Ch. 4

The next few days passed in a daze, I was trying to process the information my mother had given me, and she was trying to hover as much as she could while running the diner. I wish I could tell her that I was okay and nothing she told me was affecting me, but now more than ever I had a million questions, if he knew about me, did he really not care enough about my mother to even meet me? Did he just not care? What about his family, did they know? So many questions, and no one could give me the answers I wanted. Every single google search I had done over the last few days turned up empty not even an obituary, I was stuck, it seemed like this was all the information I was ever going to get. I sighed in frustration and looked over at my clock- it was 11:48 pm, in just twelve minutes I would be 18. Tomorrow night I would be at Tays house while the majority of our graduating class got drunk and got ready to kick off their last summers before all going off to college. And in a week, I would be on my way to Blackbird academy in Louisiana. I should be excited for this chapter in my life, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that nothing was ever going to be the same again.

              I woke up the next morning and groaned as I turned over, every single fiber of my body felt like it got hit by a bus.

“Good morning my amazing 18 year old!” My mom shouted as she came into my room holding a plate of chocolate chip pancakes and bacon- my favorite.

“Morning mom.” I mumbled while reaching for the plate, I winced as my muscles felt like they were on fire.

“Are you okay sweetie? You don’t look so good...” She said while reaching over to feel my forehead. “You’re burning up, let me go grab the thermometer.”

I looked down at my plate and usually my favorite food would make my mouth water, but my stomach churned, I tossed the plate as I ran for the bathroom.

“Charlee, are you okay? I’m really worried.” My mother’s voice infiltrated my tiny bathroom, “Can I come in?”

I was looking at the remnants of last night’s dinner in the toilet, “You better not mom, it’s not pretty. I’m sure I just ate something that didn’t agree with my stomach.” I hear her outside the bathroom pacing. “Mom, really I’ll be fine after a few more hours of sleep.”

“Charlee… you aren’t pregnant are you?”

I snorted, I hadn’t even been properly kissed yet, a few drunken make out sessions that were way to sloppy and uncoordinated at parties, let alone lost my virginity.

“Mom, I can promise you, there is absolutely no way that I am pregnant.”

She sucked in a loud breath, “Okay sweetie, I’m going to make some chicken soup for you and leave it in the fridge. I have to go to the diner today unfortunately, Sandy called out sick- again.”

“Its fine mom, I’m not going to be any fun anyway.”

Sometime later I was finally able to drag myself over to my bed and fall into a restless sleep, I dreamt of myself standing in what appeared to be a huge foyer, those that are in some kind of castle. It was cold, the kind of cold that seeped into your bones, not even the huge fire in the middle of the room could bring any comfort. As I looked around the room, I noticed there was red paint that appeared to be coming from the ceiling… as I reached out to touch it as it was dripping down the walls I realized it wasn’t paint, but blood.

I woke up mid scream to my phone going off, I grabbed it off my bed stand, “TAY” flashed across the screen, crap.

“Hey tay, what’s up?”

“What do you mean what’s up?” “It’s almost 5 PM and I haven’t heard from you all day, hello? It’s your birthday party tonight!”

“Don’t be mad, but I can’t make it, I’ve come down with the flu or something.”

“That’s such bullshit Charlee, you’ve never liked parties, and now you’re trying to back out.”

“Really tay, even call and ask my mom, I wouldn’t lie to you about this… I really am sorry, we can do something next week before I leave.”

“You know what? Don’t bother.”

“Tay-“and I was cut off by the dial tone, well that went well. I was too tired to worry about that right now, I closed my eyes and drifted off once again into an uneasy sleep of blood stained walls and cold stone rooms.

The next week passed in a blur of pain, I was sick throughout the weekend and Monday and Tuesday weren’t much better. Today I was pretty sure my fever had broken, and was finally confident enough to eat, my mother was fussing about how I should contact the school and tell them I would be arriving a few days late, we were supposed to be leaving tomorrow to make it by Friday. I told her that there was absolutely no way I would be late to my first week at college, mandatory or not. She huffed and puffed about it, but eventually she caved in and we were at the point now where every time she saw me she got tears in her eyes and muttered something about me “growing up way too fast.”

