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In Denial
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2024-10-29 19:42:56Related chapters
Her Burning Desire Wavering Feelings
(Avery’s Thoughts)I am currently at the learning center finishing the final hours of my crash course in Art Literacy and The Way To Curating. Obviously, my body is present but my mind is elsewhere. It has been almost a week since my last argument with Dmitri. At some point, I feel relieved since the last argument already made it clear. However, a part of me is mourning for his non-existence. “Miss Anderson, are you with us?” I finally hear my British professor who’s been calling me countless times. “Uh, yes, sorry, what’s the question again?” I ask him.He crosses his arms in front of his chest and taps his right foot due to annoyance, “There’s no question Miss Anderson. I am just jutting down the list of students who will participate in our little tour, the one I’ve mentioned a month ago.”My face flustered as the other students laugh at me, “Err, yes, I would love to. Where is it again? And when’s the deadline for confirmation?”“Supposedly today, but since you haven’t decided
Her Burning Desire The Question Whys
(Dmitri’s Thoughts)Unending calls from my sister Heather wake me up. The vibration from my phone just won’t stop. So I answer it for the first time in a week, “Don’t you have a life?”I can imagine her face with just her voice, she scoffs and says, “Well, if you had just come home a few days ago, I wouldn’t end up wasting my life calling you, Dmitri. You told me you’ll come home after your restaurant’s opening?”Blah, blah! I let her nag all she wants, “I had to take care of some things. What do you want? The Vice-CEO is there. He can do all the tasks.”“Remember, you promised Dad you’ll do better, don’t let thi-”“I know how to handle my company, Heat. So give it a rest. I can’t come home, I’ll be in Germany next week. I’ll stay home for a while. I haven’t paid Manor Sullivan a visit for a while now,” I straightforwardly express my annoyance. And I hang up. I sigh and massage my temple, “Damn it! Can’t I take a rest? As if the company will shut down without me.”***I decide to p
Her Burning Desire Fly To Germany
(Avery’s Thoughts)“Wake up sleepyhead, you still need to pack,” I hear Jeff’s voice, but my body doesn’t want to get off to bed. In fact, I don’t even want to join the tour anymore, but since I already signed up for it, I have no choice. I remain sleeping and don’t mind his wake-up call. So he pokes me non-stop on my side until I burst into laughter. “You really don’t want to wake up, huh,” he pokes here and there.“I’ll tickle you until you get up,” he continues to tickle me until I could no longer breathe because of too much laughing.I tap his shoulder, “Okay, okay, I am awake now. Stop it!”Then he showers me with morning kisses. And I hug him. I look him in the eye and say, “I am going to miss you, two months is so long,” I frown.He kisses me deeply, “Babe, it will pass by fast. Remember, this is for your career. I can wait for you. After that, we’ll plan our wedding, okay?”“Can’t I just stay here, and practice being your wife?” I ask silly. “Get up before I change my min
Her Burning Desire Things I Never Thought Of
It is only a short flight but thanks to the alcohol, I feel I slept the whole night. I still feel warm and I bet my face, especially my cheeks are still red. We are still at the airport and it is late afternoon. Our professor and the whole class decided to eat at a nearby restaurant which we pass on our way to our accommodation.It is my second time in Germany. The first one is when I went to Manor Sullivan. “Here I go again, reminiscing and connecting every memory with Dmitri,” I sigh, feeling disappointed in myself. I take out my phone and see my wallpaper, Jeff and I together, looking happily. A girl from behind teases me, “Hey, it hasn’t been a day and yet you miss him already. Free yourself up, bride-to-be, soon you won’t be able to have fun” she even adds and the others laugh, too.My professor who’s just about our age and kinda cool scold them, “Let Anderson be, at least she’ll get married, I just don’t know about most of you.”Everyone laughs. We go straight to the parking
Her Burning Desire The Promised Street
