I hated breaking this news to my precious girl. I had never had children of my own. I had lost my husband Tom in the war. He went to fight and he never came home to me. I couldn’t bring myself to be with someone else. I stayed in the home we had bought together. The house we planned to make our family home. Only it became my own lonely haven. A home on my own. Because after losing him I couldn’t imagine being with someone else.
So that meant we never had the future we had planned together. No children. So I enjoyed the children of my family. Spending time with them when I could. It was a true privilege to bring Violet up when her parents passed away. I never did understand where the rest of her family had gone to. All having fallen out with her parents, it appeared I was all she had left. But it gave me the joy of bringing up a child even if I was old at the time.
And bring me joy she has done. So much joy, so much happiness and so much proudness. She has never been any trouble really. Always such a sweet girl and always so willing to please. But I was made aware of this situation from the start. The moment I agreed to bring her up I was passed a sealed letter from a solicitor explaining everything to me, so I knew. I knew it all in depth and had never shared it with anyone else until now. Plus, I had been able to research, too in preparation, but I still knew what had to be done. But it never made me question my decision. This girl had needed me, and in truth I think I had needed her, so we had plodded on through her childhood years. Making memories together.
But, yes, I always knew this day would come. It just seems to have come around so quickly. I am not sure I am ready to let my girl go just yet, and by the look in her eyes, I am not sure she is understanding why this has to happen.
I can’t teach her the things she needs to know. If I could, then I would. I truly wish I could. I tried to research so I could, but I am just not able to. She needs to be with those like her. And I am not a shifter. That gene comes from her Daddy. Seeing the hurt in her eyes is hurting me. But I made this promise to them back then. It was in the papers for Violet if anything was to happen to her parents before she was of age. That these plans were followed. I have to follow the wishes of her family. That is what her Mum and Dad wanted for her. It is only right.
“I am sorry sweet girl, I really am. It is the wishes of your Mum and Dad. It was written down in plans for if something happened to them” I try to explain to her.
“And is this just so they can teach me about being a werewolf?” she looks to me, nerves all over her face.
“I assume so, sweetheart. I don’t know for sure. I need to reach out for the packs I have listed that your Dad’s family members were at” I tell her, explaining all the information that had been provided to me in the information from when her parents died.
She sits nodding. “So if I go, I can learn what I need and leave like my Dad?” she demands.
Oh goodness. I have no clue about this. This is not how packs work from what I gather. Is this not what got her Dad in trouble with his family? I don't want to give her false hopes. Or give her ideas that could get her in trouble.
“I don’t know, darling. Perhaps if you speak with them. Explain you would rather live alone away from pack, they may allow this. I don’t know how this works though. I don’t know how the packs work”, I tell her.
She frowns “I do not plan to stay in a pack, Aunt Della. I want to come back. I can come back, can’t I?” she looks to me.
“Darling, I am getting older, you have so much more to live for than being with me. You must go to a pack in the months before your 17th birthday. Because things will start to change soon after, and you must learn” I tell her all that I know.
“What pack is it? The one that my Dad left?!” she asks.
“I don’t actually know yet. I have to call around some. There is a list of contacts that were given to me when you moved in, that are packs where family members of your Dad lived. I will contact them in the hopes they will be more willing to help now than they were back when your parents had died.” I explain.
“And if they aren’t, then what?” Violet looks confused.
“Then I will have to speak to some of the Alphas I guess.” I say.
“Alphas?” she looks puzzled.
Hmmm seems she is completely clueless.
“Yeah, Alphas are the head wolves I guess. The ones in charge at the packs.”
“How do you know this, Aunt Della?” she is eyeing me questioningly.
“Well, I guess I researched a little. But not enough to be able to teach you. They won’t let me. You need someone who is a shifter too, hunni, so they can help you through it. But you know I will always be here for you”
I watch her wipe away a tear. I am dreading this.
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Dear Diary…
I can see that this is hurting Aunt D. and that makes me feel even sadder about the whole thing. I don’t think she wants me to leave. I don’t want to leave. But I don’t think we have a choice. I hate this. How can this be happening? I genuinely feel like I am dreaming and will wake up because it seems so far-fetched and crazy. It makes no sense. But Aunt D seems determined to make this work, make plans to get things in place for me, get help for me, so I know what to expect. Yet, in truth, I am terrified. Why did my Mum and Dad never tell me? Why could they not still be here? I feel so alone.
