Chapter 3 - Ben's POV

*One Month Ago*

“Babe we need to get the nursery done!” Chelsea was in a mood today.

I could tell it was getting close because she was starting to do what I’ve been told is nesting. She would freak out about the smallest things not being done, or if she felt we didn’t have enough of something for the baby. Right now she was freaking out because I didn’t have the crib put together yet. She had a list a mile long for me to do.

Now don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed doing all of it, even the 2am runs for ice cream or pickles. I did everything she asked of me. It didn’t matter what time it was or what I was doing. I dropped it all and ran to her or for her. I even put my alpha training on hold for the rest of her pregnancy so I could spend more time with her.

There were times, like right now, where she would drive me up the wall though. No matter what I did, it wasn’t right or in the wrong spot.

“Babe, listen to me.” I said calmly while taking her hands. “I am going to step outside for just a minute to get some fresh air. Ok?”

“Why?” She asked almost sadly. Ugh these fucking hormones!

“I’m just getting flustered, and just need to clear my head for a moment.” I said trying to remain calm.

“I’m doing it again ain’t I?” She asked looking down at our hands.

“It’s not you Chels. It’s the hormones from the pregnancy. Let’s just both take a breather and then come back and finish this. Ok?” I asked.

“I guess I am hungry. Do you know if there’s any pickles in the kitchen?” She asked looking back up at me.

“You don’t even have to go down the stairs babe. I bought a mini fridge and stocked it with pickles, ice cream bars, and apple juice.” I smiled at her.

“Seriously?! When did you do that?!” She asked getting excited.

“This morning while you were out.” I smiled even bigger. “Go on then, go snack. I will only be a moment.”

Chelsea headed to our room while I went down the stairs towards the front door. I was walking around the yard around the pack house when one thought led to another and I realized that we hadn’t even talked about baby names yet. Isn’t that usually the first thing that comes up when you find out your mate is pregnant? I headed back up to our room to find Chelsea sitting on the bed, finishing up an ice cream bar.

“I got a question. Have you already picked out a name for the baby?” I asked sitting next to her.

Her eyes shot wide open, “Shit! No I haven’t! How could we forget that!?” She asked.

“Want to talk about it now?” I asked.

She nodded her head while licking the leftover ice cream off her fingers. We cuddled up on the bed and started throwing out ideas. We had talked about naming him after our fathers but everybody always did that. We wanted his name to mean something. That’s when our ideas took a turn of their own.

Somehow we got to talking about Jax and his story. Chels felt like it would be a strong name, and there’s no one else in this pack with that name so there wouldn’t be any mix up of kids with the same name. Well we ended up taking that another step further.

I had text Cheyenne to see if she could find out what Jax’s father’s name was. From the little he had told us about him, he sounded like a good man with a good heart. Cheyenne was able to find out and told us that his name was Darian. Chelsea fell in love with it instantly. There was no trying to change her mind on this one. So that’s when we decided to name our pup Darian Jax. I just hoped that big lycan Jax wouldn’t kill us for it.

*Jax’s POV*

When I heard my father’s name, I thought I was going to lose it. I never really did get any time to grieve his or my mother’s loss. I loved both my parents. They always did everything they could to make sure that I had a decent life, but at the same time they didn’t just give me any handouts. I learned about hard work, and to this day, I still thank them for that. All the memories of my parents came flooding back to me, from the dark corners of my mind, all at once.

“Hey, you ok?” a soft whisper in my ear asked.

I looked over to see Tora kneeling down next to me with a worried look on her face. I smiled and nodded before inhaling her scent to calm my emotions. I looked around the room to see everyone looking at me with worried looks.

“Thank you.” Was all I could say. I was afraid if I tried to say more my voice would crack and I would turn into the biggest blubbering fool you’d ever seen.

“If you’re not…” Ben started but I stood up from the chair I was in and walked over and gave him a hug.

“It’s perfectly fine.” I said before I let him go. “I just need a moment. It’s been a really long time since I’ve heard that name. I’m just going to go collect myself and I’ll be back.” I smiled and gestured towards the door.

“I understand.” Ben said and Chelsea smiled.

I walked out of the room, through the double doors to the waiting room, and then out the main doors. I found a bench off to the side of the hospital and sat down. All the memories of my parents still floating around in my head.

