V. CONFUSION

The Montenegro family only stayed at the hacienda for two days. I was standing outside the mansion, watching Raphael's back as he left. I felt a pang in my heart as I looked at him. I swallowed hard because I felt like I was going to cry at any moment. My fists were clenched, and I could still feel the anger rising from my heart. I didn't want to talk to him, and I didn't want to see him again. But I wanted to ask him why he did that to me? Why did he deceive me and hide his true identity as the heir of Montenegro? And most of all, I wanted to know if he really loved me or if he just played with my feelings? Because of what happened and what I discovered, I kept my pregnancy a secret from him. I had no intention of telling him about it. I also had no plans of introducing him to my child as his father. I would make sure that he wouldn't know my child and that the Montenegros wouldn't take my child away from me. After that day, I never saw Raphael again. I didn't hear anything about him, and if I heard his name, I would immediately avoid the conversation and leave. I didn't want to know anything more about him, nor did I want to hear his name and surname again. I just wanted to live a quiet life and work without thinking about anything. I didn't want my child to be involved in any trouble, and I didn't want my child to know who he was and what his true identity was. I managed to take care of the baby in my womb on my own for six months. Many people were curious and asked me who the real father of my child was because they didn't see me with a boyfriend. I didn't answer them; instead, I just smiled and pretended I didn't hear anything. Even Betty couldn't help but ask me questions, although I knew that every time she looked at me, her eyes were full of curiosity. During those six months, I managed to be independent without anyone's help, without asking for help from him.

One day, I was shocked to see his familiar face again. I was in the garden, watering the plants, when I heard a faint snore. I followed the sound until I came across a man lying on the ground, sleeping soundly under a tree. His face was covered with a newspaper, and I slowly removed it to take a peek and find out who he was. My eyes widened in shock when I saw his face. I stepped back, lost my balance, but he quickly grabbed my right hand to prevent me from hitting my head on the ground. It was as if time had slowed down, and everything around us had come to a standstill. Our eyes met, and just like the first time we met, his handsome face and captivating eyes, which shone like stars, left me breathless.

"Are you okay?" he asked me. I couldn't respond immediately because I was taken aback by the sudden turn of events and couldn't believe that he was standing in front of me again, holding my hand. I was also surprised by his voice, which I hadn't heard in six months, and the way he looked at me with so much affection. It had been six months since we last saw each other, and my belly had grown bigger. Many things had changed, but I couldn't understand why, despite all my efforts to forget him, the memories of our time together came flooding back, along with the love I had for him, which I thought had disappeared. It was as if everything I had gone through had become meaningless now that I had seen him again.

Is this really what it's like when your first love is the person? That no matter how hard you try to forget them, they're still the one you love and your heart longs for? That even though many things have changed and you haven't seen each other in a long time, it's as if nothing ever happened? Why am I feeling this way now? I don't understand, but one thing is certain - I miss him so much. His eyes, his sharp nose, his heart-shaped lips, his warm hands, and everything about him is what my heart longs for, and it's as if I'm eager to hug him tightly. I'm like a child who's crying and eager to hug their mother. It's as if my mind has gone blank, and my world only revolves around him.

Nothing else enters my mind, and I don't see anything around me except him. I admit that the anger I feel towards him is still there, and I won't forget it. But it seems that love can indeed make you blind. No matter how intelligent or wise you are, when someone comes along and makes you feel special, you become a slave to love. No matter what they do or how much pain they cause your heart, you still long for them. I want to confront him, yell at him, and pour out all my resentment towards him. But when I looked into his eyes again and heard his voice, it was as if the past was slowly fading away.

"I love you," I blurted out, and he looked taken aback, with a hint of surprise on his face. At that moment, it was as if I had lost my mind, and I uttered the words I wanted to say to him. Tears were welling up in my eyes, and I had a bittersweet smile on my lips. Before I knew it, I had hugged him tightly while crying. Maybe I'm a fool if others find out what I'm doing. But I don't want to lie about my true feelings. I love him, I love Raphael so much, and I'm willing to do everything to win his heart back.

"Why did you leave me? Did you know that I've always been thinking about you, wondering where you were or if you were okay?" I asked him, sobbing like a child.

"Umf?..." I didn't notice the time, and I didn't know what the outcome of all this would be. I just poured out all my emotions and tears on his shoulder while hugging him tightly. Until my tears subsided, and my feelings eased a bit, I finally realized what I was doing. I immediately let go of him and turned my back on him.

"I'm sorry if I lost my mind. There's just one person I miss and long to see. Please don't give the wrong meaning to what I did and said. If possible, just forget about it, forgive me." That's all I said to him before I left, but he quickly grabbed my right hand to stop me. I stopped and looked at his hand holding mine.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he said, releasing my hand. "Before you go, may I know your name?" he added, but I didn't respond because I wanted to forget him completely.

"Don't take offense at what I'm saying, but I just want to get to know you and find out if we've met before?" he said, as if he had no clue what was happening to me. I quickly turned around and faced him with a puzzled expression.

"What do you mean? Don't you recognize me?" I asked him, and he laughed and looked down at the ground.

"I don't know. I don't know who you are, but it feels like my conscience is telling me that we know each other." His response was accompanied by an innocent smile. I was taken aback and wondered why he seemed to be telling the truth, as if he really didn't know me.

"Actually, the truth is that I—" he started to say, but was interrupted when Betty called out to me. Without a word, I turned my back on him and joined my friend.

"Who's that? Isn't that Sir Raphael? Why is he here? Just a moment—" Betty said to me, stopping in her tracks.

"Have you two talked already? Did you tell him everything?" she added, referring to my pregnancy with Raphael's child.

"No." I replied briefly.

"No? What do you mean?" she asked.

"He doesn't know, and I don't plan on telling him about it." I said firmly.

"But why don't you want him to know that the child you're carrying is his? Don't you want to escape poverty and give your child a luxurious life?" she asked, and I gave her a sharp look, as if I didn't like what she was implying.

"I never desired his wealth. I don't need the Montenegros' money, and I can take care of my child on my own." After saying that, I left her and quickened my pace. If that's what they all thought of me and my child, I would rather leave this city and go far away so they wouldn't find out about my child's true identity. Yes, I love him, but I won't allow them to take my child away from me and hurt him. I'll make sure that no one hurts him and that they won't take him away from me.

As I walked away, I couldn't shake off the feeling that my life was about to change in ways I couldn't imagine. The encounter with Raphael had left me reeling, and I couldn't help but wonder what had just happened. Why did he seem not to recognize me? And what did he mean by saying that his conscience was telling him that we knew each other? I had so many questions, but I knew I had to push them aside and focus on protecting my child. I couldn't let Raphael or his family get their hands on my baby. I quickened my pace, determined to put as much distance between myself and the Montenegros as possible. But as I walked, I couldn't shake off the feeling that I was being watched. I glanced over my shoulder, but there was no one there. Shrugging it off, I continued on my way, my heart heavy with worry and uncertainty. Little did I know that my life was about to take a dramatic turn, one that would change everything forever.

As I walked, my mind was racing with thoughts of Raphael and the Montenegros. I couldn't believe that he didn't recognize me, and it hurt that he seemed to have forgotten me so easily. I thought about all the memories we had shared, the laughter, the tears, and the moments of pure joy. How could he just forget all of that? I felt a pang of sadness and regret, wondering what could have been if things had turned out differently. But I pushed those thoughts aside, knowing that I had to focus on the present and the future. My child's well-being was my top priority, and I would do everything in my power to protect and provide for them.