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Well, it seems the day is here. Aunt Della has been ringing around the werewolf packs that were linked to my Dad’s family. Who knew there were so many werewolf packs in the country that are not known about!And surprise surprise, my family yet again did not want to know. If you can call them family when they treat you like that. My Dad had certainly pissed off his family by deserting his pack. Even his death was not enough to allow forgiveness. Yet surely they would see it as him protecting his wife, would they not? She was being picked on, pushed out by the others in the pack because she was not the same as them, so he did what he felt he should to keep her safe. Surely that is an honourable thing to do, is it not?! I truly do not see why his family are so hard on my Dad’s choices. Or was there more to it than I knew?But as it turned out, there was an elderly aunt of my Dad’s at a werewolf camp a couple of hours away from Aunt Della’s house. Having spoken to my Aunt, she was willing
I am sat on the bed in my new room, the boxes and cases left on the floor as I stare at the walls ahead of me. I can’t believe I am here. Aunt Della has already gone. I watched the lights of her car drive away knowing that the only part of me I knew was leaving me now. The last part of me. All the things ahead of me were the unknown and it terrified me. All this stuff about werewolves and shifting sounds crazy. How is this my future? How is this the stuff my Dad kept from me? I feel like I am in a parallel universe. Like this is not real.“Hey Violet, you ok, doll?” I hear a voice from my door, making me jump and disturbing my confused and frazzled thoughts.I hadn’t realised the door was still open slightly. Stood there was Beta Tate. He was smiling kindly at me.“Oh yeah, the greatest” I smile, sarcastically.“Ok, that was maybe a stupid question." he grins. "You want some company? Or some help unpacking?” he asks.Is that normal for a second-in-command to help someone unpack? Or of
Alpha Lachlan, my best friend, had told me about this new arrival we had arriving in the pack, so I had been preparing a room for her, unsure what to expect, but knowing it would be down to us at least partially to teach her all about werewolves. Some crazy shit to think she has gotten to almost shifting age and she didn’t even know about it. Though I guess with her Mum and Dad dying, it is understandable. But I can’t begin to imagine not knowing. Growing up and then finding out weeks before you are due to shift.We grew up with werewolves all around us, learning about them from a young age, knowing they were real, knowing our parents could shift so it never came as a shock. But for poor Violet to be told by the woman she had been brought up by since the age of six, I think they said, the woman who had taken her in when her parents died, because no fucker else in her family wanted her because of the shit going down with her Dad. Fancy finding out that she was to be kicked out and, oh
“So, we getting this pizza or not?” I pouted at the guy in front of me. He was handsome in a goth warrior kind of way, I guess.“I did say we would, didn’t I? So come on, little miss happy, lets get to stepping. You going to smile though?” he smirks as he heads to the door.Cheeky bastard calling me little miss happy. I was happy, until they bloody well moved me here. Now I am having to spend time with a bunch of people I don’t even know. Do they even constitute as people when they are half wolves? Still, I best do as they need me to, learn what I need. Then I can get out of here quicker. Or at least that is the plan.But listening to what Tate said, it doesn’t sound like it is such a good thing at all. Though my Dad managed just fine for a long time. But he said he would teach me about it, so I can come to my own conclusion. I will be an adult soon enough. They would have to let me do as I please then, right? I still get to make my own choices, and have my own rights, don't I? Being
I didn’t mean to snap at her, but she was frustrating me. I know I can’t leave her having not eaten any dinner, so I go and grab some pizzas and then headed back to her room, hoping she was able to find her way back there herself earlier.I doubt I am someone she is wanting to see right about now, but I want to apologise and I want to make sure she eats. Plus, we need to talk a little at least. We need to get back onto an even footing. I won’t settle tonight knowing she is hating me. My wolf will not settle knowing his mate is angry at us. Even if she doesn’t even know we are her mate just yet. I know it and I can’t leave it.I tread heavily up the stairway toward her room. My stomach is churning with nerves. It is crazy that one girl, one she-wolf can make me feel like this without even realising she is doing it. I knock lightly at the door and stand and wait. The door is pulled back, Violet stands barely moving, her eyes glaring at me. Her eyes are beautiful, but I swear, if looks c
I cant even be angry at the guy after he has come back and brought me pizza. Especially when I guess I was maybe a bit of a bitch. The pizza was good too. Hearing the stuff he had to tell me about my Dad hurt, I cant lie, but I guess I am going to hear a lot of things I don’t really want to hear in the coming weeks. That is the whole point of me being here, right? All feels so surreal.Seems my Dad was not quite so innocent after all. Or that is assuming the information this guy is giving me is accurate. Though why he has reason to lie I don’t know. So it makes me think the information he tells me is true. Perhaps the information Aunt Della told me was her trying to be nice, trying to make my Dad sound like a good guy. Not wanting to ruin the memory I had of my Dad. This guy has no real reason to lie to me. Aunt Della did, I guess, but in a kind way. Trying to consider my feelings. Trying to keep my Dad a good guy in my mind and heart. Though it likely wasn't going to be for the best
