She giggled. “I know one thing we have to figure out, though. And that’s what to do about Clinton come Monday.”“I… I don’t know, Allison.”“Well, let’s start with what you want to do. What do you hope happens Monday?”I shrugged. “I don’t know that either.”“We should figure it out, then. Because something tells me he’s not going to leave you alone. Nothing is ever that easy with him.”“I didn’t fuck him so he’d leave me alone.”She paused. “Then why did you?”I closed my eyes. “Because it felt like he understood me. And I liked that.”Allison took my hand as the two of us stared at the ceiling. The smell of nail polish remover slowly faded away, but the memories of last night didn’t. I squeezed her hand, trying not to think about it. Trying not to root myself in last night. But I couldn't help it. The way I’d fallen asleep against Clint. The way his muscles felt cradling me last night. How I woke up at four in the morning only to realize I’d fallen asleep right beside him. Wrapped u
Rae paused. “No, actually.”I leaned back. “That happen often?”She nodded. “Every time they get into a fight. She rebounds with some guy, they fight again, D.J. showers her with gifts so she’ll come back, then the cycle starts all over again.”“I’m sorry, Rae.”She shrugged. “Shit happens.”“Do you remember anything about your dad?”“Wow. You really just wanna dive in there, don’t you?”“I mean, do you have anyone else to talk about it with?”“Allison and Michael.”“Have you ever talked with them about it?”She shrugged. “Doesn’t mean I won’t.”I quirked an eyebrow, listening to her sigh. “You know I’ll understand.”“Why don’t we start with what happened to your mother?”I nodded. “All right. What do you want to know?”“What really happened, Clint?”I sighed. “I wish I knew. One day she was okay. And the next, she wasn’t. Painkillers are a bitch, but when you put it together with postpartum depression, it becomes a big issue.”“Your mother struggled after having you?”“My mother stru
I swallowed. “Just some privacy would be nice.”“I mean, you did hit the wall pretty hard. You okay?”“I’m not bleeding, if that’s what you’re asking.”I drowned out his voice with the sound of the toilet flushing. I splashed some water on my face, trying to remove the sleep from my eyes. I took the liberty of using what I had around me. Hand soap on my face. Toothpaste on my finger. I used a generous amount of mouthwash, gargling before spitting it out. I picked up the hair-filled brush and said a small prayer, then ran it underneath the water. And as Clint knocked softly on the door again, I groaned.“Can you give a girl a second?”“You aren’t the only one that has to pee, sweet cheeks.”I murmured, “Call me that again and see what happens.”“You know, you could just skip class.”I ran the wet hairbrush through my hair. “Not a chance.”“You could spend some more time with me.”“Yeah, like that’s a smart decision.”He snickered. “Your words would hurt if I thought for even a second y
“Hi. I’m—”Clint cut me off. “None of your damn business.”His father narrowed his eyes. “You wanna try that again?”“No. I really don’t.”I drew in a sharp breath. “Clint, come on. We’re gonna be late.”“Did she just come down from upstairs?”Clint nodded. “Yes, sir.”“And is that fucking allowed in this house?”“Probably not, sir.”His father charged him and I cried out. Clint shoved his ass out, knocking me outside before his father gripped his leather jacket. I reached out for him, watching as his father picked him up onto his tippy toes. And as his father barreled him back into the wall, I cupped my hands over my cheeks.“I’m sick and tired of you thinking you run this house. Shut the damn door,” he glowered.I whimpered. “Clint.”He peeked back at me with nothing but sadness in his eyes. And as his hand reached out for the door, he nodded his head.“Get outta here, Rae. Sorry for making you late and not being able to give you a ride.”“Mr. Clarke, this is all my fault. We just n
“Rae, don’t you dare tell me you told someone at that fucking school what's happening.”“And what if I did?”She tried reaching for my eye again, but I snatched her wrist. If she told anyone at that damn school what was going on and they started poking around, I wasn’t sure I’d survive my father’s assault. I’d kept it hidden from the school this long. And the last thing I needed was someone attempting to upend my life because it was their job to give a shit about me.“Leave, Rae. I’m serio—”“Cleaver!?”I closed my eyes and quickly dropped her wrist. I stuck my tongue into the inside of my cheek as Roy pried the door away from my hand. I sighed as Rae’s eyes flickered over to him, and he pushed his way beside me, chuckling. I’d tried to spare Rae from my best friend, but it had been her choice not to fucking listen.Why the fuck did she never listen?Roy laughed. “What the hell are you doing here, Cleaver Beaver?”Rae rolled her eyes. “I could ask you the same thing, Roy Toy.”He shru
“Can I do anything for you?”“Do you want me to get you some ice cream?”I looked over at Roy and he winked. He was right. Women couldn't resist a guy with bruises on his fucking face. But if they knew how I’d gotten those bruises, it would be a different story. The line of girls coming up to me asked me where I got them, and each time my fight story became a little more dramatic. It went from some kid on the side of the road to some kid picking on a girl on the side of the road. Then, it morphed into some college kid on the side of the road picking on his fiancée before I offered to show her what a real man could provide.It was the first time in my life I ever felt pathetic for it.“Clint!”Rae’s voice pierced through the cafeteria and my eyes fell upon her. She strode with intensity in her movements and a sour expression on her face. The girl at my side, trying to practically spoon-feed me ice cream, got up and stepped off to the side. Roy chuckled and out of the corner of my eye I
