- LOUISA -That reporter Asher is watching me. Yeah, I know I haven't had a full night's sleep in a couple of weeks - really, it's been more like months - but I know this isn't just exhaustion-fueled paranoia. I run a lot of errands for Mr. Haymore, all over the estate, and I seem to run into Asher more than I should.Most of the time he doesn't say anything. He doesn't even let me catch him looking in my direction. But I can feel it. Like a tickle down the back of my neck.I consider finding Ward and letting him help me forget my worries for a while, let him finish what we started last night. But today, instead of feeling giggly and satisfied with the things that happened between us last night, I find myself with a knot in my stomach. He told me things last night about his past. About himself. He's opening up to me, little by little. And I still haven't told him my real name.Is it worth the risk, letting him know the truth? He has no love for the people who run this place, so I
- LOUISA -Ward's already up at the rooftop pool when I arrive. He's abandoned his sling for the night, and he's lounging in one of the chairs, his arms behind his head as he stares up at the stars. For a moment, I just stand at the door and stare at him. He looks so peaceful. His face is relaxed, his body spread out. I don't mind the view one bit.There are so many things I need to tell him. The truth about my identity. The fact that some reporter thinks he's hiding some big secret. But those things can wait. I don't want to think about them right now.He glances over as I approach, and his face spreads into a smile. Butterflies explode in my stomach. God, I don't want to lose him. Whatever this crazy thing is between us, I need it right now.I don't wait until I'm next to him. I strip off my clothes piece by piece, leaving a trail of garments behind me as I approach the pool. It's balmy tonight, and the air is so warm and humid that I won't be surprised if we get rain later."Y
- LOUISA -We make love again that night, and we drift in and out of sleep between our explorations of each other's bodies. It's the best sleep I've had in recent memory. When I finally wake up, the sky has lightened a little - just enough to signal that dawn might not be too far away. It hasn't stopped raining, but it's still a light, peaceful drizzle.Ward stirs beside me, as if somehow in his sleep he's sensed me waking beside him. We're still on the chaise lounge, our arms and legs twisted around each other, and his eyes drift slowly open. A smile curls across his lips, and he tilts his face forward and leaves a soft kiss on my temple."Can I ask you something?" I say softly."Mmhm." He's moving his mouth across my hair now, as if making up for the lost kisses during our earlier embrace.There are so many things I want to say. To confess. But now that the moment's here, I'm terrified. My tongue doesn't want to move. Somehow, while I slept, I lost a bit of that emotional intim
- LOUISA -Apparently, though, after I insisted on staying here against the advice of, well, everyone, the universe has decided that it's not going to let me escape this place easily.Staff members and journalists have already started making their way out of the house by the time I slip through one of the side doors. Some are looking up at the house with curiosity, still trying to figure out where the fire is, if there's one at all. I spot Mr. Haymore (who's almost unrecognizable half-dressed as he is) running back and forth, his face looking dangerously purple. And there are the Carolsons, standing together - and the look of dismay on Edward Carolson's face is amazingly satisfying. I can only imagine the damage those sprinklers are causing right now. Carpets, furniture, decor - all getting drenched. Some of it will be completely ruined. I wouldn't be surprised if they have to consider pushing back the grand opening for a few weeks or so.I stroll right past them. Everyone's too fo
BOOK FIVE: TAKE YOU AWAY- WARD - I never thought I'd be so happy to see a fucking gas station.At first I think my brain's just screwing with me. After all, we've been in the car for fifteen hours straight and I've downed so many energy drinks that I'm shocked I haven't started hallucinating yet. We've seen nothing but empty highway for almost sixty miles. And my gas gauge has been on empty for the last fifteen. We passed a single rest stop a while back, but that's it. I was beginning to think we'd be stranded out here until that neon light lit up the sky, like a damned angel with diesel prices dangling out of her ass.Ol' Stella just barely makes it up the off ramp. There are funny noises coming from beneath her hood as I roll into the station, and she's sputtering by the time we're at the pump."There, girl," I say quietly, patting the dashboard and yanking out my keys. "You did it."I glance over at the passenger's seat. Addison - Louisa - is curled up, her head resting agai
- WARD - I push myself up on my elbows and look down at her. She shakes her head and smiles, and if somehow that'll disguise the fact that she has tears on her cheeks."What is it?" I ask softly, brushing my thumb along her jaw.She shakes her head once more, and when she looks up at me again, I see that familiar guilt in her eyes."What?" I continue to stroke her cheek, but my stomach clenches before she's even said a word."You shouldn't have come with me," she whispers. "You shouldn't have given all that up for me."And there they are. The words I'd been afraid to hear. They aren't a surprise, but that doesn't mean they don't tear me up from the inside out.But I force my voice to be light."Given up what?" I ask. "A shitty job at a place I hated?""You didn't hate it," she says. "Not all of it. And your father - ""Carolson was never going to give me the time of day. You know that. As far as he's concerned, he's already done his duty by me."She doesn't look convinced.
