RackI can’t sort out the rambling thoughts in my head. I know what to do with anger and aggression. I’ve handled both more times than I care to count. These thoughts are different. Watching Beth nurse the baby is the loveliest, sexiest, and most precious thing I’ve ever witnessed. Not that I’m thinking sex while watching. No. I’m thinking family, settling down, and changing my life. It’s a joke I can’t laugh about. I’ve done too many terrible things and I’m not finished. Not even close.“You’ve got it bad, brother mine,” Linc says while rocking the baby. The child I haven’t held because even thinking about it makes my stomach twist into knots. There’s this yawning hole in my heart and if I touch him I don’t know if I could ever let go.Linc is destined to be a father. He’ll be wonderful at it—a great husband, drive a minivan, and do his best, even with his job, to never miss one of his kid’s games. Our father did the same. If Linc wasn’t holding the baby, I swear I’d deck him.Yes, I
BethPillows are behind my back and I’m nursing my hungry son. My nipples are sore, but I don’t care. I crave this closeness and need the comfort it brings.Part of me wishes I hadn’t listened to Rack and Linc’s conversation. I’m incredibly foolish when it comes to men. It never occurred to me that Rack was anyone other than who my brother wrote me about—a good, solid man. Now I’m back to square one—in too far over my head with no way out.Rack doesn’t believe I love him. Why should he? He has no idea I see him through my brother’s eyes. Nick conveyed his respect for Rack in every email he sent. It was easy for me to fantasize and turn Rack into a mythical god. It was so easy to form a crush on the man my brother handpicked. Nick made it clear that Rack was perfect for me. Then I met Kevin, a real person and not just some fantasy guy my brother gushed over.I was angry with my brother too. Angry that he re-enlisted and returned for another tour of duty. Rebelling against Nick’s amazin
RackI sleep beside Beth the following two nights. We don’t speak about her future and she never mentions the sleeping arrangements. I would move to the couch if she insisted. I lie to myself by thinking it’s safer for me to be in the room with her. So much remains unsaid and maybe that’s how our relationship will end.The baby sleeps next to the bed in a bassinet. The downside is that I lay awake longer than I should thinking about what it would be like if this were really my life. A wife, a child. A dream I never imagined. I only close my eyes when I’m too exhausted to keep them open.On day four at my brother’s house, I take my throwaway cell into the backyard and sit on the steps while Daisy does his business. He’s one of the oddest looking dogs imaginable with shepherd markings and the kinky curly hair of a standard poodle. The day after we arrived, Daisy and I had a serious problem when he tried humping my leg. Linc, the ass, snickered. Shelby stopped me from pummeling my brothe
BethCarson is fussy. Hell, I’m fussy. I have no control and it’s like being at the ranch all over again.Rack is delivering me into the hands of a motorcycle gang. A very bad one. He didn’t pull punches when he told me who and what they are.I walk back and forth over the cool tile floor and bounce Carson against my chest.“I’ll walk with him if you need to sleep.”I turn to Shelby, who’s been nothing but wonderful. Now I’ve brought danger straight to her doorstep. “I’ll sleep in the car after we leave. I’m sure Carson will sleep then or at least I hope.” I’ve tried everything to get him to nap. Not even feeding works.She wipes the edges of her eyes. “We’ll miss you,” she says as she bends down and pets Daisy.I stop walking. “I’m so sorry, Shelby.”She stands and crosses the space between us. Her arms wrap around me and Carson. “Don’t ever be sorry, we’ll be okay. All you think about is this, sweetheart.” She pulls back and smiles “Now hand him over and let’s see if Aunt Shelby can
RackI know Beth is worried, but she hangs in like a trouper. I told her a little about the Crows. Two years ago their help wouldn’t be an option. Each man riding behind us has spent time in prison. None of them transitioned easily. When Dax took over as president of the club, he had just rescued a child from being sold on the black market by the man he killed to gain leadership of the club. That child is the niece of the woman Gomez fell in love with. Without Dax’s help, I’ve no doubt the child would be dead now.After Dax killed the president of the Crows, he made sweeping changes. The biggest being acceptance of the Latina woman he fell in love with and married. You toe the line and follow Dax’s rules or you become part of the Arizona desert terrain in an unmarked grave. Dax and his club might be slightly domesticated now but the way they deal with trouble is similar to Moon’s approach and I don’t see that changing.Gomez is indebted to Dax for saving Celina’s niece, and Dax is ind
BethI somehow get lucky and Carson sleeps the rest of the way. I’m able to doze for about an hour. Rack pulls into a fast food drive-thru the first time I complain I’m hungry. Having him take care of me has become a habit I need to break. He is a habit I need to break.I eat the fries and burger but go light on the soda because I’m hoping not to stop for another bathroom break. Living this past week without pregnancy bladder has been great and the soreness from giving birth is gone too. Shelby purchased me some jeans a size larger than I wore before becoming pregnant and I managed to slip them on before leaving today. Unfortunately, they’re still tight and it’s made for an uncomfortable drive.The scenery changes when we head through the mountains. This isn’t what I expected in Arizona. The tall pine trees and milder weather are welcome. It’s not green in the way Montana is but the beauty is undeniable. Another hour goes by and we descend from the higher elevation. Rack cranks up the
