Chapter Seven

Having been a sufferer of acute claustrophobia for as long as I can remember, I find the black of night frighteningly confining. Since there were no night lights to ease my discomfort and it was far too dangerous -not to mention wasteful- to keep a candle going while sleeping, I had to force myself to acclimate to the darkness.  I managed, but I certainly couldn’t claim to be comfortable in it.  That was when I missed Duncan the most.  He always made me feel so safe.

The following morning didn’t bring me much comfort, other than the light of day. 

Duncan. My heart sank at the thought of him.  I needed to know how he truly felt about me, but how?  He was in the twenty-first century going through his day without any inkling that I’d ignored his wishes and traveled back in time.

To the wrong time! 

Worst yet, I’d done it without the aid of Isabelle.  Now that I’d learned more about the fine Lady Margaret-Jane Chapman, I didn’t know whether I should be angry or hurt. What I did know was that I felt very foolish and taken in.

I moved to the miniature portrait of her on the far wall of the room and looked at her closely. My heart felt like it was made of inflexible lead as it struggled to function.  Margaret and I could have been twins.  Could this be the reason Duncan was with me?  Since he’d neglected to share the fact that I could be his one-time fiancé’s doppelganger with me, I had no choice than to think it true. If he couldn’t have his precious Lady Margaret, then he’d have the next best thing. Me.  I wanted to wring his deceitful neck at the thought of it.

The urge to throw something was too great to ignore.  I looked around the sparsely furnished room and soon thought better of it.  If I’d learned nothing at all during my time here, I’d learned that material goods didn’t come as easily to people in the eighteenth century as they did in the twenty-first.  Even the poorest of poor of the future lived better than most in the past.  There was no Macy’s or Target to shop for clothing and home staples.  Every item of clothing was painfully made by the hand of some half-starved worker and every piece of furniture or decoration the same. Even if the embroidery was done by a noble woman, it took months -not hours- to create.  The room may have been sparsely furnished in accordance to my standards, but what was in it was of fine quality and made with the utmost care.  There was nothing in this room that I had the heart to destroy. I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself from the guilt of it.

I decided to take a walk instead.

The sensation of walking the garden was an eerie sort of comfortable.  Somewhere in the back of my mind I knew where I was going, yet I’d never been there before.  It was an unexplainable “odd” that I vowed I’d focus on at another time.  Right then, I needed all my attention placed on the situation at hand.  I’d been duped by a spoiled aristocratic vampire and may have foolishly sealed my fate if I didn’t keep my head on my shoulders and find my way back to the portal that would return me to the twenty-first century on time.

First things first, I calculated how much time I had left.  This wasn’t as easy as I would have thought since I owned no watch or calendar.  I’d hidden my belongings in a cave when I arrived. They included a battery operated watch.  I’d made note of the position of the sun when I arrived in the event my watch stopped working or was discovered and taken. Once I determined the day that I needed to return to my point of entry, I figured the worst case scenario would be that I would have to get there early and wait until the sun was once again in that same position.

My mind was so preoccupied with making my plans to return home that I didn’t notice the disagreeable Lady Lilith until I’d practically stumbled into her.

If I had any doubt about how she felt about me -or should I say Lady Margaret- the look of pure hatred on her face made it painfully clear. 

“Why do you hate me so?” I blurted out without even so much as a greeting.

Her eyebrows rose in surprise while her thin lips curled in a small semblance of a smile.

“I see your trip was not a total loss. You have returned with a bit of back bone,” she said with a sassy tone.

“Why so?” I asked. 

Although I’d been pulling off the language quite admirably since my arrival, now that I was no longer focused on saving Duncan and was focused on returning back home instead, I found the effort tedious and distasteful.  I longed to speak normally, but wasn’t foolish enough do it.

