I had not slept all night I was sure of it. Instead alternating between sitting and pacing around Seren’s room while my Aunt tried to sleep in her seat. I mean, these seats were far from designed to sleep in, but at a push you could manage a nap for a short while if needed. But for me, sleep was not going to come no matter how I tried. My mind had been over-run with thoughts of the things my Aunt had said, and I knew from that moment I had to act upon them.
Upon waking I had been forced to make polite conversation with my Aunt as one of the nurses brought us breakfast as they had done each morning since our arrival in the pack hospital. Familiar faces to them now, and they were kind enough to be trying to take care of us as well as their actual patient. Time seemed to be dragging...
I had waited for the short time I would have where Aunt Sophia returned to her home to take a shower and change her clothes. It had become part of her daily routine
I felt like I was drifting. Floating. In a state of nothingness. I did not like it. But I did not know how to get out. One moment I had been striding down the main street of our local city, planning the first leg of my journey. As well as having picked up an application form for the local university. Then I was here. Stuck.It had been one hell of a day, but I had took on board the things Lachlan had said. Even researched it a little too. Being apart from your fated mate was going to be difficult, but then, being near him was likely going to be even harder, so I decided I would allow myself the trip I wanted. Not the long, travelling trip I had been planning, but a shorter, more of a vacation sort of trip, with additional ones in the future. Before enrolling for further education upon my return. Living away from pack for most of the week, returning home at weekends. Sort of the best of both worlds. Giving me the much needed space I was craving, as well as be
My body once again felt like it was frozen in time as Seren lay there looking over at us. Her big brown eyes looking like they were focused upon me, while I was vaguely aware of Marcus calling her name. After everything she had come around. She was finally awake.I felt a swift punch to my arm. “You lost all fucking ability to think straight?” Marcus muttered, snapping me back to reality. “Going to mark her and then can't fucking talk now she is here.”Seren attempted to shake her head but I noticed her wince in pain, her hand moving toward her neck, and she stopped herself, every movement seemingly hurting her. I moved across the short distance from where we stood to her bed. “Don’t move Ren, if it hurts stay still, yeah?” I urged her. “Do you want some water? I imagine you must be thirsty.”“Maybe we should check with the doctor first.” Marcus said. “Damn woman, you had u
It broke my heart hearing Lachlan be so open and honest about things to me. In all the years he and I have known one another never do I recall him talking so freely with me. I felt honoured he trusted me to share some of the things he had, because I doubted many others knew of the things he spoke of. And, while the things he said may have hurt, in my mind there was nothing to forgive.I never knew he had struggled that way. I certainly never knew he had felt so alone. Growing up side by side, being so close, yet I was clueless of his struggles. Guilt flooded my body that he had endured this alone. I knew how much he loved his Mum, and how close they were, so hearing him say he had to witness her fall apart in secret was soul destroying. He was a young boy. But this was through no fault of my Aunt's either. Circumstance had brought them to this. Lachlan would have been struggling with the loss of his Dad and needed support, and likely feared he could not seek
Well I had not been wrong, the moment I closed my eyes to get some rest, my Mum had been in, And now she would not leave me alone. In the end I had to ask the doctor to tell her to leave because I needed some peace. My entire body had ached and my eyes felt so heavy. But more than anything my heas banging from the amount of talking from my mother. Maybe there were advantages to being in that odd state between being here and not. Because it meant I didn’t have to listen to my Mum telling me all the pack gossip. And, having been unconscious for days, it meant there was even more to catch up on!After finally being able to relax a little and settle to some silence my peace was disturbed once more as my older brother strode into my room. He looked anxious and on edge. Oddly there had been little else but silence since his arrival because Cole was sitting by my bed now, watching me through narrowed eyes and barely speaking a word. I was unsure why he had co
I had returned to my family home, a place I had not returned in the days since Seren’s accident, and took a shower. The warmth of the water feeling like a welcome relief upon my aching body. Having slept within that hard and uncomfortable hospital chair for far too many nights my body was not doing too well, and I feared Tyr was becoming weaker.His communication with me was lesser. And it had been sometime since I had last shifted. My priorities of course had been sitting by the bedside of Seren until she awoke. Now that had occurred I could try to take care of both her and myself. Begin to put things right. I knew we may have a long road ahead, but I swore I had seen something within her eyes when I mentioned proving myself to her. I just hoped I was capable of it.Fate had always been something in the back of my mind. Part of our life cycle, but something for the future. Nothing I was in a hurry for, I guess you could say. I was always a bit
