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Blurred Promises 65
Next morningDERECKLucien enters my office, I look away because I see that he is in a bad mood, he probably slept with his pants on yesterday.“Good morning, Lucien.“ Good morning. “He leaves the coffee on my table.—Did you do what I ordered?“ I did! “Lucien looks at me and I can see the anger in his eyes, which somehow made me laugh inside. “His house is an hour and a half away!“It depends, if I had gone quickly, I'm sure I would have arrived in less than an hour!“I'll want two hours of overtime pay for this.He speaks in a tone, practically imposing.“Are you asking or are you...“Imposing! It's my right! “Lucien demands in a serious tone, and I think he looks very sensual when he does that.—What is it, Lucien, why is this bad mood?“I ask you: why is that? I had an appointment at night and I couldn't go because of you, you have to know that people have more to do “he says seriously.“Commitment to whom? With your little friend?Lucien smiles wryly and shakes his head.“I alr
Blurred Promises 66
DERECK—Lucien,...“Your orders have been carried out, now I need to work! “Eleordena, barely looking at me.“Even after what happened, will it still continue like this?“I just want to continue with my life as it always was... “He stops for a few seconds and takes a deep breath. “Before that night!“Are you going to deny that we both want the same thing?“Doctor Dereck, as far as I know, you don't come out as gay.I stared at him, swallowing hard, suspecting he knows my history.“ I know that your mother is homophobic and I know that you have already left your great love, for fear of coming out, you will deny it.“ This is the past!“ Who guarantees me that it is not a gift?“ I didn't make it clear that staying with you“ I would be willing to publicly admit that I am gay. “ He crossed his arms“ Why not!“ I feel like you're lying to me“Lucien“ You are involved in scandals and I have a child to take care of! I don't have time for this“ And? Doesn't mean I can't date you and take
Blurred Promises 67
Days laterDERECKI'm at the airport, ready to travel. Yesterday afternoon, I dropped my sister off at my sister Nagaina's house; we always do this when we have to travel for work. I was also going to a conference where there would be partners from some companies, which would be a great opportunity to expand partnerships. I'm alone at the airport, waiting for my flight. I like to arrive early, I always do; I push a suitcase trolley, on the way from the national flight area to the international airport. I arrive at the location and come across Lucien. I see that he arrived before me and more, that he came. In the last conversation we had, I gave him the option of not coming with me on the trip. It's not easy having to take care of a little sister.I realize he arrived before me, I approach and greet him. Our relationship is no longer the same, it couldn't be. I can't hide my emotions before him, not while I desperately want him.“Good morning, Derek."“Good morning, Lucien."“You still
Blurred Promises 68
DERECKI hear my name, and I turn around and am surprised when I see a friend of mine from college, Pietro.“ How much time?“Many years... “he said smiling.“I see you are in good company. “Pietro smiles, looking at Lucien, who is next to me.“Nice, Lucien, I'm Dereck's assistant “he introduces himself and in a way that bothers me, because since I've known Pietro, he doesn't miss an opportunity to flirt with a man, I say from experience. Yes, in college, Pietro and I were friends, he already tried to hit on Luke and whenever I tried to have something with someone, he wanted it too. He loved spending time with his friends' partners.“I'm Pietro, I'm a good friend Dereck. “He smiles, winking. “So, are you enjoying the event?“ Quite. “ I replied.“I was referring to Lucien, by the way he has a very interesting assistant on his side...“ Clear! “I say, laughing and shaking my head. Lucien just smiles and looks away.“Lucien, what do you think about having coffee later? When you're away
Blurred Promises 69
LUCIENI leave Dereck's office and go to my desk. Dereck does the same, going to his appointment. I spend some time at the company, sorting out some of my documents and sorting out some things. There's only me in the company, my other colleagues had already come forward. I close my suitcase, turn around and come across Ryco, who is looking at me in a bad mood.“Geez, Ryco, do you want to scare me to death?“What's going on between you and Dereck?“ What do you mean by that?“I'm not an idiot, Lucien, I see the looks, your reaction to her... “Ryco puts his hands on his hips. “She even tries to hide it, but I see a sparkle in her eyes.I don't comment, I just look at her as if I don't understand what she's saying.“Have you guys been fucking each other? You left me to hit the boss, didn't you? So you Lucien, all correct, opening your legs for your boss?—Watch how you talk, Ryco! He pays your salary and mine too, so let's have respect in our work environment.“I know you have been seein
Blurred Promises 70
DERECKIn front of my papers, I am analyzing some documents and signing new partnerships. In the middle there is a letter, coming from another multinational company in New York. In fact, this letter came by mistake, it was for Lucien. Months ago, another publisher opened applications for anyone who wanted to do a management internship at the company. Lucien and many signed up; he, as my assistant, is more than aware of what it's like to have to deal with certain companies in terms of business and everything. That's why he signed up. I took the letter and was in shock, not knowing what to do, I don't know why I'm anxious for the answer. I'm selfish for a moment in wishing that the letter stated that he didn't get the position, as I want him close to me and not far away, but I also hoped that he would be accepted, as it would be a great opportunity for him to grow in his professional career and I I would be very proud. I spend a few seconds looking at the letter, not knowing what to do,
