Chapter 23 - R.I.P.

Noah

Ever since Lisa's death, Raymond hired a housekeeper to do the cooking, cleaning and laundry. I only assisted with his medical care. Even though I felt bad for not helping more, I was grateful. I felt so weak and tired to the bone.

The grief hurt so much. It felt like the loss of Lisa had knocked a huge gaping hole in my being. The emptiness felt dark, painful and raw. I spent most of my days in bed or on the wooden terrace, staring out over the lake.

Death was an inevitable part of life. I learned that lesson as a young girl, growing up without my parents. I had always known that death could come at any moment. But this was the first time I experienced a loved one’s death consciously, as an adult. It hurt more than I ever imagined.

On the morning of Lisa's funeral, Raymond and I had a light breakfast together, although I wasn’t hungry and felt queasy. We both got dressed in black and took his BMW to the funeral.

The season was turning to winter. The weather outside was gloomy. T