Rack“She’s in good condition and so is the baby considering neither has been examined since the child’s birth,” Carlo, also known as Dr. Santos, says scathingly. Santos is Moon’s friend. “Beth needs more fluids, which I spoke to her about. If you are still here in two weeks, I’ll get a new weight to make sure the baby is progressing normally. Beth told me your brother and his girlfriend helped deliver the baby via Google. I’m not usually one for practicing medicine found on the Internet but even I’ll admit they did a good job.” His stern voice lowers and his expression intensifies if that’s even possible. “I also told Beth no vaginal sex for four to six weeks after childbirth. I want to be sure you understand the consequences of possible infection if she isn’t healed properly.”We’re in the room Dax set up for me. It’s downstairs and little more than a closet. He talks straight and I’ve always respected him. How do I explain that Beth and I don’t have that type of relationship? I can
Vampire gives a low whistle. “She’s one hot mamma.”It takes a few seconds for me to understand he’s talking about Beth. To say my hackles go up is an understatement. Doesn’t matter that I have no right to be jealous. She had a baby a week ago and the small bulge at her belly makes her sexier in my opinion. From Vampire’s words it’s his opinion too. I bend low over the table to take my shot and glance up before my stick connects with the ball. “Look at her again and I’ll cram this stick up your ass.” I’m not smiling.Vampire lifts his chin. “Duly noted.”Dax puts up with no bullshit when it comes to the club women, even the ones who live here and make their living by sleeping with the members. That’s Sofia’s influence more than anyone’s. I tuck my head and make the next three shots, sinking the eight ball last. “I believe we’re even. Care for best two out of three?”Vampire rubs his chin. “You’re on, but I have the strangest feeling you’ve been holding back on your game.” He racks the
I rolled over and yawned, my arms coming from beneath the soft white cotton of the bedding and bumped the hard body next to me. Moon’s hand went into my hair and he moved his leg between mine and something very hard hit my belly making me smile. The smile lasted a few seconds before I covered my hand and jumped from the bed trying to get to the toilet before I lost the contents of my stomach. Yep, that was sexy. This time the hand in my hair pulled it back away from my face while I heaved my guts. He didn’t say anything and just waited for me to finish. It was horrible and at the same time endearing because I loved him so much. I stood and leaned back against his body. “Crawl back into bed and I’ll grab tea and crackers,” Moon said gently. I wanted to bitch and moan about the morning sickness but held it in. When I had my shoulder injury that took me from my career as a cop, I had a small amount of control. I could do my physical therapy and ice as needed and it worked. There was
Duke The wedding night was at the cabin and our honeymoon at the property. We had a week to ourselves. Cori laughed when I carried her over the threshold and straight to my bed. “Do not touch that dress,” I typed into my phone before checking the house was secure and I could fuck my wife for the first time. Her laughter followed me. When I walked back into the room, she was waiting exactly where I left her, smart woman. She opened her legs wide, the stilettos going to either side of the bed. A bit of red showed. The dress was fucking perfect. I crawled between her legs and pushed the yards of black lace up higher in the bed and snagged the red G-string with a finger. The garter wasn’t in my way. Cori sat up suddenly and stopped my exploration. “You spoke your vows.” I smiled even though my dick throbbed. “Thank you,” she added and lay back. I planned to fuck her until she couldn’t walk or talk. I didn’t remove the red nothing lace. I lazily fingered her, then took a long, slo
CoriIf I weren’t lying down, I would have fallen. Of all the things she could say, it was the last I expected and I couldn’t hide my shock.“No, I’m not pregnant yet but we’ve decided to try. We’re leaving and starting a family. Alex and Celina are taking over Moon’s operation.” She turned to Celina. “I’ll call it Alex’s operation eventually.”“Are you sure?” I asked softly.I was having trouble processing.“I’m absolutely positive. I thought I never wanted children but when Moon brought it up, I knew I was wrong. I want Moon’s babies.”“As in multiple?” I asked in horror.Children wasn’t something I ever wanted. I was not a rug rat fan and could tolerate Sofia’s rug rats for a limited time only. I thought Mak and I were on the same page.“We’ll decide if we want another after the first.”“Congratulations,” I offered, my voice uncertain.Melina started laughing.“You’re taking it how I did. The last thing needed in this world is a mini Austin.”I could most definitely second that.“O