“What do I do?”She sighed. “There’s nothing you can do. You can’t change a man. So you can’t let that man change you. Bad boys are just that. Bad. Bad for you. Bad for themselves. Bad for anyone who comes into their lives.”I nodded slowly. “People at school will know soon enough.”“And all you can do is stand up to them. Stand your ground and don’t let them beat you into it. High school is relentless. There isn’t a person on this planet—rich or poor—that would do it all over again. I’m here for you, no matter what. And you can talk to me about anything, okay?”I smiled softly. “Thanks, Mom.”She tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “I guess we both have a tendency to go for the wrong men.”I giggled. “Yeah. Fuck D.J.”Mom laughed, covering my mouth with her hand. “Fuck D.J.”“Did something happen?”Her hand fell away from my face. “Isn’t something always happening with him?”“I thought you two just made up, though?”She shrugged. “Maybe I didn’t want to make up this time. Maybe I’
I ignored all of their comments and questions as I lumbered into Marina’s parents’ house. I slid the patio doors closed behind me, seeking solace in the ice cold air conditioning of their kitchen. I walked over to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water, chugging it back as it filled my stomach. I backed it up with another. Then another. And slowly, I felt my veins being freed of the alcohol I’d pushed through them.Which freed my mind up to roam even more.“Clint! The fuck!”Roy’s muffled voice hit my ears and I turned around. I saw him banging his fist on the kitchen window before he shrugged at me with an attitude I didn’t like. I held my bottle of water up to him before drinking the rest back, but Roy wasn’t a fan of my actions. He looked pissed. Though I didn’t know why.I mean, did he sell his soul to Satan in order to get me that girl?Terrible exchange.I tossed my third empty bottle of water into the trash can, then grabbed a fourth. And as I cracked it open, I started wa
Because I knew this meant taking another step for Clint and me.A step I felt we’d both been ready for.“You want to rehearse?”I peeked over at Michael. “What?”He snickered. “Rehearse. You know, what you’re going to say to him tonight.”I shrugged. “Nah. I’m good. I usually wing it with stuff like this.”“You’re going to wing it when it comes to telling Clint how you feel for the very first time>”“I mean, I usually wing it with my English speeches and I do just fine with those.”He paused. “You didn’t plan out that speech you gave last year?”I shook my head. “Nope.”“That massive speech you gave on 1984 sort of applying today.”“Are you not hearing me right? Clean out your ears, Michael.”He chuckled. “Holy shit, you’re amazing. You know that?”I smiled. “And I hope that’s one of Clint’s many reactions tonight.”“If it isn’t, I’ll kick his ass for you.”“Michael!”“What? Come on, Rae. I see how happy he makes you. I see how much this boy means to you. And if he doesn't love you o
And I decided she would be. If she knew what was happening right now, she’d be proud. Possibly screaming at me like Cecilia currently was. But she’d be proud after the fact.Not today, Dad. You’re done with this shit today.The only thing I processed was the smell of alcohol. The only thing I felt was my father’s storm unleashing against me. He held so much anger within him. He had such fury in his fists. The only thing I saw were his angry eyes coming at me as I shoved him in his chest, listening as Cecilia screamed in the background.“Stop it! I’m calling the police if you don’t cut it out right now!”Her voice faded away. Fell into the background as I moved and ducked my father. Whatever this storm brewed from, I wasn’t going to be my father’s punching bag any longer. If he wanted a fight, a fight is what he’d get. And I’d make sure to repay him for every fist that ever connected with my face. I’d repay him for every bruise he ever wrung around my neck. I’d repay him for every knee
I felt myself blush. “Okay, yes. We are officially together. So, yeah. We’re going to prom together.”“You still don’t sound too sure of that. Is everything going okay with his recuperation?”I shrugged. “I mean, he’s always struggling with his dad. Which I’m sure is affecting his recuperation efforts. But he’s okay. Far as I can tell.”“I’d like to get his dad in a room for a few minutes.”I scoffed. “Wouldn't we all.”“So, how are the two of you? You know, now that he’s on the mend?”I felt myself blush deeper. “I guess we’re good.”“You guess, huh?”“You’re a dick, you know that?”He chuckled. “Maybe a bit. Can I ask you something, though?”“Of course. I mean, you have to spit it out soon because I only have one more minute, but—”“Do you love him?”The question didn’t catch me as off-guard as I figured it would. In fact, it was easy to answer. I bit down onto the inside of my cheek as I turned to face Michael. And with a nod of my head, I answered his question.“Yeah. I really thi
