The blurry line between hatred and resentment

Jessie's POV

I kept my eyes glued to the sleek black car in front of us. Gavin Pierre had done enough and I was ready to confront him now.

Five years was enough time to move on, but he had blurred the line between hatred and resentment. I couldn’t tell if he still hated me for the past or if he was having a good time making my life miserable because he could.

I blame Joy Evans for this. She caused what happened between Gavin and I five years ago.

It was her 20th birthday, and Joy wouldn’t stop talking about going to the club now that we were of age, but I wasn’t up to it. Not just because loud partying and fluorescent lights were not my scene but because I had too much to think about. I was still struggling to heal from my own injuries.

“This will be good for you, Jess. Who knows you might even find a man to make you happy.”

“Joy, I don’t need a man to make me happy. My family is in so much debt…”

“Shhh… enough of that now, Jess. We never talk about anything but your family’s debt. Every family has their own problems, even mine, but I can’t let that ruin my birthday. You’re my best friend, will you make me sad on my birthday?”

“I’m sorry, Joy. You’re right, it’s your birthday today. I can let go of my problems for just one night.”

“Yay!” Joy squealed. Dressed in black sequin gowns, our natural blond hair stood out, cascading down our bare backs in the halter neck dresses we had on.

“You look gorgeous, Jess. You should dress up like this more often.”

“Joy, I’m uncomfortable in this dress.”

And by uncomfortable, I meant that the dress was too tight on me. It showed my boobs a little too much, and the length of it was nothing to write about, but Joy insisted.

The instant we stepped into the club, all eyes paused and stared at us for a moment.

That was when our eyes met for the first time. That was when I met Gavin Pierre. He looked like a model carved out of a magazine, his steely gray eyes rummaged my body in a split second sending shivers down my spine.

I immediately felt even more naked than before and instantly excused myself to the bathroom.

“I can’t do this,” I muttered, looking at myself in the mirror.

“You’re not serious, right?” Joy’s voice caught me off guard.

“You promised, Jessie. Why’re you doing this now? Look, I already got us a bottle of vodka, and this sh*t is expensive.”

“Alright, alright Joy. Let’s do it.”

Before I knew what was happening, Joy ordered a second bottle of Vodka. The night ran wild and we lost control. It was the first time in a very long time that I felt completely free. I was no longer saddled by thoughts of drowning in debts or my father abandoning us.

Completely intoxicated by alcohol, three men walked over to our table and began talking with Joy.

The mood of the night drastically changed from two girls having fun to two girls being preyed on.

I knew we had to leave before anything regrettable happened.

“Let's go home, Joy, it's not fun anymore ..”

“Go home if you want to,” Joy replied, “The fun just started, why are you so naive?”

I didn't need anyone to tell me that Joy was enjoying the attention, I stood from the table and staggered my way through the club.

Even though I was drunk, I knew my way out, I also knew someone was following me.

Fear gripped me at once and I doubled my pace. As soon as I stepped out of the club, I found a taxi at the exit and hopped into the backseat without thinking twice.

“Phew!” I breathed in relief.

Everything turned to a blur and my eyes gave out.

The car came to a sudden stop, stirring me awake. I realized that I had made a mistake, this wasn’t a taxi. It was in fact a limited edition of a Maserati car.

“What was I thinking?” I cautioned myself.

Embarrased, I sneaked out of the car hoping to escape, but I was stopped by a firm grip on my arm.

“You’re drunk,” he said coldly, yet his voice was kind.

Without waiting for my reply, he took me to his hotel room.

My heart sank with confusion when I saw him take off his shirt.

“What… what are you doing?” I stammered.

Gavin smirked, approaching me with slow, resolute steps.

“I saw you checking me out at the club, now you can have me…” he said huskily.

“What?” I breathed, “I… I wasn’t checking you out. If anything you were the one checking me out.”

“You must have liked that considering your choice of dress..”

Before I could say anything in my defense, Gavin held my hands over my head, and slammed his lips over mine.

Intoxicated by vodka, I melted into his arms and begged him to take me to bed.

The next morning, I woke up in a strange room with no memory of how I ended up in his bed, the last thing I remembered was being followed as I left the club- that was the beginning of our misunderstanding.

I woke up alone but the clothes scattered across the floor told me I had lost my innocence to a complete stranger. What if I was raped?!

Just then, a phone blared in the room and I snatched it without thoughts.

Me: Hello, my name is Jessie Gray. Please help me!

Candace: “Who the hell is this?!”

Gavin walked in, and snatched the phone from my hand.

“What gave you the audacity to answer my phone? Do you know what you have done?”

My mouth quivered with words but nothing came out.

“Who are you?” I managed to say.

Gavin's eyes turned cold with fury. “Get out!” He bellowed, “Leave and never show your face here again, you cheap slut!”

“Cheap slut? You deflowered me! You took advantage of me!” I yelled back.

Unexpectedly, his fiancee, Candace, an influential businesswoman in town barged into the room.

Despite his plea, Candace announced their break-up on national TV on grounds of cheating a few days to their wedding, and Gavin Pierre lost his reputation due to the scandal.

Gavin Pierre hated me from that day on. I stayed away from him just as he wanted for five years but it seemed he wouldn’t stay away from me.

The pressure from the hospital couldn’t have come from anyone else but him.

The taxi came to a halt and I hopped off in front of Gavin’s mansion, determined to end the reef that had lasted for five years, but as soon as I entered the compound, I lost all confidence.

“What are you doing here?” Gavin’s voice startled me. “Didn’t I say you shouldn’t show yourself in front of me ever again?”

“But you keep popping up in my life,” I answered brazenly. “Shouldn’t you also keep to your end?”

“You must have a lot of nerve coming in here” Gavin fumed, “Are you aware of what you did to me? I want you to suffer as much as I did!”

“Haven’t I suffered enough? What did I really do to you?”

“You ruined my reputation!” Gavin bellowed, “You cost me my relationship. The woman I was in love with left me for someone else because of your lie!”

“I didn’t know it at the time, Gavin, please. I’m sorry,”

“I wanted to say this to you ever since I discovered the truth but you didn't give me the chance. I'm sorry, please, Gavin, please”

“You had five years to apologize to me but you didn’t. Do you think this can change what you did?!”

“I know this doesn’t change anything, but please Gavin help me. My mother’s life is at stake… I'm really sorry that your relationship ended because of me”

“Quiet, you goddamn liar!” Gavin roared.

My stomach dipped as he gripped my shoulders. I shook beneath him, afraid he would slam me against the wall.

“You have some nerve coming here and asking for forgiveness after what you did.”

Gavin snarled, his eyes blazing with fury.

He reached into the pocket and brought out a handkerchief, wiping his hands carefully.

“I shouldn't have touched you, you’re dirty and disgusting. Perhaps your mother’s illness is as a result of the life you’ve lived.”

Tears stung my eyes, but I refused to let them fall.

“I know you hate me, Gavin. But please don’t take it out on my mother. She doesn't deserve it, please…”

“You're right, your mother didn't do anything to me.” Gavin said, surprising me by the change of tone.

“My revenge should be on you alone.”

My eyes widened in disbelief. “Will you help my mother?”

“On a condition” he shrugged.

“I'll do anything,” I replied quickly.

“Let's sign a contract, that you’ll belong to me and I will do whatever I want to you.”