I quickly left Violet’s room. I had to get away! Being that close to her had got awkward and quickly. It was easy to chat to her as we had been eating, just free chatting, laughing and joking. Then, as she was being sarcastic and I joked around, I don’t know what made me touch her. I poked her, teasing. Knowing the instant I did it, I shouldn’t have. She made eye contact and then I was lost. Completely gone. This mate bond is fucking crazy. Powerful stuff.I had been battling though to keep my wolf back, he seems to like being around her. Which I guess knowing it is his mate is only natural. But she has no idea. It is beyond frustrating. Not just with the fact she doesn’t know we are her mate, but the fact she has very little idea about mates full stop. And she seems to have very little interest in them either.I have to say I am a little worried. My fated mate is perfect, beautiful, that there is no doubt of. But it seems I have been fated with a mate that is not that keen on the ide
I am woken by a knock at my door. I groggily get up from my bed and walk over to open the door, to be greeted by Beta Tate standing there, a smile on his face. How can he be happy in a morning?! That is not normal.“Good Morning sunshine” he grins. “Thought I would come and wake you. Lessons start in an hour. Wondering if you were wanting some breakfast? If so, I can show you where the dining room is in the packhouse where meals are served.”I feel really conscious of the fact I am literally standing here in a pair of tiny shorts and a tank top, with my hair all over the place, looking like I have been dragged through a hedge backwards. I smiled awkwardly.“You could have called or texted?” I say.“Don’t have your number doll” he smiles. “anyone would think you don’t want to see me” He grabs his chest like I had mortally wounded him.I couldn’t help but laugh. “Well I am here in my PJs with no make up on, looking like a scarecrow.” I say touching my messed up hair. “So don’t really ap
Dear Diary… Well, how can life change in the space of a year? By a crazy amount when you learn your parents lied. Or perhaps not so much lied but kept secrets from you. Secrets do nothing but make life difficult. Make life twisted and they hurt when they are finally revealed. But the secrets in the end brought me the happiness and life I was meant to have. Could the secrets have been part of the fate that led me here? Who knows? Having learned the things I have about being a werewolf, and how the beliefs are, fate plays a big part in our lives. Perhaps the path my life took was all a part of fate's plan... A path that brought me to the Autumn Moon Pack. To Tate. The handsome, mysterious Beta. The sweetest, kindest man I had ever met, that I was able to call mine. All because of a goddess I had never heard of until I learned of my heritage as a werewolf, blessing him as my fated mate. My fated mate. My love. My future. And now the father to the little one I am carrying inside my
I wake up wrapped in the warm embrace of Tate. His head is resting on my shoulder. “Good morning beautiful” he whispers. I found myself chuckling. “Good morning to you too” I whispered back. “You know I am going to have to get you up and out of bed shortly for your training.” He says with a sigh. “Euurrgghh!” I grumbled. “But the bed is so warm and comfy!” Training has been going on almost each day since we returned to pack six months ago. Lachlan was relentless. Though I can’t blame him, Azaria was just as unrelenting too in her necessity for me to refine these gifts of mine and in her need to make me as strong as she could, both physically and mentally. “Oh. You mean you don’t want to stay in bed because of your handsome mate?” Tate huffs, flipping himself, so he was suddenly on all fours, leaning over me. I find myself smirking at his playfulness. We had most definitely refined our relationship and our gifts… “Perhaps I was just coming to that…” I teased,
The doctor leads us into Damien’s room. He is not looking good. Though what would I know? I am not a doctor. But he looks like he is at death’s door. And it scares me. But he is in the right place. Tate had told me this hospital had some good doctors, and I am sure Lachlan would do what he could to make sure he got the best care possible. Pierce led the rest of the family into the room. All looking equally shocked by the state of my grandfather. I doubt the doctors would allow us all to stay in here together for long before trying to throw us out. “What has the doctor said?” Adam asks, I am surprised he is here, expecting him to be with his son, though I can only assume his mate is there, as I have not seen here since we arrived. Lachlan looks up from where he was standing by the side of the bed, his grandfather not having moved since we walked in here. His eyes not having moved from his brother in the bed. “The doctor said he is stable now. Though he is badly injured. He
