CHAPTER 2: Need To Clean Up My Act

-=Ang's Point of View=-

"How long will you keep yourself locked up in sadness, Ang?!" My mom angrily said this to me when she entered my room that morning.

To be honest, I don't know how long it's been since I let go of Atilla from my life, but even so, everything still hurts as if it happened just yesterday.

"Just leave me alone," I answered lifelessly. I woke up to her angry voice and was about to grab the bottle of alcohol by my bedside when she aggressively knocked it out of my hand, causing it to shatter.

"You want me to leave you alone? It's as if you're saying that I'm a useless mother," she said with pain in her voice. I couldn't stop the guilt from rising in my chest, especially since I knew I was becoming unfair.

"I'm sorry..." I said it weakly, feeling her concern for me.

"Ang, please think about it. We're here; we're your family, so we're ready to help you. Please don't push us away," my mom said as tears flowed freely from her eyes.

"I'm really sorry, Mom. I'm sorry for keeping my problems to myself," I apologized as I held her tightly, causing her to cry even more.

I know I became too self-centered by locking myself up in sadness. I didn't think about my family, who needed me, especially because of what happened to my brother, Anthony.

After that talk, it was as if a switch was flipped inside me. I quickly threw away the alcohol bottle in my room. My mom was right: there is life after heartbreak. Yes, it hurts, but I know I can get through it because there are more people who love me. Furthermore, my family needs me because of what we're going through with Anthony. It's been over a month, but there's still no change in his condition.

He remained in a coma, and all we could do was wait and hope that he'd wake up one of these days.

After tidying up my room, I decided to visit my brother, who was in the room next to mine.

I realized that I hadn't visited him in his room for a long time, so I felt a lot of guilt and pain when I saw my younger brother again. I saw his body slump, with only machines helping him breathe.

"Hi there, kiddo," I greeted him sadly. I couldn't force a smile, especially since my heart was breaking at the sight of my younger brother's condition.

I quietly sat on an empty chair beside his bed and held his cold hand tightly in mine.

"I know I've been neglecting you, Anthony, and I'm sorry I let myself be consumed by too much sadness. But I promise you, for you and for Mommy, I'll do everything to move on," I promised. I stared at his face firmly, hoping to see any sign that he heard me, but several minutes passed, and I still didn't get any response from him.

"Stay strong, kiddo; we're not giving up on you," I said firmly as I kissed his forehead, and then I decided to go out of the house to breathe in some fresh air. It was a bit hot that day, so I decided to walk towards the pool, which was located at the side of the house where the garden was.

As I approached, I suddenly stopped when I saw that someone else was using the pool. I was hypnotized watching Miranda swim back and forth; every movement she made stirred something inside me that felt wrong. I lost all sense while I quietly watched her.

I felt the lust starting to consume me as the organ between my legs grew while I watched her swim beautifully. She momentarily stopped, perhaps sensing that she was not alone, and when she looked up, our eyes briefly met, but I quickly averted my gaze because I was afraid she would read my feelings during those hours. First of all, I was angry at her because I knew she was a bad woman and not worthy of my brother, and secondly, I could not stop my desire for her, even though she was already my brother's wife.

"Good morning," she greeted me with a smile as she slowly emerged from the pool, and my desire intensified when I saw her curvaceous body, wearing only a black two-piece swimsuit, dripping with water. I could already imagine having sex with her in the water.

I quickly dispelled those thoughts because I knew I was sinning just by thinking about them.

"What are you doing here? You prioritized swimming over visiting your husband?" I said angrily, trying to hide my voice's tremble caused by the lust that still burned strongly inside me. I tried to hide my erection from her sight, especially since I was only wearing a white pair of shorts.

"For your information, I already visited Anthony earlier, and I just wanted to swim because the weather is so hot. Is there something wrong with that?" She bravely answered back, which made me pause momentarily as I compared her with Atilla. Why did I have to compare them when Atilla was a saint and Miranda was a sinful woman?

"Whatever! Just stay out of my sight," I said, focusing more on my anger than on any other emotions I felt while looking at Miranda's seductive body.

I was about to go back inside when she called my name.

"Ang..." she called me, and even though I wanted to go away since everything about her screamed sex, I chose to stop and listen to whatever she had to say.

"Speak up already, Miranda; I don't have all the time in the world," I replied flatly.

"Why do you hate me so much?" She asked, and even though she was trying to hide it, I knew she was hurting, and even though I did not want to, I felt some kind of emotion in my chest that I promised I would not feel for her, and that was pity.

"I don't hate you, Miranda; I despise your kind. You women will do anything just to become rich. When I look at you, I only see a gold digger who is not worthy of my brother," those words came out of my mouth like acid, and I saw the pain on her face because of what I said, so I decided to continue walking back to my room.

"Whether you believe it or not, I did not marry Anthony because of his money," I heard her shout after me, but I didn't pay attention and continued walking back to my room. As I entered the room, sweat was dripping down my forehead, not because of the walk or the weather, but because of the woman I left at the pool.

"I think I need a cold shower," I said to myself, and I started stripping until I was in my birthday suit. I quickly entered the bathroom and turned on the shower, trying to quell any desire I was feeling.

"Dude, relax," I said to the thing between my legs. I was probably in the bathroom for thirty minutes before the heat I was feeling finally dissipated.

"I need to remember who Miranda Sandoval is, I need to remember that she is my brother's wife."