Blurred Promises 71
LucienI'm at home, I just got out of the shower, as I had gone to the gym. I just wear sweatpants and go to the fridge, make a snack and hear the doorbell ring.I quickly open the door and have a pleasant surprise when I see Dereck in front of me. I then give way for him to enter. I see the concern in his eyes, he looks distressed and afraid.“ Did something happen?He takes a deep breath, takes out his bag, takes out an envelope and hands it to me.“ What is that? “I ask, already opening the envelope. I take out the letter and start reading. I was accepted to do a 4”month corporate management internship and, if all went well, I would be given the position on a two”year contract. I'm speechless.“Congratulations “Dereck says with a trembling voice.I look at the date the letter was signed and it was just over a month ago; I only have fifteen days to prepare.“Dereck, when did you receive this letter?“ A month ago...“ One month? It took you a month to show me this?“I know, sorry! I
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3 years laterDerekIn my room, just wearing a towel, choosing the suit I'm going to wear. I go to the wardrobe and see the shirt I wore the day I met Lucien at the strip club, a splendid night and a path to happiness, which I interrupted or which fate did not allow. I show a smile and run my hand over my dress, I close my eyes remembering the wonderful night I had. I remember his hands on me, feeling me, a touch without kisses, but one that managed to cause incredible sensations in my body. I open my eyes, returning with my feet on the ground; I close the wardrobe and finish getting dressed.I had been invited to the opening party of a multinational company called “Lucius”. An international magazine company, and one of the most expensive. This company exists in several places around the world and now it would have a branch here too. I had no idea who the partner of this company is, since it chooses a partner in each country where it has an established branch. However, I know one thin
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Blurred Promises Epilogue
LUCIEN I wake up early because I have to prepare Carol before going to school. I wake up 15 minutes late, now that I'm anemic, nauseous and dizzy. I'm slower and I can't have the same agility as before, but I'm improving. Dereck gave me his room and went to sleep in the guest room as I ordered. Lazily and drowsily, he gets me out of bed and leaves the room, walking down the hallway until I reach Carol's room. “Carol, wake up... “I say, entering the room and see the empty bed. I hear voices and I walk calmly, because I recognize Dereck and Carol's voices in the bathroom. I look over and I can't believe it when I see Carol already ready and Dereck holding her hair, trying to make a bun. The two talk, laughing. Carol teaches Dereck how to make a bun and the two have fun together. This dedication from Derek moves me. “Lucien, good morning... “Carol notices my presence. They both look at me without understanding what is happening. “ Sleep well? “Derek looks at me smiling. “Yes... “I
Blurred Promises 76
Lucien Next morning I was sitting on the bed in the hospital clinic. After so much effort I managed to eat, as she was dying of nausea and lack of appetite. Days later I felt unwell again and ended up in the hospital again. In fact, I had severe anemia and needed care. I finish eating lunch and place the plate on the tray. I pick up my cell phone and start texting my friend, wanting to know about my sister. I'm missing my little one. As soon as I pick up my cell phone and the door opens, I see the vision of Dereck and Carol entering my room together. Carol soon runs to me, carefully sits down on the bed and gives me a hug. “ My love! “I give a lot of kisses, full of longing. “ Are you well? “Yes, but I miss you too. Dereck approaches me with a calm look. “Are you feeling better, Lucien? “ What are you doing here, how do you know “Lorena told me everything. “ It's nothing serious. Thank you and thank you for bringing my sister “ I say smiling, because I can't disguise my happi
Blurred Promises 75
3 weeks later Lucien I walk through the garden near my house with my sister, who is now 9 years old. She's getting more and more beautiful and it just fills me with pride. Always on Sundays, from 8am until 1pm, they close the street for walking. It's 9 am on a beautiful summer day. I wear black leggings and a black top, with a cap, and my sister is wearing yellow. Her favorite color. “Lucien, can I have a puppy or kitten?" “Of course you can, but do you promise to take good care of your pet?" “ Promise!" “Okay, this week I'll take you to an animal adoption home and you choose. “Yay! “Carol smiles, jumping. My sister has always liked animals, just like me, but since my dog died ten years ago I've never had another pet. Her name was Betsy, she was my companion and best friend. “Little brother, isn't that Dereck? “Carol points out the last man I want to see on the face of the earth. She runs happily towards him, calling him. “Carol, come back here! “I quicken my steps, wanting
Blurred Promises 74
