LOGINShare
Chapter 113
Last Updated:
2024-10-29 19:42:56"No!" She replied with a gasp.
"You don't need to pretend. The truth is written all over your face."
Suddenly turned mute, she stared into his eyes for a long while, her face crumpled with emotion. "Will you... Will you let me go with him if it's what I truly want?" She finally spoke.
He had expected it, but still it terribly hurt to hear the words from her.
"I don't know." He replied honestly, wavering as his possessive compulsion warred with his conscience. "I didn't think I could ever let you go. I thought it's the only thing I couldn't stand, not having you by my side, but turned out I was wrong. That's when I realized, I don't want anything to hurt you, not even my love for you."
"Don't-" She broke in suddenly, a choke suspended her sentence. "Don't say anything else. I don't want to hear that. I thought-" She paused to collect her breath. "I thought I finally found a man who will do anyt
Related chapters
Disgraceful Chapter 114
"No."She said, gripping his sides, her fingernails dug into his muscles."I don't want you to stop."She pressed her parted lips into his neck, his skin was hot and flushed, and she licked a pulsing vein in his throat, stealing the last drop of self control he possessed.He made it quick, leaving no time for fear and anticipation. Between one breath and the next, he made his way through pleats of flesh and tore through the tight ring of resistance. A cry tore from her throat and he held still. A faint, distant voice in his head told him to withdraw, but he couldn't leave. For a few, blissful seconds he could feel nothing but sheer satisfaction."My God..."He heard his own voice, harsh and feral, and he bit back the rest of his words. She was innocent and delicate, and he didn't want to terrify her with his talk. He stilled for control, wanting to mak
Disgraceful Chapter 115
Except for the chilly weather of the late autumn, their journey to London was relatively smooth and pleasant. They rode on leisure pace, stopping by almost every new town they passed now and then for shopping and sightseeing.One wintry day, they decided to put up in the nearest inn before the late afternoon because the weather had become too harsh to continue with the trip. When the carriage pulled off the front steps of the decent inn, they hurried inside, escaping from the incessant biting wind.They got a warm welcome from the innkeeper and after several minutes of waiting, a staff came to show them the way to their room in the second floor. Ashton let Ava and Polly preceded him along the narrow corridor.While they stood in front of the room, waiting for the staff opening the door for them, he surreptitiously ran a hand down her spine and muttered in her ear."All through the way I've been longing for you."
Disgraceful Chapter 116
After his mother's death, as an adolescent he was carrying around a feeling of emptiness. He sought solace and fulfillment in his passion for art. Immersing himself in his painting was the only thing he could do to fill the emptiness and forget his pain, until that day.One fine morning, he was painting in his favorite place in the estate, a secluded garden behind a long, vine-covered wall. In the privacy of the garden every midmorning was the time he could savor a few peaceful hours of solitude. Suddenly a creaking sound from the old oak door claimed his attention, and he glanced up to see a red-haired woman standing at the doorway.In an instant the sheer magnetism of her unusual beauty caught him completely off guard. He came to a standstill, like when he caught a glimpse of a majestic nature and felt its beauty take his breath away.The woman wasn't classically beautif
Disgraceful Chapter 117
He'd wished that memories of her would fade into blurred, scattered fragments as the past receded, but it wouldn't let him send it away.Underneath the darkened sky, he wandered aimlessly, roaming the quaint streets of the little town. Before long, his fingers had gone numb from the cold air, if only his heart could be deprived of feeling too.It was long past dinnertime when he returned to the hotel several hours later. A muffled sound of music and laughters came from the taproom, claiming his attention there. He stopped and glanced at the warm, inviting light from the taproom door. It seemed like he could use some whiskey.*****Ashton retired to his room near midnight, sober and still restless. He took several shots to help soothing his nerves, and left when he was still in a lucid state of mind. No matter how bad things got, he never drank himself
Disgraceful Chapter 118
The sudden spontaneous kiss stopped him dead in his tracks. He fell into a daze, unable to think or react for a while. Clinging onto him, somehow she lost her balance and lurched back a few steps, bringing him with her. She laughed against his lips when her back hit the wall, and he braced his hand against the wall on either side of her shoulder. The sweet, silvery sound snapped him back to his mindfulness.He tore his mouth from her, starting back several steps. He was shaken by his own visceral response to her, which he found difficult to control or resist. Immediately he wiped his lips with his fingers as if to rub the taste of her off his lips.Her eyes dimmed at the gesture and a shadow crossed her face."It appears that my husband is not the only one who found me stale.""You know that it's not true."He said quickly."Things are not quite the same now, Amanda. I will be getting married soon."