“How would you care for a walk here later?” Dmitri said in my memories of him. He suddenly invaded my mind reminding me of the promise we made a few years back. I erase that memory and continue walking outside the hotel.When I first came to Germany, I fell in love with Ludwigstrasse street in Garmisch-Partenkirchen. It is a busy street, especially during the night time displaying lots of city night lights in a pedestrian street packed with tourists. I came to know the place when Dmitri brought me to Manor Sullivan, we passed by that street and we actually made a promise to each other that we would go back that night. But since his presence was needed in New York at that time, we didn’t get a chance to come back. I sigh, standing here, fulfilling the promise we made, only not together, but alone, on my own. My eyes are still mesmerized by the blissful and vibrant mood this street is emitting. Stores left and right offer different kinds of things. The restaurants all have their al f
Her Burning Desire German Tour
I get a hangover after drinking so much from my free night. I don’t even know how I get to my hotel room. I just know someone accompanied me to my room. My head is spinning. Peach hands me over a hangover medicine, “Here, take this. You gotta move fast, we’ll leave in an hour,” she reminds me. I get up and sit on the bed for a while, massaging my temples after taking the medicine, “Oh god, I don’t know why I drank so hard, I feel my head is about to crack any moment.”“Well, welcome to Germany, one that holds the strongest beer,” then she laughs while fixing herself.“By the way, Peach, how did I get here? I mean I remember I couldn’t even walk or even stand, I must have crawled or something,” I ask curiously. “Oh, that… A super gorgeous American guy brought you here,” she says while her eyes are shimmering.“A what?” I ask surprisingly.“You heard me right, dear. Well, he looks like a rich man, but a gentleman, since he brought you here in one piece. And it seems that he knows you
Her Burning Desire Real Coincidence
(Avery’s Thoughts) (Street Night)After Audrey left with her boyfriend, I am now, all alone in this street. I suddenly feel the melancholic vibes of it, and eventually, everything feels and seems big. The smallness of my sole existence is intensified when I look around, the alcohol got the best of me. I try standing up, despite my wobbling knees, and I manage to retain my balance, or so I thought.I look like more of a hunchback cause I get my balance from leaning forward and stepping my foot one at a time. I build a rhythm of “1, 2, Left…”“1, 2, Right…”“Come one, Avery, you have to get to the hotel fast, go girl,” I cheer myself up aloud. Audrey’s right, they won’t care about you, cause they don’t know how to speak English, so far I am doing fine. Maybe, by sunrise, I can reach the hotel. I scoff, “So much for my first free night here, huh?”I continue to walk, well almost crawling until I bump into something solid but bouncy. It isn’t hard but comforting. So I try it once aga
Her Burning Desire How Do I Unlove You?
(Dmitri's Thoughts)"Dee?" she sweetly calls to me when she realizes it was she's meeting tonight.But unexpectedly, she doesn't walk away from me, nor scream at me, instead, she just stands across from me, waiting for my response patiently. Her eyes are locked on me, her damn beautiful expressive eyes: the ones that I yearned for to look at me again. I gulp at the sight of her and couldn't answer immediately. She looks elegant in her old rose dress. My body automatically reacts, though, like a gentleman in front of her. I stand up and leave my position, I walk over to her and kiss her on her cheeks. Then I guide her to sit and even pull the chair for her, one thing that I've been dreaming to do again for her. She still seems surprised but she remains calm during the start of the night. And the best part of the beginning of this dinner is the way he called me. I haven't heard her call me 'Dee' since the day she left. And I must admit, it makes me extremely happy. Everything seems
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Her Burning Desire The Virgin’s Cravings (Until The End)
(Avery’s Thoughts) (Two Years After The Divorce)I am standing backstage at one of the famous morning talk shows here in NY.I don’t know why I feel so nervous, well, it is my first TV appearance nationwide.Then I look at the mirror and fix myself, “Well, I am not yet ready to reveal my personality so I think of a way to hide my identity, and that is to use a pen name and a sophisticated mask, like the ones you wear in a masquerade ball.”A staff finally reaches out to me and says, “Miss Sparks, in a minute they are going to call you on stage. And your cue is the dimming light, okay?”“Uh-huh,” I hesitantly answer.But she is there to boost and cheer me up, “Take a deep breath, relax, and remember, you are good, and you definitely got this!”The sound from the crowd suddenly dies down and the voice of the host is heard. I look up at their gigantic spotlight and wait for the cue.I take a deep breath and say to myself, “You got this, Avery. You got this!”“Let us all welcome with a ro
