Chapter Twenty-six: Archer

Chapter Twenty-Six

Archer

I lean back in the uncomfortable airport seat, watching our bags while Quinn goes to the bathroom. We’re headed back to reality, and something seems different between us. As much as I want to deny it, I know what it is. After taking care of that drunk girl last night, Quinn told me I need to take the fellowship. She said she can see that trauma and life-or-death situations are what I’m made for, and I can’t disagree.

But I should. Because as much as I want to take the fellowship, it feels wrong telling her I’ll reply with my acceptance as soon as we get back. Yeah…I want to be a trauma surgeon, but it’s not like settling for general surgery is the shitty consolation prize. She’s so encouraging and optimistic, hinting even that she’d move to Boston so we can be together. I want nothing more than to be with Quinn, but I know she’ll hate it up east with me.

I’d be at work more than I’d be at home. She’d be alone most of the time with a newborn. She wouldn’t have any friends to hang out with. Family wouldn’t be nearby to help with Emma or give her a much-needed break.

She’s resent me in the end, and nothing is worth that.

If I do go through with accepting the fellowship, the best thing to do would be for her to stay in Chicago and for me to go, and for us to try and maintain a long-distance relationship until I’m done.

It’s a good thing I didn’t propose, right?

I let out a sigh and turn my head down, not knowing what the fuck I’m doing. Neither is a bad option: take the fellowship or find a job in Chicago so I can be with Quinn and my daughter. But one is so much better than the other.

“Tired?” Quinn’s voice comes from behind me, startling me a bit.

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Me too. It’s kind of funny how all that beach relaxing wasn’t as restful as I thought it’d be.”

I turn my head up and smile. “Being out in the heat wears you down. And we spent a lot of our sleep time having sex.”

“I believe that was mostly your doing.”

“You’re just as much to blame here, missy.”

Quinn laughs and my heart aches at the thought of not being able to hear that in person. And—fuck—I’ll be hours away around the time she has to give birth. If I’m in the middle of a long shift, I can’t just leave and hop on the first plane I can to the Midwest.

She rests her head on my shoulder. “We have the plane ride to sleep. Well, you can sleep at least. I’ll probably be awake the whole time, which is okay. I’ve loaded up my Kindle and I’m ready to dive into this paranormal series I’ve been wanting to read for years.”

“Years?”

“I wait until at least three books are out in a series to start reading. Cliffhangers give me literal anxiety.”

I laugh and slip my arm around her, glancing up at the clock. Our plane is on time today, and we’ll be boarding soon.

“Have you heard anything from your parents about Bobby?” she asks.

“Nope. No news is usually good news. I’ll be generous and give him a few weeks before he fucks up again.”

Quinn frowns. “You don’t think he’ll recover?”

“He doesn’t want to recover.”

“Oh, right. I guess you can’t force it on him.”

I shake my head. My parents have tried many times and it hasn’t worked. Life isn’t like a book or a movie. Not everyone gets a happily ever after or even an epic exit scene. Some people coexist with the rest of the world, functioning on a level of minimum survival, living for themselves and not caring what the fuck they do to other people.

That’s Bobby.

“Do you have to write a formal letter or anything to let the fellowship people know you’ve accepted?” Quinn asks as she picks off her nail polish.

“No. I basically need to reply and say I’ll be there.”

“You should do it then,” she encourages. “You’re going to be great, you know.”

I smile, but it feels forced. “Yeah. I know I’ll enjoy it.” I enjoy general surgery too. And I enjoy being with her even more.

“The two years will be rough.” She takes my hand. “But we’ll make it work.”

Before I can say anything, we’re called to line up to board. Quinn gathers her stuff and I grab her carry-on as well as my own. We’re walking up when her phone rings, and she digs it out of her purse and answers. It’s loud at the moment, and she steps away to hear better. She comes back right in time to hand the attendant her ticket.

“Was that your mom?” I ask, hiking my bag up on my shoulder.

“No, Jacob.”

“Your ex?”

She nods. “Yeah. He’s working with a few others to start up a new company and asked if I was interested. I am.”

We walk down the terminal. “What would you be doing?”

“It’s kinda complicated. To make a long story short, we’d be developing new software and using technology to help the environment.”

“Sounds neat.”

“Yes! There will be a lot of environmental research too,” she says, looking excited. I swallow hard. I don’t want to make her give that up. “And the best part is after the initial start-up phase, I’ll be able to do a lot of the coding and development from an office at home.”

“You could work from home?”

“Yeah. It would take a while before we got to that point though. We’ll all be sharing an office in the Lincoln Park area for a while.”

We get on the plane and find our seats. Quinn takes the spot by the window this time since I had it on the way to Hawaii. “So you’d be working with Jacob?”

“Yes. We’ll be equal partners to the project.”

I nod again. “Why did he ask you?”

She raises her eyebrows and I realize my question wasn’t worded the best. “I’m good at what I do. Plus selling that app gives me street cred in the technology world and we’re more likely to get big investors if they see my name. I’ve already proven that I’m able to turn a profit.” She continues to explain how things would work, and how they’re hoping to expand the company over the years and have it make an impact on the world. I always knew she was smart, but I didn’t realize she was so business savvy as well. I can easily see her as a big CEO of an energy solutions company, creating new programs to save energy and bring clean water to underdeveloped parts of the world.

I can’t take that away from her and have her move to Boston.

“So no, he’s not trying to hit on me or anything,” she concludes, going back to my question. “I made sure of it.”

“You did?”

“Yeah. I basically asked him and made sure he knew we were together.”

“That’s good, though you have to admit it’s a little weird to work with your ex.”

She shakes her head in disagreement. “I don’t think it’s weird at all. If you worked with that one nurse you dated, I wouldn’t think it’s weird.”

“But we’re surrounded by other people. It’s not like the two of us are performing surgery in my living room.”

“Performing surgery in your living room isn’t weird but working with an ex is?” She buckles her seat belt.

“You know what I mean.”

“No, I don’t. Because you’re sounding really jealous and like you don’t trust me, which hurts.”

“I trust you, but I don’t trust him.”

“So you’re saying he doesn’t think I’m good for the job and is secretly trying to steal me back even though I’m pregnant with your child?”

“No.”

“Then what are you saying?” She lifts her eyebrows and waits.

I shake my head and let out a breath. “I don’t know. He’s your ex and you admitted that he still likes you. I’m sure he’ll hit on you.”

“That shouldn’t matter, Archer. I get hit on from time to time and it might be hard to believe, but I don’t fall for just any guy who tells me I have a nice ass,” she says, looking pissed. Her eyes fall shut and the anger fades away into something worse. She’s hurt by my words and I hate it. “I love you and I thought we had a good relationship. But if you can’t even trust me…” She turns, tears filling her eyes.

Her reaction is justified, and not without merit. I am jealous—just a bit. And I do trust her to be loyal, but yeah, I’m a little afraid she’ll not want to do the long-distance thing while raising a child. I’ve wanted us to be together for so long the fear of it all crumbling apart around me is nagging.

“Babe,” I start and take her hand. “I’m sorry.”

She wipes her eyes and smiles. “Thanks.” She gives my hand a squeeze and then lets go, getting her phone from her bag. “Want to look at vacation pictures with me?”

I lean closer. “Yeah. I do.”