A cheat all along

ALANA'S POV 

"Apologize? Did we fight?" I chuckle like I was crazy as I said to him. Help me moon goddess, I had already forgotten everything that had happened Tonight. 

He looked at me warily like I had already gone mad, but soon, he led me to the bed, and I giggle like a high school girl as I drop down on my back while he held me down and pulled my shoes off. 

Once he was done, I lay there and watched as he stood over me and began taking off his shirt. It was so mighty darn attractive watching my muscles flex without any effort as he drew the shirt down his body and tossed it to the ground. And the way his muscular contours contracted.. fuck! I was getting wet staring at him already.

Arghh! I hated him so much.. why did he have to be so handsome and have such an amazing body I knew I couldn't have because he didn't even like me. 

I could have the best figure in the world and he wouldn't be attracted to me. 

"Lucian… " I suddenly call out, dramatically placing my hand against my forehead, silently telling him I had a headache. 

"I want to vomit." 

Minutes later, Lucian was standing over me, holding my hair back away from my face while I held the toilet seat, puking inside like my life depended on it. My insides were raging with fire, and my intestines were squeezing out every single I had eaten all Day, and yet I kept puking and puking until there wasn't a single energy left in me and I just lay there, placing my cheek on the cool side of the toilet seat as I waited for when I would be nauseous again. 

And Lucian? 

 Lucian was sitting on the foot mat next to me, waiting for when he would have to hold me back so I wouldn't flush my head into the toilet. 

There was silence in the room as I just lay there, my vision getting blurry as I stared into the toilet. 

"This is all your fault… " I murmured, and I knew damn well, Lucian knew I was talking to him. I couldn't be talking to the toilet. I should be thanking it even. 

"I didn't make you drink an entire glass of vodka mixed with liquor and tequila. Why do you have this in your room even.. " 

"Does it matter?" I raise my head up to glare at him, pretending not to notice the splitting headache hurting me. "why do you care to know?" 

"It's suicidal." He clicked his tongue as he replied, and I just roll my eyes. 

"Oh please… like you haven't done worse.. " 

He doesn't say anything, and I smirk. 

"See? You can't defend yourself because you know I'm right. Any woman in my condition would have killed herself long ago or would have run away.. " I gulp the glass of mouth wash he had dropped next to me a while ago, and when I.was some rinsing my mouth, I spat it in, before crawling back to turn to Lucian. 

"Do you know why I didn't run?" 

He didn't reply, but he was just looking at me with an expressionless look on his face as I crawled towards him, shortening the distance between us until our faces were an inch away. He was sitting against the wall, so I was practically backing him up. 

"Do you know?" I ask in a soft tone as I reach up to run my hand against his bare chest, watching his expression which didn't falter even for a second. "Because… I love you." 

There was what looked like shock in his eyes before it suddenly disappeared like all his other true emotions. He pushed me away and I chuckle as I fall on my butt, far from him. 

"You're drunk." He gets up and walks towards me, intending to carry me "I'll take you to your room, and we'll try to get some sleep, okay?" 

I didn't say a word until he carries me into his arms and began walking into the room. Fortunately, I wasn't feeling nauseous anymore. As he lowered me down, I sit up. 

"Do you love me too?" 

He doesn't reply as he dims the light and joins me on the bed. He shuffles his pillows and mine and fluffs them before turning to me. 

"Try to get some sleep Alana." 

"Answer me, or I'm not going to warn you when I want to puke again." I threaten, and it seemed to work, because the next second, he sighed and held the space between his brows. 

"I don't hate you.." 

I smile bitterly. 

"That wasn't the answer to my question, but you still lied.. " 

"I don't hate you." There was an edge to bis voice as he snapped at me, which only made me snicker. 

"Still a lie… and you know why you're unable to prove it, it's because you know you're lying. If you didn't hate me like you claimed, I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't be puking my guts out because I got drunk knowing you got another woman pregnant… "

"Diana is not another woman…" 

"Who is she then?" I raise my brow as I asked, infuriated that he would dare try to defend her right Infront of me. "Your fuck buddy? Friends with benefits? Your girlfriend? Your side chick?" 

I could see her was trying really hard to hold on the anger, and I was dying to see him break in half and snap until he couldn't take it anymore. 

"Alana. Let's put all that behind us and just sleep… " 

I chuckle bitterly before I suddenly crawl into his arms, and before he could realize what was going on, I was straddling him with my arms squeezed around his neck. 

He grabbed my arm, and I could see that cold look in his eyes now which he directed at me when I smirk. 

"I've always wanted to hold you like this Lucian.. " I lean down to breath in his scent and sigh out loud before drawing back to stare deeply into his eyes. "I've always wanted to breath in your scent… just like that… "