Intoxication.

Intoxication. 

“Are you okay, Awdhesh?”

 

“I am fine,” he gushed. "What are you doing at this time, let alone at this hour?" He all but growled, out of breath. 

 

I sighed dejectedly. “Did something happen?”

 

His breathing was hard.

 

“Why do you look anxious?”

 

“I said I am fine,” his tone seemed off.

 

“A-are you sure?”

 

“You should respond to me first.”

 

"Awdhesh, you need not worry about me. I am all right and about to return home." 

 

"If you say so," he glowed at me. 

 

We stared. It was awkward. For the first time, it felt like I was choking at the aura he was inducing. 

 

"Take a walk with me, Radhika. It has been a pretty long time since hmm.. you know..."

 

I cut him off reluctantly. I did not want to speak to him right now regarding that sensitive matter. 

 

"It's okay,” I told him softly, holding his hand. “But I can't. It's already late, and I should go, otherwise, my uncle will be worried. You know how he is. Don't you, Awdhesh?”

 

He breathed out. His hold on my hand tightened when he intertwined our fingers. "Goodbye, Awdhesh." Without waiting for his response, I waved him good night, letting his hand go.

 

And when I turned to leave, a painful grasp at my arm stopped me. He yanked me back to him with such a sudden force that I almost stumbled back; however, I tightened my hold on the handle of the stroller to restrain myself from falling with confusion and trepidation displayed on my face. 

 

"W-what are you doing?" I exclaimed at him while trying to disengage my hand from his painful grasp, stunned. “What has gotten into you?”

 

"What am I doing?" he whisper-yelled, digging his nails into my arm viciously, making me gasp in pain. "Don't, I mean, don't ever cut me when I'm speaking!" When I didn't answer, he continued, "And where the fuck do you think you are going? Hmm? Why do you always have to run away from me? Can't you just spend some time with me? Is that such a big deal for you? I have always been there when nobody was. I too could've left you if I wanted to, but I didn't. Did I? No! I did not. Why can't you fucking see what I want? How do I feel, huh? You know what?" He seethed, breathing hard. "Call home and let your uncle know that you are going to stay at your friend's house for tonight," he ordered me through clenched teeth, breathing harder from his nozzle.

 

I stayed silent. What? 

 

"Do you understand?" He asked rather slowly and ruthlessly after a while when he got no reply from me.

I was too stunned to say a word. 

What could possibly have happened to him? 

 

I stared at him wide-eyed because I was too stunned to reply. I always knew he had a bad temper but hadn't witnessed it before, until now, except when he was drunk one time. He had always been so gentle with me and Shaurya, but now I could not come to decipher his outrageous behaviour. I was shocked, stunned, or scared; I did not even seem to decipher which one of the emotions was more overpowering. 

 

“Did you by any chance drink, Awdhesh?”

 

“Why does it matter?”

 

My breath hitched. He wasn't himself right now.

 

“Are you?”

 

“A little," and now when I took notice of his eyes, I could clearly see the redness surrounding the area. I certainly knew right away that he was sort of drunk. 

 

With reasonable answers, I conjured in my brain, I failed to react because my body seemed to be slower and my mind stuck at believing what I just took notice of. Still staring, I did not see his hand moving dangerously at a fast pace. When he brought his other hand to the back of my head, taking a fistful of my hair in his fist, he tugged it downwards brutally, causing my eyes to snap back to his dark, cold brown orbs. Only then did I decipher, and my eyes welled up at his vice grip. 

 

He was indeed drunk. 

 

He had never misbehaved with me until now.

What was happening? I was stuck somewhere in my mind. My thinking capacity was somehow blocked. 

 

"Do you understand?" He repeated, glaring down at me with a coldness that I had never endured before. He had always been kind and caring for me and my little brother in every circumstance and situation, whatever it may be. 

 

What had happened just now to make him react like this?

 

"You're pissing me off, Radhika," he said aggressively, tugging at my hair rather hurtfully. A tear rolled down my left cheek. It was a misery I wasn't prepared for. 

 

"I-I-it hurts; please let go of it," I whispered tearfully. With one last painful tug at my hair, he let go of it completely.

 

"Let's go! You can inform him from my house!" he ordered, snatching the stroller from my hand and turning to proceed forward. “I'll talk to him myself if the need arises.”

 

"No, wait! I can't." I whispered, standing stiffened at his forceful grip. 

 

He stopped. Slowly, he turned to face me. Stepping towards me, he lifted his right hand swiftly without warning and smacked me hard across my face. The sound echoed through the empty road, and the impact from the smack was so forceful that I collapsed painfully with a loud thud onto the narrow street. In reflex, my left hand automatically came to cup my stinging cheek, and my sight blurred at the forceful and painful smack. 

 

My lower lip trembled.

 

What had happened to my friend? The question was circulating in my psyche like a crammed chapter without a pause. Did he just raise his hand at me? 

 

The numbness from the pain I felt in my cheek was the answer I needed to confirm that he indeed hit me. 

 

He had actually slapped me. 

 

My parents had never even scolded me, let alone slapped me.

 

I turned my face to look up at him, only to see his two emotionless orbs, glaring down at me. For a second, I thought I saw a gentle look overcome his face before it was gone in a split second. 

 

I kept looking up at him for quite some time, trying to comprehend what just happened. But my mind refused to do so. I wasn't prepared to accept it just yet. 

 

"You can't, or you won't? Huh? Come again. I didn't hear you." He took a step towards me, leaving the stroller completely beside him and hovering over me entirely. 

 

I could do nothing but blink my tears away. 

~•~•~•~