag - a secret I was not prepared to share. Sophie was busy on her laptop, but I could see eye glances darting towards me occasionally - a subtle look of concern- curiosity.I knew that the silence was pregnant. I tried to ease the weight of it with idle talk about our projects, but she still resisted. "You
(Lily's POV)The day passed by like a swiftly flowing river. Classes, lectures were nothing but echoes in my head: they were clearly not the keepers of my mind locked on the recollection of Victor, the jacket in my bag like a secret waiting to be told. I had steered clear of the early morning and had rather planned to come during late afternoons when his office hours would be less crowded so that we might snatch a moment that was truly ours.Taking a rushed lunch with an unquenched appetite, it tasted like ashes in my mouth because my thoughts were pre-occupied with what was going to happen. The hustle in the campus was quiet now as students were either leaving for the day or lost in their own worlds, oblivious to the storm inside.Every step I took resonated as a drumbeat-within him echoing my commotion. Victor's door was ajar, inviting or perhaps warning. I knocked, and my heart thudded with the noise in my chest."Come in," his voice, always the most haughty, now bore a tone of war
(Lily's POV)The sun was too bright this morning, as if somehow it had conspired with the whole universe to expose everything about me-the incidences that could well be buried in the depths of my heart. Its relentless beams streamed through the curtains and thrust into the perfect surrounding of my defenselessness, penetrating into the turmoil that was brewing within. I lay in bed tied down, remembering the kiss of Victor. It was not only the stamp of his kiss that seemed to haunt me; rather, it was the way he had lingered, how his scent now clung to me with promises forbidden, that I could not strip away. Every inhalation was another reminder of his phantom presence on my soul, creating sensations that hurt as much as they soothed.Every ounce of strength needed to push me out of bed. Each step felt heavier, infused by my thoughts. Dressing, for me, became a needless ritual of defiance: as if by getting donned in an outfit just right, it would keep me safe from my desires. I chose c
(Lily's POV)Answering the letters of the campus was loud as ever: shuffling feet of hurried students trying to make it to class, muffled sounds of friends gossiping and sometimes far-off shouting and cheering from a sports field. But every one of those sounds became an echo of my paranoia growing. All laughter seemed too knowing, all glances seemed a bit too long, and every whisper carried some hint of my secret-the secret kept inside me to torment me with a thousand fires.Victor.I felt my body tremble even at the thought of his name. It lay thumping within me, my heart, and it hasn't stopped since the very moment that changed almost everything. I passed through all that crowd filled with students, feeling like some spotlights were trained on me wherever I went, looking all around me for any telltale signs that someone knew. Did they notice how I looked at him? Probably even how he looked at me?By the time I'd reached the library, my nerves had gone absolutely. From the comforting
I jumped from the heart as the sound of its throbbing echoed in my world as it became a blur of sounds and colors. His eyes met mine, and suddenly, time stood still. I felt all: the excitement, the fear, and the impossible pull. It was as if the universe conspired for us to meet again, a cruel jest that left me breathless and aching.I quickly looked away. My legs began pushing me into a run. I hurried back to my apartment, even if my steps were quick and steady. Each step resembled trudge through water with agony from that brief encounter. All this was running in my mind like a broken tape- his face, his eyes, the way he looked at me. Was it surprise or something deeper-tension?I shut my door behind, so heavily so that the sound echoed within the still space. I leaned against it, my breath now racing, catching short gasps as I pressed a hand to my chest, trying to calm the frantic pounding of my heart. What was I supposed to do? Ignore it? Unless it happened? The kiss changed everyt
(Lily's POV)Innocent rays of morning sun lit through my window, like an accusation, into the secrets I had kept hidden within. My mind kept straying towards Victor and the kiss we shared later on, later with a meeting planned. My heart raced heavily, anticipation creating this heavy weight in my chest. I dressed carefully in a way that I had not bothered what I looked like in days; I chose clothes that felt like armor against the vulnerability I knew I'd face today-simple blouse, jeans that fit me just right, and boots that kept every other step grounded, though my heart was running nowhere near that speed.Breakfast matters very little; I could not even appreciate flavor in my tight-stomach condition. Every step to campus counted down toward seeing him again, having the conversation we both knew they needed to have but dreaded. Campus was alive with students, but to me, it was set up for the drama about to come.The topic of Victor's lesson was existentialism, the subject that mirro
