Farewell

After dinner, I tended to Ren’s wound. His fever was cured completely, and he seemed to be as fit as ever. The wound on his arm was healing faster than I expected thanks to the medicine and probably Ren’s natural speed of recovery. Ren seems to have a very healthy body.

“Ren, I think you’ve pretty much recovered…so…” I started to say hesitantly. How do I say this, so it doesn’t seem like I’m chasing him away? All I wanted to do is tell him that his body is pretty much healed and there’s not much I can do for him as a doctor except helping to dress his wound. Dressing the wound wasn’t a hard thing and he could probably do it himself with ease soon as the bandages may not be required anymore because his wound had closed quite nicely.

“Umm…what I’m saying is…if you want to continue on your travel then…” I continued as I struggled to pick my words.

“My arm still hurts plus I don’t have any money on me anymore…” Ren interjected flatly.

Oh…his arm still hurts? Perhaps the wound wasn’t as well healed as I had thought. I also didn’t consider the fact that he didn’t have any money for his travel anymore…

“Umm…if it’s money, I can lend you some. Of course, I…don’t have a lot but in exchange for helping me pick the herbs today, I could give you your share?” I said in an attempt to cheer him up and comfort him. It must be hard to be attacked by bandits and lose all his money.

“I’m not sure if the money is enough for travelling though. If it’s ok with you, can you put up with me for a couple more days? That way, I can make more money by helping you collect herbs and selling it in the village. My arm should be perfectly healed in a couple of days too,” Ren proposed his idea confidently.

His idea does make perfect sense and it would be shooting two birds with one stone by earning him enough money for his travels and healing his arm. However, that meant that I would have to continue living here alone with Ren and spend my days with him for a couple more days…

I didn’t dislike spending time with Ren, but I had virtually no experience being around men and sometimes it made me feel flustered and uncomfortable. Not that I can tell any of this to Ren…so what can I do?

I looked over at Ren who was staring at me with wide and pleading eyes and he waited eagerly for my response. What can I possibly do in a situation like this? I can’t just kick him out, can I?

I sighed silently to myself in resignation. Once again, it seems like I had to go along with Ren’s plans.

“Ok…” I replied, realizing that I couldn’t chase him out when he had no where to go.

“Thank you so much Lin!” Ren exclaimed with joy as he flashed me a wide smile.

It was a little funny to see such a large man smile so carefreely when he was in so much trouble. I chuckled a little to myself at his reaction and I couldn’t stop myself from smiling. Perhaps having Ren with me wasn’t so bad after all. He had become chattier and more open to me which was the opposite to his stern self when we first met.

Just like that, I spent roughly a week living with Ren. We spent our days together gathering herbs and walking together to the village to sell them. I tended to Ren’s wounds until his arm was void from pain and functioned perfectly again.

Finally, it was our last night together in this small cottage. Tomorrow morning, Ren will be leaving to continue his journey for trade. I had very mixed feelings about this. On one hand I was glad that he had completely recovered and could continue on with his travels. However, it surely will be a little lonely to see him leave. I knew he would leave eventually, and I didn’t dare expect to see him again.

I didn’t have the courage to ask if he would ever stop by this village or if we would ever meet again for the fear that the answer would probably be a ‘no’. As he had said, this town was small, and it is unusual for many traders to stop by here on their route. It was probably sheer bad luck for Ren to have been attacked by bandits that he ended up here on that faithful night that I rescued him.

“Lin…” Ren called my name softly from across the table as I sat there lost in thought after we had finished our dinner.

“What is it?” I asked as I snapped out of my thoughts.

“I’ll be leaving tomorrow so…I would like to thank you for taking care of me,” Ren said slowly as he looked into my eyes.

“No need for thanks. Do you need anything for your journey tomorrow? I can help you prepare…the weather should be alright tomorrow…” I started saying whatever came to mind. Otherwise, the awkwardness in what could be our last proper conversation together would swallow me whole.

I got up from my seat and began walking away to escape from this depressing conversation. I wish that he would just leave since leaving is the only option. I didn’t understand why I felt so frustrated. Ren grabbed my wrist abruptly as I tried to walk past him.

“Lin…I don’t have anything else on me but...I would like you to take this as a gift. I want to thank you for taking care of me for so many days,” Ren said as he handed me a gold hair ornament in the shape of a butterfly.

“As I said, there’s no need to thank me…and the gift looks expensive. I can’t accept something like this. I hardly see anyone anyways, a beautiful ornament like this will just be wasted on me,” I said briskly as I turned down his offer. I meant it though, a country girl like me wouldn’t suit that gold ornament. Neither did someone like me need something so extravagant.

“I see…” Ren murmured softly as he slowly released his grip on my wrist.

“Thank you, Ren. I appreciate the thought. It’s late…I should go to bed now. I guess you’ll be leaving early tomorrow morning. Safe travels!” I said as cheerfully as I could while flashing him a confident smile. Let this be the end of our farewell. I really wish you the best, Ren, and thank you for everything. 

--To be continued...