Her Burning Desire Setting Free ( I Love You More Than You Know)
(Avery’s Thoughts) “Dear Avery - My Loyal Wife, When you came into my life and agreed to be my wife, that was the best day of my life. That day, on our sudden wedding day, I promised that I would cherish you more than anyone else.I swore to protect the smile on your face, a smile so genuine when I first met you at that hotel five years ago. Avery, I know you’ve been trying so hard, and you never once failed to fulfill your duty as my loving wife, even if it means putting your heart aside. You’ve been so good to me, and you’ve been faithful to me like you promised me. But sometimes kindness and compassion aren’t enough when love is forced. Eventually, the true feelings will immerse.With so much regret, I’ve seen you fell right in front of my eyes. I’ve witnessed how your bright spark faded when you married me. I’ve become the reason why you lost yourself.I let it happen. And I can’t forgive myself for that ever again. You were forced to love me. I forced you to love me. And
Her Burning Desire Life of A Married Couple
(Avery’s Thoughts)“Babe, did it come out now?” Jeff yells behind the door. While I am damn nervous to even peek at it. “It is only a minute, it needs another minute, babe. Please, don’t stress me out,” I yell back at him. “I’m sorry. I just feel so excited about the news. I can’t wait to tell mom and dad about our baby!” he says exhilaratingly. “Don’t jinx it!” I scream angrily. “Okay, okay, I’ll wait here patiently,” answers Jeff. I am here sitting on the bathroom floor, waiting for the result to come out from the pregnancy test kit. It has been almost three years since we got married and there was never a time that we didn’t try having a baby. But until now, there’s still nothing. I hug my knees and start crying silently, “What if it fails again? Am I infertile?” I ask myself. The kit finally ticks and now I have to face the truth. God knows we’ve been trying so hard that’s why I even ask Kendra to take full charge of the business for now. I stop all my physical activities
Her Burning Desire Ending The Unfinished Business
(Avery’s Thoughts) Our El Nido, Palawan experience was splendid. And of course, I still can’t believe it. I came there single, “And now, I am officially Avery Tales. I am now married,” I murmur as I stare at both my and his wedding ring while he’s holding my hand in his sleep. It’s been a week since we came back here to America. Of course, the honeymoon stage has just begun and Jeff wants to make love to me almost every time. And me, being a good wife, always give him what he wants. Although, right now, I think I am still a little swollen down there. I go to the bathroom to clean myself up and wash my face as I promised Kendra I’ll be meeting her so we can talk about our new business venture. After brushing my teeth, I wake Jeff up, “Hey, babe. Didn’t you say you have an interview at Kirkland’s Best?”He groans and instead of getting up, he pulls me into the bed and showers me with morning kisses. I giggle as his kisses tickle me, “Babe, stop it. We have a lot of things to do tod
Her Burning Desire The Greatest Best Man
(Avery's Thoughts)Even though the wedding is sudden, Jeff managed to pull it off, and he has planned it all along. So after the wedding ceremony, we stayed for a little bit, I got to finally meet his parents. And for the longest of times, I once again felt the warm embrace of a parent. It made me cry because I knew that I am no longer alone, and no longer an orphan. Because now that we are married, his parents became my parents, too. And I can’t deny, my heart is full. After that, we stayed to talk to our guests for some time, and then we ate and enjoy the party, too. And now I am here standing on the balcony staring at the moonlight, while Jeff is still cleaning. I don’t know why. It isn’t the first time we are going to have sex, but for some reason, now that we are married, there’s this tension inside me, a feeling of hesitation, a feeling that I am officially owned by him. And unexplainably, I feel afraid. And now, my heart almost stops as I hear the gushing of the water fina
Her Burning Desire Suddenly Married!