I watch her. Doing whatever it was she was doing. Speaking as someone else through her body? She is unreal. How did she manage that? Her eyes shifted, to a deeper blue. She looked like she was from another world for those few moments she spoke. An aura radiating off her that gave that otherworldly glow. The voice coming from her was unrecognizable to me. But the look on my grandfather’s face changed instantly. Color draining from his skin. Eyes wide open as he looked at her, and I could see tears in his eyes. ‘What the fuck?’ I mindlink Tate. ‘Not a clue. I thought Azaria was going to talk, she can do that like most of us can. But that is not her voice. That voice is not Azaria's. I do not know who that is.’ Tate says, yet his eyes have not left his mate. He looked fearful for her, not knowing what to expect. All these gifts are new to us. We don’t know how she will be with them. During them, or after them. What effect they could have on her. But Azaria clearly felt the
I stood watching Lachlan walking away from me. My skin turning cold hearing my brother’s name echoing through my mind. How can they seriously expect me to want to help him? He killed our mother. Kidnapped her. Then tortured her to the point of her death. No. Have they lost their damn minds? I look to Pierce. His eyes are dark, but he is watching me. A sad smile on his face. He knew of this? I find myself struggling to speak. No. Have they lost their damn minds? I can hear voices surrounding me, but they are not registering in my mind. This is madness. This made no sense. They had brought my brother back here. To the pack we had him exiled from. What the hell was Lachlan thinking? Was he even fit to be an Alpha of our great pack? Does he not know what this man was capable of? Suddenly, a hand is on my shoulder, snapping out of my angry mind wandering. I realize there are many more unfamiliar faces surrounding me now. Unfamiliar. But yet they have a hint of familiarit
I stand waiting within the pack hospital as requested by my grandson. Things seem so hectic in the pack. My son dashing off here and there. I hate being old and not quite so able to help anymore. That used to be part of the role of Alpha I loved the most, the drama… the action. And I have to say it was something I missed as I got older, as I handed down the role to my son. Lachlan’s call was unclear. The signal was not good, and the reasoning behind him wanting me at the hospital was not quite explained. He just asked me to be here, saying I would be the best candidate for a blood donor if needed. I am not going to decline that, if somebody needs my help, it is there, no matter how old I am. I may feel like an old and decrepit man most days, but if I am still capable of helping, if it is needed, then I will be there. I may not be able to do much as a former Alpha and I miss that role and all that came with it, but if I can help, then they could rely on me. I had got here as quic
I watch as they drive away with my grandfather in the back of the truck. Fear is filling me. He looked dead. I was pushing toward him, trying to get to him, wanting to try to heal him. But Tate was mindlinking me, telling me to stand back, to not try this for the first time on him, not to risk his life further when I am not sure of what I am doing. Lachlan is taking charge. The voices are just a blur to me. I hear Adam saying that my grandfather’s wolf is dead. How can that be? He has been suffering, and nobody seemed to know other than his son. How much pain had this man had to endure? “Violet, come on now, we need to go.” Tate is leading me to a waiting car. I can only assume we are heading back to Autumn Moon. Azaria seems to have retreated once more. She is meant to be a gifted wolf yet seems to spend most of her time hiding in the outer edges of my mind. Though my lack of experience of how to deal with her maybe doesn’t help. My body was in a daze. Nothing around me reg
I feel my wolf pushing through and shifting once more, my body adjusting and altering of its own accord, turning into Rye, the dark gray form of my wolf. He seems to have pushed me right to the back. I can sense his anger. I don’t know what happens, but he is suddenly moving toward the two wolves still fighting alongside us, and before I know it, and because they are so engrossed in attacking one another, Rye pounces… Bringing his jaw down on the neck of the Alpha, clamping his teeth into the neck and sinking them in before twisting. The Alpha realizes what is happening and tries to fight back, but the grip Rye has is too tight and the way in which the Alpha is moving is only making the situation worse for himself, as I hear a galling snap as his neck breaks, and he falls from the grip of Rye before Lachlans’s wolf takes him and attacks him once more, making sure he is dead. Aggressively dropping him to the floor once he is done with him, before his human form is suddenly pu
I check on little Alfie. He is still snoozing, his little eyes tightly shut as he is swaddled in his blankets tightly to protect him from the outside elements, as well as having been in the protective embrace of his parents as we have alternated in carrying him since leaving the hospital. He has slept so soundly since we left, and I am glad. Hopefully, he will stay that way until we reach this new pack. I did not expect all of this, but deep down I have to say I am glad. Our pack never offered us much, and the hospital did not have much in the way of options for our little one. We feared we would lose him. Hopefully, our new pack may be able to give us hope for a future for me and my family. My mate and our little one. The pain of losing our firstborn tore us down, but we worked through it and decided to try again. We were overjoyed to discover we were expecting another pup. Our beautiful child. The creation of our love and happiness of being mates. Only to discover he too had th