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The day of the turbine
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2024-10-29 19:42:56Day 11. Thursday.
Most of the morning was to be spent arguing the merits of the wind farm. I was surprised that the Gormley-Stuart’s gate, or rather my part in it, was not mentioned. That was history as far as Vera was concerned. I think Julie had heard the conversation between Vera and Larissa, because Vera wanted her to. That way I’d find out. There is no value in having power if your underlings don’t know it.
Julie and Vera were on first name terms There is a friendship there, which is not usual in country houses, between mistress and servant, and there were still Vera’s sexual preferences to evaluate. Perhaps they were sometime lovers - perhaps Vera told Julie what to say to me? I’d have to find a way of asking Vera about these mysteries in the house. That said, the list of ‘to do’ topics in the notebook was getting forever longer. I needed to address them soon, which meant finding a way of inserti
Clive La PenséeMillie comes into her own.
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Day 12.Friday.I only just got to the pub on time. Over breakfast Sonya engaged me in a discussion on the morning that lay ahead. I could have done without it. She likes winding me up.'Everyone thinks that hunt protesters feel sorry for the fox. Why don’t you?''Do you feel sorry for the fox?''Kinda. It’s alive, has feelings. It’s a bit like a weed really.'I knew I was in for a child’s view of the persecuted in this world.'In what way is a fox like a weed?' I sighed.'A weed is any plant you don’t want to grow in your garden. We grow horseradish. We make horseradish sauce and sell it. It’s inedible unless you want your brains through your ears, but some people buy it. Horseradish isn’t a weed - to us. It is a weed to everyone else in the village because it tries to take over the world.''Where do foxes appear?'
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I thought she would explain. Instead, came the change of subject.'Economic reasons to build the wind farm.''Income of about three hundred thousand a year for the land owner, who is a local man, and unless he buys a villa in the Caribbean, which I don’t think he will - Suffolk born and bred, son of the soil and all that - he will wisely spend that money within the community, preferably supporting job-creation schemes and helping local businesses prosper.''That sounds better. If only it were true.'She scribbled some notes, although everything I’d said, and a few pages besides, was on the sheets I’d given her. Finally, she drew breath.'Environmental, and don’t start on about the Niger bloody Delta. This is Suffolk, warts and all. Let’s deal with them.''You can supply local businesses with cheap power by forming your own electricity generation cooperative.''That’s brilliant. That’s why Juli
Coming of Age the Fast Way In Vera's debt
I decided that turning up at the pub, drinking a sherry and going home again, was a compromise I could deal with. She would doubtless ride.I walked home via the stables and dropped in on Sid. I had to tell her that Vera was looking for a lover. But Sid was busy reading stories and being a mother and housewife. I popped next door, to give her time to get straight, but Charley kept me busy a long time.When I finally walked home the pub was shutting. I hated walking in the gloom when strangers were around. Strangers? The village has enough of its own home grown scrumpy-head loonies. Why be scared of the visiting ones?Most of all I was scared of the hunt. That was new territory and I had never dreamt I would cross the threshold into the biggest openly flaunted symbol of plutocracy in these fair isles.I needed Sid to walk with me. What would my severest critic have said?'I am excited and flattered that Vera is so keen on my ideas for disbursing the
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I didn’t go home, but round to Charley’s stable apartment. He was just making his industrial-strength tea. Once settled with a full mug, I came to the point.'What do you know about Vera not riding with the hunt today?''She no longer has a horse. I mean she has plenty but her grey hunter is gone.''What? Explain!''Sold it, I think - yesterday a man in a van from Lowestoft came to collect it. She told me to sign the paperwork and put the company stamp on what looked to me, like a bill of sale.''Why did a numpty oik like you have to sign?''Steady with the abuse. I’m a trusted employee.''Course you are, but that is a bit strange.''And she was a bit attached to the horrible nag. She came the evening before to say goodbye and give me instructions - there were floods of tears - then she fled.'I was silent while we supped tea. I was in shock. Why would she offload a beast she was so fond of? I broke the
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Day 13. Saturday. The birds were making a din. I tried to focus on the clock, but needed first to find my specs. It was only four thirty. Vera had me in a vice-like clinch from behind. I managed to extricate myself without waking her. No idea how. I walked through to Vera’s study. First job - find something to wear. Some woofty kimono thing was hanging in the bathroom. It tied like a kimono, but was sexily short. I thought they should be ankle length. I had to make it do. Secondly - text Sonya, before she wakes and alerts the house to my absence. She’s a worrier. I needed to touch base or she would panic. I kept it short and confusing. ‘Waylaid at ball. Safe and sound - don’t wait up for me. X Mill.’ Third job - reunite Charley with his clothes. He could hardly slide out unnoticed, wearing DJs that probably cost four figures. I met him on the landing between Vera’s apartment and my room. He
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An hour later I was walking past the church, up to the dark cottage in the valley, with an insulated carton of cooked runner beans and scrambled eggs under my arm. How different to my previous attempt to help the Walkers, this felt. A mother’s wisdom - just turn up with something useful, versus the folly of youth - stand at the gate and have a shall I/shan’t I moment.The place looked almost inhabited. The curtains were open and the weeds in the front garden mown. I knocked and Sid’s dad opened. He was sober. I peered through the door. The lights didn’t need to be on as someone had cut the trees around the windows back.'Hallo, Millie. Fancy you dropping by. We were expecting Charley any minute, or Sid, to pick the children up. Sid has long shifts on Saturday, and now that we ...' He hesitated. Maybe he thought I didn’t know about the alcohol problem in the Walker household. I helped him out.'Now that you aren’t drinking anym
Coming of Age the Fast Way Sunday, not so bloody Sunday.