- LILY - Calder hasn't said anything in three hours.I've tried all of my usual tricks. Poured him a glass of wine. Slipped on my skimpiest lingerie. Wrapped my arms around his neck and sucked his earlobe into my mouth. But though those last two stunts definitely got some reaction out of him, he still won't talk to me about what's going on in his head.Not that I don't have a few very good guesses about the matter.Yesterday, he found out his sister was working at their family's former estate. This morning, when we drove out to the grounds to bring her back, Louisa took one look at him and ran. We spent the better part of the day searching for her, but she's long gone. We have no idea where she is. And we're not the only ones who want to find out - Edward Carolson, the estate's new owner, plans to hold her accountable for all the destruction she caused. I'm not sure whether he intends to have her arrested or sued for damages or - God forbid - both, but I know better than to ask Ca
BOOK SIX: LOST AND FOUND- LOUISA -"I can smell it," Ward says, his eyes lighting up and his hands tightening on the steering wheel. "Fuck me, I can smell it!"He's wearing one of those grins that makes my insides feel like mush and tilting his head toward the open window of the car. The wind pushes his auburn hair up in every direction, but he doesn't seem to notice. He's too busy breathing in that unmistakable briny scent that means we're getting closer to our destination, that we're almost to the ocean.I smile to myself and reach my hand out my own window. The air presses against my palm, and the sun beats down on my skin. I wiggle my fingers, trying to soak up the warmth. Some of my curls have come loose from my ponytail again, and they whip across my face. I close my eyes and take a deep breath, following Ward's example and tasting the first hint of our destination on the wind. By my estimation, we're still an hour away from the beach, but the evergreens on either side of th
- CALDER -I wait until both Lily and the baby are asleep before I decide to sneak out. As much as I want to sit here with her in my arms forever, our conversation about her mother reminded me of a call I need to make.I look down at her before I leave. Her brown hair is in a messy bun on her head, and she doesn't have a stitch of makeup on, but I don't think I've ever seen her look so beautiful. I lean over and press a kiss against her forehead as I lift our sleeping son out of her arms.He's so tiny that I'm afraid I'll break him. But even though he was born a little early, the doctor told us he's perfectly healthy - and after hearing him scream this morning, I'm tempted to believe him. This little guy has quite a pair of lungs on him.I settle him gently in the bed the nurse wheeled in for him. I can see so much of Lily in him - and so much of myself. I knew I would love my son, but the intensity of my feelings is startling. When I think of how close I came to losing both of the
- LILY – Two Days LaterThey won't tell me what happened.I remember the pain. The screaming. The fear.I remember hearing the first, sweet cry from my son's throat.I remember the miracle of Calder's voice, the proof that he was alive.But after that, there's only darkness.I woke up yesterday morning in the hospital. Calder tells me they were able to get an air ambulance out to us at the estate, but he won't give me any more details than that about what happened two nights ago after he made it to the house. And there's a desperate, hollow look in his eyes when I ask, so I don't press him for details.Honestly? I'm not sure I want to know.And truthfully, it doesn't matter. Calder is alive. I'm alive. And our son is here. So much has happened in the past couple of days, and none of it feels real.I look down at the tiny little human in my arms. He's perfect. Even though he arrived a couple of weeks before his due date, he's still round and healthy. He emerged with a thick cro
- LOUISA -Just stay calm.Just stay calm.Just stay calm.It doesn't matter how many times I say it to myself - it gets harder with every passing second. I spend almost twenty minutes searching for my cell phone in the rain, but I can't find it anywhere. It's not in the car. It's not on the driveway. It's just gone. Finally, I force myself to give up the search and return to check on Lily - and I'm not a moment too soon.If I had any hope that we might make it through the night without this baby - after all, I was in labor for nineteen hours - it's fading fast. After five minutes at Lily's side, it's clear that her little one has no intention of waiting for help to arrive, and she seems to know it, too. Even if I thought I still had a chance of finding my cell phone, I can't leave Lily now.Both Ward and Calder are still out there somewhere. It's just me and Lily - and a whimpering Ramona, who's still clearly confused and terrified. I long to go over to my daughter, to pick her
