Chapter 105
EllieMy grandfather once told me a story about attainment . He had taken care if me for most of my life , and for that I was thankful . What I was more thankful for was for the lessons he had taught me about money ; attainment and possessions .
All three are interlinked and mostly the lessons that I have been taught have a something to do with a triad . Everything that has life is bound to die and be reborn again .
Money has always been a possession that has controlled the person who attained it to acquire something , tangible or physical . As you grow older you realise that what you possess shouldn’t control you ,and you should control what you possess to attain something that can keep s on giving and gives in return .
So basically possessions and money cannot fix everything . What my grandfather Abraham taught me was that; it i
Chapter 105EllieMax seldom cries and, when he cries he usually means it . He doesn't cry crocodile tears , what I do know for a fact is that when something really scares him his sensitive side comes out .I placed my palms in his wet cheeks and kissed him . He leaned in and kissed me back when I opened my eyes he took a deep breath and hugged me . I hugged him back and he held me tighter . He was still crying and I kissed his shoulder and pulled back to look at his stormy grey eyes that were now red and his face reflected doubt and fear." Who pulled a Paul on you and made you doubt yourself so much that you don't even think you are worthy of anything you deserve? "" Betty . Have you ever given your all and no matter how hard you try ; you are told you aren't good enough , that ; you suck at being a boyfriend , you aren't good in
Chapter 106MaxI think I an hard wired to mess up anything good that I have and that includes relationships and hurting the people I love . Since I am far away from Johannesburg and I am down by the coast I can't drive out to go talk to my father or Abraham, Blake is out galavanting with Salvatore and Daniel is the last person I want to see or talk to because he has two personalities.When Ellie called him to talk to me I was iffy from the get go because not too long ago he wanted Ellie, and Ellie chose me. She loves me and I love her. I trust her . I was just angry and in the heat of the moment I said something I didn't mean. I said a lot of things I didn't mean.She's never walked out after me after I have walked out on her and for the first time she did that. She even asked me not to make her beg . I get why Paulina was mean to Ellie
Chapter 107MaxAaron looked at me and he had a grim expression on his face . I took the shot of espresso and I wasn't going to sober up any time soon and I think I was going to be spending the night at Aaron's" I almost lost Alexis when; my son David accidentally pushed her down the stairs and we thought we had lost AJ . I understand that you lost your first baby with Eleanor , and I get it , I honestly get that you fear losing what you already have and that's a scary feeling ."" It is a scary feeling . Its no secret that my step father was in jail because he beat my mother up every chance he got . ""Max I know that you have childhood abandonment issues , and a couple of other things . Eleanor has not once exploited your feelings , she has tried to be understanding , patient and kind. "" She told me that I
Chapter 108EllieLast night was hectic . I love Max; but some things take more time to come to terms with, especially when they have changed you , to the point where you question every little thing and wonder when the fairytale is going to end . When I met Max for the first time when I was a kid ; he was like the best friend I never knew I needed . I had been in a dark place for a while after my brother’s death . When my mother started travelling , I let her go . Part of me knew she needed to heal , but I also needed to heal too . It took months before I could talk to anyone properly and when Max came around I started talking and laughing. My grandfather had gotten me the right kind of help with regards to child psychologists and counselors . I didn’t heal overnight. I had to put in the work and have difficult conversations.The hardest conversation I had to have was with my mother. I felt abandoned when he left to go do what my brother
Chapter 109EllieWithin seconds there was tension in the room and the energy had gone from calm to tense. I had only ever talked to Juan over the phone and we video called each other . He had dark brown hair and light brown eyes .He still oozed of creativity , and his voice was melodic. I couldn’t believe my life. Cleo told me that she had a brief stint with him and Michelangelo had sent him away to cover up Jake’s tragic passing . I was there when it happened and I had to cover the story .Juan had been an absolute gentleman and he was there for Cleo . He is he dependable type and he gets things done no excuses . Juan had always come across as a perfectionist and when I asked Daniel about his track record he said that; he had worked with the Luca family for years and he and him were similar with regards to personality.I was starting
Chapter 110MaxI have always had trouble opening up and trusting people . I have been hurt so many times and I have been let down by people who have promised love and never delivered . I love Ellie yes , but what is love without full trust . I don’t trust easily ; and once you have my complete trust I expect the same from you. When you are keeping things from me that comes across as betrayal and I normally react with vengeance.Betty abused me and treated me like crap , and I think I would rather be in a relationship with full trust that I know I am controlled with no secrets than be in a relationship with someone who can’t even tell me about a traumatic event in her life that changed her . Ellie knows about my past she was there for me when I was going through hell or some sort of doubt phase . She knows everything about me and I am starting to believe that I don’t know ,my girlfriend as well as I think I know her .
Chapter 111EllieI have never not once lost sleep because of a guy . I am really not talking Maxwell walking out on me very well . Every time my phone rings I run to it hoping he would call and he doesn’t . To be honest my work has been keeping my mind off a lot of things and that includes Maxwell . Juan doesn’t trust Paul and he had offered to stay a bit longer so that we could get some work done for the game on Saturday and the launch of the new S.F.C Jersey next week Wednesday.Paul had a meeting to go to and Juan and me ended up working through the night . Aaron was lying to me because I could sense Max’s energy around while he was talking to me yesterday . Maxwell and I are connected in more ways than one and I can feel him before I see him and its vice versa with him . I had a feeling he knew that I knew that he was with Aaron and not in bed with a woman fucking her brains out , to work off some stress . I was t
Chapter 112EllieI looked at Daniel and he looked at me seriously . As soon as the elevator opened he guided me into his office and closed the door . As soon as I sat down on the couch he sat next to me and handed me a juice box . It was pineapple juice..." Drink up . "I drank the juice and he handed me a Nutella sandwich. I took a bite out of it and washed it down with some juice before I spoke." Who packed your lunch for you ?"" I did and I am proud of myself. "" I used to wonder what the combination of your taste was when I woke you up with head. Now I think I have an answer for the question that was bugging me . "He gently placed his index finger on my lips and I stopped talking."Don't say it I really love the combination ."I held his hand