You Can Go Home Again

Levi sat sweating in his Tundra in the middle of the gravel road about a mile from his childhood home. The sweat wasn’t from the sweltering Texas sun, however. It was a cold sweat at being so close to the place he had escaped from when he went to college. The day he had left, his teenage self had vowed to never set foot on the place again, but here he was, a grown man come home. C’mon Levi, you can do this. Mom’s waiting. It’s just a set of buildings.

He took a deep breath and put the truck back in gear, driving slowly until he arrived at the driveway. His mother must have been watching for him from the front windows because she burst out of the front door, screen door slamming behind her as he pulled up. She grabbed him in a hug before he could get completely out of the truck.

“Come here, you!” She kept his neck in a vice grip and kissed him repeatedly on the cheek.

Levi laughed and picked his mother up off the ground in a bear hug. “I’d have come home sooner if I knew I was going to get a reception like this!”

Wanda finally let go of his neck, happy tears in her eyes. She took his scruffy face in her hands. “I had just about given up hope I’d ever see you back on this land. I’m so glad you’re home!”

She let go of his face and grabbed his hand pulling him behind her to the porch. “C’mon, honey, I’ve got fresh lemonade and those pecan sandies you like so much.”

Levi tried to pull back a little. “I’ve got stuff to get out of the truck…”

“Never you mind. All that stuff can wait!” She started pulling him again. “You come in and visit with your mama first.”

“I never could say no to you, or your pecan sandies.” Levi threw an arm over her shoulders and grinned at his mother’s enthusiasm to have him home. He hoped he could muster the same in time.

Levi made it to the kitchen in his mother’s wake. He focused on her and her happy chatter, studiously avoiding looking around the foyer or dining room, until they made it to the kitchen. She had painted it a bright cheery yellow and it was obvious to see she was enjoying the new appliances he had bought her a couple of years ago for Christmas. Not only did she have freshly baked cookies on the table but he could smell the heavenly scent of enchiladas in the oven. His favorite.

“Mmmmmm….” Levi said. “Can we skip the sandies and go straight to the enchiladas?” He gave her his best pleading, puppy dog eyes and was rewarded with a laugh.

“They’ll be done in half an hour. I’m sure you can make it until then.” She smiled as she set a tall glass full of ice in front of him and poured lemonade.

He took a large swallow and thought how it made his heart happy to see his mother smile. He’d seen it so infrequently growing up.

“So, have you set a date for the official move-in at Gladewater Terrace?” Levi asked. He had sent her the money for the down payment last week but wasn’t sure when the new build was officially going to be completed.

“You’ll have to put up with me for at least another week,” Wanda announced brightly. “They are finishing up the hardwood floors then I am good to move in!” She clasped her hands in front of her chest like she was trying to hold in her excitement. “I can’t wait for you to see it!”

“A whole week, huh?” Levi stroked his chin, pretending to have a weighty decision to make. “I guess you can stay here another week…if you keep cooking for me.”

She smacked him on his arm playfully. “Oh, you! You know I already have all your favorites planned! Tomorrow is chicken fried steak with mashed potatoes, then I have a lasagna already in the freezer to thaw out one night and….”

Levi grinned and threw a hand up to stop her. “Stop! I’m gonna weigh 500 pounds before you move out! I’m gonna have to start plowing the back forty with horses to stay in shape!”

Wanda beamed. “Oh, you’ll have plenty to do to work it off. Even with the hands, there’s a lot to keep up with. I declare, those new bulls of yours….”

Levi ate his cookies and drank more lemonade just enjoying his mother’s happy prattle, not really listening to all the escapades of his champion stock. Maybe coming home wouldn’t be as bad as he thought.

At first light the next morning, Levi headed to the garage attached to the house to find his old, red Chevy pickup. His mom had told him that she had farm tags put on it and still used it to get to the outer edges of the farm or lent it to one of the hands to go into town to pick up supplies. He was surprised at the well of emotion seeing the old Chevy brought up in him. Some of his best times were had in that truck. Mostly hours and hours spent with Dani.

 

***

 

 

Levi had gone to Dani’s for dinner, as he often did their Senior year, and was so full he was about to pop. Miss Lu always cooked enough for an army and he was always as hungry as one.

“You’re always starving,” Dani giggled. “I don’t know where you put it all!”

“It all goes down my hollow leg.” He wiggled his eyebrows at her jokingly. “Where it goes from there, I’m not sure but I know I have to fill it up again at the next meal!”

They laughed and continued to cut up as they cleared the table for her aunt. No matter how much he ate, he stayed thin as a rail, but he had developed some lean muscles under his loose T-shirts and jeans this past year with all the work his dad had him doing on the farm.

“Let’s go for a ride,” he whispered to Dani as they carried plates and bowls to the kitchen. Up until tonight, they had always gone out with Maggie and JT unless they were studying at her house. Levi, however, had been wanting to get her alone for a while now

Her eyes widened a little but then she smiled, a faint blush tingling her cheeks. “OK, but we can’t be too late.”

As soon as the dishes were done, Dani announced they were going down to the Dairy Queen to see what was happening. It was the teenage hangout in the small town, for kids from Gladewater and surrounding towns. On Friday and Saturday night, it was filled with all manner of trucks, borrowed cars and even a motorcycle or two full of kids from Gladewater and some places even smaller.

“Y’all be back before 11,” Eustace said to them as he started to fill his pipe. “And be careful.”

“We will, sir, of course.” Levi nodded to her uncle as he opened the back door for Dani. “I’ll have her back on time.”

“Where are we headed?” Dani asked from the passenger seat as Levi took the road opposite from the street the DQ was on.