“You ask why?  Well, my little amnesiac, I shall tell you why,” she practically hissed. “You stole Lord Duncan from me and you know it.  Until now, you at least had the decency to avoid me because of it.  That’s why.  I should have been married to him right now.  I have the power to subdue Lady Vivian’s wickedness. I have proved it on more than one occasion.  I do not understand why Lord Duncan had to fall in love with little Lady Margaret-Jane who cannot compare with me in the world of magic.  You know it, even if the others do not.”  She looked me up and down with a sour smirk and continued, “Frankly, you fail to compare with me in looks as well. I have no doubt you worked a spell on him to get him from me.  When I find him, I shall undo that spell and we shall see then who he truly loves.”

I actually felt a little sorry for the slighted cousin standing before me.  We had more in common than she realized. I knew in my heart that I wasn’t the love of Duncan’s life either. Margaret was. I wasn’t Margaret.  I was Jane.  The thought of sharing this information with her flitted through my mind, but I dismissed it.  I still didn’t know who was who and who stood in what corner.  Until I did, it was better to keep my secret to myself.  I couldn’t have anyone, or anything, prevent me from getting back home.

“I no longer wish to marry Lord Duncan.  If you can find him, you can have him,” I exclaimed with exasperation as I stormed away.

I thought she might follow me after that last statement, but when I glanced over my shoulder I saw she was frozen in place with a shocked look on her face.  I smiled with satisfaction as I made my way to the stables. 

I wasn’t the best of riders, but I could hold my own.  Since it was clear I’d find no peace walking the grounds, a ride was in order.  I also needed to check the cave for my belongings.  Now seemed as good a time as any.

I was given Lady Margaret’s sorrel.  The groom assured me a baby could ride it. I hoped he was right as we meandered off toward the cave.  I say meander because the hoofed sloth keenly recognized that I wasn’t his mistress. It made note of my lack of riding skills and took full advantage of the fact.  No matter how hard I kicked, poked, or begged, we had one speed and one speed only; slow.   Since I was being forced to ride side saddle -which only added to my riding distress- I decided that, as long as we were going in the right direction, I wouldn’t worry about it.

I found myself going over the chain of events that led me to this moment. The table talk at dinner echoed in my mind.  Lady Margaret-Jane, who was she really? Although she seemed revered by the majority of the people seated at dinner the night before, clearly the view wasn’t universal. Conversing with Lilith proved that.  I found myself wondering what happened to her.  Did she make it to the future?  Was she still alive?

My conversation with the earl haunted me.  Was it really that dangerous to go into the future?  What would happen to me when I stepped through the portal to return?  Would I survive the transition?  I’d made it back in time with little mishap.  Was it different going ahead in time?

I was so engrossed in thought that, before I knew it, I was at the opening of the cave.  I dismounted and tied my horse to the nearest tree.  Considering the enthusiasm for moving it didn’t display during my ride there, I doubted it would go anywhere if not tied, but it was better safe than sorry. I still hadn’t gotten used to the type of footwear they wore and I had no desire to try walking five miles in the heeled riding boots I was wearing.

After making sure I was alone, I pulled the brush I’d shoved into the opening of the cave away and crawled into the cramped hollow.   I was barely able to fit my body into it curled up, but I still classified it as a cave.  I felt around for the wide crack that I’d stuffed my things into and found them still there.  They were a little damp, but that was to be expected, considering the length of time they’d been shoved into the earthen crack.  I shuddered at the thought of wearing them back, but knew they needed to return with me as well in order for the spell to work correctly.  The last thing I wanted was to leave a part of me behind, even if it was something as simple as my belongings.  Any connection would give someone with magical knowledge the power to pull me back.  From what I’d gathered at dinner the night before, there were quite a few people in that category.

I returned the brush to the cave’s opening and wiped as much soil as I could from my riding habit with my hands.  I was thankful that the quality of the wool my costume was made of was exquisite and surprisingly stain resistant.  It took very little effort to clean off any signs of my crawling around in the cave.

Moments later I was mounted on my horse and heading back to the estate.  It wouldn’t do to be gone so long that they would start looking for me.  While the ride to the cave took seemingly hours, getting home felt like it was only a matter of minutes.   It was.  Once my horse realized the direction we were headed, it had a sudden burst of life and we moved like the wind. Fortunately, I managed to gain control of my balance and stopped flopping around on the saddle like a rag doll by the time we reached the stables, so I wasn’t too embarrassed when the groom who that waited to assist me witnessed my return.

