Chapter 4: I reject you.

The pack doctor changes the bandages on my legs and looks up, smiling at the bubble of activity in the packhouse. 

The grandest wedding the pack has seen in the last ten years will be happening tonight, but I won't be attending because my verdict has been served.

My things have been neatly packed, ready to be moved to a cabin at the edges of the pack territory. A bitter feeling rises at the back of my throat but I push it down.

It’s better for me to leave. It’s the only way this is going to work.

Tonight, they become husband and wife. 

I have to move out of the pack and head to my new life.

The pack gradually empties as everyone goes to the wedding ceremony. Those who haven’t been invited to be guests have to be there to work. The packhouse has never been this empty and fatigue pulls me into a deep sleep.

The evening sun is peeking through the blinds when I feel the presence of someone beside me. 

I feel his hot body on top of me.

My eyes snap open in alarm but my body already knows this heat. It already recognizes his scent. Nikolai is still in his three piece wedding suit. He still smells like rich perfume and pack festivities. Heavy alcohol and bubbling champagne.

He’s drunk.

His lips, as they make contact with the side of my neck snap me to reality and I can feel the haze of his desire surrounding us. 

“Nik.”

He doesn’t stop. 

Nikolai kisses a path down my neck, drops a kiss at my chin, and then when our eyes meet, I see his are not just filled with alcohol and desire, they’re filled with anger too. Undeniable anger that snaps me out of my daze and fills me with the strength to finally push him away and escape from under him. 

Nikolai releases a growl and reaches for me, but he’s too drunk and I'm too far away.

Nikolai makes an attempt to come at me again but he fails. I keep a safe distance between us and speak with as firm a voice as I can, “Your mating ceremony with your new Luna is tonight. I refuse to be caught in the crossfire again. I won’t be a third wheel, so go back to your bride Alpha King.”

I say the words as respectfully as I can. He’s no longer Nikolai Night to me. He’s Alpha Nikolai Night. This is how it has to be if I'm going to survive.

I watch as Nikolai rolls over onto his back on the bed. He stares at the ceiling for a while… and just when I think he’s coming to his senses, Nikolai laughs.

He lets out humor filled laughter and i wonder what it is he’s laughing about, but it’s all too clear. Nikolai gets up from the bed and stalks towards me, eyes suddenly clear and movements coordinated and steady. All the drunken fumbling from earlier is gone and the moment my back comes into contact with the cold wall Nikolai stops and glares down at me.

“You’re always going to be caught in the crossfire, Emery.”

His words aren’t the words of a man who’s drunk. 

They hold the softness of pure honesty, and from the solemn look in his eyes I can tell he’s not lying. A sudden surge of frustrated anger fills me and I spit at him, “You’re a psycho.” 

Tears sting my eyes but my voice is hard and firm as I ask, “Why can’t you live your life with her… and let me go? From now on we should go our separate ways. I’m still young and I deserve to have the chance to find someone suitable for me too.”

“Someone suitable?” Nikolai’s eyes harden and ice over. His voice is soulless as he asks, “And who might that be?”

A realization hits me.

 He’s never going to let me go. He’s always going to keep me here, his locked up little pleasure slave.

“I reject you Alpha Nikolai Night.”

It feels like time stops. 

The swaying of the curtains, the rustle of the trees, everything stops and I'm left only with the sight of Nikolai’s face, eyes which I could have stared into forever, now harder than a winter’s night. It breaks my heart but I go on.

“I Emery Goldthorn, reject you Alpha Nikolai Night as my fated mate. For the sake of your pack and your duty as Alpha, you have to take on a new Luna, so you can’t have me anymore. You’ve always been a good Alpha… so be a good Alpha now and do what you have to do.”

Our bond is pulsing right now. Thrums of power, waiting for Nikolai. 

We haven’t been mates for that long, It’s only been… three years. Compared to werewolves who have been mates for as long as they could remember, we can still break our bond. All we need to do is say the words. This will be painful but fast, and there’s nothing we can do to avoid this.

“I Alpha Nikolai Night, reject you Emery Goldthorn,” 

I release the breath i’ve been holding in, but Nikolai pauses wickedly, “...from ever stopping to be mine. 

Despite my marriage, you’ll always be mine, Emery.” 

What? I look up to see Nikolai smiling. There’s no confusion or remorse on his face. 

Before I can ask what he thinks he’s doing Nikolai walks out of the room and shuts the door.

That bastard!

My emotions get the best of me and pain steals my breath away. I stalk back to the bed, tears running down my face and my heart in a twist.

Just his fated mistress, never his wife. 

Never his equal as a mate.

It was never a problem to them or to the members of our pack that I didn't have a wolf. It only became a problem here.

Loud heavy knocks come from the door and snap me out of my thoughts. With tears still running down my cheeks I get up from the bed, righteous annoyance and anger filling my blood. If Nikolai thinks he can do something so heartless and come back to me like I'm some sex doll… I open the door and my heart stops.

It’s not Nikolai.

The glint of silver steel catches my eyes. A knife.

I look up to see a hooded figure. From the uniform I can tell he’s one of the guards but something doesn’t feel right about this guy.

“Hello, Emery.”

His voice sends a chill down my spine. 

I try to shut the door but the intruder barges his way in. The moment he does, he clicks in the locks and turns to me, a cruel glint in his eyes.

“The only way to break a mate bond is through the death of one’s mate. For the new Luna to have him, you have to die.”

He looks up and I see cruelty behind dull, soulless eyes, “Say hi to your parents for us.”