"Mom!" I yelled as I ran downstairs to find the tense woman typing on her laptop with a stack of papers around her.
She was in finance and it was not uncommon to see her trying to ignore me as she worked. She seemed to forget that she had to be at the airport in less than an hour and that we wouldn't see each other again for a long time. It didn't matter. We barely saw each other despite living in the same house, she would only make an appearance to harass me by asking me about my studies or my private life.
"Mom?"
She turned to look at me and gave me a smile, leaving me totally petrified.
Why was she smiling?
It was enough to see my expression at that reaction on her part to realize that I was not used to even the slightest sign of pleasant response from my mother towards me.
It could be considered a typical teenage mother-daughter relationship, where they didn't get along, but it wasn't at all common. We never fought, because she terrified me, just one look from her could make you feel like the most insignificant human being in the world.
"What's wrong Samantha?" she asked in a sweet tone that left me with an even more bitter taste in my mouth. I feared she was planning something or that she was being ironic and then, spit out a complaint.
Or maybe my mother was really in a good mood. How many times had I seen that in my life? I could count them on the fingers of my hand. Just on one hand.
"I can't find my plane ticket, do you know where it is?". I cautiously approached the fridge to pour myself some juice.
"No, but I'm sure your brother does," she looked at me and winked.
That was the moment I went into shock. My mother joking with me? Now that was new. And not reassuring. I'd just recently had a checkup at the doctor, am I going to die or something?
"Okay, thanks."
I practically ran up the stairs, almost expecting that at any moment that woman would go crazy and lunge at me. Overkill, right? Well, when it came to my mother, it wasn't.
I went to find my brother in his room. I knocked twice on the door, but when I got no answer, with the palm of my hand I began to knock repeatedly on the cold wood until he was forced by my insistence to open it. Jhon was one of the most handsome boys in the high school. He had long dark brown hair, green eyes and was very tall. But when he opened the door he was unrecognizable, disheveled, shirtless and pale. The night before he would have been partying with his friends and I was sure he had a huge hangover.
" What's up Samantha?" his nervous tone didn't go unnoticed by me, he was in a bad mood, giving more veracity to the hangover thing. I looked inside his room and noticed there was a girl lying on his bed, every night there was a different girl in his room and Jhon knew I wanted to kill him for it. Playing with girls was kind of repulsive.
"I'm looking for my plane ticket, do you know where it is?". I folded my arms and tried to put on a stern expression, I know it wasn't coming off well at all because he let out a laugh.
"Are you trying to scare me? Don't make that face, it's scary, have you ever tried to put on makeup? You look like a ghost," he leaned against the door frame adopting my same pose.
"How cute and how funny you are. Now tell me where my ticket is."
"That was Mom, wasn't it?" he inquired and I just nodded my head. He let out a big sigh, walked into his room, opened the drawer, took out the ticket, handed it to me and hugged me.
Jhon and I had a strange relationship. We weren't the typical brothers who got along fiercely and hated each other's guts. He had been with me for five years and always looked out for me. He always wanted to take on the role of father with me, since I never had one, he left us alone when I was just a baby. I understand that it was hard for him that I left.
But that doesn't take away or justify that he was very stupid about the plane ticket.
"When are you leaving?" he asked without letting go of me.
"In a couple of minutes," don't cry, Samantha.
"You want me to walk them out?" I looked at the sprawled out girl and shook my head. She deserved the screams I'd give her when Mom kicked her out.
"No, thanks. No need, Mom will take me."
"It's okay. I love you".
"Me too. While I'm gone, don't get anyone pregnant."
"Tell our stepfather he's an idiot."
"I will."
I turned away and didn't look at him, if I did I knew he would cry and I wouldn't want to leave, but I needed to.
I lived in Seattle. I was going to go live at my stepfather's house. He currently resides in England, and we will all be going to live there, but I will be leaving earlier because my studies start soon and my mother still has to get the forms in order so she can move her job to a place in England. My brother decided to stay with her. I had to leave my friends, my home, my life, my brother, but I wanted to go to that university too much, so I made that decision and I believed without any doubt that it was the right one.
There would be my stepfather, whom I hadn't heard from in years, with his unbearable sister and my stepbrother Nick. I considered many times not going there because of them, but mostly because of Nick.
I didn't like any of the three of them. It had been many years since I had heard from those strangers, and you could say that the last time I saw Nick was not particularly pleasant to remember.