I relinquished my mount and walked as steadily as I could as I made the long trek back to the main house. The estate was enormous.  I couldn’t imagine how many millions of dollars it would sell for in the twenty-first century if it managed to survive being sectioned off by developers.  Although I agreed that no one needed this much land, I had to admit I was enjoying the grandness of it all and would probably miss it once I was back in the bustle and chaos of modern day Manhattan.

Without warning, a slight tingling ran up my spine.  I stopped for a moment and looked around. It felt like there were eyes on me everywhere, but I saw only people engrossed in their task at hand.  No one seemed to be staring in the way I felt they were. 

It was very strange.

I had a few more days before I could enter the portal and return home. Curiosity dictated I find out as much as I could about the woman I’d been mistaken for; the Lady Margaret-Jane.   Assuming that the more prevalent clues to who she truly was would be in her suite, I headed up the stairs.

I’d almost reached the door to her rooms when I came face to face with Isabelle as she stepped out of the shadows. I couldn’t believe my eyes!  A slight squeal escaped my lips as I hugged her tightly.  Never had I been so happy to see anyone!

She placed her hand over my mouth and made a “shush” sound as she pulled me into the shadows.

“Quiet!” she said.  Her tone was soft, but urgent. “They must not know I am here.”

“Oh,” I replied, clearly confused.

“Where are your rooms?” she asked firmly.

I pointed to the door.

It was only after we’d padded our way as fast as we could across the short distance left to my rooms and were securely behind closed doors that she spoke freely.

“What a foolish thing you did,” she scolded.

I looked at my feet in shame. 

“No more foolish than you coming to get me,” I replied softly.

“Duncan is in a rage,” she continued as she paced the floor. “I had all I could do to subdue him when he discovered what you’d done.”

“I don’t want to hear about Duncan,” I said with an impatient scowl.

“What?” Isabelle asked with surprise.

“I know about Lady Margaret-Jane Chapman,” I said as I pointed to her portrait on the wall.  “Isn’t it a convenience that I look exactly like her?  It must take some of the sting off losing her like he did.”

“You have no clue what you are saying,” she said softly.

“Don’t I?”  I hissed as I reverted back to my native Manhattan tongue.  “Why didn’t he tell me about her?  Why?  Was it because if I knew that I was a suitable substitute… a fill in… I’d leave him?  Because I am, you know.  As far as I’m concerned, Duncan and I are toast.”

“You cannot mean that.  Do not say such things,” she said as she wrung her hands and continued to pace.

“To think I thought he loved me…. me… not her. I even risked my life to come back here and help him. The worst of it is, I missed my mark.  I’m too late.  He isn’t even here,” I said, a little louder than I should have.

Recognizing my emotions were running dangerously high, I started breathing deeply to help calm myself down.  It wouldn’t do to have the household staff rushing in to see what was the matter.

“He never asked you to do this.  He never wanted you to do this.  You cannot blame him for your folly,” Isabelle said quietly.

I looked at her closely for the first time since we’d entered the room.  She looked tired and old, much older than I last remembered her.  It suddenly dawned on me that she’d risked her own life to come to me. 

“How old would you be right now?” I asked hesitantly.

“Do not worry about me,” she replied.

“Are you losing your magic?” I gasped.

“It is fading,” she moaned.

“Oh no.  Why did you come?  You have to go back!  Go back now!”  I wailed.

“I cannot.  My magic is not strong enough to take me back. You must do it for both of us,” she said softly.

“What?  I don’t know how! I couldn’t even send myself back to the right time.  I’ve barely learned enough magic to claim to be magical.  I’m a baby at it!” I blurted with despair.

I couldn’t believe what she was saying.

“You are more than you think,” she said breathlessly.

I rushed to her side.

“Are you alright?” I asked in a tone that bordered on panic.

“I must lie down,” she panted.  “I just need a little rest and then I will be fine. The transfer here was exhausting.”