I was in my room packing up the last of my things, when my eyes glanced over to my acceptance letter from Blackbird.

             

Dear Miss Jones,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted into the prestigious Blackbird Academy followed by a full academic scholarship, room and board, and meal ticket. Please be aware that we open campus the first week of June to all students, we here at Blackbird realize what a difficult time this must be for you and your families, and we are here to make this process as easy as possible. While this is not mandatory, it is highly encouraged, especially for those of our freshmen class, we will be offering workshops and tours as well as one on one meetings with our professors and upper classmen so you have the opportunity to discuss and decide which areas of study will best suit your needs. Included is information on your scholarship, codes of conduct, and instructions to the school.  Please don’t hesitant to contact our head administrator Mrs. Hendersen for any and all questions. 504-(555-0987)

We look forward to meeting you

Headmistress of Blackbird academy

Mrs. Lafouex

The rest of the night was bittersweet, I tried calling Tay but no answer, I figured she would take a few weeks to cool off and when I came home for a visit, we could go on as if nothing happened. I finished packing, and once everything was all packed up into the moving truck, it hit me that tonight would be the last night I spent in the house I grew up in. Regardless of everything that my mom went through, she still loved me every day, and did the job of two parents. I would never be able to repay her for all she’s done. I headed inside to spend the last night with the only parent I would ever need.

Morning came fast, and we were running around trying to make sure I hadn’t forgotten anything, and before I knew it, we were in the moving truck with the only home I’d ever known fading fast into the review mirror and Blackbird academy 15 hours ahead. Mom and I fell into an easy silence, I think she knew I was nervous and didn’t want to add to my anxiety. Somewhere in Alabama mom finally had enough of the quiet.

“Charlee, I know we haven’t talked much about your father after you found out the truth… I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

I sighed, “Mom, do we really have to do this?”

“Yes, Charlee, we really do, once I drop you off you’ll be so busy with classes and meeting new people that you won’t have time to deal or heal, I want to make sure you are okay.”

“I don’t know mom, it’s not really the story I was expecting, but I am glad I know the truth.” I kept my eyes forward, afraid that if I looked at her she would see the untold truth in my eyes, that my father not wanting me was eating me up inside.

“Charlee…”

“Mom, please, can we not? Even if it’s not okay now, it will be.”

“Fine, but when you’re ready to talk, I will be here.”

I must have drifted off to sleep, I woke up to my mother shaking me awake

“Hey baby, we are here.”

I looked out the window, my jaw dropped, Blackbird Academy wasn’t at all what I expected, it looked like it was plucked off a hillside in London and transplanted here right in the dry heat of Louisiana. It wasn’t a college, it was one huge castle surrounded with a bunch of little castles, and the only thing that was missing was a mote and a draw bridge.

“Yeesh, this is impressive, intimidating, maybe a little scary, but impressive.” Mom let out a whistle

“I’m speechless.”

“That’s a first, come on, let’s go get you checked in.”

I looked at the clock on the dashboard, it was a little after 630 pm.

We headed up towards the main “castle” it was hot and humid, and I was already sweating by the time we reached the doors. I paused as a chill ran up my spine, I could have sworn I felt someone behind me, “Charlee…no…” I spun around expecting to see someone behind me.

“You okay?” Moms’ eyebrows were kinked together- she looked worried

“What?”

“Are you okay? You’re white as a ghost.”

“I…I’m fine, I must be dehydrated or something. I could have sworn I heard someone say my name.”

Her frown deepened, “are you sure you’re okay? You were just sick, we can check into a hotel tonight and start fresh tomorrow?”

“No really… I’m okay, let’s do this.” I grabbed her hand as we passed the threshold of the place I would call home for the next four years, but I couldn't shake the feeling that someone or something didn’t want me here.