I. Dior's Death

November 12, 20XX - B City's Base Hospital - West Pantry.

Inside the medium-sized pantry, two women were in a silent battle. One was in a deep trance, and the other one was throwing worried looks onto the other. Finally, the latter couldn't help but open her mouth and voice her thoughts.

“You know what, friend? How about taking a leave? We know you're in a very low mood because of what happened, no one would blame you for taking a rest. Even if they try to say something, I'll teach them a lesson. I'm afraid that you'll die sooner or later with what you're doing right now. See how you look right now, it's obvious you have been skipping rest...”

A mellow, kind, and full of concern voice of a young woman pulled Farrah from her deep trance. Farrah frowned, blinking a few times before looking straight back at her friend.

Break? It's not that she hadn't thought of that—but knowing that the person that used to stay up late in that house just to wait for her to come home was now gone—Farrah can't find herself to come back.

Farrah gently shook her head, twirling the old black ballpen in her fingers. She noticed her friend's concerned eyes, and it made it even harder for Farrah to meet her eyes. Those blue orbs were full of pity, which stung Farrah so much she could only turn her back on her.

“There's no need for that, Eden. I can manage, and I know what I am doing.” Not to mention the patients. Everyone in this hospital needs Farrah. In times like this, she can't afford to stay away from the hospital.

Farrah heard her friend sneer as if she couldn't believe Farrah would say these words. Soon enough, Eden's slightly raised voice sounded inside the cramped room. “Do you? Do you know what you're doing right now? I think you don't know so let me tell you, girl. You've been staying up night and day for almost a week! Do you want to die early? The world has faced a lot of troubles—floods, earthquakes, storms, and even a freaking zombie apocalypse! But then what? You'll die staying up late?”

Facing Eden's rockets of accusations, Farrah can't find herself to argue. Eden's words were nothing but facts, there's no denial in that. It's been almost a week since she had a full night of rest. She could survive these days probably because of her excessive caffeine intake. Eden was right, she'll eventually die if she continues living this kind of lifestyle.

She also wanted to rest, but every time that she'll lie on her bed, it reminds her that from this moment on, she'll be alone in this cold and vacant bed because the person who she used to share this bed with was gone. In the end, she would fall into the reverie of memories. She would sit there, dazed, in tears, like a devastating mess she had become—until another day comes.

She just lost her best friend, her enemy, her lover, her husband, and the father of her son—a few days ago, exactly on her birthday.

When Dior barged into Farrah's life, her once monotonous birthdays were slowly replaced with joyful ones. The moment Dior accepted Farrah as his other half, there's no sad birthdays for Farrah no matter what crisis they faced. However, at this moment, Farrah's birthday will slowly turn back to the way it was before. Monotonous, plain, and boring.

Farrah, at the age of 27, is now a widow. 

It's been four days since Farrah received the heartbreaking news of her husband's death. Exactly on her 27th birthday, Farrah received the cruel verdict of reality. Farrah's mind was in chaos, her thoughts a mess—her heart shattered. According to Dior's teammates, to protect the weaker ones in their team—Dior fought with a Level Four Zombie and lost. He died with a bite on his neck, striving hard to eliminate a threat to humanity.

It was a powerful blow, enough to disassemble Farrah into shattered pieces. She's been trying to calm down, and be tough knowing that she wasn't the only one abandoned by her husband. There's still David, their son, whom she needs to protect.

But no matter how she pretends to be tough, to be strong—she's nothing but a human being. A person with a heart and mind, not a block of metal without a single speck of emotions. 

Only she knew that there's only a thin barrier between sanity and lunacy inside of her.

Eden saw Farrah's silence as a guilty conscience and felt that she was a bit excessive, so she cleared her throat and softened her voice. “...Don't get me wrong, dear. I'm saying this because I'm worried not only about you but also about your son. You're not alone, darling! You have a kid and a father waiting for you at home. What do you think will happen to DaeDae when you fall ill? He just lost his father, and he needs you.”

Farrah chuckled without joy in her voice, only she knew how bitter it was for her. But then again, she knew Eden was right once again. David needs her, now that Dior is gone, all the responsibilities fall on her.

 “...Okay. But what about the patients? Who will attend them, then?”

Tsk, Tsk. Even in this kind of situation, she really can't stop acting like a holy saint! Eden rolled her eyes and patted Farrah on her shoulder. “Let us handle it—don't act like a holy saint here, you're snatching my patients! What you should do right now is lie on your bed, cuddle your son, rest, and sleep. Forget other people, what you need is your son's warm hugs.”

“...I'm just scared that when I step into that house, all my suppressed emotions will break out...” 

“It's normal, darling. Emotions should be expressed, not suppressed. We're humans, we are allowed to grieve, to cry, to rest, and to prioritize ourselves. Let me tell you something, babe. It hurts, yeah, it really damn hurts. However, to go forward, you must face the problem head-on. Only when you can face it straight with heads up can you go forward.”

*

In the end, Farrah was persuaded by Eden to take a five-day leave. She regrets it a bit but since everyone said they can manage the hospital, she has no longer any reason to refuse going home.

Even if some people were dissatisfied, they couldn't argue with the Director. Not to mention Farrah's well-being, she indeed looked like shit right now and not in the right mind to work. Farrah could only thank them in embarrassment. When she arrived at their house's doorway, what she noticed first was her son's laughter and her father's pampering voice. 

There's a painful feeling that began to dominate Farrah's heart once again as if stabbed by something sharp, she couldn't but wail in agony deep inside. There's a voice that keeps asking, what will happen when this ignorant little thing knows that his father will never come back anymore?

Well, he doesn't have to know. At least not now.