He, my brother and I were close childhood friends.*Eight years ago.
"Mommy!" I screamed repeatedly on the floor crying, my throat almost closed and hiccups making my calls for help difficult. No one was coming, so I kept screaming until I heard footsteps coming down the stairs.
"Shit," Nick whispered running toward me, "What happened to you?"
With the bottom of my wrist, I wiped away the tears running down my cheeks, I didn't exactly want him to come to my rescue, I didn't want him to see me cry.
"I fell down trying to grab something off the top of the shelf," I said. Nick bent down and picked up the knee that was injured. It was bleeding. A lot.
"Wait here and I'll get a bandage," he reported, getting up.
"No! Don't go stay with me; please," I was afraid he wouldn't come back. He felt that if people left he would never come back. My father more than once swore to me that he would come right back, but he never does. I knew it was childish, but I couldn't help it, just the thought of my mother or brother leaving made me panic, I didn't want them to leave me.
"Samantha, I have to go get the bandages, I need to fix you," he pleaded. I took a few seconds before I let go of his arm and waited two brief minutes before I saw him again come back to me. He returned to my level to put the bandage on my knee. When he finished, I let out a sigh, it hurt, but I could no longer see blood. It took me a while to realize that even Nick hadn't moved and didn't even look away from my face. I looked closer and his eyes were totally fixed on mine. He moved a little closer to wipe away a tear that was running down my cheek.
His gaze became bright, almost as if he wanted to cry, I didn't understand why. He leaned in my direction slowly until our lips brushed, I couldn't stop him. I didn't want to stop him. Suddenly the brushing went to more. It was a hand on my cheek and lips pressing against mine so tenderly that it made me close my eyes. He kissed me, it was my first kiss.
Pulling away from me, he shook his head repeatedly leaving me confused. He got up as if he had done something horrible and ran out.
*Present.
We never spoke again.
"Samantha!" my mother called interrupting my thoughts. I came downstairs and she was with her arms crossed over her chest.
"Don't yell, I'm here."
The angry expression on her face told me her good mood had gone down the drain. That expression was far more familiar to me than any other. Every time I saw her she always had something to be angry about.
«"Samantha, what does this B mean? "Samantha, did you study hard enough for the exam? "Samantha, you don't have to go out" "Samantha, your friend is not a good influence on you. "»
"Aren't you done with him yet? Samantha we had already talked about this," I held up my hand as a sign for her to stop talking. I didn't understand what she was saying.
"What are you talking about, Mom?".
"Marcos is over there waiting for you on the couch, I thought you were done with him," my mother's disapproval made my stomach churn. I would have to put up with her complaints the whole trip. Great.
"You never said I should be done with him mom."
I quickly made my way to the living room ignoring everything she had to say.
I've been with Marcos for over three years and I'm not breaking up with him. We'll manage to see each other.
"Hi, beautiful," Marcos greeted as he got up from the couch with a smile on his face.
"Hi," I repeated moving closer to him to plant a kiss on his lips. We both sat down on the couch.
I couldn't believe someone like that was with me. He was handsome, attentive, tender and he loves me. I couldn't ask for more
"Do you have everything ready yet?" I wanted to know as my mother paced back and forth around us. She was already anxious.
"Yes... " I sighed as I fiddled with the buttons on my shirt "Have you seen Millie?
"She said she couldn't come say goodbye to you because she cried and you hate it when she does that," Marcos gave me a forced smile.
Millie is my childhood best friend, she is also Marcos´s. She introduced us 3 years ago and said we would be perfect for each other. I remember when she said that we both blushed and were embarrassed all night. After two nights, she asked me out and we became inseparable ever since.
"She's right," I kept fiddling with the buttons on my shirt with no idea what to say, I'm not good at goodbyes and I don't know what I was supposed to do.
"I'm going to miss you too much, I don't know what I'm going to do without you," Marcos announces as he tucks a strand of hair behind my ear.
"I don't know what I'll do without you either," I lean my head on his shoulder trying to feel better, but it doesn't work.
"Are you sure you want to leave here, away from your family and everyone you know?".
I think this is the seventh or ninth time he's asked me that.
"Marcos we talked about it, this is my dream and I'm going to my dad's house, I'm not going to be alone."
"I know, it's
just...".
"It's time to go, Samantha," my mother informs me. I nod and get up from the couch.
"What were you going to tell me?"
