Dark Thoughts

Amelia POV

 I stood frozen, my back pressed against the bedroom door, my heart still racing. What just happened? I couldn’t help but replay his words and that stupid, smug grin of his in my head. It was hard enough dealing with Queen Larissa’s venomous words earlier, and now Lucas had to come in, teasing me like that, throwing my whole sense of balance off.

"You’re all flustered again," Snow’s voice echoed through my mind, her tone almost amused. "You really need to get it together."

"I am together," I muttered, pacing back and forth in the room. The words came out harsher than I intended, but Snow only huffed, unconvinced. And honestly, I wasn’t together at all. My emotions were scattered, my thoughts spiraling out of control. Tomorrow, I would be getting married. Actually married. And it wasn’t for love.

It wasn’t real. This was a contract, a deal. A way to protect Lucas and his kingdom. A way to make Ethan regret his decision, I reminded myself of that. Over and over.

"It’s just a contract marriage," I whispered under my breath, trying to believe it, trying to feel better.

But it didn’t work. Not when the Queen’s biting words still echoed in my mind.

"Lucas may entertain you for now, but don't forget… one day, he will find his true mate."

Her voice, so smooth yet sharp, kept cutting through me like a blade. Even if I could fool myself into thinking that Lucas and I had some sort of connection, the reality was staring me in the face. Eventually, I would be left behind. He would find his true mate. That’s how it worked. That's what was fated. I was nothing more than a temporary placeholder.

"Stop that," Snow’s voice cut in sharply, pulling me out of my dark thoughts. "This is what we signed up for. We agreed to this, and you knew it wasn’t going to be easy."

I let out a frustrated sigh, sinking onto the bed. "I know. It’s just…"

"It’s just what?" Snow pressed, her tone softening slightly. "You’re not here to be his true mate. You’re here to help him, remember? This is more than just about you."

"I get that, Snow, I do," I mumbled, staring at the ceiling as my fingers fidgeted with the hem of my shirt. "But it doesn’t make it any easier."

I was here to help Lucas, to secure his position as the crown prince and ensure he could protect his kingdom. But now, I wasn’t so sure I could just keep my emotions in check like I had planned. This wasn’t supposed to feel so… complicated.

"You’re not weak, Amelia," Snow reminded me, her voice more serious now. "You’ve survived worse. Don’t let the Queen’s words tear you down."

I closed my eyes, trying to find the strength in myself that Snow seemed to believe in. But it was hard. The weight of everything was pressing down on me—the contract marriage, Queen Larissa’s venom, and now this sudden announcement of the wedding. It was all too much.

I needed air. I needed to clear my head.

Throwing on a light jacket, I slipped out of the room, careful not to make any noise. The castle was quieter now, the late-night calm settling in, with only the faint sounds of servants finishing their duties for the night. The dim lighting in the hallways gave everything an almost surreal glow, the marble floors gleaming under the soft light. I walked slowly, hoping the movement would help me sort through the mess in my head.

As I passed by Lucas’s office, I could hear muffled voices from behind the heavy wooden door—probably another one of those late-night meetings. He always seemed to be busy, and I wondered briefly if that’s what his life would be like forever. Constant meetings, constant responsibilities.

I didn’t stop. I couldn’t handle seeing him again, not right now. I wasn’t ready for another round of teasing smirks or intense stares.

I made my way outside to the castle gardens, where the cool night air hit me like a welcome relief. The sky was clear, and the moonlight bathed everything in a soft, silvery glow. The garden was breathtaking at night, almost magical, with its sprawling hedges and vibrant flowers that somehow still looked alive despite the darkness. The faint sound of water trickling from one of the fountains added to the peaceful atmosphere.

I wandered over to the fountain, the cool stone edge grounding me as I sat down. I dipped my fingers into the water, feeling its gentle ripple, trying to lose myself in the stillness of the moment. But the Queen’s words wouldn’t leave me alone.

"Lucas will find his true mate."

Those words played on repeat in my head. I wasn’t fated for him. He wasn’t fated for me. So why did it bother me so much?

"Because you’re starting to care more than you should," Snow answered, her voice gentle but firm. "You can’t deny it. You feel something for him."

"I don’t… It’s just the situation," I argued weakly, though even I knew it was a lie. Something about Lucas drew me in, even when I didn’t want to admit it.

"Sure," Snow said, unconvinced. "Keep telling yourself that."

I clenched my fists, frustrated. I didn’t want to care. I didn’t want to feel anything more than what this arrangement required. But deep down, I knew that wasn’t true. Lucas was more than just a contract. He was more than just the crown prince who needed a temporary bride.

And that scared me, especially with Ethan occupying my thought half of the time. The contract marriage was a means to have him regret his decisions.

"Stop overthinking," Snow interrupted my spiraling thoughts. "You don’t have to have everything figured out right now. Focus on what you came here to do. Help Lucas. Protect the kingdom. The rest will work itself out."

"But what if I’m just setting myself up for heartbreak?" I whispered, my voice barely audible.

Snow was silent for a moment before responding, her tone soft. "You don’t know what the future holds. But that doesn’t mean you should run away. You’re stronger than this, Amelia. You’ve faced tougher battles. Don’t let your fear of the unknown stop you now."

I let out a shaky breath, staring down at the ripples in the water. Snow was right. I couldn’t let my fear rule me. I had to stay focused on the reason I was here. This wasn’t about my feelings, or the Queen’s words, or even Lucas’s teasing. This was about something bigger. It was about doing the right thing, helping Lucas in whatever way I could.

"It’s just a contract marriage," I repeated to myself, firmer this time. "That’s all it is."

But as I sat there in the moonlit garden, I couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe, just maybe, it was becoming something more. Something I wasn’t prepared for.

Before I could fall deeper into my thoughts, a soft voice startled me from behind.

“Miss Amelia, is everything alright?”

I turned to see a servant, a woman with dark hair tied neatly back, her hands clasped in front of her as she bowed slightly. She looked at me with gentle concern, immediately recognizing who I was. I guess she may have saw me earlier. 

I forced a small smile, nodding. “Yes, I’m fine. Just… clearing my head.”

She returned my smile, though hers was more genuine, her eyes warm. “The night before a wedding can be overwhelming. But don’t worry. Everything will be perfect.” she says confidently. 

Her words were meant to reassure me, but instead, they only reminded me of the weight of tomorrow. The weight of everything I had agreed to.

I thanked her quietly, watching as she disappeared back into the castle, leaving me alone once more. The garden, so peaceful moments ago, now felt heavy with the burden of my own thoughts.

I stayed there a little longer, letting the night air cool my heated skin, trying to convince myself that I was ready for tomorrow. Ready for this marriage. Ready for whatever came next.

But as I finally stood up and made my way back inside, I couldn’t help but wonder… was I really ready for any of it?