TiaraMy body screams in protest as he backs away and I want nothing more than to pull him back to me.“We shouldn’t be doing this,” he growls, pinning me under his gaze.Nodding, I pull my hair away from my face. The knot I tied earlier loosened up while we kissed so I tie it back on top of my head.“You’re right,” I agree in a whisper, “this is absolutely wrong.”“It’s crazy.”“It’s erroneous. You should leave.”“I should leave,” he agrees, “It’s only for the best.”None of us move an inch.I cross my legs, in an attempt to stifle my stimulation. His hands clenches and I know he is making an effort at gaining control.“Everything can go wrong,” he explains.“Uh-huh.”“We’ve got to keep our head in the game.”“The game is all that matters.”A second passes, then two.Shaking his head, he mutters, “I am officially a jerk,” then his hand shoots to slide around my waist, pulling my body to his in one quick motion that has my head reeling. I don’t have time to recover before his mouth ta
RyanHer hair is a soft tangle, splaying and fanning out wildly across the pillow. I watch as the first lights of dawn dances across her face, illuminating the gentle rise and fall of her chest with each peaceful breath.I’ve watched her sleep before, all those nights we spent as friends in her dorm room when she slept either with a pen in her hand or sprawled against a bunch of textbooks.But watching her now is different. Which is as well because we never had sex during those freshman year days. Watching her, it’s like I don’t want to stop, it’s like if I watch her long enough then I can delay the reality of what just happened from hitting me.I slept with Tiara. Despite every shred of common sense telling me to walk away, I couldn’t stop myself. It’ll be better for me if I had some kind of regret or guilt, at least that’ll make me feel less of a jerk. A sign that I’m not completely devoid of conscience – and that thought alone might just spare me from feeling like a total monster.
TiaraI wake up with a goofy grin on my face.I don’t even realize it till I’m standing in the bathroom mirror, staring back at my smiley reflection. I mentally slap myself, wiping the grin off my face. It’s not like it’s the first time I’ve had sex.But to be fair, it is the first time I’m having that kind of sex.The kind that makes you want to combust into a thousand different particles of heat and never come back.Picking up my toothbrush, I look back to my reflection and –And my brows shoots up together in mild shock.My hand automatically flies to my neck, running my fingers across the red-almost-purple bite marks that are a sharp contrast to my pale skin.I gasp loudly. I have a hickey! Make that two hickeys. Oh wait… I turn my neck further… three hickeys!All those biting and sucking yesterday… I should’ve known that’ll leave a mark. I catch the grin spreading on my face in my reflection and I immediately wipe it off.I shouldn’t feel this good about this. But it’s hard not t
Ryan“… and I knew, man, something was off. I could smell it, literally. She had his junk liquid all over her, and she smelt like him. Hell, even when I kissed her she tasted like him.”I am stuck in a ‘bro’ conversation with a bunch of the groomsmen together with Jackson, listening to some guy that looks a lot like a frat guy relaiyng his breakup story to us. His last sentence has all of us staring at him wide-eyed.Tony is the one that speaks first. breaking the shocked silence. “Tasted like him?”“Yeah bro,” frat guy swings his beer, “it sucked. A lot. Never trust a woman.”“Dude, if you knew what he tasted like then don’t you think that maybe you were the problem in your relationship,” Jackson mocks.Frat guy shakes his head. “Nah bro. He was my bro, and she did him all over.”Tony snickers and taps his shoulder. “So what? You off women now?”“Yeah bro,” frat guy shrugs, “I’m never gonna see a girl and say – dang it she is hot!”Perplexed, I glance at him and see that he has total
Tiara“Brighten up a little,” my mom commands, “there are cameras everywhere and you look like you’re about to have a constipation.”I plaster a thin smile. “This is about as good as it can get, mom,” I tell her, forking through my food at the informal dinner, not really eating anything.The restaurant is great, with a sleek upscale vibe and understated luxury and the food, looks – and smells – great. But all my appetites have disappeared inexplicably.“It’s got to do with the Shelby boy doesn’t it?” she queries, “he’s dreamy, Tiara, he’s rich, he is too good-looking for his own good, but those are not the kind of guys you go for. Now, he is trouble.”I stare at her dryly. “Uh-huh. Thanks for the relationship advice.”“It doesn’t have to be this way,” she pats her blond hair to keep it in place, smiling at the camera as a photographer passes in front of us. I’m scowling before I even register the camera so I’m positive I’ve destroyed her perfect picture. Good.Hoping to steer her atte
Tiara“It wasn’t even like that,” Ciara says in a fit of giggles, “he wanted a burrito, who would’ve thought it would be the beef in his diet?”Everyone erupts into a fit of laughter. We skipped the scheduled cultural tour around the resort and in its stead, opted for a louging in the pool, leaving the sightseeing to the older folks.It’s the old college gang back together and we’ve been caught up in a nostalgia-filled time warp reliving our crazy college memories for the past hour.Melody laughed again, her shoulders jerking. “Y’all know how much Tiara loved her bagels, well there was this one time,” I swat her arm, in an attempt to make her stop, but she ducks and continues anyway “we bought a bagel and some bird snatched it up,” she doubles over in laughter before she says the next words, “y’all should’ve seen her skinny ass chasing a bird all over the garden.”Everybody, - including Ciara - disintegrates into a series of laughter and I fake a glare at each of them. “In my defense
