004: Distress

CARTER

"I have done what you asked," I said.

Grandma Martha raised a brow. She took a bite of toast before she asked, "And what is that?"

"Getting a wife, of course. I have finally found the woman I intend to settle down with. I'm getting married to her in four days."

She choked on her cup of coffee, spluttered and had a protracted coughing fit.

"Easy now," I murmured.

The maid who had just served her tea immediately darted forward. She poured my grandmother a glass of water, dropped it in front of her and hovered uncertainty, her hands fluttering helplessly over Grandma Martha, who eventually twisted her fingers impatiently in her direction and shooed her away.

"You- what did you just say?" she said in a voice made hoarse by the coughing.

I glanced at the glass of water at her elbow. "Maybe you should take that first before-"

"I'm fine. I'm fine. Did you just say you're getting married?"

"Yes."

"In four days?"

"Yes."

We sat in silence for a second, two, three. The corners of her mouth twisted, and a slow grin spread across her face, outlining the crow's feet around her pale blue eyes.

"You're joking," she said.

"I assure you that I'm not."

But she didn't hear me. She let out peal after peal of laughter.

"Oh, come on, Carter," she said when she was finally able to speak again. "You got a wife already? When did I talk to you about getting married? Wasn't it just two days ago? And you got a wife in that short space of time?

She chuckled and took a sip of her coffee. "You were always the funny one when you wanted to be, of course. A wife in two days, a wedding in four! That's a good one. But just ensure you get a wife before a month, though. I've not changed my mind on that score."

Shaking her head and muttering to herself at intervals, she resumed eating her breakfast.

"Grandma," I said.

"Mmm?" she murmured around a mouth full of food.

"Please, look at me." She swallowed and obliged with the air of one who was about to hear another joke. "I wasn't joking. I've never been more serious in my life. I have found the woman I want to marry, and she's said yes."

Her brow wrinkled. There was no amusement in her expression now, but she still did not believe me. "You can't be serious, Carter. I gave you a month to do all that. I wanted you to get married, but even I cannot ignore the fact that something like that can't be accomplished in what... six days-"

"But I did it," I insisted. "Shouldn't you be happy? Isn't that what you wanted?"

With one bejewelled hand, she waved my statement away as though it was some annoying fly.

"Should I begin to list the difficulties I can see in such a claim?" She began to tick them off her fingers. "Firstly, you'll have to know the woman. Secondly, you'd have to hint at marriage and then propose. Thirdly-"

"I could bring her here for dinner this evening so you can all get to know her. Will that clear all your doubts?"

"Who's the woman coming for dinner, and what doubts are you talking about?" Ollie's voice came from the doorway. He walked into the room with a kind of swagger. The sight of him made me grit my teeth. I was willing to bet that he already saw himself as the company's CEO.

"Ollie," I said quietly and nodded.

He nodded. "Carter."

"I didn't know you were in the habit of listening at keyholes these days to the conversation of others," I said in tones of honeyed politeness.

I gave him a flat smile. He flushed angrily but quickly recovered his good humour. He even smiled back. Goodness! The creep was so sure he had this one in the bag.

"Carter just told me that he had gotten a woman he wants to get married to in... four days," Grandma Martha told him as he seated himself. "He's even bringing her over for dinner tonight."

Ollie's eyes grew round with exaggerated surprise. "Whoa! What did you do to get her to agree to end up with you?" He chuckled and punched me on the shoulder in what was supposed to be a playful manner, but he deliberately packed a lot of power into the punch. I didn't give him the satisfaction of seeing me wince. "Well, I'll believe you've gotten yourself a fiance when I see it... Oh, sorry, her." Grandma Martha nodded in agreement. "Anyway... did grandma tell you I've gotten officially divorced? I've gotten someone much, much better, someone more worthy of our family name."

"Good for you," I said, keeping my expression deadpan.

On the inside, I was squirming in excitement in anticipation of seeing the look on his face when I brought Iris to dinner that evening. I almost couldn't wait.

*******************

“I’m nervous,” Iris whispered to me as we exited the car.

“You don’t have to be. I’ll be there the entire time.” I reassured her.

Iris's hand tightened in mine as we walked towards the dinner room where the family was seated. Snatches of their conversation drifted out to us. I gave Iris a reassuring look. She took a deep breath and we stepped forward, making ourselves visible. Conversation ceased abruptly at our entrance. Every eye was fixed on Iris and I. Every eye except those of Ollie and Charlotte. With a lovesick expression on his face that was revolting to watch, he was feeding Charlotte a cluster of grapes. She kept simpering and batted her overlong lashes at him after every mouthful. Finally, they registered the silence in the room.

"What-" Ollie began.

Then he saw me holding hands with Iris. The look on his face was priceless, better than what I had imagined this afternoon. On Ollie's right, Grandma Martha was desperately trying to regain her composure. On his left, Charlotte gasped. Her eyes were fixed on Iris. The cup she was holding slipped from her hand, fell to floor and shattered with a sound as loud as that of a small bomb.