Flashback-Lexus

Now, let’s get one thing straight, Lexus knew he was a fucking asshole. He never had and never would claim otherwise. All that being said, he’d never seen himself as a truly vindictive person. Not until Azrin’s first claiming ceremony where he was up for selection. The young omega had just turned fourteen and was already being sampled on the auction block.  

Lexus had never felt so murderous in his fucking life. Granted it wasn’t as awful as it could have been. Something he would learn as the years went on and Azrin got closer and closer to aging out. However, at the time, an fifteen-year-old Lexus had to swallow a challenging growl as he watched the pre-rutting teen alpha- Vrestle snub Azrin with a rough snap of his jaws causing the freckled omega to whine and cower. The incident had triggered a pain in his heart the blond hadn’t thought he was capable of.

On their way back to the manor, Azrin cried. While that was nothing new, the silent sizeable tears accompanied the most wretchedly depressed pheromones he’d ever witnessed, wafting off the doe-eyed male; Had Lexus wanting to fall to his knees and bare his throat to the younger boy to do with as he saw fit. Even if it meant tearing the proud alpha to pieces.

“You were right, Lex; I’m not even worth biting. Just a male omega to be exploited for temporary relief,” The freckled male brokenly whispered as the blond moved closer to him in a bastardized attempt to show support. Look, look at what you’ve done to our omega. Imbecile.

No, you’re perfect; and I’m sorry. The words were on the tip of his tongue, but he bit them back with a snarl. He walked alongside the brunet fuming, rage blatant on his face, and unwilling to say a damn fucking thing to comfort the one person he truly gave a fuck about. Sometimes, he wondered how different things might have gone if he’d stopped being such a stuck-up prick and had bowed and begged when he’d had the chance.

Would they have grown up as a courting pair? Would he have lavished his omega with gifts, sweet attention, and well-earned praise? Would Azrin still be struggling to see himself as a worthy partner? A desirable omega? Could Lexus have prevented this from the beginning? Unfortunately, he’d never know the answers to those plaguing questions.

That night, they had gone to their own dens. A dark garnet glow reflected off the white walls of his room, as he stared sideways forgoing sleep. A testament to how distraught the immature alpha truly was. How all he could see when he closed his eyes was the image of his Rin, being penetrated by multiple alphas as the babe of an omega pleaded and cried for the torment to end.

It didn’t matter that they were practically the same age, their fates were drastically different. No one was willing to challenge the fledgling ash blond alpha. Except for his overbearing hag of a dam, that fact had been proven over and over again. Much to his sizable ego’s pleasure.

A quite shuffle at the entrance of his room caught his attention, pulling him from his intrusive thoughts. Wide glowing glassy veridian had him propping himself up and rumbling at Azrin in his doorway. The omega had sought him out, despite his dismissive behavior earlier. The alpha couldn’t help but hope the pretty freckled male had come to him for some much needed TLC. Yet, Lexus dreaded the more realistic option, Azrin had come to him for more abuse.

“Either get in here or fuck off. Don’t just stand there like a dolt, nerd.” He gritted out. Irritated, the omega hadn’t come to him when he’d rumbled his acceptance of the other boy’s presence invading his most private space.

“Sorry, Lex,” the brunet acquiesced averting his gaze and presenting his collared throat as an omega should, before slowly shuffling forward into the alpha’s den.

He waited patiently… Well, as patiently as he could, for the brunet to either come closer seeking physical comfort, or to speak letting the alpha know what the hell he was doing here. Rin, did neither of those things as he rocked back and forth worrying his bottom lip raw in between clenched teeth. Ruby eyes narrowed, before he bared his small fangs in displeasure.

“Why are you here?” he groused out. Trying his best to not be too abrasive.

“I wanted to ask you something,” Rin squeaked out. Cautious green-eyes homed in on his display of fangs.

Lexus sat there and stared, hard. The alpha didn’t even bother to blink as he attempted to wrap his mind around the nerd’s reply. You’ve got to be fucking joking right now. Azrin couldn’t be serious. There was no way he was this fucking dumb, that he would enter an alpha’s den in the middle of the night for a little curiosity.

“Are you stupid?”

“P-probably,” came an instant stuttered reply accompanied with a nervous shiver.

Well, ok then. At least he recognized it wasn’t necessarily a wise decision. Lexus supposed he could indulge him, not like he had anything better to do. “Ask,”

“Am I-I go…good en-ough to havesexwith?” Even in the dark, the blond could see the rosy hue coloring the freckled male’s cheeks.

“What the fuck, Rin? Why the hell are you asking me that?” he seethed through clenched teeth. He knew his own ears were burning hotly in turn.

“We-well I-uh…I-,”

“Spit it out,”

“I’m not worth biting, right? I understand that, even more after today. I just want to know if you also believe I’m not worth sc-screwing,” Azrin avoided his eyes. Deciding to speak to the damn floor.

“Again, why are you asking me?”

“Because you’re an alpha,”

“I can’t even get hard when I want to, idiot. How would I know if you were worth fucking or not?” God, he wanted to nope out of this conversation so hard right now. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to turn the other away.

“You’ve never bitten me either. Yet, you made your opinion on that subject abundantly clear,” Rin was borderline hissing at him right now.

The omega had him hook, line and sinker with that one. The ash blond was treading on thin fucking ice right now and even his alpha fucking knew it. The beast inside him, all but howling at the damage he'd done.

