4 - New Beginning

I wake again not knowing anything about myself, I frown as I look into the bathroom mirror and try to smile, but my heart hurts and feels empty.  I know that I don’t know who I am but why do I feel so heartbroken.  Do I have a family and maybe that’s why I feel this way, is there someone out there even looking for me?  Do I have a boyfriend?  I look into the mirror and shake my head, if I did, they would walk right by me and not recognize me.  I put on the clothes that the nurse provided for me and sat on the bed. 

To say I’m scared is an understatement, I’ve been here for 6 months they say, healing and gaining strength, they’ve giving me a new face, and now believe I should be able to at least work and get a place to stay.  They’ve helped me so much by providing me with a name and ID, of course it was done through the proper authorities.  I don’t know if I even finished school, what if I’m not even 18 but that’s what they have put on my ID.  Dr. Richards has a friend that has a small coffee shop up the street who has given me a job and says I can sleep in the back until I earn enough money to get my own place.  I guess it’s a start and since I don’t know who I am, or how I used to live it’s not a big deal, I’m just grateful to get out of this hospital. 

Dr. Richards walks me to the Coffee shop and introduces me to the owner, he’s an older man, with thinning grey hair, his belly hangs over his pants but he has kind eyes and talks with a funny accent.  “Hi,” he says, “My name is Joe,” I nod to him, and he turns his head and calls out, “Marie, come meet your new helper,” he smiles at me.  “Marie is my wife, she’ll show you exactly what she wants you to do, okay.”  He turns to Dr. Richards and walks behind the counter to get him a coffee. 

I stand there looking around as a woman walks out of the back, wiping her hands with a towel.  She is wearing a hair net over her dark brown hair, she smiles at me, and it reaches her big brown eyes, “Hi, I’m Marie,” she tilts her head to the side looking at me, “your eyes are gorgeous, very unusual.” 

I nod and whisper, “thank you, I’m here  to work and live in the back, so I’m told.”

She blinks at me and gets closer to me, “pardon, I’m sorry but could you repeat that, my hearing isn’t so good,” she smiles as she leans closer.

I repeat myself to her but add, “they gave me a name, Kelly but they call me whisper.”

She giggles, “I guess they would, not to worry dear,” she looks me up and down, “do you have any belongings?”

I shake my head, “no, only what I’m wearing, and the hospital gave me some toiletries in small bottles,” I sigh, “I’ll wash them every night till I can get some different clothes, I promise I won’t offend your nose.”

Her eyes widen at me, “okay, how old are you?”

I shrug, “they say I’m 18 but I don’t know.”

She furrows her brows and walks up to Dr. Richards and pulls him outside.  I watch through the storefront window as her hands fly all over as she speaks to him, she’s not yelling or I’d be able to hear her, for some reason I have amazing hearing and smell, maybe because I had the bandages over my eyes for so long and my other senses kicked in better.

She walks back inside and smiles at me, “you will come home with us and stay in our home till I’m sure you can live on your own,” she shakes her head and mumbles, “stupido, idioti, asino’s.”

Joe yells out, “Marie stop cursing sweetheart what’s got you so upset,” he looks over at me and my eyes widen.

She turns, “that hospital, they just push this young girl out into the world, she doesn’t even know how old she is, where her people are,” she turns and looks at me, “you don’t even look like a Kelly,” she shakes her head. 

I bow my head to her, “I’m sorry, I’ll just go.”

She spins, “no, I’m not angry with you Whisper, you sweet girl will be fine, I will make sure of it, so will Joe,” she glares at him, and he nods.

She takes me in the back and smiles at me, “I have some clothes at home that we can fix to fit you until we can go to a thrift store and buy you some things,” she smiles again and nods.  I walk over to the sink and roll up my sleeves and start washing the pans that are in it.  Theres music playing and I can’t help but sway to it, it’s beautiful but I don’t understand what they are saying.  She speaks as my back is to her, “you don’t understand what they are saying, it’s Italian but you like the music, I see you moving to it.”  I nod as I continue to wash the dishes.

I finish and look around and grab the broom and start sweeping up, she smiles at me, “you’re not lazy that’s for sure,” I smile at her and continue.  At 5:30 they close and lock up the door and I follow them to their car.  She opens the back door, and I slide in as she gets inside the front.  As we drove, I stared out the window, passing buildings and then we were in a more wooded area and my body relaxed more.  I smiled as they pulled into a small cottage in the woods and parked.

 I opened the door and stepped out, Marie spoke as she walked towards the door, “it’s not much but it’s all ours and we love the privacy out here, it’s quiet, except for the animals sometimes, but we stay in the house when we hear them in the distance.  I look at the outside, it has a wraparound porch with a swing on it and 2 chairs with a table in the middle, the house is stone with a metal roof, I look at the door and smile, it’s red with a moon shaped glass at the top.  For some reason the door makes me feel at ease, or maybe its just being in nature.  She opens the door and waves at me, “come on, I’ll give you the grand tour then if you like you can come sit out on the porch, until dinner is ready.

I walk in behind her and into a small living area, to the right is a small dining table and kitchen, she leads me down a hall and opens the door to the right, a small bathroom, with a sink, toilet and a shower/tub, then she points to a door opposite it, “this is our room,” I nod and she continues down the hall and opens a door, “this is your room.” 

I smile, “thank you, it’s lovely.”  I step inside the small room, it has a twin bed up against the wall, a small dresser and no closet, there’s a window above the bed with a pink ruffle curtain. 

She smiles, “it’s not much, but it’s better than the cot in the back room of the shop and I won’t worry about you.”  She walks to the dresser and opens it, “look inside here, if you find anything in here that we can alter let me know.”   She walks out and turns, “you can do whatever you want as long as it is daylight, but please don’t go outside at night, there are many things in the forest, and you could get hurt or lost.”  She walks off and I look around the room and exhale.  I walk to the small dresser and open it, there are a few dresses, and I pull them out and hold them to me.  I open the top drawer and find all kinds of sewing items and smile.  I sit on the bed and begin altering the dresses, I have no idea how I know how to do this, but it seems to come naturally.  Maybe I’m a fashion designer, I giggle to myself, yea a teenage fashion designer that’s who I am.  I giggle at myself, I guess I can be anything I want to be, except who I once was.