Day 14.Sunday.I woke at six thirty. I hadn’t heard Charley rise. I assume he was already next door, sorting the children out, so that Sid could have a lie in. What drives that man? Is he going for beatification? Silly. He’d have to be martyred first.I dressed, walked home, and found the early morning air unseasonably cold. No wonder. I was still in my shag-me shorts and shirt from the previous evening. My bed looked even colder and more uninviting than the walk home, so I shoved Sonya to one side, crawled in beside her, and snuggled up. I remember a physics lesson on radioactive decay. At the time I decided Sonya - then only about seven - must have a plutonium core, gently decaying to heat the universe - perfect to cuddle up to on a cold morning. That girl will never want for the love of a good man in her life.Sonya turned out at eight and turned me out with her.'It
Coming of Age the Fast Way Vera's tears
‘Why I left with tears in my eyes? I don’t think I was crying,’ she lied. She paused to consider, then said, 'Your dad can guess. Ask him.' 'I have, and he said, ‘another time.’' 'Another time it is then. Next question.' I looked intently down the newly raked sand path, between the roses, toward a beautifully overgrown wall at the perimeter of the rose garden. Should I argue? No point. If she and my dad don’t want to talk about it now, then I should leave it. Next question it is. 'You didn’t ride out on Friday with the hunt, presumably because you had sold your field hunter. Why would you do that?' 'It was a very valuable horse - I needed to raise some quick capital and I knew the company bank wouldn’t help.' 'Come on, Vera. That’s only confounded the riddle. The most that nag could have fetched is a couple of grand and you have that as pin money.' She peered at me over her reading glasses, which she always wore when eating. I
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Coming of Age the Fast Way The final word
Day 331. Friday.Nearly a year has gone by and much has happened.My Diary. I shall never show Vera this diary and she will never ask to see it. It’s better that way. It’s behind us.Vera’s pregnancy. Nothing to report. She either got carried away with her diagnosis, she was lying for reasons only known to her, or she lost the baby. Whatever, if she wants to talk about it, she will. She doesn’t seem fussed, now she has Sid in bed and Tom and Sandra to mother.But why would she lie about that? I have my theory (as always).Charley saw himself as the surrogate father and would never have let the children down. Only by bringing Charley into the house, could she hope to get Sid and the children for herself. Trying to exclude Charley was too risky. He would certainly have been hurt after all he had done for them and may have l
Coming of Age the Fast Way Millie has her say
'A lot has happened since then. I expected more recent thoughts.''It all has to start at that point. If we extrapolate back from all points around today’s Lower Butts, we end up at that fateful morning. That’s where big bang happened. Let’s start at that moment. We can consider distance travelled since then.''That’s fine by me,' she affirmed.'I’m going to assume that you knew Sid had lesbian leanings. I wasn’t sure. You were!'I waited for confirmation. She remained quiet so I took that as a ‘yes,’ and proceeded.'You wanted her and you wanted the children she looked after, so you hired me so that you could have contact without your scheme becoming obvious to the outside world.'Vera stiffened, sitting upright like a governess wanting to make a good impression. She still said nothing.'Then you moved the Walker children into the stable apartments - with good reason I hasten to add. Ch
Coming of Age the Fast Way Nearly the truth
'I need to explain that I’ve taken steps to legally adopt Sid, Tom and Sandra. That will give them financial security as they will qualify for a small allowance under the Ashington estate rules. The adoption was what caused me to go to the Walkers that fateful morning. I also had to broach the problem of them quitting the house. The rest you know.'No mention of blackmail this time. She’s a lousy crook. She continued, 'It’s quite likely that my visit sent Cedric over the top, but it was unintentional. Not that intent will help if I’m prosecuted.''Is that really likely?' I asked.'Probably not, but it’s in the hands of the coroner’s court.'Sid went as white as a sheet. She couldn’t cope with the idea that she could lose her protector and patron. The thought of being solely responsible for Tom and Sandra again took her back to the edge every time.I had two more questions.'Why did you exclude me fro
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Coming of Age the Fast Way Not in the mood
It’s a Friday. I don’t know what day anymore. Weeks have passed.I’d taken the mail to the letter box. As I walked by the bus lay-by on my way home, a car pulled up beside me. The window wound down. There was Detective Sergeant Smythe.'Just hop in please, Ms Backhouse. I need to talk to you.''Do I have to? I’m really not in the mood.''We can do this without you being in the mood,' he snapped.He released the door catch and it swung open. He wasn’t taking ‘no’ for an answer. I climbed in beside him and shut the door. The window whirred upwards.'How can I help you, sergeant?'There was a long pause, while he took his notebook and pencil out. His whole demeanour was that of a fifties cop like you see in TV dramas. I put my hand on the door release and moved to get out again. That concentrated his mind.'You will be aware that you owe me.'
