Chapter 4

I had no reason to cast myself another look in the mirror, but I did it anyway. And as I lingered there for a while, the reflection of my figure faded into thin air and instead, images from my life began to play before my eyes.

If this was the universe that planned my life, then it did a bloody great job.

I masked my face with the veil before Ethan could notice my tears. I knew for certain that nothing could change his mind. He absolutely hated me. Which led me to believe that, maybe, it wouldn’t matter to him if he called the wedding off, and perhaps, he was doing this because he had found an excuse to hurt me.

Of course, he would never agree to that. But I knew for certain that he could go to an extent as that if he knew that getting married to him was the last thing I wanted.

“Are you done?”

I nodded in response. And there he stood in all his glory with not even a worried crease disturbing the calm aura around him. His nonchalance almost created a ripple of frustration within me.

I couldn’t help but remind myself why I had ever agreed to marry him. The words he used to instigate me into marrying him still sounded so fresh in my mind. How he had reminded me that if the word gets around that I had a part to play with Lindsay’s elopement, nobody would want to work with me.

Luke, Lindsay’s father, was a brutal man. I was aware of his wicked ways and his merciless treatment of those that opposed him. My word or Ethan’s would hold no weightage against his power as I was but a mere budding artist. I could lose everything I’d tried to build on my own in a span of a day.

“And even if Luke were to excuse you, the word would go around and no production house would want to work with you,” Ethan told me.

“And how will marrying you help that?”

“Because then, you won’t be Skylar Summers who helped her friend elope but Skylar Summers, Ethan Parker’s high school girlfriend, who married him after being together for seven years.”

My jaw dropped, “That’s the image your going to paint in others’ heads?”

“What’s there to lose?” He said, “It’s going to save both of our asses. I cannot afford this PR nightmare, and neither can you. My company is in shambles right now. We’ve been trying to protect that secret but we can only do it for so long. Once more investors start withdrawing their support, I’ll be left with nothing. I need this marriage.”

“Ethan!” I cried, “Do you realize what this means? We’ve split seven years ago for a reason. Can we afford to have this marriage? I’m not ready for a marriage right now, much less with you!”

“You think I want this?” He questioned calmly. “I have no choice. I am forced to make this decision, and I assure you, I dissent this more than you do.”

“What is Nick going to say about all of this?” I mumbled to myself in agony. “And dad. Oh, God! It’s going to break his heart.”

“They will understand.” He said, “If you speak to them, they will understand. It’ll take time, but they’ll come around. The world won’t. Your career and mine won’t.”

I released a sigh of frustrations. I hated that he had an answer for every qualm I had, and although they were logical, I still didn’t like them. “What if we can’t make it work?” I asked, “This isn’t how people getting married. So many marriages fail despite the couple being in love-”

“Who said anything about making this work?” He frowned as though I had introduced an entirely foreign issue to our current conversation, which I later realised that I had. “This is a marriage of convenience. When we reach a point where we can’t stand eachother anymore, we take a divorce and go separate ways.”

I was well aware of him and how he worked. I knew that he meant every single word he said and that he wouldn’t hesistate before making it all come true.

But the question was, did I have the power to fight back? No. I knew all too well that I stood no chance against him in this battle. He rendered me powerless and I knew that I was utterly helpless right then. I simple had no choice but to obey him.

He was capable of putting me in a mess that I could never come out of. He was also capable of ruining the career I had always dreamt of having. It all seemed worth the marriage. Even if I had no clue whether I was ever going to come out of it.

I closed my eyes and tried not to think about how the world would react to this news. How would my brother take this news? How would my friends take this news? How could I ever explain things to the media? It worked for Ethan as he never disclosed who his bride was. It was a surprise even to the people who came to visit the wedding here. The odds were definitely on his side today.

And Luke. He didn’t want to disclose this matter earlier either since he perhaps anticipated something like this would happen. Very few members from Lindsay’s side were going to attend the wedding. Taking the chance, Ethan even asked Luke not walk me down the aisle, saying “Lindsay’ wanted to walk the aisle by herself.

I had my wedding veil over my face, which provided a very unclear image of my face. My hair color matched with Lindsay’s, so it was a plus. I wore the exact same wedding gown she was supposed to be wearing. I had put my face down most of the time, until we reached the altar. I was aware that these things wouldn’t prevent people who knew Lindsay from speculating if I were truly her, but it will also not show enough proof for them to get up and stop the wedding.

Before anything could happen, I would have already said my vows.

The wedding procedure began as soon as we came since we were already running late. I didn’t care about what the priest was saying since I tried my best to hide my face from Lexi, Ethan’s sister, who surely found me familiar. Our vows were exchanged sooner than we thought, and then came that moment.

I wasn’t ready to bring back all of my burnt feelings with a single kiss that was essential to bind our marriage. But I also had no say in this. With my consent or not, the groom has to kiss the bride. As soon as the priest asked us to seize our marriage, Ethan hesitated just like I did. But he also realized that with every passing second, he was creating more speculations.

He held me by my waist and planted his lips on me.

It was a strong force that glued us together and neither of us dared to move. We remained rooted in our place due to the impact. I couldn’t speak for him, but I knew well what I was feeling inside.

It was as though I had untied the knot to the memories I had deep buried down. The ones that haunted me every night when I slept, every time I tried to move on and every time I tried to let someone else into my life. I felt as though I had been chained to them, and now, right now, I was finally get rid of them.

I felt liberated.

Because, just for a moment, whilst his kiss transcended me away from reality, I let go of all the qualms I had previously had, and claimed what I had been yearning for the past seven years.

I hated him, but I also needed him. I had never loved anyone the way that I loved him, which was why he was the only thing I have ever wanted so intensely in my entire life.