Disgraceful Chapter 119
Actually she had known who Amanda was, but she wanted to know what she was to him. She wanted to know what he would call her."Mrs. Chapman? I've known her long time ago. My estate bought dairies from her father's farm and she came to deliver them every morning.""So I see."She turned to get a clean towel set on the side table. Giving him a sharp look, she handed it to him. He took the towel and began to rub his hair. Painfully aware of her icy stare, he averted his eyes and moved away, pretending to search for his comb on the dresser."You don't usually converse with the likes of her."He just found the comb when she said that, and his hand immediately stilled at her remarks."What exactly do you mean by the likes of her?"He retorted, surprised to find himself quite vexed by the way she mentioned Amanda. She winced at his tone, but deliberately ignored it."We bot
Disgraceful Chapter 120
"It's one thing I can't tell you. Some things are best kept secret."The words haunted him throughout the rest of the day. He never had any suspicion about it before, but now when the idea occured to him, her sudden disappearance seemed to make a whole lot sense.He'd heard rumors. The servants murmured about it for weeks. Her family said she went to France. It was rather curious. He wondered how her father could afford it, both financially and mentally. The old man was well-known all over the country for his frugal existence.He should have suspected about it earlier, the real reason behind her leaving. It never occurred to him before, because it seemed like her to come and go as she pleased. She was notoriously wanton, though he constantly disregarded that undesirable fact. There had never been a promise of fidelity between them, and when they were having an affair, he knew she was engaged in the same sort of relations
Disgraceful Chapter 121
Her back instantly tensed at that, and he tried to see her expression in the frosted glass but he could only get an obscure view of her reflection. He wondered if he was only imagining it, but somehow he could hear her sharp intake of breath. His heart was beating painfully hard as he waited to hear a word pass her lips, but it was the long silence that voiced what he was afraid to hear."Good Lord." He hissed with a shaken voice as a cold, sickening feeling roiled his stomach. "Why didn't you let me know?"She turned around to face him, a suspicion of sorrow in her eyes. "I decided to keep it. If I ever let you or your family know, we both know what was likely to happen. I would have been forced to terminate it.""I would have never done that.""Even so, there was nothing you could do about it. At the time, you were still too young to deal with that."He couldn't deny it. Even n
Latest chapter
Disgraceful Chapter 187
Carrying the old, unsent letter in his hand, Ashton took a determined step to Lord Carlton's bedchamber. The door was left slightly opened, as to make it easier for the servants to hear if the lord rang the bell. He stopped in front of the doorway and peered inside. Through the narrow opening, he could see his uncle across the room, sitting on the wheelchair by the window, gazing out into the wintry garden outside."Do come in."The lord called without glancing his way. Despite the head injury, his uncle hadn't lost his usual alertness, and the wheelchair didn't make him look less forbidding. He was very fortunate the injury didn't cause him any permanent damage, and though he hadn't quite regained his normal strength until this day, the doctor said that he would no longer need the device in a couple of weeks.Lord Carlton turned in his wheelchair to face him as he entered the room."What is it?"His uncle
Disgraceful Chapter 186
Present DayWhen Ava peered into his chamber this morning, she found that he'd been able to get out of bed without any help. He stood in front of the mirror with a brush covered with lather in hand, meeting her gaze within the reflection. He paused, watching her breeze into the room and walk toward him."Oh, you're up already. Do you feel any better today?"She asked casually."Very much so. I think I'm going to have some fresh air. I'm tired of being confined in this room."Stopping within a foot from him, she glanced at the shaving equipment on the dresser."Let me help you.""There's no need-""Sit over there."She ignored him, motioning him to sit on the sidetable. Obediently, he did her bidding, half-sitting on the edge of the sidetable. With a brush, she smoothed the lather evenly ove
Disgraceful Chapter 185
For a moment, she was quite bewildered by his request, but then she realized, by asking her to do so, he was trying to be completely truthful to her, to share his darkest secrets with her, no matter how sordid and shameful they were, to let her see the ugly side of him and to trust her without reserve.She settled back into the chair and took the letter from his hand. She opened the envelope and unfolded the letter, clearing her throat before she started reading,"Dear Carlton,I hope you will understand why I choose this way. I can no longer carry on in this fashion. It's not that I don't love you enough to go on. No words can express how much I love you. I die a little inside each time I see you. You can't imagine how difficult it is for me, but we both know that this is the best for us. I know you can't desert your family, and I don't blame you, for I can never do that to my son eith
Disgraceful Chapter 184
