05 A New Life

(Winona)

Moving to the city I grew up in was a real struggle at first. It’s been three years and slowly each day got better. The tiny life growing inside me made me stronger. This wasn’t just about me.

After giving birth to my beautiful girl, I started a little firm as a marketing and financial advisor, putting my education to use. It seemed being able to put forward proposals for successful marketing campaigns is something I’m very excellent at.

All of my smaller company campaigns have been going like wildfire. Enough to get the attention of several larger firms. Bigger contracts really turn things around in the corporate world.

I guess time does heal all wounds. It’s been the best time of my life since the divorce. Mostly because I’m a mother now and she is the most important thing in the world to me.

Would I love being a complete family? Sure. But families come in all shapes and sizes and mine is my daughter and my foster mother who stepped in without hesitation and welcomed me and now my baby girl into her life and small home.

Keeping my daughter safe and in a stable home environment is worth the sacrifice of leaving her father behind.

I kiss Abby on the forehead. “Momma’s got to go sweety.”

She bangs her spoon on her highchair and grins. I stare at her, mesmerized by her cuteness again. Her eyes, exactly like her father’s, beam up at me with her little cherub cheeks I constantly want to squeeze. She is just the happiest baby ever.

I check my watch. “I must go. I’ll be late and I promised Phillip I wouldn’t be today,” I called out to my foster mother, Anne.

“Just go, Abby and I are fine. I’ll do dinner. Why don’t you ask Phillip to join us, you’ve both been working such long hours.”

I hesitate. I think Anne is trying to make Phillip and I more than business partners. I get it, he’s an attractive guy, young, energetic and a very hard worker. “I will ask him but, Anne, you know we are only friends and I want to keep it that way.”

“I know Jayden is the father of Abby and that’s all been messy, but you need to have happiness. You need love, we all do.”

“I am happy. Right here with you and her. I’ve built a strong business in digital marketing and the bank accounts are finally showing profit. If we can nail a couple more major contracts, I’ll secure enough money for a great college fund.”

“College is a long way off. Focus on your own happiness too.”

“I can’t right now.” I may not be in love with Jayden the way I once was but it’s hard with his eyes being the best part of my day. Abby looks so much like him, and he doesn’t even know she exists. Some days I really wonder if I’ve done the right thing keeping my pregnancy a secret.

I go over and give her a hug. “I’m okay, I promise. We’re okay.”

Even the old threats from Judy Brennan and Ashlyn seemed to bother me less these days. No one is getting between me and my child, that much I do know. I’m stronger now. But I think Jayden would love his daughter so much and I’m denying him that chance.

“Winona, you did the right thing and one day, when you’re ready, you can tell him. There’s nothing wrong with that but denying yourself sharing a life with a man who will appreciate and cherish you isn’t right.”

“I can’t bring another person into her life like that. I want a stable home for her, we give her that. If I get in a relationship and we break up later, that will just be too confusing for her.”

Also, I can’t bear the thought of going through that pain again. In fact, I have no intentions of leaving myself vulnerable. I’m never going to let any man hurt me that way again. My life is my business and my daughter. Building something for us both. Getting us all into a bigger home and the best medical insurance.

That’s what I care the most about. Then I might be ready to talk to Jayden about Abby. I’ve done well so far, but I doubt I can keep her a secret forever. Besides, she deserves to know who her father is later. For now, it’s just the way it has to be. If we can get this latest contract signed off, I will be the owner of a million-dollar business. 

That is my priority.

My business partner, Phillip, has been helping me grow the company almost the whole three years and we have grown very close. I have to admit, I do find myself flirting a little despite my decision to not bring a serious relationship into Abby’s life.

But she has met Phillip and does like him and he’s patient with her. I guess Anne may be right. Perhaps I will agree to go out with him, as more than business partners, when I am over the pain and hurt Jayden caused me.

But I need to go to work. Phillip said we have another offer on the table and the company is sending someone in person to make sure we sign off with them and not another company. It’s a major world brand and I know it’s a billion-dollar subsidiary of Brennan Industries.

But there’s no way Jayden or anyone close to him would turn up for a meeting with such a small company like mine. That is way beneath their level. So, for Phillip’s sake, I’ve agreed to at least hear them out. He was so pumped and this will be his baby. I don’t have to be involved other than the signature.

***

“My palms are sweating,” Phillip says.

“Don’t worry. You got this.” I reassure him.

“This deal can change our lives.”

“I know and you’ve put the work in, so just trust in yourself.” I haven’t told him about it being a company of my ex. I don’t want him to think he won or lost the contract because of my past.

He takes a deep breath in and puffs it out, psyching himself up. “I know. I got this, we got this.”

I high-five him. “Your work is amazing. We’re a great team but this is your deal.”

He looks all serious for a second and takes my hand in his. “Winona, I can’t thank you enough for taking me in as a partner, giving me a chance.”

“Don’t talk stupid. You are the best. I know a solid business prospect when I see one. Your hard work got you here.”

“I can’t believe I’m so close to the start of my dreams. But without you, I wouldn’t have this opportunity. No one else has the edge everyone wants in their advertising and that’s what attracts major players.”

“We make a wonderful team. You bring just as much to the table, Phillip. Speaking of tables, Anne is cooking a celebration dinner for us tonight. Would you want to join us?”

His eyes lit up and he pulled me in close to him. He smells amazing and his fit body envelops mine. I mean, any woman would give anything to be with a man like Phillip.

“Winona, you know how I feel about you. I’d love to come to dinner.”

“I didn’t mean it like that. I just want to stay friends and business partners.”

“But you’re attracted to me as well, I can feel it. What’s holding you back? You know I think the world of Abby.”

I sigh. He’s right. I am attracted to him. I was just too scared of being hurt again to go there. “We have to keep it professional. Let’s get this deal signed, then maybe we can talk.”

“I want you in my future, Winona, you and Abby. Just know that. You are beautiful and smart. Everything I could ever want in a life partner.”

Then before I can stop him his lips are on mine. His kiss is gentle and the softness of his lips makes me hesitate before pushing him away. Not in a harsh way, but just to break up this intimacy building between us. “It’s the wrong timing, Phillip. They’ll be here any second to discuss the deal.”

“I apologize. I’m just so damn pumped about it and I’ve wanted to kiss you forever.”

“Don’t be sorry. It’s just...”

I look away while finding the right word to turn him down, only to find standing at our glass door, glaring in at me and Phillip, is Jayden Brennan himself.