I had laid within the now familiar walls of my hospital room looking around, losing all sense of time. I could not help but wonder where Lachlan had got to. Yes, he had said he would give me space, but what exactly did that mean? I assumed, giving everything else he had said he would be returning later that day. Maybe the next. But here we were, or here I was, days later and there was still no sign of him. I would not lie, it hurt.And, I felt like a fool for ever allowing it to hurt. Not to mention to have allowed, once again, my hopes to be built around anything Lachlan Lamont had said or done. He said he could change. He said he was a good guy. All things were pointing to nothing having changed. And, forgiven or not, I was finding it increasingly harder to view him as a good guy. Despite me craving the company of Lachlan, I still had company; and plenty of it too. My Mum continued her dai
It was destroying me not doing as I had wanted, and as I had promised and, being by Seren’s side as she healed. I had desperately wanted to prove to her I was not the monster she likely created within her mind… or my bad behaviour and treatment had created. I wanted to prove to her I could be a good man. But, I was respecting the wishes of my Aunt, and more so my mother.These were the women that had been a greater part of my life growing up, and I respected their opinions as much as I did my Uncle as a former Alpha. And, as much as it hurt, I knew they may well be right. Seren did deserve better. My wolf had been right all along and my bad choices, be it through lack of information or not, had caused me to lose my mate. Now I was faced with dealing with the consequences.Tyr had retreated to the nether reaches of my mind. It was strange to say I even missed his sly digs that I had grown accustomed to. The lingering that he had done previ
Marcus and Cole had come to the hospital to collect me. I was finally able to leave. Relief was not a word to describe it. I did not know how to explain it, for it simply felt like time had been paused, yet I had been here for an eternity. The same four walls of a room begin to feel like a prison despite the fact you are not being forced to stay there. I think I knew every part of that room in far too much detail. But, the moment had come for me to be discharged with my body all but healed.There were still the occasional niggling pain, or ache depending upon how I moved, but it was nothing I could not cope with. The doctors had reassured me I was well on the way to a full recovery. I had been told I had been lucky. But, I did not feel lucky. Far from it. I had chosen not to consider all of that though. I had a future to focus upon, and thanks to Marcus, his mate and my planning, I was able to do that.“Still don’t agree with this.” Cole grumbled as h
I woke with a start, shocked to find Lachlan looking down at me, an unreadable expression upon his face. He was leaning against the wall of the cabin, his arms crossed, and those big, beautiful dark eyes of his were watching me intently. Should I be freaked out he was watching me sleep? Maybe... yet oddly, I found it almost reassuring... I rolled over on the bed to face him, stretching slightly as I did, and his eyes observed every slight movement of my body“What is wrong?” I questioned, noticing for the first time since my arrival here that the rush of heat upon waking had lessened. I had to hope that could only be a good sign...Lachlan offered me a questionable smile, before shrugging slightly. “Nothing, Ren. Why would something be wrong? I just came to check you were okay. You have been asleep a while.”I nodded. That seemed plausible. I had no clue how long I had been asleep. It felt like sometime since I had come
I walked back through the now familar trees surrounding the cabin,my phone to my ear. "So you don't think it was as strong?" I questioned.The supply drop had been completed a short while earlier by Colton, but I had waited until Seren was resting until Ileft the cabin to go and collect, as I had done each time previously. I did not want to leave her when she needed me, nor did I want any other wolf in close proximity to my mate whilst she was in heat. But, from what my friend was telling me, that may not be too much of an issue now."The scent has certain dissipated. I think another day and it will have gone. Is she feeling any better?" He asked.I chuckled. "I don't think she would tell me either way, Col, she is making me guess at best. Anything but admit she is struggling. Shows weakness, right? Seren will not let me think she is weak." I told my friend, who in turn began to chuckle too."Damn, that sounds like somebody I know. Hmmm,
Pain. Heat. Tenderness radiated through my body. As did warmth. No, not warmth, boiling, temperatures. Hours? Days? I did not know now. I was in a state of confusion. Agony. Discomfort. Sobbing. Screaming. Crying one moment, yelling the next… I did not like this. How was this a normal state for anyone or anything to be in?!‘Why won’t he help us?’ I wailed to Maia. She was our wolf, why could she not talk to his wolf? Surely he could convince Lachlan to surrender to the matebond again. He had done it before. This good-boy image did not suit him. If he would surrender to the matebond we could ease this pain. Put an end to this suffering. It may even bring us closer...‘We have gone over this. So many times.’ She snapped, and she was right. I had begged her so many times, and I had argued this point with Lachlan too. He was not about to give in to me. He was determined to do the right thing. Why he deemed this the ri