(Avery’s Thoughts) Later this evening, all four of us will meet Jeff’s parents. And because of it, I am so dead worried and I can’t get this nervousness out of my system. So while Jeff is away meeting his parents ahead of time, I rush downstairs and go to our neighboring villa. I knock ceaselessly, but Kendra and Nik aren’t coming out. I move back to look up, and I see that the light is on, it means they are there, so I continue to rampage on their door. “Kendra, Kendra,” I knock nonstop, “Open up, please!” I scream a little loud. Then after five minutes of almost breaking their door down, someone finally opens the door for me. “Thank God you finally come out, what took you so l–” I am about to complain but when I see her glaring at me with her hair a little bit frizzy and wrap in a blanket, I know that I should be more careful with my next words. Then later on Nik comes down with a little sweat on his forehead. “Uh-oh, definitely bad timing, Avery,” I say to myself. Then Kend
Her Burning Desire Healing Trip to El Nido
(Avery’s Thoughts) “Hey, we are going to be late for our flight!” I yell when I notice Kendra still struggling with how to put all her stuff in one big luggage. “Wait up! This stupid luggage just won’t listen to me!” she frustratedly yells back at me. Kendra is not a patient and she hates dealing with this kind of stuff. So I go to her room to check up on her. And there I see her leg wrestling with her luggage just so she can close it up. “Stupid-little-luggage!” she yells and kicks before she pounds it hard in the end. And then she sits beside it looking at me with so much energy wasted. “Help me out, A?” she begs. I smile at her and then gently hit her on her forehead. “That’s why I’ve been telling you to pack a week ago,” I nag at her a little and she sticks her tongue out for a moment. “Hmm, let’s see what unnecessary things you put in here,” I tease her. Then I begin to take out some clothes and things she can’t wear to our destination. “Nope!” “–But I need it.” “–It’
Her Burning Desire She Must Not Know
(Kendra’s Thoughts)Then a slight touch on my shoulder and a breathy apology are enough to get hold of the situation, “I am sorry, Kendra. Let me fix this,” is all he says. And even without looking, I know this one is definitely Dmitri’s voice since it triggers the hatred hidden deep within my bones.And as he passed by me, he steps up and grabs the arms of that tallest guy, “Let go, Luke, please,” he calmly says.Then the man who fell suddenly stands up continuing his tantrums like a child, “Why are you siding with them, Dee? He punches me first, you should get mad at that bitchy Heather’s husband” then scowls at Dmitri. But Dmitri is true to his words for the first time in his fucking life, he is trying to fix the situation. He glares at him and Luke, “I said Let go, Luke. Don’t make me say it for the third time, and you, I told you to be more careful with your words, this is my city, they know me here as a businessman, you should have thought of me more before creating a scene. T
Her Burning Desire Secret Revealed
(Kendra’s Thoughts)Avery finally got discharged from the hospital and in the meantime, I invite them over to stay in my apartment instead of wasting all their money paying for a hotel room. I have two more spare rooms in my apartment so I guess it is fine. Kervin is still here, so they will look after him while I go out with Nik and enjoy our anniversary. I am about to finish dolling up when A enters my room. “Hey there, gorgeous,” she says while leaning on the side of the door. I am currently wearing my earrings when my side zipper comes undone. So she goes to me and says, “Here, I got this,” she says and helps me out. I can’t stop smiling. I am just happy to know she’s here. I am happy we get to do this again. I hear the zip sound finishes, “Okay, you are good to go, sexy K. Are you going to bring the house down tonight with your fiery red velvet bodycon dress?” she pokes my side. “Oh god, no. We will just eat and then go home since that bitchy wife already knew our annivers