“Father, Mother. I know I haven’t talked to you since you’ve passed, and for that I am truly sorry. Please forgive me. I know you guys are up there and have been watching over me all these years. I just hope that I am the man that you wanted me to be. I hope that you are proud of me and who I have become. Granted I didn’t turn out to be a surgeon or nurse like you guys did, but I have saved lives in my own ways. I have also taken many lives, and looking back now, I’m not very proud of some of those. Some of those people didn’t deserve to die but I had my orders.” I was talking to the sky. I didn’t know if they could actually hear me or not. I guess there was some pent-up emotions that just came flooding out.

“You know your parents might be gone from this world, but they live on through you.” Tora said sitting down next to me.

“They died trying to save my first mate and me. Our village was under attack and we snuck onto a ship to Scotland. They never made it off. I guess I’ve always sort of blamed myself for their deaths.” I said now looking at the ground.

“Their deaths are not your fault honey. Any parent would give up their lives for their child.” Tora tried to reassure me but I wasn’t sure if it was working.

“There’s just to many what if’s. Like what if I gave them my portion of food or water? What if I just simply traded them spots?” I started rambling out all the what if’s that were going through my mind.

“Honey, stop! You can’t keep blaming yourself. They knew what they were doing. They were in the medical field so they knew what the consequences of their choices were. They wanted you to live so they made sure that would happen. Remember it’s never goodbye. It’s just an until we see each other again.” Tora said laying her head on my shoulder.

“I guess you’re right.” I sighed.

“Always am.” She smiled.

“Smart ass. You’ve been around Alida too long.” I rolled my eyes and she laughed.

We sat there for a little while longer in silence, just letting the sun beat down on us. Tora had been the one to suggest going back inside first, to which I agreed. She led me back to Chelsea’s room where everyone still was. They all looked at me to see if I was ok. When I smiled and nodded, they resumed their conversation.

After all the new baby fuss was over, the four of us headed back to the packhouse. Alida and Gunner were both tired from their travels and didn’t waste any time going up to their room to take a nap. Tora and I headed over to our soon-to-be new house to work on it some more. At this point all we had left to do was get the new flooring down inside, all the trim work around the windows and doors, and the new siding on the outside. We were hoping to move into it sooner rather than later.

We had been working on laying the new flooring down when I got a call. I pulled my phone out and looked at the caller I.D. Charlie’s name popped up on the screen.

“Hello?” I answered.

“Jax, how you been?” Charlie asked.

“Well I’m still on the green side of the grass and breathing, so I can’t complain.” I shrugged.

Charlie laughed, “That’s a good way to look at it I guess. I called because my friend has agreed to meet with Tora about taming her dragon. She wants to meet up tomorrow. Does that work for you guys?”

“Works for me but let me ask Tora before I say anything else.” I said.

“Good idea.” Charlie laughed again.

I slid the phone down to my shoulder and walked over to Tora. “Hey Charlie is on the phone and his friend, who I told you about to help tame Maggie, wants to meet tomorrow. Is that ok with you?”

Tora looked at me wide eyed, “So soon? I didn’t think it would happen this soon. Yes! We can meet them tomorrow. Have them come here though. It’s secluded enough, that if I shift I shouldn’t harm anyone.”

I nodded my head and smiled at her before returning the phone to my ear. “Charlie? You still there?”

“Yes sir I am.” Charlie said.

“Tora said that would be great but asks that you guys meet us here at the new house.” I relayed Tora’s request.

“That’s perfect! I will let my friend know!” Charlie said.

“Awesome. Thanks again Charlie.” I said.

We hung up the phone and I got back to work with Tora. She said we were not stopping today until this new flooring was in. The sun was already setting, and I wanted to get back to the apartment.

We finally finished getting the new floor down and packed things up. Once we got back to the apartment, I face planted on the couch. Tora slowly laid on top of me and started rubbing my shoulders.

“Honey, I’ve been thinking.” Tora said softly.

“Oh Goddess. I thought I smelt something burning.” I rolled over under her so she was now straddling me, just in time for her to smack my arm.

“Not funny.” She said sticking her tongue out.

I laughed at her reaction, “What’s on your mind hun?”

“Do you ever want kids?” She asked.

I sat up slowly, “Of course I do hun, but not until you’re ready.” I said as I rubbed her arms.

“I’m worried about their genetics but after holding Chelsea’s pup today…” She looked off into nowhere.

“You got baby fever don’t you?” I asked.

“I think I do.” She looked back and smiled.

“I was actually going to ask Charlie about it while you were working on taming Maggie.” I said.