“Rin, I- you shouldn’t give a single shit about my opinion. Alpha or not, I was just being an angry, bratty, awful creature when I said that to you,” He admitted solemnly.

“It was the truth. So just-,”

“No, no it wasn’t. I didn’t mean it! I-,”

“You never say anything you don’t mean,”

“Fuck! I did dammit, I even told you so when I apologized! I was intentionally being cr-,”

“You only apologized because auntie made you. Don’t sit there and try to convince me otherwise. You’re a bad liar, Lex,” Azrin bared his little fangs and clenched fists had the potent smell of fresh omegan blood perfuming the air.

“All this time… you really- you thought I honestly felt that way?” His chest tightened, restricting his breathing. His voice was rough, shallow, foreign even to his own ears.

“Why wouldn’t I? You’ve never given me any reason to believe otherwise,” The brunet shrugged, his face scrunching like it did when he was trying to conceal how wounded he truly was. This was not ok, and Lexus had every opportunity to fix it. His stupid alphan superiority complex could go to straight to hell.

“You’re right. At the time, in that public setting; I apologized like she wanted me to. However, right now in my den, where I am the only king. Where no one is watching or controlling my actions. I am sorry for what I said to you that day. I never should have verbalized let alone thought any of those things. I do not believe them or feel them, Azrin. I was angry, and that does not excuse being intentionally cruel,” He had extracted himself from the sleeping furs and padded over to the omega.

The brunet watched him closely, flexing his arms and legs, waiting for the ash blond to lash out. The caution was warranted, that was for damn sure. Didn’t make the sting of it hurt any less. Once Lexus was standing directly in front of the smaller male, he forced his blood-soaked irises to the ground and bared the left side of his throat.

Azrin gasped and then finally broke his silence. “That was quite an intellectually worded apology for an fifteen-year-old,”

“Don’t patronize me, Ome- Azrin. I may be a shit, but I’m not fucking uneducated. And your one to talk about word usage,”

“I wasn’t berating you. Honestly, it’s the opposite, I am surprised you put that much effort into it,” The brunet whispered. His voice was void of emotion, like he was feeling Lexus out.

“Because I mean it. You want me on my knees to prove it? Just this once- I’ll do it,” And he would, even as he suppressed an indignant growl.

“I don’t need your submission, Lex. I need you to answer my question,” Azrin replied, his eyes flaring brightly with his conviction. Strong omega, even when scared shitless.

“Fine, the honest answer is I have no fucking idea. I know some alphas show an interest in sex at this age; but I’m not one of them. I have no interest in anyone yet, so I don’t know if an alpha would find you satisfying in that way,” He raised his eyes to see the omega’s reaction to his words.

Luckily, the younger male seemed to be mulling over the blond’s response. So, Lexus relaxed his neck and waited. This was never a short process with the nerd. He always had to overthink everything at least twice before he would respond. Well, most of the time, there were others when he’d just motor mouth nonstop no matter what you did.

“Ok, that’s fair. Will you give me a real answer once you are?” Dek- Azrin stated, finally finished with his internal debate.

“I can? I guess? Why are you so stuck on this?” The alpha questioned. For some reason this was really starting to rub him the wrong way. Really though, this subject was something barely passing pre-teens shouldn’t even have to think about. Stupid ashtrays and their archaic traditions.

“Because I’d rather not lose my virginity at the age of sixteen to someone who’s seven hundred years old,” The brunet scoffed rather uncharacteristically, more like Lexus’s own behavior.

“I doubt you’ll get your heat at sixteen, and seven hundred is a bit of a stretch. Regardless, what does that have to do with me…. Me? ME? Out of everyone in this coven, ME? Fuck no. No way in hell are you losing your vir-,” He cut himself off once he actually took a moment to glance in Azrin’s direction. It was the wrong thing to say, and the little alpha had realized it far too late in his panic induced spiral.

“Guess that’s your actual answer. Thank you for finally being honest. This ‘undesirable’ will excuse himself from your sight no-,”

“Don’t- Don’t do that. It’s not what you think, I swear. God damn- Don’t miss understand,” He grabbed jerkily for the brunet as he spoke earning himself a high-pitched hiss and a nasty scratch for his breach of personal space. That was fine, the pain grounded him.

“Let. Me. Go,”

“No. I won’t,”

“I will fight you, Lex,”

“I’m not trying to fight. I’m trying to explain,”

“Then start explaining. Quickly,”

Shit- I- Damn it- I do- don’t deserve that piece of you, that’s what I meant. You should save that for someone special,” He flushed brightly as he spoke.

“Oh? Someone special huh?” The omega caulked his head almost mockingly.

“Yes, someone you love, or an alpha who selects you. I’d want to be my chosen’s first time,”

“Is that your alpha talking, or you as Lexus Burns?”

“Both,”

“I see. I understand now, Lex. Let go, please,” The omega spoke and looked calm.

So, Lexus released him. Begrudgingly, and the omega left without a single glance backward. Without a single form of comfort, and a pathetic apology at best. Lexus hadn’t been honest at all, not even with himself. It would be years later when the memory of this night would rear its ugly head.

By then, the fledgling alpha had grown, not much; but enough to recognize where he’d gone wrong. His words had caused Azrin to believe he could and would never be the blond’s chosen mate. He couldn’t change the past, but he would fight for their future. He would hold on to the beautiful strong male, and he’d make sure the freckled omega knew without a doubt Lexus wanted him and him alone. The carmine eyed alpha didn’t care about the cost to his pride anymore. He was willing to burn it all to the ground; Everything, including himself.