Thankfully, Zen was a fast learner. No, it wasn’t simply thanks to the reincarnation perk that Celine — God, gifted him. Goblins weren’t the smartest monsters. Everyone knew that across every universe. There were no instances when a goblin was depicted as an intelligent or fearsome final boss. Hence, their language reflected this simplicity.
Gobo.That was the basis of all words in the goblin tongue. The gamer could understand why the royal scholars rejected the Baron’s research. Even Oritha would be able to figure this out in a matter of two days. It wasn’t very difficult to understand goblin words. “Gobo, gogo bogo, gobobo bo,” Zen rehearsed in front of the shady merchant, who stared at him incredulously. He knew that it was his job to drop hints for players. Zen was a special player from the moment he set foot in the dungeon. However, he didn’t think the kid would be serious about learning a fictional language fAfter parading around the courtyard with his new outfit, Zen and Venedict disappeared to fund Gunter. The hardworking commander was still keeping an eye on the goblins camping outside their side entrance.Once away from prying eyes, Zen humbly asked Venedict for a lift to the top floor. The warrior said nothing. He wasn’t even the slightest disgusted by the filthy appearance Zen had. The strong man lifted Zen over one shoulder and carried him like a sack of potatoes. The blood rushed toward Zen’s head, and his face burst into flames when his arse was held in a very visible position. Somehow, this way of getting carried gave him déjà vu.Gunter didn’t bat an eye when Venedict entered the strategy meeting room with Zen on his shoulder, wearing goblin armour and covered in filth. The commander only asked how the investigation with Stoneberry Keep was progressing. It made Zen feel bad he wasn’t prioritising the special quest, but he had a
If Zen thought the Shady Merchant was creepy when he was happy, he changed his mind after turning in those shields.“It’s a miracle you managed to rob them of their shields! These things are so fragile that it was impossible to collect any without scratches. You’re a rare gem!”Seeing the Shady Merchant grinning from ear to ear, Zen tried not to think about the nerdy Baron’s reaction to the shields. More importantly, he needed to collect the new quest, visit the kitchen and report the goblin numbers to Gunter. The only thing stopping Zen was that lengthy flight of stairs. Thankfully, he caught sight of Venedict and hitched a hike to the top floor.Although Gunter wasn’t grinning from ear to ear, he also had an extreme reaction, in Zen’s opinion. From behind, Venedict swore his commander had never been this shocked in all his time working together. The soldiers had to work hard on the battlefield, but even they couldn’t d
“Quickly! Over here!” the goblin leader hissed when he saw a figure hobbling clumsily, looking lost on the forest trail.Thanks to the alcohol, the humans on gate-watching duty were drunk. However, the goblins knew better than to climb over that and infiltrate with their numbers. They were adept at ambushing with their upper hand in terrain knowledge and stealing resources for the camp. However, a head-on confrontation was an entirely different thing.Zen hobbled over, pretending to look beaten up as he carried the heavy sack with a broken smile, handing it to the impatient goblins.“I managed to get some leftover food from the kitchen!” Zen announced enthusiastically as the goblin leader opened the sack.Instead of delicious meat, they saw a sack of stale bread as hard as rocks. Seeing red, the goblin leader grabbed a loaf and threw it at Zen’s head. The bread hit the helmet with a loud bonk and bounced off. Zen fell backwards and u
After turning in the slingshots, Zen expected to receive a quest requesting goblin helmets or chain mail. However, the Shady Merchant presented him with the most puzzling request.“Are you sure?” he asked in disbelief. “I’d never seen them carrying staffs.”Honestly, it wasn’t all that surprising. Unlike the other players, Zen had a different method of collecting his war spoils. He only encountered the lower levelled goblins in the forest. Naturally, the sight of a staff was unfathomable to him.“Yes, they do. You can ask your goblin friends about them. Due to the difficulty of the request, we only need 5.”Zen completed the first three missions and received new skills. However, he had questions about the staff.“Won’t it be useless in the hands of a non-magic user?” Zen asked the quest-giving NPC.He understood the appeal for daggers, shields and flimsy slingshots. Those were
Wasn’t there a rule about priests abstaining from worldly sinful pleasures such as sex and alcohol? This priest that the young Baron brought back to his territory resembled a hooligan more than a holy man. Father Clarence would be shocked to see this heathen.“Oi! Are you the lad with impressive medical skills?” the drunken priest greeted and threw another sack of coins on the table, gambling his hand of cards with ladies in his lap.The underaged chef grimaced at how this NPC was sucking tongues with the local barmaid. He didn’t want to think about their complicated sleazy relationship as he wasn’t here to play cupid.“Gunter told me I could find you here. Can you tell me more about your encounter with the goblin shamans?”Sensing that his party for tonight would be cut short, the drunken priest quickly sobered and lost his interest in poker. The barmaid on his lap was rudely shoved aside, and the holy man stood up, towe
Although not much time had passed in reality, Zen spent the next few days in the dungeon hatching his plan by gathering information, pee and poo.“Hello!” Zen greeted as he ‘snuck out’ with a sack of fruit bread he made by borrowing the kitchen. It wasn’t difficult to gather wild berries and some flour to bribe these monsters.Judging from the unusually clean goblins, Zen blinked twice. Were these green monsters usually so hygienic? Then again, his plan must have been working.“Halfling, you have no idea what happened to us. Everyone in the camp, including the shamans and the leader, has been taking baths every day, even if we haven’t taken one in years!”Zen clapped his hands in an enlightened manner, praising their neat and handsome appearance. Almost immediately, a goblin closest to Zen slapped him over the helmet.“Fool! We don’t want to look handsome! We’re goblins, the scary monsters who
Heaving a sigh of relief, Zen thanked his lucky stars. Cursed trees and cursed items were very different. The shamans couldn’t harness the full power of a staff created from a cursed branch without a blood ritual.“I can’t believe you made such a risky plan without knowing the consequences,” Lorren clicked his tongue with annoyance. This was the hero from the prophecy, and he turned out to be a reckless kid. “I don’t know if I should praise your wisdom or marvel at your luck. How did you get this far without knowing anything?”Zen wisely kept his lips sealed. He had a cheat that allowed him to undo most of his mistakes with his death. It was the same cheat that almost killed him, and Liu Feng was right to knock that nonsense out of him in their nightmarish stealth training.From the side, Venedict remained silent. He thought Zen was the least crazy of the three lunatics he knew. However, he was wrong. The runt had to be the mo
Five days passed very quickly in the game, with Zen coordinating internal constructions for a new well. The soldiers toiled without a break in preparation for a huge mission to restock their fortress’ food supplies. Even the women offered to help weave hunting nets and dig trenches for water irrigation.The goblins were rather silent as they prepared for the ritual. According to Zen’s advice, the scout leader made many petty attacks at the side entrance near the forest, leaving deliberate animal carcasses at the fortress’ doorstep for the humans to discover. Zen was nowhere to be seen, and the goblins worked hard to build a floating raft.Eventually, the night of the new moon arrived. As planned, the goblins held their ritual upstream. Gunter sent some of the most talented scouts to confirm the goblin numbers and troop condition. Zen waited by the river with Venedict to intercept the raft while the soldiers went for an all-out night hunting trip to restoc