LUCIENI want to hurt him at all costs. I want him to feel what I felt, to live in a dark world like the one I lived in when she simply took me out of her life as if I were nothing. “You’re no use to me.” I never forgot that phrase, but what continues to kill me inside is the way she said it, looking coldly into my eyes and having said it so easily, without even blinking. I didn't know if she ever really loved me or if it was her comfort, as she said the last time we saw each other, before I went to New York. If Dereck knew, I would leave everything for him, because he had everything here. He felt complete and anyway, he encouraged me to fight for more, but he destroyed every good thing I believed in. He made me see that love is for idiots and only serves as a consolation. That social level is much more important and now here I am. I'm on the list of the most successful.I've been in several places, until I got here, fighting to finally have the world I had left without him. I went to
Blurred Promises 73
LucienI am stopped, as Dereck closes the door again, blocking my passage.“ You are crazy? “Dereck holds my arm and forces me to face him. “You're the one who's crazy and has a level of infinite arrogance!“I learned that from you.“What did you call me here for, then? To humiliate me? To be arrogant and rude?"What did you expect from me?"I stare at him for a few seconds, with no answer to give him, as I was expecting the opposite. I expected a yes and not just on the proposal, but on everything. I was hoping for a yes to having him back in my life. I expected a kiss and hot sex like other times. I was waiting for that Dereck I had known for four years, who said he loved me and adored my sister. That Dereck, who today was more like a Lucifer, a traitorous angel.Dereck holds my face, puts his mouth on mine. A rough, dominating kiss, as if wanting to demonstrate who the alpha is. A good, suffocating kiss, a mix of love and hate, perhaps more hate than love.“ Let me go. “I push him
Blurred Promises 72
3 years laterDerekIn my room, just wearing a towel, choosing the suit I'm going to wear. I go to the wardrobe and see the shirt I wore the day I met Lucien at the strip club, a splendid night and a path to happiness, which I interrupted or which fate did not allow. I show a smile and run my hand over my dress, I close my eyes remembering the wonderful night I had. I remember his hands on me, feeling me, a touch without kisses, but one that managed to cause incredible sensations in my body. I open my eyes, returning with my feet on the ground; I close the wardrobe and finish getting dressed.I had been invited to the opening party of a multinational company called “Lucius”. An international magazine company, and one of the most expensive. This company exists in several places around the world and now it would have a branch here too. I had no idea who the partner of this company is, since it chooses a partner in each country where it has an established branch. However, I know one thin
Blurred Promises 71
LucienI'm at home, I just got out of the shower, as I had gone to the gym. I just wear sweatpants and go to the fridge, make a snack and hear the doorbell ring.I quickly open the door and have a pleasant surprise when I see Dereck in front of me. I then give way for him to enter. I see the concern in his eyes, he looks distressed and afraid.“ Did something happen?He takes a deep breath, takes out his bag, takes out an envelope and hands it to me.“ What is that? “I ask, already opening the envelope. I take out the letter and start reading. I was accepted to do a 4”month corporate management internship and, if all went well, I would be given the position on a two”year contract. I'm speechless.“Congratulations “Dereck says with a trembling voice.I look at the date the letter was signed and it was just over a month ago; I only have fifteen days to prepare.“Dereck, when did you receive this letter?“ A month ago...“ One month? It took you a month to show me this?“I know, sorry! I
Blurred Promises 70
DERECKIn front of my papers, I am analyzing some documents and signing new partnerships. In the middle there is a letter, coming from another multinational company in New York. In fact, this letter came by mistake, it was for Lucien. Months ago, another publisher opened applications for anyone who wanted to do a management internship at the company. Lucien and many signed up; he, as my assistant, is more than aware of what it's like to have to deal with certain companies in terms of business and everything. That's why he signed up. I took the letter and was in shock, not knowing what to do, I don't know why I'm anxious for the answer. I'm selfish for a moment in wishing that the letter stated that he didn't get the position, as I want him close to me and not far away, but I also hoped that he would be accepted, as it would be a great opportunity for him to grow in his professional career and I I would be very proud. I spend a few seconds looking at the letter, not knowing what to do,
Blurred Promises 69
LUCIENI leave Dereck's office and go to my desk. Dereck does the same, going to his appointment. I spend some time at the company, sorting out some of my documents and sorting out some things. There's only me in the company, my other colleagues had already come forward. I close my suitcase, turn around and come across Ryco, who is looking at me in a bad mood.“Geez, Ryco, do you want to scare me to death?“What's going on between you and Dereck?“ What do you mean by that?“I'm not an idiot, Lucien, I see the looks, your reaction to her... “Ryco puts his hands on his hips. “She even tries to hide it, but I see a sparkle in her eyes.I don't comment, I just look at her as if I don't understand what she's saying.“Have you guys been fucking each other? You left me to hit the boss, didn't you? So you Lucien, all correct, opening your legs for your boss?—Watch how you talk, Ryco! He pays your salary and mine too, so let's have respect in our work environment.“I know you have been seein