I stopped for one last breather a couple of blocks away from my house. I watched it looming in the distance, sparkling underneath the harshness of the sun. Sweat dripped down my back as I sighed. I watched the off-colored white glisten against the deep red shutters of the house. During the entirety of my childhood, I remembered that house in three distinct ways. Three different sets of colors that all popped more than the houses around it. Maybe it was the fresh coats of paint put on it every year that kept the house lively. Maybe it was the fact that it was the biggest house on the block. Or, maybe, it was the fact that we had the only house with a wrap-around porch as well as a wrought iron front gate that was barely utilized.Either way, it stood out.I picked up the pace. I went from standing still to walking. To speed walking. To jogging. I burst into a sprint, pumping air through my lungs and feeling them expand into my back. I felt the last pangs from my ribcage fall free, rele
“What? I mean, seriously. Come on. Your dad can’t actually think any of this was your fault. They almost killed you. They were drunk, from what I could gather from that night. They should be rotting away in jail. Or juvie. Or something.”I shrugged. “My father pretty much showed his ass in that office. Said things like I needed to be focusing on school instead of chasing down four guys I’d provoked.”Aly’s jaw dropped open. “What!?”“He also said I’d been a problem child my whole life. Essentially tried to paint me as some bad boy trying to get the one-up on someone before they got the one-up on me. He told the lawyer that he didn’t see those boys pressing assault charges on me when I started the fight. So why should I press attempted murder charges on them simply because they were seeking out revenge like most young boys do?”Mike’s face turned red. “Is it always like this with your father?”I sighed. “I mean, let’s just say I’ve talked a big game in the past with bruises I’ve come t
I snickered. “Which is apparently not very good. I know something’s wrong. Do you want to talk about it?”Clint dropped his bag. “Just—that shit with the lawyer yesterday.”I nodded. “What happened?”He leaned against the brick wall of the school. “Dad’s back in town.”“Oh, no.”“Oh, yeah. I told Cecilia time and time again not to tell Dad about the fucking lawyer. And of course, she didn’t listen. She’s awesome, but she never fucking listens. It’s like she thinks Dad’s actually gonna be this decent-as-fuck person one of these days. Then she gets shocked and hurt and scared when he loses his shit. She’s been married to him for four years! The fuck is she thinking!?”I placed my hands against his chest. “Deep breaths. Come on, take them with me. There we go.”I walked Clint through some even breathing. He was shaking against my hands, and I needed him to settle down. That explained everything. With his father back in town, shit always popped off. I smoothed my hands over his torso, try
I paused. “I’m not sure if that makes me feel any better.”Cecilia butted in. “You have to do something, Clint. They really did a number on you. Even if you simply sue them for the hospital bills or something—”Dad snickered. “Yeah. Pay me back some of that money.”“Howard!”I rolled my eyes. “Please excuse him.”“Did you just excuse me for someone else?”I looked over at my father. “I did. Because you’re acting absolutely insane right now and I’m tired of it.”His eyes lit up with fire as he stood up from his chair. His eyes panned toward the lawyer as he buttoned his suit coat. Cecilia got up quickly and followed him out of the room, trying to talk some sense into him. And as the door closed behind them, I cleared my throat.“I’m really sorry for that.”Omar shook his head. “Not your fault, Mr. Clarke.”I sighed. “So, if I wanted to press charges, what would we do?”“We’d gather evidence and serve each of their families with a formal subpoena. The boys are being held right now, so t
“Uh huh.”“Then, Clint drove off and they followed him. Pursued him, right?”I nodded. “Yep.”“And even though Clint tried shaking them, they kept following him. Until they ran him off the road.”I swallowed hard. “Yeah.”“In my eyes? The only thing Clint has accountability for is getting their focus off you. That was his fault, and it had good intentions. Good motives. Everything else was spurred on by those boys. From pulling up to you guys in the first place to chasing him down, no matter what. To me? The charge should be attempted murder.”And after a brief pause, I nodded.“You make a very good point about that.”Allison scoffed. “There’s no point about it. Drunk or not, those boys knew what they were doing. If they had enough sense to keep in control of that car long enough to be able to ram Clint over the edge of that bridge, then they had enough sense to choose not to.”I grinned. “You sure you don’t want to be a lawyer or something?”She giggled. “Nah. I’m just really good at
But all she did was shrug.“You guys ready to go?”I nodded at Cecilia’s question, then felt her ease us out of the driveway. I wanted to press the questions. I wanted to pull out of her what was wrong. But I didn’t want to do it in front of my stepmother. Rae wasn’t okay, though. And I had a feeling it had something to do with last night.I watched as Rae gazed out the window. She watched the world pass us by as she sank heavier and heavier into the leather seats of the car. She didn’t speak. Not one fucking word. And I desperately wanted to ask her what the hell happened after I left last night. I called Cecilia to come get me around midnight, and D.J. was still there. Her mother and D.J. had still been downstairs, going back and forth at one another. It was like they never stopped. She’d say one thing and he’d clap back. He’d say something wrong and she’d chew him out for it. It made me sick, leaving Rae in that kind of environment last night. I almost had a mind to ask Cecilia if