When I was done I lifted her out of the tub and walked her through into my room.I remembered something that I'd thought of while I was watching her in that hospital bed, being thankful that I had the chance to see her again when I'd begun to think she might be gone from me forever."I'm taping our lovemaking sessions from now on." She looked at me curiously."Why?""Because when you were gone, I thought I would go mad for the sight of you. I'm never going to be without the sight or the sound or the taste of you ever again.""Jace...""No Sian, you don't understand, the fear, the fucking not knowing, never again." I thought I'd got this all out of my system but apparently not.I set up the camera as she watched before going back to the bed and her. "I love you, you have nothing to fear from this. I won't tape us each time we're together like this, but I need this."She nodded her assent and I nibbled on her ears and neck as I sought to distract her.It didn't take long to have
How could everything be going so wrong? I stormed around my room destroying everything in my path as I felt the first stirrings of fear.After my conversation with Jace I wasn't sure if he suspected or not, but how could I chance it?He'd sounded pretty amiable there at the end, so maybe I've bought myself some time, but how long? No, it wasn't in me to sit and wait for a noose to be tied around my neck.I knew I shouldn't have trusted that idiot with this. Grabbing my phone I called him. "Meet me down at the pier, fifteen minutes."I didn't wait for an answer just left the house and headed out in my car. I didn't want him coming here just in case someone was watching the house."And just who the hell would be watching the house Mandy? Don't go getting paranoid already, that's the surest way to fuck things up even more than they already were."If that idiot Kelly hadn't called me when she did I would never have known. I wonder how much the Saunders had paid to keep it so hush-hus
I hurried back to my car biting my perfectly manicured nails and fighting the urge to pee.I raced back to the house and slammed through the door at a run. Should I start packing? The thought broke me out in a cold sweat.I went to my secret stash and counted. Not enough; shit. I had a few fishes on the line, but only one was at the point or close to the point where I could reel him in.What if I miscalculated? I stood to lose a lot of dough if I moved too soon. But if I stayed and that idiot talked, then I would be spending a very long time behind bars. Orange is not my new anything but fucking orange and it does not go with my complexion.I made the call after doing my breathing exercise. This wasn't how I usually did things. Usually I had a more sophisticated scheme in place. But time was of the essence and I hadn't a minute to waste.I caught sight of myself in the mirror as I waited for the other line to pick up, and gave myself the luxury of taking a longer look.Damn it wa
Oh hell, what is she doing here? I'm not sure if I should hang around to find out, or get the hell out of here. My gut burned with the implications, but one wrong move now could prove disastrous if I were wrong.How had my life come to this? How had I fucked things up so royally? My feet felt leaden as I moved through the quiet stillness of the night. I heard a rustling sound coming from my left somewhere and hurried my steps.Hindsight is a son of a bitch; too little too late. I thought I could control the situation though, I mean she was just a kid after all. I'm a grown man, a man who suffered a great loss and went through a rough patch true, but I've always been sensible.I've never given in to the wiles of Hollywood, not until now anyway. The debauchery that was kept well hidden: the bed hopping and orgies that would make Caligula's look like a garden-variety tea party. I'd kept myself well above it all. But then something happened, something that I had no control over. I ne
"What the fuck was that?""That was a gunshot.""What the fuck?" I turned around to see my dad behind me."We need to get out of here son, because whatever that was can't be good.""What're you doing here?""I followed you of course. You didn't really think you were fooling me all those times you snuck out of the house did you? What kind of dad would I be if that were true?"He smirked as he herded me out of the shadows. "You have eyes on me still?""What do you think?""Dad…""Before you say anything, it's nothing intrusive son. I know you're a grown up now, so I do things accordingly. But I have to keep you safe, not only for your sake or mine, but for your mother's as well. Have you any idea what it would do to her if something was to happen to you?"I wasn't sure how I felt about that, but knowing him there was no point in arguing, so I shelved it for now. There were always ways around everything.We walked back to where he'd parked behind my car in the bushes. I looked
"I can't believe you lost yours without me." Belle pouted at me and looked affronted."Uh, I didn't know we were doing that." Leave it to her to get my mind off of what troubles me."You know what I mean, I thought we would do it like at the same time, but it looks like you're way ahead of me." She was fighting to hide her stupid grin like she's been doing for the past hour or so.I'd told her about my little escapade with Shane the day before because hey, she's my best friend and we're supposed to share. And also because, after the fact, I'm just a tad bit scared about what's going to happen to the rest of my life.A little melodramatic no doubt, but that's how my mind works. I think I consumed self-doubt in my mother's milk. After we'd done the deed and gone to the hospital to see Sian, he'd taken me home, or followed me home was more accurate.It had only taken that long for the glow to fade and worry to set in. It felt as though I'd achieved the ultimate goal and now there w
"So how's Sian doing? I tried calling her last night but she's not answering." This boy makes me jittery; I don't like being jittery, jittery is for pansy ass cheerleaders with shit for brains. Ever since he's been here I've been off my game and I'm thinking it's about time to take the power back. I just needed to figure some stuff out first.He makes me nervous the way he looks at me. He's the first guy who's ever really looked at me and saw me, but more than that, he acts as if he likes what he sees."She's good, she's with Jace, he's got her on lockdown; mom and dad were joking this morning that they can barely get by him. She should be back by Monday though so you girls can get back to whatever it is that you do."Does he have to look at me like that, like I'm under a microscope? Like he can read my every thought?"Why so antsy Red, do I make you nervous?" Of course he touched me then and I lost what little brains I had left. It was only his hand on my cheek, but it felt like
"Mom is that you, where did you go?" I snuck my head out my door as I heard her going by."I should be asking you that young lady, your dad and I were worried sick about you."I'm sure he was. I turned away so that she wouldn't see the look of bitter distaste that crossed my face at the mention of him.He'd made such a mess that I wasn't sure if I'd ever be able to forgive him. After tonight though, things should go back to normal. I hope that after this my dad would've learned his lesson.I'll just keep my eyes on him from now on and make sure he didn't do this again. "I'm going to bed now mom." I turned into my room to escape."Wait, you didn't tell me where you went.""Oh, nowhere in particular, I just took a little ride over to Sian's to see how she's doing."I kept my face turned away still so she couldn't read my expression just in case she was feeling focused today."Oh how is she dear, better I hope?""Yes mom thanks, she's doing much better.""You know I suddenly fee