Coming of Age the Fast Way Turmoil
Day 64.Friday. I’ve slept on it and decided I’ll have to ask Vera for her version of events, woman to woman, two friends together. It’s the only way to lay the ghost of Sonya’s ramblings. Should I tell her the full Sonya version? We could have a laugh about it. I didn’t. You can’t laugh about the death of two destitute alcoholics, who had once been the kindest, softest villagers - according to village lore that is. I’d never known them and only spoken to them the few times this summer. The walk up to the House after work that day was the loneliest I’d known. I didn’t notice the late summer colours forming, the swifts collecting on the electricity cables, chattering and practising their departure, the squirrels hunting nuts, and the chill in the air as the autumn mists collected over the sea. It must have all been there. It’s there every October. This was the first October that I had carried such a
Coming of Age the Fast Way Tidying up
Day 64.Friday. Five to seven my phone went. It was Sid. 'Vera is in a state. I’ve tried, but she screamed at me. She is so scared of what may happen. Her husband has refused to go with her, which would have silenced a lot of tongues. Take a hairbrush, make-up and a can of hairspray. Maybe she’ll let you work on her.' Seven on the dot, Vera was outside our house. It felt like the old days. I realised how much I missed her company and doing things with her, although, when I view my diary, we did precious little. The day was blustery and I had run down our long path to the front gate, with my hand on my head, holding my beret down. Once in the car, I could see how dishevelled she was. This woman wasn’t coping at any level. I took a chance with my conversation opener. 'Morning sickness?' 'Not really. I suppose Sid told you.' She pulled away towards the A12. 'It
Coming of Age the Fast Way End of the road
Her message sounded very matter of fact. She was hard to understand, due to background noise and that confused me. It was five thirty in the morning on a lonely country lane in Suffolk. Where did the noise come from? My finger hovered over the delete button, but providentially Sonya came through the office door.'What’s it like to kiss a boy, Millie?'I was incandescent and finished her off as only siblings can.'Jesus Christ, Sonya. Right now, must it be?'Yes - this lad last term - before the holidays. He wanted to kiss me and now he’s going to ask...'I freaked. I shrieked.'Just go and kiss the stupid prat and find out for yourself, and shut the effing door after you!''Sorry,' she flounced, 'I was only asking.'She spun on her heel and headed back out the door.'Well it’s not exactly rhubarb-patch stuff, is it?' I shouted after her.She shut the door with a very loud and ostentatious bang th
Coming of Age the Fast Way Grey dawns and bright sunsets.
'Sorry about the state of the transport Vera. Not exactly your BMW, is it?'Who cares? I’m so pleased to see you. I thought I would have to pay for a taxi home. How much do you know?''Almost everything, except why are they doing this to you?''Larissa! She said she saw me. No problem. She may well have done. She described what I was wearing, which was nothing like what I was wearing and when I handed my clothes over for analysis, the police thought I had destroyed what I was wearing and substituted something else - obviously because I’m trying to hide the blood.''What were you doing at the cottage at five thirty?''What do you think?''How would I know? You had a motive for wanting him out the way. He was the one person in the village who knew about your miscarriage and subsequent charade, wasn’t he?''I thought only your father knew. I regretted having told you that, the moment I‘d said it. Now you have a ho