I saw pain and anger flicker across Seren’s face at my words. I had expected nothing more. I had known the moment I had chosen to say those things that it would be the last thing she would be wanting to hear. She had sought me out for a reason. I was her mate. She knew the relief her mate could bring when in heat. Angry with me or not, she was willing to bypass that to gain the relief she needed. But, I was not willing to sink to that. And, no matter the pain nor anger I was causing her, and hating that fact, I knew I had to do this. It would be too easy to give her what she craved. But it would be wrong. We were not together. Yes, we may be fated mates, but we had agreed not to be together. I had surrendered to the matebond before, and in doing so I had hurt Seren and regretted that massively.I knew she saw this as me trying to hurt her, but it was me trying to do the right thing. Thankfully, with Tyr being absent resisting her was somewhat easier as
My whole body burned. It ached like never before. And now added to that was the delectable scent of my mate. I am sure it smelled stronger than it had previously, or was that what happened when a she-wolf went into heat? He smelled divine, I knew that much. I was desperate to be close to him. Rip those close right off his body…But Lachlan had stepped away from me. And now his eyes were dark, with a frown etching his face as he avoided my gaze. What was wrong with him? This was not how I had imagined this woud go. The last time we had seen each other he had wanted to talk. And all the times he and I had been intimate Lachlan had been unable to resist. He was insatiable. My scent should trigger that, I was sure of it. I had imagined the moment he caught a note of my scent and realized I was in heat he would pull me to the cabin and rip my clothes off. Make up for the time we had lost. Ease the pain I was feeling...But, just now he had stepped away from me. That
The silence was deafening, and frustration rushed through me at the fact Seren had not replied. I know it had to have hurt her that I never went back to the hospital. I had sworn to her I would prove myself and because of my Aunt telling me to stay away, and my mother agreeing I had gone back on my promise to Seren. I had failed her yet again. Was it any wonder that she would not trust me now? But, my Aunt's words had hurt, and I did as she asked, especially when my own Mum had backed her up. Family meant everything to me. But, now I relaize that maybe Seren meant more.A matebond is something to be cherished. And I had tossed mine away so easily. A choice I would forever regret. I should have gone to Seren. She deserved better. I should have put the matebond first and done all I could to fix the mess my fucked up brain had created. Her and I could have been good together. The moon goddess clearly believed so. My heart ached once again as I thought it all ov
I was tired. Sleep rarely found me, and despite it now being what I assumed was likely early evening I was laid upon the bed within the cabin staring up at the now familiar ceiling. I should be out enjoying a run, or cooking dinner, anything but lounging around doing nothing, but instead here I was, wanting to try to sleep again because I felt I was becoming weaker as the days went on. This was never a good position for a werewolf to be in.This was what more of my days were becoming. Days merged into one another, as did the hours now. The only way I could differentiate between day and night was the colour of the sky outside. My sleep pattern was fucked so I simply slept when I could, which was less and less of late; creating an ever increasingly tireder version of myself. Tired and weaker.I was slowly losing any will to live, and I feared that could be because Seren was gone. I had fucked up, and I had fucked up big time. But, I was scared it may be
I awoke on my bed, in sheer confusion, and a raging rush of heat charging through my body. I felt sick. My head hurt and I felt drained. This was not a pleasant feeling. I was sure I had been in the lounge of the packhouse only moments ago had I not? It had been light outside had it not? Now as my eyes wandered to the window the sky was a mixture of altering hues as the sun was going down... just how long had I been out of it?!I attempted to sit up but my head spun as I did, and heat flooded my body. Nausea sat heavy on my stomach. I quickly laid myself back down, closing my eyes tightly wishing I could fall back into the heavy sleep I had clearly just woken from. At least while sleeping I was not being forced to endure this hell...I could hear raised voices outside of my room. My Mum, My Aunts, Marcus and Cole. Why were they all here? And was there any need to be shouting? From what I could hear they were discussing me. Of course they were. What el
Aunt Alena’s desperate eyes were watching me. I could see the pain and desperation within her gaze and it made me feel bad for her. She was waiting on an answer from me, I knew that. But, in all honesty, what answer did I have to give? No answer that was going to ease the pain she was feeling, that was for certain. I had no clue where Lachlan was, or why he was acting this way. I had tried to mindlink him as I left only for him to ignore me. No, I did not reach out to him otherwise, but that was purely because I could not handle the disapointment of looking at my phone only to see he had once again not responded...What could I tell my Aunt? All I had done was follow the orders he had given me. That did not paint her son in the best way, and I did not want to make her feel worse than she already did. I had a feeling enough bad things were currently being said about Lachlan as it was, and they had to hurt Aunt Alena, I did not need to add to that. Lachl