CoriLife slowly returned to normal, though my new normal was much different than the old one. Things changed more after the cast came off and Duke could ride again. That’s when I became a true biker bitch.I blinged the shit out of my newly purchased black wardrobe and made that shit look good. I had standing orders from the other old ladies too. The club whores and I had a talk and we seemed to be on good terms. My end of that conversation was short.“Keep your hands off my man and we won’t have a problem. Touch him, even when I’m not around, and you’ll lose a fucking nipple, we clear?”They were fine with it. I understood their world. Respect was key. I had no problem with their choices as long as they respected me and my man.Dax’s club was a community of misfits and I fit in like I never thought I could. They didn’t care that I arrived in five-inch stilettos, looking like I was heading to a ritzy club. They accepted me as Duke’s old lady.Duke spoke to Dax and arranged a week off
Cori“How is Mr. Grumpy today?” Mak asked. She had her overprotective Pitbull at her side. I hadn’t seen Two-dogs since I arrived with Duke. I contained myself to the kitchen and Duke’s room. Two-dogs stayed out of Gabriella’s domain because the two of them stayed at war over what was permissible and what was not. I secretly thought Gabriella slipped the dog treats when no one watched but I had no way to prove it. I guess her new kindness made me think she was something other than Attila the Hun. I needed to watch those stupid fantasies.With assistance, Duke had made it downstairs for this morning’s physical therapy. He refused pain meds afterward and fell asleep exhausted. It gave me time to do something normal. I’d quietly left the room and gone to the outside patio to escape. The heat, even with the water misters, would make it too hot to stay for long but it was nice to be outside.I blinked at Mak who carried a towel. She took the lounge chair beside mine.“He’s sleeping. I’m es
DukeMy biggest problem was boredom. It almost went hand in hand with people poking and prodding constantly. I didn’t live at the clubhouse for a reason. If it weren’t for Cori, I would have found a way to escape Moon’s place the first day. Maybe. I was fooling myself. The ability to lift a spoon to my lips was pushing things.I remembered little about what happened at Wild Fur. Between blood loss and the damage to my stomach, I should have died in oblivion. Things were foggy since waking too. I remembered telling Cori I loved her. It just came out. I hadn’t practiced speaking in years. It was something I did when younger when no one was around. I never felt comfortable with the sound of my voice and eventually decided it wasn’t necessary. That was true until Cori. There were things she needed to hear. Cori hadn’t asked me to speak since it happened. I doubted she even understood what I’d said.My grandfather took me in when my dad went to prison for almost killing me. They were the b
CoriThe air in the room was soft if that were even a thing. There were four rows of chairs. There was a podium at the front. No crucified Jesus hung from the wall, only a large framed needlepoint with writing.“Enter in peace and leave your sorrow.”I sat in the front row and bowed my head. My prayer was to Jesus.“I’ve never asked for anything.”Tears gathered in my eyes and turned to sobs. I couldn’t go on and fell apart. So many thoughts tumbled through my head. I was the whore of Babylon. If there were a man who would hear me, it would be Jesus.“Please,” was all I managed the next time I tried.The quiet settled over me and I inhaled in and out slowly. Within a few minutes, I wiped my tears. The room, like Duke with his silence, gave me peace. It also gave me strength.I went back to ICU and held his hand again. He wouldn’t die because I wouldn’t let him. I spoke to him quietly and assured him all would be okay. I spoke of silly things. I had to keep the connection so he knew I
CoriIt took us more than three hours to get back to the city and another hour through rush-hour traffic to get to Wild Fur. Moon sent his men in first and stayed with me in the SUV. Alex and Austin were with the other women at his compound. Moon didn’t want them here. He’d also left a vehicle behind with four men on Duke’s property to dispose of the bodies.The men cleared inside the Wild Fur quickly. There were two female employees cleaning and handling inventory. The place didn’t open until eight at night. They weren’t harmed and they were assured they could leave after we found Duke. The men hadn’t located him when they cleared the building. Moon and I entered and were shown the entrance to the basement.A light had been turned on. It looked no better than the club upstairs. I saw a rat scurry along the wall. Moon found the hidden door within a few minutes. He pried it open and we entered the dark room.The smell of excrement and death hit us.Death.I couldn’t breathe.In the sha
CoriDuke never left my thoughts. If he was dead, so was I. My life changed that fast. We hadn’t known each other long and it didn’t matter. He was everything I wanted and most of all he was someone who loved me for who I was. I knew he loved me. He shared his silent world and refused to take advantage when he could have. From the time his arms wrapped around me in the car after my escape from Fernandez, we belonged together.My past didn’t matter to him because he lived in a world where endurance and hard work were part of life. Duke and the men like him respected survival.Moon brought more firepower than required and the guns we’d pulled from the cave weren’t exactly needed. I decided to stick with Duke’s weapons because he made sure I was familiar with them. A piece of him was with me.Our plan had been to ambush the vehicles a mile before the entrance to the property. Alex moved the attack to the house. I wasn’t worried about Cartwright’s men knowing the location. None would leav