Several hours later..."This is unspeakable. I can't believe it."Magnus' voice carried clearly across the hall. He turned around abruptly, wild sparks shooting from his eyes as he gazed furiously at the woman sitting in an armchair on the other side of the room."For Christsakes, why would you do this, Mother. How could you?"Lady Cecily stared into the void without so much as a word. Her eyes devoid of emotions, her refined feature as hard as granite.Sitting in a wheelchair pushed by a servant, Lord Carlton entered the parlor. Behind him are two of the guardsmen. Shooting a bitter look at his wife, he uttered with a composed voice."You'll be up before the magistrate to face the legal consequences of your crime. I've sent words to the authorities. The Constable will pick you up at first light."The lady took the notice with a pr
Disgraceful Chapter 183
With soundless steps, Ava sneaked her way to Lord Carlton's bedchamber. The door was slightly opened, allowing a shaft of light from inside the room to spill out into the dark corridor. Stopping by the doorstep, she peeked into the room through the small opening. In the middle of the large bed, the lord lay as white and still as death. A candle burned in the nightstand, casting a dim glow in the gloom of the chamber.Drawing a long, fortifying breath, Ava slipped into the chamber. Crossing the room, she moved around the bed and sat in the chair nearby, gazing regretfully upon the lifeless face.To have a death on her conscience was too great a burden to bear. Perhaps she was a fool to think that to confess her sin and beg forgiveness from the insensible victim would give her a little comfort, but she just couldn't help it."I'm so sorry, My Lord." She began."I thou
Disgraceful Chapter 182
There hadn't been much progress on Lord Carlton's condition the following day. He remained unconscious, only a faint pulse indicated there was life in there, yet it hung by a tenuous thread. In the morning, Doctor Haynes returned to check on him. Ashton asked him if there was any hope, and the doctor shook his head slightly in answer.In contrast to her dramatic reaction over Lord Carlton's condition the day before, Lady Cecily showed little interest in taking care of her husband. Instead, it was a loyal servant that had worked for the family for nearly fourty years who seemed to care deeply about him, feeding him with broth and water every hour, and applying soothing balm to his chapped lips. When she had finished her gentle ministrations, the old maid would kneel beside his bed and folded her wrinkled hands, praying for the master's recovery.Inside one of the sitting room in the secluded West Wing, Ashton stood gazing into the fire where
Disgraceful Chapter 181
Ava blanched upon hearing his oath. She'd never heard such ferocity in a person's voice. Quick to notice her sudden pallor, Ashton took her hand, murmured some excuse to Aunt Cecily and Magnus, and led her out of the room."Your hands are so cold," He looked down at her hand in his hold with concerned frown. Too overwhelmed with distress, she let him take her to her chamber upstairs."Nobody will know about it." He said once the door closed behind them, and when she remained mute, pale and cold with fear, he headed to the sideboard and poured a glass of brandy. He made her finish the drink in two long swallows, and took the empty glass from her trembling hand. Setting the glass in the nearest sideboard, he placed his hands on her arms, forcing her to look directly into his eyes."Listen, I've told the guards never to breathe a word about it to anyone. I'll replace them immediately. Don't be afraid, I won't let anything bad happen to y
Disgraceful Chapter 180
The next thing she knew, Ashton and the guardsmen already moved with mad haste to save Lord Carlton's life. By sheer luck, one of the guards had managed to get a wagon from a local farmer to bring the wounded lord home. She fixed the bandage and tried to slow down the bleeding, doing the best she could without further question, since the severity of the lord's injury left no time for explanation. Unfortunately the process of removing the lord from the building into the vehicle and the rough journey back home seemed to worsen his condition. Once they arrived home, a servant rushed to fetch the new doctor. During the wait, Ashton could hardly think of anything else. He was too distraught with fear, not certain Lord Carlton would survive another minute. Thankfully, within minutes the doctor arrived with his nurse."I'll do my best."Doctor Haynes promised before closing the door to Lord Carlton's bedchamber.
Disgraceful Chapter 179
It seemed like the matter was urgent and highly confidential, Uncle Carlton didn't even leave his name on the message. Pulling the top drawer, he slipped the note beneath the piles of documents and rushed out of the room.*****By the time Ava returned to the study, an empty room greeted her. A sudden sense of premonition settled over her, and she instantly suppressed it. He might have retired to his chamber, or he might have been doing some other activity in another parlor somewhere in the house, she told herself. Still, she couldn't help but quicken her pace as she rushed through the house, desperate to find him as soon as possible."Edward, where's my husband?" She asked when she came across the butler in the corridor. The butler halted and bowed."His Grace has left the house a few minutes ago, Your Grace."Her heart immediately missed a beat."What?! Where?""I