He shakes his head and kisses me, a little harder this time.
"I love you," he says as he pulls our lips apart and gives me a hug.
"Me too," I hug him back and we head for the door.
With one last kiss goodbye I watch him walk away down the sidewalk.
"You should be done with him, Samantha," my mother adds from the car with her arms crossed. I roll my eyes and climb into the passenger seat.
A minute later I drive away from the house I grew up in, away from my neighborhood. I'm walking away from my life to start a new one, a life where I'm going to make my own decisions and no longer depend on anyone. I am starting the life of an adult, with responsibilities and worries. I am starting my future.
I have been waiting for this moment forever. My mother was the one who instilled in me that I had to go to college to get a job and have a good career.
I want to major in literature and I think it has been the only decision I have made on my own, without my mother's cries of disapproval. She wanted me to be a lawyer or go into finance like her, but I was never into that.
I can't believe that in a couple of hours I will be in the place my mother and I have always dreamed of. All that hard work and effort is finally paying off and now I will finally be living our dream.
The goodbye with mom was heavy.She asked me about a hundred times if I didn't forget anything and if I needed more time to think about whether I wanted to go to a university so far away from home. A hundred times I replied that I was sure, but she kept insisting until I got on the plane.If I had just said I needed time to think about it, I'm sure she would have given me a speech that I had to be strong and that I was sure I could do it. In short, she only asked me that because she wanted to play the role of an understanding mother, but she never was. She wants that college even more than I do.I slept most of the flight, the sleeping pills I bought myself were amazing. I'm not one to use those things, but I have a horrible fear of airplanes and more so today that I'm traveling alone, at least the other times there was always my mother's wrist or my brother's hand to break.Lacking them, I'll just say that I left a slight sag in the arms of the seat.When I got off the plane I was a
Chapter 3The obnoxious ringing of my cell phone started to be heard all over the room. I took it from the small table next to my bed and put it to my ear still lying down with my eyes closed."Hello...”" Samantha, it's eleven in the morning, are you still lying down? " My mother's voice made me jump up and out of bed."No,”"I told you, just because you're no longer living under my roof doesn't mean you no longer obey my rules.”I wanted to contradict her. Inform her that I'm 18 now and legally I can do whatever I want, but I was going to argue with her again and I'm really not in the mood to do that. According to her rules I should have woken up 4 hours ago."I know, mom. I'm sorry, I was up late getting my things settled in here and I was exhausted, " I heard her let out a big sigh as I rounded my eyes."It's okay, I don't want it to happen again.”«If it does happen, you'll never know.»"I'll know Samantha.”«Damn, she's a witch.»As I held my cell phone to my ear I went to the c
Chapter 4I've been here for three days now and I haven't done anything productive. For example, this afternoon I sat on the couch for three hours watching Friends and only moved from the couch because I was hungry.I turned off the TV and went to the kitchen to get something to satisfy my craving. I don't eat well at all, I have no appetite lately, I miss my brother and my house so much. Being here watching TV on the couch all day is not very pleasant and not fun either.I haven't seen Nick since yesterday afternoon when he locked himself in his room. I know he went out because I heard his door open, but I didn't see him come back.Will she be in her room, should I go find out? Actually, the idea of being alone in this house scares me. It's gigantic for just one person and every time you take a step, you can hear the sound echoing throughout the house.I'm childish, but I've seen a lot of horror movies, okay? Bad things always happen in houses like this and I don't want to have my th
Chapter 5I was never very good at cooking. Yet here I am, trying to make a recipe I saw on the internet.For many months now I have been obsessed with the delicacies that Asians prepare, not necessarily when it comes to raw fish, but cakes and especially pancakes. They make them so fluffy it hurts to look at them and not be able to touch them. God, I swear I'll make one and squeeze it all day until it's inedible..... That is if I don't light the stove on fire first.I have to separate the yolk from the white... Whisk... What else was it?I never had time to devote to this when I was at home, but since I have nothing else to do here other than be on my cell phone and watch TV, I might as well find out if I have any culinary skills at all.Olivia's kitchen was huge, she could easily be on some TV show teaching me how to make these pancakes. It had two microwaves, a refrigerator bigger than four of me put together, a sort of black marble countertop in the middle of the space, where you
