Why does this feel better and better?The first day he touched me felt good, but not like today. The second day I felt a hundred times better, but not more than now. Maybe it's because I didn't want to do it before, and now I'm convinced that I want to keep feeling it, I want to find out what's beyond this, I want to know that place that he promised to take me to, I want to find out.Or maybe it's just because I haven't felt these two feelings combined before.I don't know, but it feels so good. . .I feel as the heat begins to flood my body and that feeling in my belly that I still can't decipher increases with each of your movements.I have my eyes closed, just because I don't think I can keep them open for long."Do you like it when I do this?" he murmurs near my ear.My back bends involuntarily and a moan escapes me that I can not stop in time when it accelerates its movements a little. I bite my lower lip forcefully trying to silence that sound emitted by my mouth before mutterin
I don't. . . What rules? We never agreed on rules. . .Why did I have to say that? I hate myself and I hate my mouth. Damn it. . .Oh, I don't have to say that. . ."Are you angry with me?" he inquires, in a playful tone.That's when I realize that I have my arms folded over my chest and my brow frowned in indignation.The truth is, it bothers me that he stops right now. Let him do it again. I already agreed, he's supposed to finish what's left unfinished, isn't he?"I'm the one who should be upset with you for all the times you've made me hot" Giggle a little," but I don't because I know you'll soon reward me for those days" Bite his lower lip and wink at me.Reward him? What?"But, listen," he goes up to the bed and sits on the edge. He signs me with his hand, telling me to come closer. I obey and sit beside him."If I don't please you enough. . . , I mean, if you didn't let me please you"corrects me "You can do it yourself. . .""To do what?" I dare ask, for I have not understood a
I don't know what to do. I don't want to do what he asked me to do. It's very embarrassing and awkward for me. I've never done it, I don't even have a clear idea how to do it. Why did he ask me that? Why did he do it if he knows perfectly well I don't want to? Maybe that's why, maybe it was because he wanted to "punish me" for having soiled my mouth with those words, as he said. I shouldn't have said that. If I hadn't slipped away now, I'd already know what it's like to get to that place you promised to take me to, and I wouldn't have to find out for myself. How will it feel to be there? He said I'd like it. Although I'm still not quite sure what he means exactly, I guess it'll feel good to get there, for him to get me there, not to do it on my own. But, to be honest, I'm anxious to get to the end and know what it feels like. He's done it three times already, he's left me like this three times already, he's stopped for one thing or another and he leaves me wanting more. I know th
I close the door as slowly and cautiously as I can so my mom won't listen to me.I've already checked it out. She's completely asleep. With the pills she takes before going to bed, there's no one to wake her up. My brother's not home. He always goes out at night when Mom's already asleep. I don't know what he'll do while he's out, he never wanted to tell me when I ask. He always makes me swear I won't say anything to Mom and I'll keep my mouth shut. I end up doing it because maybe later I can use that to my advantage.I go back to my room and lie down on the bed.How am I going to do that? How am I supposed to take my picture?I have so many doubts and questions. I wish he was here to help me.The shrill sound my phone makes when a message arrives pulls me out of my self-absorption. I get up from my position and sit on the bed so I can pick up the phone from my bedside table.When I go to notifications I see that I have a new message. I open the app and, in the preview, I see that I
MaryliseYesterday was too much. I still can't believe I did it, that I dared to do it. It was so fearless of me, but it felt so good. It's strange because even though I know what I did was wrong and it's something that shouldn't be done, it was definitely exciting.I still wonder what would have happened if I hadn't stopped. I intended to finish, but I was afraid of getting hurt or getting hurt in any way. I don't know if doing that is a good thing, but it does feel good.A sigh escapes from my mouth when my mind evokes the memory of yesterday. To imagine him touching me and making me feel like that is simply vibrant.Why do I feel hot every time I think about it? Why do I feel the need to do it again?No, it wouldn't be right to do it here while he's just under a foot awayYes, we're on our way home right now. He hasn't said a word since he got into his car. I don't know if that's good or bad. isn't he going to ask me something about what I did yesterday? Did I do something he didn'
I turn my gaze down before I say: "I stopped. . . , I stopped because I was afraid"I know it sounds stupid, but I don't want him to get bored with me. I don't want him to think I'm a scared, I don't want him to think that i'm just a little girl who can't do what he asks of me, I don't want him getting someone else for that."Fear of what?" he asks, frowning and still in his earnest voice."To hurt me." I mean, looking at him without raising my head."And why did you think that?"Why doesn't he stop asking me questions and give me my reward now?I take a deep breath and answer: "Because my legs started shaking a lot and. . . and it was burning too much, I thought that was not normal, so I stopped"I look at his face and notice that it has changed a bit upon hearing my answer. I don't feel him angry anymore, but I can't figure out what that expression is in which his face has been immersed.The smile that peaks in the corners of his mouth makes me feel, somehow, a little calmer since I
Marylise. I can't stop thinking about what Harry did to me yesterday. The way he made me feel. Maybe that's why the lines in my notebook are blank, maybe that's why I've focused fifty percent on classes compared to how I did it before I met him. Perhaps that is why professors have come to my attention several times over the last few days. I think being with him is affecting my academic performance, but as long as it doesn't affect my grades, it's okay, right?, I don't know. Well, I think that's something I don't care about at all, because it feels really good to be with him and it makes me feel all that. I have to find a balance between study and. . . fun, as you call it. I can't help but smile when I think about it. He always says, "Let's have fun" or something. It feels great to have fun with him. I better pay attention to the class. . . The shrill noise produced by the break-out bell makes me come out of my pondering abruptly, causing me to make a small jump in my seat. Now t
My hands begin to tremble and my heart beats arrhythmically. I feel anxious, lost, and I feel like throwing up. "Put it to me, won't you?" she says, biting her lower lip slightly. I couldn't help but look at her in disgust at the same time as I feel my face burn.Shall I introduce her? Who the hell does she think she is?"Are you talking about Harry?" inquires Delilah, more confused than before."Oh, his name is Harry. . . nice name," says the girl, with a stupid smile on her face. I don't like this girl.I have to get out of here, I don't want to be asked any more questions I can't even answer. I don't want them to find out who Harry really is."I have to. . ." I get up from my seat quickly and take the tray of food in my hands. "I have to go" I announce to almost run out of there.I hear Brent and Delilah calling me, but I don't listen to them. I just need to get some air. I need to get out of here.I throw the leftovers of my food in the trash and leave the tray in place before I