“Were you seriously?!” She looked excited.

“Yes, but again I didn’t want to say anything until I had answers. I didn’t want to get your hopes up. But my question is, even if our offspring comes out as a lycan with wings, would you still want to have kids with me?” I asked.

Tora thought about it for a minute before answering. “Of course I would. It would definitely make life a whole new adventure for us.” She smiled.

“I guess that’s one way to look at it.” I laughed.

“What about your dad though?” I asked and her laughter stopped immediately.

“I don’t care about him or what he thinks anymore.” Tora said climbing off of me to sit on the couch herself.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean…” I started.

“It’s fine. He never loved me as his daughter. He only saw me as a pawn to use to get what he wanted.” She said looking right at me.

“We never did talk about that text you got from the blocked number. Do you know who it was?” I asked reaching for her hands.

“It’s either one of my sisters, or dad got smart and is talking in the third person.” She shrugged.

“Do you trust your siblings?” I asked.

“Not really. They all cater to our dad for the most part. I was the only rebellious one, as they call it.” She said.

“Rebellious? What do you mean? The text called you a chicken shit.” I said getting angry again.

“It’s a code that a couple of my sisters and I came up with a long time ago. When one of us was trying to do something we knew dad wouldn’t approve of, we would text each other calling the other a chicken shit so if dad ever went through our phones, it looked like we were on his side.” She said.

“Oh. That makes sense then, I think…” I trailed off scratching my head.

“I always wanted to leave that place. I wanted to travel the world, meet new people, make new friends. Dad didn’t approve of the idea and put me on lockdown when I tried to leave the first time.” She said now pacing back and forth in the living room.

The thought of someone putting my mate on lockdown had my lycan seething with rage. It took everything I had to reign him in.

“Then how did you get out when we first met?” I asked.

“My sister helped me escape.” She stopped, looking back at me. “Look, please don’t be getting mad about what has happened to me in the past. It’s the past and there’s nothing we can do about it now.” She softly grabbed my face and kissed me.

“You won’t ever have to live like that again. You are completely free to do whatever you want now. I am not going to put you on lockdown. I will show you what being love is supposed to feel like.” I said getting up, wrapping my arms around her waist, and pulling her into me.

“You already have honey. I would have never of thought that this is how my life was going to turn out, but I am happy now. I still feel a little anxious sometimes about all this freedom and what you might think about some of the things I do.” She admitted.

“Listen, I love you for you and all your quirkiness.” I smiled.

“Quirkiness?!” She asked in a shocked way.

“Oh don’t tell me you don’t find some of the things I do weird.” I retorted.

She thought about it for a minute and then said, “Fair enough” with a smile.

“Make you a deal. We will talk to Alida about your whole father issue together. Get her take on it and then decide what we are going to do after that. But first, you have training tomorrow and we both are in desperate need of a shower.” I smiled wiggling my eyebrows.

Tora laughed and slapped my arm again, “Horn dog.”

“Hey I’m doing my best to hold him back.” I shrugged as she walked away towards the bathroom.

After we had both showered, separately might I add, we crawled into bed. She immediately through her leg over my waist and one of her arms around my stomach, pulling herself as close as possible to me. Once she was settled, she started running her fingers along my chest again like she did every night, while I ran mine threw her hair.

“Jax?” She asked softly.

“Hmm?” I hummed in response.

“How long do you think it’ll take to train Maggie?” She asked.

“Hun let’s not worry about that right now. Remember, any doubt she senses in you will only make this harder. I know you can do this, and when it’s done, you will truly be completely free.” I smiled and kissed the top of her head.

“I can’t wait for that day to come.” She yawned and was sleeping within minutes.

I knew tomorrow was going to be total chaos with having to fill Alida and Gunner in on everything that had happened since they’d been gone, mainly some issues reported from other Alphas that they claimed were not time sensitive and could wait for Alida’s return. Then after that, we were meeting with Charlie and his friend to start taming Maggie. To say I was nervous but also excited at the same time would be an understatement.

I was just on the edge of letting sleep take me over when my phone lit up and caught my attention. I reached over to the nightstand and unlocked it. I had a notification of two new text messages.

Alida (11:37pm): Meet us in the Alpha’s office at 7am.

Me (11:42pm): Roger that!

I closed out her thread and when I looked at the other new text message my eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

Blocked Number (11:41pm): Reject her and send her home or suffer the consequences! Last warning mutt!