(Lily's POV)Going out of Victor's office was like entering another world, with that kiss still burning on my lips and now a secret that marked me. The campus was deathly silent and this served as the complete contrast to the storm that raged within me. Each step back to my apartment dragged like heavy chains around my ankles because of what we had done.Now, the solitude of my room would usually be comforting, but right now, it felt like a cage. I changed to try to wash off the day, but Victor's touch remained, a whisper on my skin. I sat before my desk, staring at the blur of books in front of me as my mind went over the kiss, his breath in my neck, the danger of us being too close.A buzz tore through the silence when my phone went off. Sophie sent a message, and to me, it was like being thrown a rope. Hey, come over? José and Davies are here, we're just hanging out.The last thing I wanted was to spend this with friends to whom I had to confess this horrible truth. But it somehow
(Lily's POV)The morning sun felt like a spotlight on my secrets, filtering through the blinds to expose the turmoil beneath my skin. Every heartbeat was a drumroll leading to the moment I'd see Victor again, a mix of thrill and terror churning in my stomach. I dressed with an almost ritualistic care, as if my clothes could somehow protect me from the reality of what we'd done.In class, his voice sounded like a song that would be sung just for me; each philosophical point reminded me of our borrowed kiss. Our eyes met just for a second, but that was enough to send my pulse swinging out of control. Was it us he was thinking about, of the danger we thrust ourselves into?The lecture didn't hold my attention; rather, I entertained myself creating mental scenes about a world where our relationship was not something to be hidden. But then the waves would crash back, guilt, fear, and ill-desired come flooding back.As the class came to an end, I stayed behind. My heart seemed to pound agai
(Lily's POV)Going out of Victor's office was like entering another world, with that kiss still burning on my lips and now a secret that marked me. The campus was deathly silent and this served as the complete contrast to the storm that raged within me. Each step back to my apartment dragged like heavy chains around my ankles because of what we had done.Now, the solitude of my room would usually be comforting, but right now, it felt like a cage. I changed to try to wash off the day, but Victor's touch remained, a whisper on my skin. I sat before my desk, staring at the blur of books in front of me as my mind went over the kiss, his breath in my neck, the danger of us being too close.A buzz tore through the silence when my phone went off. Sophie sent a message, and to me, it was like being thrown a rope. Hey, come over? José and Davies are here, we're just hanging out.The last thing I wanted was to spend this with friends to whom I had to confess this horrible truth. But it somehow
(Lily's POV)Innocent rays of morning sun lit through my window, like an accusation, into the secrets I had kept hidden within. My mind kept straying towards Victor and the kiss we shared later on, later with a meeting planned. My heart raced heavily, anticipation creating this heavy weight in my chest. I dressed carefully in a way that I had not bothered what I looked like in days; I chose clothes that felt like armor against the vulnerability I knew I'd face today-simple blouse, jeans that fit me just right, and boots that kept every other step grounded, though my heart was running nowhere near that speed.Breakfast matters very little; I could not even appreciate flavor in my tight-stomach condition. Every step to campus counted down toward seeing him again, having the conversation we both knew they needed to have but dreaded. Campus was alive with students, but to me, it was set up for the drama about to come.The topic of Victor's lesson was existentialism, the subject that mirro
I jumped from the heart as the sound of its throbbing echoed in my world as it became a blur of sounds and colors. His eyes met mine, and suddenly, time stood still. I felt all: the excitement, the fear, and the impossible pull. It was as if the universe conspired for us to meet again, a cruel jest that left me breathless and aching.I quickly looked away. My legs began pushing me into a run. I hurried back to my apartment, even if my steps were quick and steady. Each step resembled trudge through water with agony from that brief encounter. All this was running in my mind like a broken tape- his face, his eyes, the way he looked at me. Was it surprise or something deeper-tension?I shut my door behind, so heavily so that the sound echoed within the still space. I leaned against it, my breath now racing, catching short gasps as I pressed a hand to my chest, trying to calm the frantic pounding of my heart. What was I supposed to do? Ignore it? Unless it happened? The kiss changed everyt