‘Chapter 6I was anxious. It was thirty minutes to five o'clock and I still hadn't decided what to wear. If Nick had told me what places he had in mind, maybe, by now, I would have a notion of what to wear.I opted to wear a t-shirt of my favorite band, Paramore, and jeans. I was grabbing my cell phone when there was a knock on the door. From his brute way of knocking, I knew it was Nick and so he wouldn't keep insisting causing my hair to stand on end, I opened it right away."Come in, I'll get my stuff and we'll go," I answered grabbing my bag.Look at what Nick was wearing. He's wearing jeans and a pretty tight t-shirt where I can see his whole chest and abdomen."I'll pay," he commented as I left the room.I shook my head several times. No way. I wouldn't feel comfortable at all. "I appreciate the offer, but I prefer to pay,”"No...”"Nick thanks, but no," I said in a curt tone. I don't like people paying for me, even if it's out of chivalry."Do as you please," He spat and went d
I woke up early in the morning, which was rare for me, considering I loved sleeping more than eating and that's saying a lot.I decided to make the most of the day, take a bath, change and go for a walk around the neighborhood, the weather was perfect and I loved the fact that the sun's rays were nowhere near the sidewalks, it was too early for that yet, besides, the trees were gigantic here, just like the houses.My home was humble, an ordinary house for three people, on the other hand, the houses here, you could fit twenty people and live peacefully without having to see their face all day long.You wouldn't find a single piece of garbage around here, it was all completely clean, as if this place was just there to give a nice decoration to the planet earth.Thinking about the stark differences between Seattle and England made me miss home even more. While I wanted to get away from my mother, I didn't want to leave Jhon. Nor did I want to leave Marcos. And I hadn't spoken to Angel si
I always believed that the butterflies everyone talks about were pure sentimentality, that there was no such thing as someone capable of making your heart beat so loudly that you feared half the world would hear it.I mean, I had a boyfriend; it was clear to me that those sayings about love were an exaggeration brought on by the nerves of starting a new relationship.I thought I knew everything.There was no way I could believe that with a simple touch, the skin would bristle, come alive and become so sensitive. I never believed that a person could make you feel so weak, strong and stupid all at the same time. That was meant for people who are driven by stupidity and immaturity.I never thought I would be one of those people.In high school I was at the top of my class, even if it took me much longer to learn than the others, it was the truth, I spent day and night studying. I had a few friends, it wasn't something that bothered me, I didn't have time for them anyway, I already had al
I woke up early in the morning, which was rare for me, considering I loved sleeping more than eating and that's saying a lot.I decided to make the most of the day, take a bath, change and go for a walk around the neighborhood, the weather was perfect and I loved the fact that the sun's rays were nowhere near the sidewalks, it was too early for that yet, besides, the trees were gigantic here, just like the houses.My home was humble, an ordinary house for three people, on the other hand, the houses here, you could fit twenty people and live peacefully without having to see their face all day long.You wouldn't find a single piece of garbage around here, it was all completely clean, as if this place was just there to give a nice decoration to the planet earth.Thinking about the stark differences between Seattle and England made me miss home even more. While I wanted to get away from my mother, I didn't want to leave Jhon. Nor did I want to leave Marcos. And I hadn't spoken to Angel si
‘Chapter 6I was anxious. It was thirty minutes to five o'clock and I still hadn't decided what to wear. If Nick had told me what places he had in mind, maybe, by now, I would have a notion of what to wear.I opted to wear a t-shirt of my favorite band, Paramore, and jeans. I was grabbing my cell phone when there was a knock on the door. From his brute way of knocking, I knew it was Nick and so he wouldn't keep insisting causing my hair to stand on end, I opened it right away."Come in, I'll get my stuff and we'll go," I answered grabbing my bag.Look at what Nick was wearing. He's wearing jeans and a pretty tight t-shirt where I can see his whole chest and abdomen."I'll pay," he commented as I left the room.I shook my head several times. No way. I wouldn't feel comfortable at all. "I appreciate the offer, but I prefer to pay,”"No...”"Nick thanks, but no," I said in a curt tone. I don't like people paying for me, even if it's out of chivalry."Do as you please," He spat and went d
Chapter 5I was never very good at cooking. Yet here I am, trying to make a recipe I saw on the internet.For many months now I have been obsessed with the delicacies that Asians prepare, not necessarily when it comes to raw fish, but cakes and especially pancakes. They make them so fluffy it hurts to look at them and not be able to touch them. God, I swear I'll make one and squeeze it all day until it's inedible..... That is if I don't light the stove on fire first.I have to separate the yolk from the white... Whisk... What else was it?I never had time to devote to this when I was at home, but since I have nothing else to do here other than be on my cell phone and watch TV, I might as well find out if I have any culinary skills at all.Olivia's kitchen was huge, she could easily be on some TV show teaching me how to make these pancakes. It had two microwaves, a refrigerator bigger than four of me put together, a sort of black marble countertop in the middle of the space, where you