- LOUISA -Lily's face has gone white."Calder?" she says into the phone, her voice cracking. "Calder! Calder, answer me!" Her hand visibly shakes as she pulls the phone away from her ear."What's going on?" I ask her, running over and shifting Ramona in my arms. I've just managed to get my little girl to stop crying. "What happened?"She doesn't answer. Instead she hits a couple of buttons on the screen, presumably calling him again. I glance over at Ward, but he looks just as shocked and confused as I feel.After a moment, Lily drops the phone, her eyes wide with horror."What happened?" I ask again, my stomach sinking further with every passing second. Something is wrong. Something is desperately wrong. Ramona starts to whimper in my arms."Lily," Ward says firmly. "You have to tell us what's happening."Lily glances up, blinking, as if she's suddenly remembered she's not alone."Something happened," she whispers. "Something happened to Calder."She's in shock, that much i
- CALDER -Lily is in labor. Lily is in labor.That thought drives out everything else - even the raw, gnawing feeling in my gut when I think about what Michelle has done - and suddenly nothing matters but getting to my wife.If I was a madman on the road before, it's nothing to how I drive now. I don't care about the rain or the traffic. I don't care if a cop chases me down for driving twice the speed limit. I'm getting to that hospital. Getting to my wife.I should have been there, I think. I should have been by her side when this started. But though the guilt eats away at me, I can't think about that now. I have one concern and one concern only - getting to her. Being with her as soon as humanly possible. Holding her hand as the pain comes. Even over the phone, I could hear the fear in her voice.I need to be with her.And if I have to kill myself to get to her, I will.. . . . .- WARD -Keep it together, man. They're counting on you.I hate that I have to remind myself o
- LOUISA -It might be storming outside, but I'm determined to make today a little brighter."I have a surprise for you," I tell Ward.It took me half an hour to find him after I put Ramona down for her afternoon nap. Even though I've insisted that he take a break from his restoration projects, Ward has continued to work, and I find him retouching the paint in a bedroom in the eastern wing. He's currently perched on a ladder with a paintbrush in his hand.When he grins down at me, I know he couldn't be happier to see me."What sort of surprise?" he asks, and his expression makes my heart skip a beat. He climbs down the ladder and stands in front of me.I drink him in as he wipes the back of his hand across his forehead. His T-shirt has streaks of paint on it, and there's a new hole in his jeans, but somehow all of it works together to make him look irresistibly yummy. Something wells up inside of me as I admire him - and the way he's looking at me right now brings the blood rushi
- CALDER -Less than two hours later, Michelle and I are in Barberville and I've got her set up at a modest little extended stay hotel just outside of downtown. I've prepaid for a two-week stay, and after that, I'll reassess the situation and figure out the best course of action. Michelle told Lily that she was looking for a job in the area, but since learning the truth about her health, I'm not sure whether that was an empty claim or not. Either way, though, now is not the time to be making any rash decisions. Lily comes first. We'll deal with Michelle after the baby is here.I'm getting ready to leave when a thought occurs to me."Lily will have lots of questions when she learns the truth. And she'll want you to start treatment as soon as possible."She starts to protest. "I still don't think I want treatment - ""At the very least, will you go talk to a doctor here in town? Explore your options? I'll pay for your visit, of course."She hesitates, then nods. "All right."I tur
- LOUISA -I'm in the office on the south side of the house, working out some of the final details of my surprise honeymoon trip for Ward, when Calder stalks into the room."Good morning," I say - though you'd hardly know it was morning, considering how overcast it is outside today. When I glance up and see his face, my fingers freeze on the computer keyboard. "What's wrong? Is it Lily?"We had a bit of a scare yesterday, what with Lily getting rushed to the hospital. She'll be on bed rest for the duration of her term, but both mother and baby are healthy - or so I thought. Calder looks like he's hardly slept. There are dark circles under his eyes, and he seems agitated."We need to figure out what Lily's mother wants," Calder says, jerking a hand through his hair. "It's that woman's fault that Lily is in this state."I lean back in my chair and glance over at Ramona. She's in her playpen over by the window, and she's pulled herself up onto her feet so that she can watch her uncle
- CALDER -That was too close.My jaw hurts from clenching. My mind won't slow down. I've been pacing the same spot on the floor for so long that I'm surprised I haven't worn a hole into the boards.It was only a false alarm, I remind myself. Lily is fine - for now - and the doctor said she was only having Braxton-Hicks contractions, probably made worse by stress. But even though she's now safe in our bed, I still can't seem to make myself calm down. When it comes time for the real thing... I don't even want to think about it."There's no need to be so worked up," Lily tells me. "Everything is fine. Come to bed.""Everything is not all right," I say. "Your mother upset you so much that you - ""It was my dad's fault, too," she says. "And it was a false alarm. I'm all right. No harm done.""Maybe not this time, but I'm not willing to take that chance again." I resume my pacing. "That woman needs to go.""I agree," she says. "And she's already looking for a place. But in the mean