(Lily's POV)Answering the letters of the campus was loud as ever: shuffling feet of hurried students trying to make it to class, muffled sounds of friends gossiping and sometimes far-off shouting and cheering from a sports field. But every one of those sounds became an echo of my paranoia growing. All laughter seemed too knowing, all glances seemed a bit too long, and every whisper carried some hint of my secret-the secret kept inside me to torment me with a thousand fires.Victor.I felt my body tremble even at the thought of his name. It lay thumping within me, my heart, and it hasn't stopped since the very moment that changed almost everything. I passed through all that crowd filled with students, feeling like some spotlights were trained on me wherever I went, looking all around me for any telltale signs that someone knew. Did they notice how I looked at him? Probably even how he looked at me?By the time I'd reached the library, my nerves had gone absolutely. From the comforting
(Lily's POV)The sun was too bright this morning, as if somehow it had conspired with the whole universe to expose everything about me-the incidences that could well be buried in the depths of my heart. Its relentless beams streamed through the curtains and thrust into the perfect surrounding of my defenselessness, penetrating into the turmoil that was brewing within. I lay in bed tied down, remembering the kiss of Victor. It was not only the stamp of his kiss that seemed to haunt me; rather, it was the way he had lingered, how his scent now clung to me with promises forbidden, that I could not strip away. Every inhalation was another reminder of his phantom presence on my soul, creating sensations that hurt as much as they soothed.Every ounce of strength needed to push me out of bed. Each step felt heavier, infused by my thoughts. Dressing, for me, became a needless ritual of defiance: as if by getting donned in an outfit just right, it would keep me safe from my desires. I chose c
(Lily's POV)The day passed by like a swiftly flowing river. Classes, lectures were nothing but echoes in my head: they were clearly not the keepers of my mind locked on the recollection of Victor, the jacket in my bag like a secret waiting to be told. I had steered clear of the early morning and had rather planned to come during late afternoons when his office hours would be less crowded so that we might snatch a moment that was truly ours.Taking a rushed lunch with an unquenched appetite, it tasted like ashes in my mouth because my thoughts were pre-occupied with what was going to happen. The hustle in the campus was quiet now as students were either leaving for the day or lost in their own worlds, oblivious to the storm inside.Every step I took resonated as a drumbeat-within him echoing my commotion. Victor's door was ajar, inviting or perhaps warning. I knocked, and my heart thudded with the noise in my chest."Come in," his voice, always the most haughty, now bore a tone of war
(Lily's POV)Sophie and I made our exit from my place with the door having that kind of finality that denotes something unfinished business. The cool air of the night contrasted sharply with the warmth Victor's presence had left upon my skin. We walked to the library under a silence falling upon campus, bedecked with street lights. Sophie was silent, but I could feel her curiosity - like a soft hum in the background. We squatted into our study spot, surrounded by the books, but the mind was in my apartment, with Victor. I could hardly fix my attention on my notes, for they all began to blur together. Victor's jacket weighed too heavily in my bag - a secret I was not prepared to share. Sophie was busy on her laptop, but I could see eye glances darting towards me occasionally - a subtle look of concern- curiosity.I knew that the silence was pregnant. I tried to ease the weight of it with idle talk about our projects, but she still resisted. "You
(Lily's POV) The rain had finally stopped, but inside my tiny flat, a tempest of emotions had taken its place. Still wet, my clothes clung to me like a second skin, serving as a memory of the rainstorm that had brought Victor to my doorstep. His jacket, still with me, now hung over a chair, was a tangible piece of him in my space, its scent a cocktail of sandalwood and something uniquely Victor, stirring a forbidden warmth in me. I still do not know how he outrightly knew my house address, but that's even less of my worries right now. I made my way to the bathroom, showered, letting the hot water attempt to wash away the chill which I know wasn't just from the rain but from the intensity of Victor's gaze, the brief touch of his hand. Standing beneath the hot stream of water, every minute we spent together flashed through my mind. I recall his sparkling eyes, his gentle, caring hand on mine, and his breathtaking grin. I sat on the edge of my bed, wrapped in a robe, the quiet outside