TiaraMy phone pings as Ryan’s message pops on my screen;“Call me. I get worried when you’re silent.”It is followed by a message from Melody;“Alone time with Ciara? What was that about? Text me or I’ll believe she dunked your head into the pool.”I ignore both of them and go back to the task at hand; watching the sunset.My father and I always performed this ritual of ‘capturing the sunset’ during the times he had me over and it has evolved into a therapeutic escape for me over the years, a chance to clear my thoughts and calm my nerves. It’s become an outlet for me.The sky is a breathtaking canvas of soft pinks, burnt oranges and gentle purples my gaze is fixed on its beauty as the suns descent paints a serene landscape. “Not long now,” My father’s voice cuts into my thoughts, I turn to see him give last-minute adaptations to his camera.Ciara knows. Somehow, Ciara knows about the secret I’ve been keeping for two years now and she is willing to use it and every other thing with
TiaraMy sneakers create thumping sounds on the hardwood floor of the hallway as I make my way to Melody’s room. The hotel rooms are situated in a different building from the suites and since most single guests booked rooms, I keep on running into different cousins and relatives that I have to stop and engage in small unnecessary chit-chats with.I just finished chatting with Aunt May, when I feel a shove to my right that projects my whole body to the left, slamming me through an open doorway into a tiny broom closet.Panicked, I whirl around, a scream on my tongue as Ryan closes the door shut behind him, trapping us both inside the broom closet.“Jesus Christ, Ryan!”He looks down at me hard and pins my shoulder to the wall, “Are you blowing me off?”“What are you doing, there are people outside who might hear us?” I whisper, vaguely aware that there are thousands of relatives out there that don’t have to strain to hear us in passing.He gives me a devil-may-care shrug. “I was worrie
RyanMy hand pushes the door to a bedroom open.Empty.Then a bathroom, a guest bedroom, the closet.I hear Melody doing the same all around the house, coming up with the same results as me – nothing.This is the third house we have been to within the span of time I called Grace and now, and we still haven’t found a single thing. Not a single thing to boast of.Grace was panicked when I made the call, frantically begging me to do something, anything, to bring her daughters back. ‘Daughters’ as in plural.I didn’t stop to think about what she meant.The physical manhandling of the cop in New Jersey might get me to jail eventually but for now it seems to be doing more wonders than naught and it didn’t take up to an hour before the sirens filled the air and a search warrant was issued.Tiara James-Lemptons is missing.If the cops are not going to take this serious then they’ll have to deal with the media on their necks 24/7 for the next month. That got their asses moving.I also informed
Tiara“Hello, sister.”My throat tightens as the voice registers in my foggy brain.I blink, trying to block the too bright sun rays away from eyes in that single moment.Ciara moves a bit to her right so that she stands directly in front of the sun streaming through the window, shielding me and revealing her sneering face to me at the same time.I gasp. Somehow, I still held doubt in my head even after I heard her voice. Somehow, I thought I had been hallucinating things. But seeing her confirms that she is really here, and not just some figment of my own imaginations.“Ciara? What the fuck?” I say, even though panic is tearing at my heart.This is wrong.So wrong. Surely, the hit to my head was more than I gave it credit for because now I am seeing things.Because Ciara? Yes she hates my guts but this is just . . . extreme.I try to get up to my feet to meet her gaze because the sun behind her is illuminating her features, blocking it so I know it is her but her face is kind of part
Ryan“How sure are you that this is an assault?” The man in the cop uniform asks Melody. He has a rough beard and a cop moustache that makes him look older than his age and the bored expression on his face is like a slap to my mentality.Melody looks like she is about to shake the shit out of him when she says, “What the fuck do you mean—”“Language, ma’am.” he warns, his eyebrow raised up.“How can you stand there and ask me — how can you – there is blood on the board, dammit!”The man gives her a warning look but doesn’t say anything.She goes on anyway, “The door was left ajar, on a spring night,” she emphasized, “There is blood on the skating board, and the victim is missing. What other evidence could you possibly need?”Immediately we found the door open and we each made rounds to different parts of the house to confirm that Tiara indeed wasn’t there, we decided to call the New Jersey cops to let them know of a possible assault and file a report of a missing person.So far, there