Chapter 4I've been here for three days now and I haven't done anything productive. For example, this afternoon I sat on the couch for three hours watching Friends and only moved from the couch because I was hungry.I turned off the TV and went to the kitchen to get something to satisfy my craving. I don't eat well at all, I have no appetite lately, I miss my brother and my house so much. Being here watching TV on the couch all day is not very pleasant and not fun either.I haven't seen Nick since yesterday afternoon when he locked himself in his room. I know he went out because I heard his door open, but I didn't see him come back.Will she be in her room, should I go find out? Actually, the idea of being alone in this house scares me. It's gigantic for just one person and every time you take a step, you can hear the sound echoing throughout the house.I'm childish, but I've seen a lot of horror movies, okay? Bad things always happen in houses like this and I don't want to have my th
Chapter 3The obnoxious ringing of my cell phone started to be heard all over the room. I took it from the small table next to my bed and put it to my ear still lying down with my eyes closed."Hello...”" Samantha, it's eleven in the morning, are you still lying down? " My mother's voice made me jump up and out of bed."No,”"I told you, just because you're no longer living under my roof doesn't mean you no longer obey my rules.”I wanted to contradict her. Inform her that I'm 18 now and legally I can do whatever I want, but I was going to argue with her again and I'm really not in the mood to do that. According to her rules I should have woken up 4 hours ago."I know, mom. I'm sorry, I was up late getting my things settled in here and I was exhausted, " I heard her let out a big sigh as I rounded my eyes."It's okay, I don't want it to happen again.”«If it does happen, you'll never know.»"I'll know Samantha.”«Damn, she's a witch.»As I held my cell phone to my ear I went to the c
The goodbye with mom was heavy.She asked me about a hundred times if I didn't forget anything and if I needed more time to think about whether I wanted to go to a university so far away from home. A hundred times I replied that I was sure, but she kept insisting until I got on the plane.If I had just said I needed time to think about it, I'm sure she would have given me a speech that I had to be strong and that I was sure I could do it. In short, she only asked me that because she wanted to play the role of an understanding mother, but she never was. She wants that college even more than I do.I slept most of the flight, the sleeping pills I bought myself were amazing. I'm not one to use those things, but I have a horrible fear of airplanes and more so today that I'm traveling alone, at least the other times there was always my mother's wrist or my brother's hand to break.Lacking them, I'll just say that I left a slight sag in the arms of the seat.When I got off the plane I was a
"Mom!" I yelled as I ran downstairs to find the tense woman typing on her laptop with a stack of papers around her.She was in finance and it was not uncommon to see her trying to ignore me as she worked. She seemed to forget that she had to be at the airport in less than an hour and that we wouldn't see each other again for a long time. It didn't matter. We barely saw each other despite living in the same house, she would only make an appearance to harass me by asking me about my studies or my private life."Mom?"She turned to look at me and gave me a smile, leaving me totally petrified.Why was she smiling?It was enough to see my expression at that reaction on her part to realize that I was not used to even the slightest sign of pleasant response from my mother towards me.It could be considered a typical teenage mother-daughter relationship, where they didn't get along, but it wasn't at all common. We never fought, because she terrified me, just one look from her could make you f
I always believed that the butterflies everyone talks about were pure sentimentality, that there was no such thing as someone capable of making your heart beat so loudly that you feared half the world would hear it.I mean, I had a boyfriend; it was clear to me that those sayings about love were an exaggeration brought on by the nerves of starting a new relationship.I thought I knew everything.There was no way I could believe that with a simple touch, the skin would bristle, come alive and become so sensitive. I never believed that a person could make you feel so weak, strong and stupid all at the same time. That was meant for people who are driven by stupidity and immaturity.I never thought I would be one of those people.In high school I was at the top of my class, even if it took me much longer to learn than the others, it was the truth, I spent day and night studying. I had a few friends, it wasn't something that bothered me, I didn't have time for them anyway, I already had al