“Out to the farm. There’s a place out off Hwy 233 I wanted to show you.” Levi glanced hesitantly at her. “If that’s ok.”

“Sure.” Dani agreed. He saw her blush again in the dimming light. She hated that her pale skin blushed so easily, but he thought he’d never seen her prettier than when she blushed like that. It made her green eyes as bright as peridots. And it gave him a full feeling in his chest that he could make her do it.

When they pulled off the road past a single line of pines into a clearing, Levi turned off the truck but turned the key backwards so the radio would continue to play.

“How far are we from your house out here?” Dani asked, sounding a little nervous.

“It’s a few miles catty cornered. It’s all wooded out here.” Levi looked at her earnestly. “Dad never comes out this far, don’t worry.”

“Oh, it’s not that,” Dani said, looking up quickly with surprise. “I was just curious is all. I know y’all have a lot of property.”

They sat silent for a few long moments with just the radio playing. Finally, Levi built up his courage and scooted over the bench seat closer to Dani. He took her hand and she looked up at him.

He immediately glanced down and started studying her hand in his. He watched himself stroke her long, white fingers with his sun darkened, rougher ones.

“I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately.” He looked up briefly into her eyes. She returned his look with a small, expectant smile on her face. He looked away again. “I really like spending time with you.”

“I really like spending time with you too,” Dani said, a slight quiver in her voice.

That had him looking up again. Now or never. “Aw, hell, Dani, can I kiss you?” He said a quick prayer that he hadn’t screwed it up.

Dani gave a quick intake of breath then squeezed his hand. Her lips curved up just a bit. “Yes, please.”

He cupped one side of that beautiful, blushing face and kissed her lightly. He thought he’d never felt anything as soft as her lips. He tilted his head and kissed her again, a bit more forcefully; her silky hand came up to his cheek then traveled into his hair.

They must have spent half an hour exploring each other’s mouths, touching each other’s faces. No more than that. Both satisfied to learn this small part of each other’s bodies. When Levi dropped Dani at home later that night, he just sat in the truck staring at the window of her room. He knew he’d never forget this night.

 

***

 

 

Shaking off the bittersweet memories, he headed out toward the bunkhouse to meet with his hands and check on his new stock. If he was lucky, he’d catch them at breakfast and be able to sit down and get to know them a little better. He knew Tim and Ronnie had come to him with good references from several other farms and seemed to know what they were talking about over the phone but in person could be different.

On arrival at the bunkhouse, he was surprised to find no light shining out from the windows and no smells of breakfast on the air. He flung open the old wooden door to find the kitchen and living room empty but a disaster zone. Dirty clothes were strewn all over the furniture. Dirty dishes filled the sink and lined the counters. He even saw a pink bra going round and round on the ceiling fan. His temper began to boil as he stomped over to the bunks. When he saw them passed out, the volcano overflowed. Both his hands were obviously fully dressed from the night before, down to their muddy boots. The whiskey bottles and beer cans lining the walls showed it probably wasn’t the first time either. They had the nerve to do this to his mom?

Levi strode to the first bunk, leaned over and put his face right in Ronnie’s. “GET THE FUCK UP!” Levi yelled.

Ronnie jumped up, narrowly missing hitting his head on the wood of the top bunk. He tried to scramble up, but Levi already had him by the belt, throwing him out of the bunk and onto the floor.

Tim heard the commotion and had his eyes open before Levi got to him. Being so hungover, however, he wasn’t coordinated enough to haul himself from his bunk before Levi roughly grabbed him and threw him across the room too.

“How dare y’all lie in here drunk on my dime! Is this how you take care of my mama and our land?”

“Who the hell are you to - ”

“What the fuck?” Ronnie and Tim started before their brains caught up with their ears and they suddenly realized who had woken them so abruptly.

The men managed to scramble up and stand, slightly swaying and stared at their dirty boots. “Now, boss, yesterday was Ronnie’s birthday so we just….”

“So you just got shitfaced drunk and thought you’d never get caught?” Levi motioned around to the room full of empties. “You fucking expect me to believe this was a one time thing? How stupid do you think I am?”

Levi continued like a freight train, his eyes flashing and voice hard. “I hired you and trusted you to take care of my assets and, more importantly, my mother’s land! You thought it would be easy to take advantage of a woman alone, didn’t you? Well, y’all made a huge mistake because I’m back!”

The men looked at the rage on Levi’s face and recognized silence was probably their best option.

Levi took off his hat and ran his hand through his hair. He paced the room trying to work off some of his anger, kicking empty bottles and beer cans out of the way as he went. Finally, he came to stand in front of the two men.

“You have one hour to get your shit together and get off my property.” Levi’s voice was now low and ice cold. “I suggest you start packing now.”

“But…” Ronnie started to protest but Levi rounded on him and leaned down into the smaller man’s face. “One. Fucking. Hour.” He eyed them both again then turned and left, slamming the door behind him hard enough to make the bottles quake.

Levi got back in his truck and sat for a minute breathing hard. It had been a long time since he had been that angry at anyone. He thought he had gotten his temper under control. He had worked hard at it, never wanting to be anything like his old man. Never wanting to be out of control again. Damn if I didn’t sound just like him, though. Even though they had it coming.

He’d have to go tell his mom he fired the hands and what he had found. He felt guilty for letting her down. He should have vetted them better. He’d also have to check out his cattle very thoroughly to make sure they hadn’t been slacking there as well. One bull in the wrong pasture and he’d lose a season of breeding. First, though, he had to go to the back corner of the property to remind himself who he didn’t want to be. He started the truck and drove.