Ryan”Fifty bucks, she fell asleep and forgot to text you,” Jackson comments from the backseat, “I mean she is human after all. We do a lot of things we haven’t done before.”“I’m not taking a bet on the safety of my best friend, Jack,” Melody shoots at him.“Safety? I mean,” Jackson shrugs, “she could literally be asleep right now, and this road trip would all be for nothing. We can just take a swing from here right now to Connecticut. I know a guy with a club that can let us—”Melody shoots daggers at him that shuts him down.He clears his throat. “Have you tried calling her again at least? I mean it’s past dawn now.”True to his words the morning sun is trickling through the open windows into the car, the warm rays, doing nothing to uplift the coldness that has settled in my guts.I’ve forgotten that Jackson asked a question until Melody speaks up again, “She is still not picking up. It’s dawn already, Tee is a morning person. She should have been up by now. And if she isn’t, then
TiaraThe humid smell of mud first hits me.For a second I am led to believe that I am in a very, very dark room. A dark room with no windows and no doors and just the right amount of oxygen.But as my eyes adjust – or in this context – fail to adjust to anything in my line of view, I realize that there is a thick material around my face that covers the entirety of my eyes. It could be sunny out there for all I know.My brain is a mush of uncontrolled thoughts and deafening buzzes and the headache just above my right eye is throbbing in a way that would make the doctors fret. If the doctors saw me now.What the fuck?What happened?The last thing I remember . . .I was in the beach house. Then I went to the beach for a stroll.No, I had gone to take my jacket from the room upstairs. But that is not the last thing I remember.The last thing I remember is me standing right across the threshold in the beach house, pulling the door open because Ryan had rang the doorbell.Wait. . .My hea
Ciara“She is being diagnosed with NPD. It’s not that rare of a case but it is as severe as any other disorder out there, maybe even more.”I remember the conversation like it was yesterday.I was ten years old and I remember being really glad my parents accompanied me to my therapist’s that day. It was one of the trips we went without Tiara and I was super pumped that she had to stay alone with boring old Mrs. Fisher, our live-in sitter at the time.My mother had squinted her eyes at the doctor while my father remained calm like he’ll rather be anywhere else in the world than here, listening to some boring ass therapist.I felt exactly the same way.“What is that?” my mother asked, “What does NPD even mean?”“Well,” my therapist adjusted her glasses like someone about to give a very educated, very important but also very boring lecture. “The word, NPD is an acronym for “Narcissistic Personality Disorder” and it is categorized in most cases by a need for control, and,” she starts tick
Ryan: “Meet me outside your apartment. ASAP”I stare at the message from Melody again as I shrug on a coat. It is weird enough that she wants to talk to me this late in the night or – I check the time on the clock, it is just a little after three am – morning, but what is even weird is that she is already in front of my apartment meaning that whatever she has to say is that urgent.She is standing by her car when I walk out, a slight frown on her face, and she has Jackson standing beside her like some protective bodyguard of some sorts.“That urgent?” I ask her, gesturing between both of them.“He was with me when I decided to come here, wouldn’t let me leave alone,” she replies.I raise an eyebrow at this and he waves off. “Shut the fuck up, bro.”Great. I didn’t know where we stood after the mini threat-like statement he made yesterday but this statement just cleared things up. “You don’t see me saying anything,” I smirk. I like him better when he isn’t oogling over Tiara.I jut my
TiaraThe salty scent of the beach fills my nostrils as I walk, loving the breeze on my face.It is a cold spring night, and I curse for not bringing a coat or jacket to add to my casual dressing of flannel trousers and a sweater before leaving the house and coming down here to stroll along the beach. My gaze travels over the short distance to the house and I groan dramatically.I’ll just have to ride out the cold until I decide to leave.Against all earlier odds, today turned out to be great.Like the-best-thing-that-could-ever-happen kind of great.Not aiming at being smug but I got the man in the end, even though this felt like more like a beginning than an end, , and although I got hurt in the scuffle, well I did come out with the best end of the deal.And what is a victory anyway, without the battle scars?Agreed, I can’t help but feel bad for Ciara. I’ve always felt bad when I thought of our love triangle like somehow I am in the wrong. And I might have been too. He was her man
RyanWhy is Ciara in my apartment?Again?It does not take me long to find out as I push my unlocked apartment door open and find her sitting cross-legged on my couch, a too smiley expression on her face.“What are you doing, Ciara?”She gives me an innocent shrug. “Watching a TV show. Come on, they just started this one I think you’ll love it.”“No, I mean what are you doing here? In my apartment.”“Why, waiting for you,” she says it like it is the most obvious answer, “when I came back from fetching the doctor you were gone, fake alarm by the way, the doctor said she was doing just fine and to be honest I don’t think anything was wrong with her in the first place, my mother has an unnatural flair for the dramatics. But as I was saying, you were not there when I got back so I just figured you’d be here. The apartment was empty,” she rolls her eyes, “where were you, Ryan?”How can she keep a straight, blank face and act like everything is alright?“I’m going to need my keys back, Ciar